Dec 24, 2025
When I see two men interact kinda gay ,or a gay couple, and suddenly I feel like a sad gay boy (That fagulous alter is very upset we don’t have a boyfriend)
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When I see two men interact kinda gay ,or a gay couple, and suddenly I feel like a sad gay boy (That fagulous alter is very upset we don’t have a boyfriend)
Yk. If I miss anyone from my ex partner system it’d be maeves. She was always so sweet and so cool. God I miss that girl. I hope when she fronts she’s doing well. I hope she still thinks fondly of me.
Loosing a partner system also means loosing a whole friend group. Sigh. It is what it is I suppose.
Figured out why managing relationships outside of my head is extremely straining. It’s because I’ve got to manage at least 5-10 other ones INSIDE MY HEAD at any given moment. Like mother fucker this is EXHAUSTING. Though everything is because we’ve got a bajillion other disorders too😒
Something difficult you have to come to terms with when you figure out you’re a system is that,
You do not know your alters. You cannot decide who they are or how they act or what they like/dislike. You have just met them and you’re going to have to get to know them if yall want to function and survive. Not only get to know them, but love and respect them. No matter how difficult or different you are, they matter just as much as you. Furthermore, you all are equals, you (the host) are not above the others. Nor are your wants and needs more important. Not only are they a part of you that each need care but their own individuals that deserve care.
It will take time but you can come to learn to take care of, respect, and bring peace to yourself and your headmates <3
I’m writing this because I’m having to accept this myself rn, i know we’ll figure this out eventually.
CAN MY BRAIN FUCKING PICK ONE WHY ARE WE EXISTING ALL AT ONCE
THIS
IS
HELL
THIS SHIT GENUINELY HURTS IT IS PAINFUL
If the evil little clown in my brain doesn't stop giggling and making a third of my brain feel silly things might get a little whacky around here especially when we've all been reminded blood magic exists 😄
Calm your ass down and stop giving me the urge to cause absolute chaos 🫵
Having a shattered personality is whack because wym the thought of that happening sounds like both the end of my life and like I would be completely fine at the same time? Wym it feels like my inability to stay the same for long enough feels like it’s ruining my life and my relationship? Wym I just want this all to be over because that would be so much better than the instability?
It’s a crazy world i live in 💔
(P.s. yes I’m probably going to speak to my therapist about it)
I’m going INSANE I need cooler hair now or I’m gonna LOOSE IT 😭
/EVERYONE ONE OF US
seriously we’re all losing our minds because our hair is so insanely boring 💔