#pauling x reader

[aerowolf]

the mercs realize it's your bday and you didn't tell anyone because your family doesn't do birthdays

I’m so sorry this is a mess between British and American english. I have an American parent and a Canadian one so it messed me up lolll

if didn't include a Merc you wanted, feel free to request and I'll try and add them :]

includes: Miss Pauling & offense classes

cute platonic, gn!reader

warnings: n/a, this is basically all fluff

You'd rather not make a big deal of it being your birthday, even though it is you were taught that birthdays aren't a big deal and your family never really did them.

You kind of wish someone would care but you feel guilty about that so you choose not to tell anyone about it

The only one of these who actually knows it's your birthday is Miss Pauling, who’s seen your personnel files

Miss Pauling

She knows it's your birthday, and instead of ignoring it she decides to at least discreetly make it a good day for you

She arrives on base for a routine inspection, clipboard in hand, but once she's done with the main thing, instead of leaving, she comes to your room

"I saw that it's your birthday today. I don't know if you celebrate, or anything, but, uh, I thought you'd like a gift. Maybe."

She hands you a box, inside are some candy bars and a plush of a bear

"I know it's not exactly the nicest thing, and I know it's kinda... stereotypical... but, y'know, I thought you'd like something. So, happy birthday. From me.” She’s really shy about it, you get the feeling she didn’t--probably still doesn’t--really get to celebrate birthdays either. 

She offers you a ride on her motorbike, something nice, on the open road--away from this base for a little while. You accept, taking a seat behind her, enjoying the open air--though it is pretty hot out. You guys talk, just enjoying the time.

She smiles at you as you get back. “Happy birthday. You deserve it.”

You thank her and even give her a hug. It’s nice that you got this for once. 

Scout

He has no idea whatsoever that it’s your birthday. He’s interacting with you like usual, teasing you, just hanging out. You’re happy as you talk that day; he’s always good at making you laugh and smile.

At some point he notices that you’re a little down, as much as you may try to hide it, he can tell. You’re his friend, and even though he might act like he doesn’t care sometimes, you know he does. A lot.

You tell yourself you don’t want anything on your birthday, that it’s easier if no one knows, but secretly, you do.

“Hey, what’s up? C’mon, ya know I can tell when something’s wrong.” 

You tell him it’s nothing. 

“You sure? Really? You’re kinda… I dunno, sadder than usual.” After he asks a few times, you finally come out and tell him. You don’t say much. Just “It’s my birthday.”

“No kiddin’? Well, why didn’t ya tell me?” He comes off pretty strong. You feel kind of apologetic for mentioning it, and look away from him. “Aw, hey. Y’know what--it don’t matter. I’m gonna throw you a party like you ain’t never seen, believe me.”

You try to tell him you don’t want a party--well, you do. Maybe. No you don’t. Well, sure. But not a big one. He’s really sweet and enthusiastic about it. “Someone like you deserves a big birthday--but if you don’t want it, dat’s okay. Ya know, we could just hang out, or somethin’. You n’ me, yeah?” 

You tell him you’d like that a lot. You both find a quiet spot in the base where you can just talk. He messes around, too, and pops in a Tom Jones record. 

He’s a little shy, a little embarrassed, but he even sings happy birthday to you. He just seems glad no one can hear him. He doesn’t have a gift handy for you, but he ends up scribbling you a quick doodle of him telling you happy birthday. It’s misspelt, but the drawing is cute, and you keep it. “I hope ya had a good day. I’m just sorry I didn’t know sooner.” You tell him that it wasn’t his fault, how could he have known? 

After all is done, he gives you an awkward hug. You smile and return it.

Soldier

He’s a little crazy so he’s just hanging around base, today he had the idea to strip and cover himself in honey, so everyone has had to convince him to please not do that, and now he’s just moping around, muttering about how anti patriotic this all is.

You sit next to him and mope as well. Unlike him, no one knows the reason you’re moping. To anyone else’s point of view, you’re just comforting him--for whatever weird reason. But he sees that you’re just as sad as him.

“What’s wrong, maggot? Is there someone who needs to see my fists meet their face?”

You tell him no, no one did anything. You’re a little intimidated by him, and you don’t see much reason to tell him anyways. But it’s nice sitting with a friend. 

“If it’s not a person, then… it must be an object! Give it to me and I will destroy it immediately.” He’s being as sweet as he can, you smile and shake your head.

You sit there for a bit, smiling as you watch the other mercs come and go. Today isn’t a bad day, just a little sad. Later, you plan to find some kind of sweet treat to eat alone.

Soldier stands up, at attention, and points at you. “MAGGOT, AS YOUR SUPERIOR AND SENIOR, I ORDER YOU TO TELL ME WHAT IS WRONG!”

With a sad smile and a chuckle you finally tell him.

“Your birthday?” Soldier seems genuinely surprised. He places a hand on his chin and thinks. “We cannot go without celebrating! This is momentous!”

Although you try to protest, he turns to the base, stating to every other merc, “LISTEN UP! IT IS Y/N’S BIRTHDAY AND WE WILL CELEBRATE!” 

He makes it his personal mission to decorate for a party that very evening, even gets a cake and everything. He makes every other merc sing happy birthday with him. Maybe this isn’t so bad.

You give him a big hug, and he is surprised at first, but proceeds to give a gentle laugh and hug back.

Pyro

You see Pyro colouring with crayons and coloured pencils on their break, and you sit by them. You don’t really understand what they’re saying a lot of the time, but you enjoy hanging out with them. It’s a long period of silence before you join them in colouring. Regardless of your artistic skills, they’re impressed and encourage you, and are very happy when you show them what you’ve been working on. 

After a little while you get kind of bored and sad. You’ve tried to enjoy this day but it’s another bittersweet birthday. You’re happy to hang out with Pyro though, even though they don’t know what day it is.

Pyro notices that you’ve stopped colouring with them, and that you’re looking at the ground instead, messing with the cracks in the floor.

“Huddah hrmmf mmmrph?” You don’t understand what they’re saying exactly, but you smile at them. They seem to be asking what’s wrong, why you stopped, why you seem so sad.

You hesitate for a moment before finally confessing. They seem to mostly understand what you mean, and they lean back, thinking. 

After a few seconds, they stand up and help pull you off the floor. They point to their room, and you follow them. It’s an odd combination of scorch marks, colourful drawings, weapons, and art supplies. They lead you to a wardrobe and pull out a box. 

Surprisingly, you can see that it's fully wrapped. Did they somehow know it was your birthday? Do they keep these gifts on hand for the mercs?

You won’t get an answer, but they excitedly push it out and offer it to you. “Huddah hmmph!” They sound almost like they are smiling behind the mask. You take the box and open it. It’s got crayons, pencils, and… wow, that’s a drawing of you and them.

You smile, almost ready to tear up, and thank them. You give them a hug, and you notice that they’re hugging you back even harder. Maybe they don’t really understand, but this is sweet.

[ramblinscramblin]

Hey there! I read your headcanons and they are pretty cool! I wanted to ask for small headcanons myself

Sniper, Scout and Pauling discovers that reader is a vampire! How will they react?

Reader can be any pronounce you want. You can do romantic or platonic, whatever is comfortable with you!

-💀🌌

→With a vampire!Reader!

Genre: fluff, a lil silly

Characters: Sniper, Scout, and Pauling Warning: canon typical gore.

I love love love this request, thank you so much! This was kind of a hard prompt to get ideas for for some reason. Also I’ve actually never written for Pauling before, let’s hope I get her right!

Sniper

Sniper took note of your gloomy and loner disposition right away.

It’s part of the reason he bothered getting close to you in the first place.

He’s observant so he probably noticed everything separately even if he hadn’t fully put it together yet. Definitely took note of your fangs.

The dislike of garlic, avoiding the sun, never seen eating anything, never seeming flushed or red, your sunken in look, everyone sort of already joked about it.

So he wasn’t all too shocked when you told him.

I honestly imagine he feels pretty threatened by you.

He is generally distrusting of people normally, so you being a night stalking blood drinking beasty doesn’t do much to quell his anxieties.

Couldn’t help but feel intrigued though, can't help but feel compelled by you, even despite his reservations he can't really keep away for long.

The idea of a vampire I feel like would be something he would be very attracted too, the thrill of it all kind of excites him. Of course he doesn't say that, or act on it very often, but you know it anyways.

Idk if this is an out of character headcanon but I highkey think Sniper is a monster fucker.

Supplies you with blood if he sees your low, enjoys how much you brighten after a drink.

Overall finds you very fasicnating, likes learning how to manage life as a vampire

Scout

Scout thinks you're messing with him until the moment he watches you drain the blood from a civilian.

Cautious with the kinds of jokes he makes after that.

He guesses it does kind of make sense in retrospect, you did have a sort of dark air about you.

Honestly finds it so sick, thinks of you as sort of his personal gaurd dog at night, wouldn't say that outloud but internally yes.

He generally would treat you about the same, vampire or not.

If we're talking old timey vampires here finds it hilarious that you can't enter a space without explict permission, will torture you by not inviting you into a room as he walks right through.

Thinks you turning into a bat is one of the coolest things, honestly big jealous vibes from Scout, he wishes he was a big cool vampire too.

It’s a fantasy of his for you to drink some of his blood, is too proud/paranoid to ever say it out loud. But you don’t miss his little sighs as he looks at your fangs.

Secretly dreams of you turning him too, so very secretly.

Pauling

Was honestly so overworked she hardly even noticed.

"Huh? What did you say? Oh yeah, yeah that's nice," she said with a polite nod one day, burying a group of hippies as she did so.

Just enjoys having someone with her during the night, like Scout wouldn't realize you were serious until she sees you feed, once she does it's like a start up noise.

Genuinely uses you as an asset in her work, you turning into a bat and flying is amazing for locating survivors, youre such a big help!

Like I said enjoys the nightly company more than words can describe, she loves quality time.

Really enjoys your darker aesthetic and sometimes thinks you're way too cool to be spending all your time with her.

Will make sure you're always fed, you never have to worry about going hungry while Pauling is around.

If you've been around a few generations wants to hear what life was like before she was around, how it felt to live in a vastly diffrent time period. Finds it so intresting to hear about!

Ohhh boy I hope this is okay anon! Like I said it was kind of hard to think of things to write about for some reason,,, I hope this was good! I had a lot of fun writing it even despite the trouble I had.

[t1ck3t-j3rry]

Just a Quick Break From Work

nsfw under the cut

Kinktober Day 3 - Threesome

read it on ao3!

ship: Miss Pauling/Spy/Reader

tags: AFAB | Assigned Female at Birth Reader-Insert, Threesome - F/F/M, Threesome, Caught, Face-Sitting, Come Eating, Oral Sex, Dick riding, Riding, Stripping, spy's into girl on girl action, Grinding, Making Out, Sloppy Makeouts, Nipples, Nipple Play, Nipple Licking, Tit Sucking, Breasts, Breast fixation, everyone cums, Wet & Messy, Miss Pauling is pent up, POV Second Person, Kinktober, Kinktober 2025

notes: ahh a Pauling/Spy/Reader fic has been on my mind for a WHILE, so glad I finally got around to it!

word count: 1.5k

"Yeah, Scout- I see you- you don't need to continue doing that-" Pauling says as Scout tries to get her attention by doing what he does best. Making a fool out of himself. She's had a long, long day and she's getting pretty sick of it. She's only at the actual physical base because the Administrator thought the teams should interact in person with some people other than the mercenaries. While she's at it she's also giving them their contracts. So far she's checked on Engie, Heavy, Scout, Medic, and Demo. She was just going in order of who she ran into first, or whose room is closer. She checks Scout off her checklist and makes a note on how he seemed to be doing. She looks up as she's writing and realizes she's right in front of Spy's smoking room.

Pauling knocks a couple of times on Spy's door, then comes in without waiting for a response. She's a busy woman! She doesn't have time to wait all day! She's looking down at her clipboard, continuing to write as she speaks, "Spy, I have a job for you. It's important-" She looks up, sees you and Spy on his sofa. Spy's laying down with you sitting on his face, his arms are wrapped around your thighs as he tries to look at Pauling. "Oh God! I'm really sorry guys!" But she doesn't look away from the two of you. Her eyes go to your breasts, then Syp's erection, then back to your chest, Spy picks up on this.

"Care to… join us?" Pauling's face turns red, "Well I'm flattered but I couldn't, I'm very busy-" she cuts herself off "oh who am I kidding, I'd love to. It'll have to be fast though." She puts her clipboard and pen down on Spy's bar. "How delightful…" Spy mutters from underneath your thighs. "You really have the time?" you ask, shocked that she said yes. "Well, no, but it's fine!" She starts stripping for the two of you, her belt, then her shirt, then her shoes, then her skirt. Her nipples are a good size, not too big and not too small. She has a slight bush, it's not super hairy but she's also probably never shaved it. Plus she has a really cute ass.

Your pussy starts getting even more wet than it already was, she might be the most gorgeous girl you've ever seen. And Spy notices what it's doing to you, "You're really enjoying this, hm?" "Oh shut up, like you aren't too." "I never said I wasn't" Pauling is quite flattered by this, "You guys really don't mind me joining in?" You and Spy both quickly respond at the same time, basically both saying that you don't mind and would love it if she joined. Pauling walks over and sits on Spy's stomach, still wearing her tights. She hasn't gotten wet just yet, just a tingly feeling in her groin.

You reach one of your hands out and knead her teat gently, making her sigh quietly. Her right hand grips your waist, her manicured nails scratching your skin slightly. She leans in for a kiss and you almost immediately reciprocate it. Her lips are slightly dry and she's a messy kisser but it still felt so good, and not just because Spy has started to eat you out again. Pauling's cat eye glasses are jamming against your face rather uncomfortably, so before you slip your tongue into her mouth you take them off of her. Setting them down… somewhere on Spy's body, you're not really paying attention to where. Pauling's left hand goes to the back of your head, gripping onto your hair for support.

During this Spy is nose deep in your cunt as you grind against him, eating you out like he's been starved for years. His length is twitching slightly against Pauling's cheeks, she was so close to being inside him but wasn't. He's slightly disappointed by this, but two beautiful women are on top of him so he's not really in the complaining mood. His tongue flicks against your clit, he's trying to focus on pleasing you but he can't help but also try to look at what you and Pauling are doing. Two women having sex does stuff to him, and he'd be lying if he said he'd never thought of you two specifically being together.

Pauling pulls away from you slightly, a string of spit connecting your mouths. Her head goes down to your neck, kissing and sucking at it. She's starting to get wetter now, grinding gently against Spy as he groans against you. This felt like heaven for all of you. Your hands grip Pauling's hips as her lips trail down to your breasts, sucking your nipples. This and Spy beneath you was making you pretty overstimulated and you wanted to cum, since you and Spy were going at it for a good while before Pauling joined in.

So, with a loud moan coming from you, you climax all over Spy's face. Feeling sensitive, you stop grinding, but Spy doesn't stop lapping up your juices straight from the source. "S-spy… slow down…" He listens to you obediently, but he doesn't fully stop. He whimpers out something in French. Pauling pulls away from your breast, sinking herself onto Spy's cock. He continues whimpering, getting used to how she feels. "Pauling… you feel divine, both of you do." He thinks the only person that could make this even better was Scout's Mom, but he didn't want to get too greedy.

Pauling was very wet now, seeing you cum on Spy is so hot to her. She felt slightly honored to be experiencing this, two people she thinks are attractive wanted her of all people to join them. She starts moving up and down on his cock, it's such a relief for him because his sex hasn't gotten almost any attention this whole time. She then goes back to your chest, fondling one of your tits as she suckles the other one. She fantasized about this so often in the past, she couldn't believe it was actually happening. Spit dribbles from her mouth and down your torso as she moans your name.

You want to please her too so you grab both of her breasts, your thumbs rubbing over her nipples. She moans more when you do that so you take one between two of your fingers and gently play with it, making her eyes roll back. The mix of that and Spy thrusting into her was making her see stars. Spy keeps trying to please both of you, his tongue deep in you, skillfully pleasuring you. He can basically only smell your scent, being that his nose is smothered in you. His member is feeling so sensitive, Pauling is so tight around it and she takes it very, very well.

It keeps pressing against her g-spot with each thrust, making her legs feel weak. Your movements with her teats are making her shiver with pleasure, juices dripping out onto Spy's length. The room is so hot, filling with each of your body's heat and your moans. Your noises combined are pretty loud, so the other mercs could almost definitely hear you. It's not like any of you care though, this felt too good to care. Pauling loves the taste and especially the feeling of how your nipples feel in her mouth, she'll give both of your nipples attention, going from one to the other. Soon enough she's finishing too, her cum paints Spy's length and gets all in her pubes. She's shaking from the orgasm and pulls away from your chest, but doesn't get off of spy.

He was getting close to finishing too, so he pulls out of her and with a groan he cums. Most of his seed lands on his stomach, some of it gets on your thighs. He pulls his head out from between your legs to look at the scene clearer. "Oh merde…" All three of you are breathing heavily, the room is silent besides that. Until Pauling speaks up, "That was so hot. I'd love to go for round two but I'm probably off schedule now." She takes her glasses that now have Spy's seed on it, wipes them off, and puts them back on.

You're now getting off of Spy, he felt so light after having two people on top of him. All of you are getting cleaned up and putting your clothes back on. Pauling grabs her clipboard and says goodbye before she leaves the room. Her legs are still pretty shakey. She Checks you and Spy off her list, noting that you and him were "hanging out" and having a good time. She walks away from his room, and sees another merc she hasn't checked on yet. "Oh! hey Pyro! How are you doing? Burn anything recently?" Her heat is still throbbing, she hasn't came like that in a long, long time.

[queerfortress2]

pls ms pauling anything pleaseim gay im desprate im begging 😭

FINALLY PAULING ASK HELLO HI. i too, am gay and desperate. - mod medic

FEM!READER X PAULING ; GENERAL HEADCANONS

she is TRYING to use all her time off to spend time with you. keyword: try. she gets one day off a year the girl is TRYING HER BEST. but please do not expect her to be around very often. most certainly not during the day but every other night she’ll (break in) walk in to your apartment for a small at home date!

she 100% prioritises work over her own health and sanity so she does have to work on that a bit. i mean we saw in the comics she almost DIED because the administrator needed some australium (THAT SHE KNEW RAN DRY) so like. she has to work on that before really being able to take care of you as well.

what’s that? wanna pamper her? GOOD LUCK SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO TAKE THAT. i personally don’t think she can take gifts very well and will often assume you want something in return. in which she’s now scrambling to go GET something in return.

ideal date where you want to go outside? help her go throw bodies into the cave of teufort.

JOKES ASIDE, if you aren’t fucking crazy, she best place she can take you is to a diner that doesn’t close till midnight. you two are the only customers there and it is very awkward but she’s trying her very best to make it nice! maybe a late night walk back to your place (because she barely is actually in her own, i imagine it’s a mess) and watching old tapes. it’s cute. it’s comfy. it’s non murderous!

if you’re a mercenary? well, it gets a LOT EASIER. hello (probably) only female merc. you’re subjected to girls night. when not actively running and disposing of bodies she’s probably talking to you, maybe while on the phone or dealing with paperwork but i digress.

think her biggest thing is gift giving and acts of service. she can’t exactly GIVE quality time if she tried, and shes so terribly touch starved that i don’t know how she would react if you just laid on top of her. she can give words of affirmation and such but she’s not exactly good at it. just trust me she’s going to be giving more than she expects to receive.

LOOK SHES SO SAD HOW DO I MAKE HER HAVE A HAPPY LITTLE RELATIONSHIP

i’m trying

[puerileaccismus]

Okey. Pauling x Inspector!Reader where you work as an inspector/whistleblower for OSHA. Maybe enemies to lovers. Maybe you're secretly trying to get Mann co shut down. Maybe you're the one who got Pauling her state mandated holiday idk.

[rays-tf2-space]

Miss Pauling s/o Headcanons That Slowly Devolve Into No Specific Order

Doesn’t even notice your crush on her at first, at all

Too busy to even think about love, unless it’s friendship [Since she does have friends]

Terrible at sorting out her own emotions since she barely makes time for herself thanks to the Administrator so when she does eventually fall for you, she can’t tell if it’s just infatuation, admiration, platonic love, or love love

Eventually she figures it out

Either she will make it crystal clear she likes you first by being up front and blunt, or will wait until she knows for sure you feel the same

When dating, at first she’ll put work above having a relationship

So your dates are most likely just accompanying her on missions or her never showing up to reservation dates at restaurants or movies

But she’ll notice and appreciate just how patient and loyal you are with her

Eventually she’ll start focusing less on work once she realizes there’s more to life than running errands and pay you more attention and doesn’t mind being a couple minutes late to do things for the Administrator

Is still very work oriented but begins to make more time for you basically

When it comes to physical affections like hugging, cuddling, hand holding, wholesome stuff like that, literally is as stiff as a board

Becomes more used to it though once the initial shock goes away and returns the actions

Her love language is definitely words of affirmation and gift giving since she doesn’t have much time for quality time

She’s just a bit awkward since she doesn’t date often

Definitely has a heart attack if you two were watching a movie and you fall asleep on her shoulder or lap

Probably would absent-mindedly start playing with your hair if you fall asleep near her

Doesn’t really call you any couples nicknames, maybe occasionally a basic ‘honey’ or ‘love’ but not commonly

Absolutely adores anything you do for her

Since she’s used to doing everything herself and being independent

Since she’s always out and about, she definitely loves coming home to a homemade meal

Also appreciates if you pack her snacks

If you are in any danger she will definitely fight tooth and nail for you

If the Administrator were to put you in danger she sure as hell is going to stand up for you/fight for you

Basically you got a badass gf who’s a big dork outside of fighting and work

And I believe that’s all for now ✨

[doopy-n-loopy]

Yan!TF2 × reader headcannons (SFW and NSFW)

// obsessive tendancies, mentions of violence, blood, sexual themes, noncon

[SFW]

Let's start with the defense classes

Defense:

Demoman

Deffo didn't admit that he loved you

Tbh he probably blamed it on his drunkenness

But dude you're always drunk

I mean seriously if he sobers up he'll genuinely die so like-

He would usually drink with you or just around you if you don't drink

He's generally a fun chill guy to be with

He would watch you from a distance at times, especially during battle you might distract the cyclops

He's okay with you asking questions

One time he broke his eyepatch and needed a new one

You gave him a nice black eyepatch with the demoman emblem on it

He gets all red whenever you say his full name, because he knows you remembered it

He is generally against kidnapping, I mean especially since he lives with his ma he'd rather not

And because he's a gentleman

If you ever reciprocate his feelings he'll make sure to treat you right

He is a messy person but for you? He'll clean

Probably would get carried away and make home made bombs with all the cleaning supplies 🤦‍♂️

Takes you to meet his mom

"ooo Tavish, yer gonna get me some grand kiddos are ya?"

That made you both blush like crazy

Soft cheek kisses

Probably made a special bomb and named it after you

"this one's for you, luv!" *Proceeds to set off all stickybombs which blows up the entire enemy team*

Blew up the last guy who looked at you funny

Hell, even worse when they make a sexual remark to you scout probably did it

Likes to give you your space but when he's paranoid he follows you to wherever or watched you from a distance

Heavy

Two words: big boy

Hugs are 10000000000/10

Sometimes it fewls suffocating but man it's like hugging a cloud

Soft forehead kisses

Russian pet names

He sometimes lets you touch Sasha, that's how he knows he loves you because he doesn't even let medic, his best friend, touch her

Probably named a gun after you or one of the pet names he calls you

You definitely met his family and they loved you

Zana especially

Doesn't get jealous easily but will not hesitate to unload 12 pounds of bullets into someone who even LOOKS at you the wrong way

Lord have mercy on the ones who dare flirt with you, rest in pieces scout

Doesn't really follow you anywhere (you're a bit too fast for him) but he does watch you and check up on you

He preforms okay on the battlefield but when you're around, he'll show off

Will cook for you, mainly russian dishes

He's very against kidnapping and would rather not do it

Doesn't shut up about you when he's around medic

Engineer

F l u f f y

Very softspoken in general but he gets all flustered when you talk to him

Will check up on you occasionally

"Darlin'" "Honey bunny" things like that y'know

Huge smile when you're around

Will cook for you most definitely, knows what you like

Makes little robots for you

Likes seeing you use his dispenser

Doesn't get jealous easily either but will try and take you away from someone who wants your attention

Likes just having you in his presence, doesn't need to talk to be happy with you around

Very very against kidnapping like all other defense classes, wouldn't do it unless if he truly felt the need to, last resort kind of thing

The last guy who flirted with you had a sentry gun shoved up his ass

Doesn't really follow you anywhere

Offense:

Scout

Nothing short of a horomonal teenager

I mean he's 21 but

He gets so giddy around you, very loud, tries to show off

He loves you very much

"oh yeah? Well I once absolutely smashed a guy into peices, he was still screaming when he was dead!"

He brags about brutal things but hey you love it since you're also brutal

Flexes his non-existent muscles around you

Would talk about his mom to you all day

Definitely got a tattoo of your face and name somewhere on his body, most likely his bicep

Your name is probably misspelled too but you never say anything about it because he can't read so it's fine

He hasn't really thought about kidnapping in all honesty, again, a last resort kinda thing if he can't get you to love him

He will make a damn SCENE if anyone flirts with you

"you think that's funny, chucklenuts? I eat guys like you for breakfast lunch AND dinner!" "I'll blow yer freakin head off if ya talk to y/n like that again!" Would definitely drag you away

God help anyone that makes you uncomfortable, he'll fuck them up, if that person is medic I mean he'll try to but we all know how fucking scary medic is

Follows you at times

Pyro

"Mphmphmpph"

Seems more lovey around you

Definitely gave you a hand full of the enemy's bloody bones thinking it was a bouquet of flowers

Absolute baby

Just so precious, scary but precious

Hugs for days

Good luck trying to get their ass off of you when you're on cease-fire

Very warm though, they smell like smoke with a bit of blood

Likes petting you

Isn't against the idea of kidnap because they don't realize what they're actually doing, they think they're just taking you to a magical place

Snuggles

When someone flirts with you their whole world changes

Gets angry and starts yelling at them

"MPHMPHMOHMPHHH! MPHMPHNHUMAHUMA!" - Pyro 2021

Will not let you get a checkup alone, he trusts medic but not with you

Very sweet tho, he'll turn around when you need to strip down

Will follow you almost EVERYWHERE and if they can, while holding your hand

Soldier

Yells at you a little less than the others

At first doesn't realize how he feels but then realizes that he loves you

Is pretty protective over you

Rants about America all day to you

Probably got you an american flag to wear

Doesn't really take off his helmet but he likes seeing you in it, makes him proud

If you ever live with him you'll find out that he owns like 20 racoons

"YOU ARE CUTER THAN A RACOON" "YOU WILL BE SAFE ON THE BATTLEFIELD, DO YOU HEAR ME MAGGOT?"

He loudly wakes everyone up in the morning but tries to avoid waking you up

Loves you as much as he loves America

Will show off on the battlefield for you

Isn't against kidnapping you, he probably did it early on if you showed immediately that you didn't reciprocate his feelings

Will blow any guy that hits on you to absolute bits

"MAGGOT DO YOU HEAR ME? YOU WILL LEAVE THE LADY/MAN ALONE THIS INSTANT!"

Probably put you on his back and rocket jumped just to show you what it felt like

Follows you around a lot, it's really obvious because he wears a bucket over his head and crashes into things, when you look back he'll stand behind a lamp post or somewhere really obvious

Support

Ah yes, everyones favorite class including mine

Sniper

Very quiet

Takes secret glances at you

Pays more attention to you than the others

S h y

Asks how you are, how you slept, etc

Doesn't really need to be holding you, tbh he's against PDA

But he likes being in your presence

Just sit down next to him and he'll be fine

When he's on the battlefield, he'll look for you and make sure you're safe

God forbid anyone try to hurt you, he'll make them suffer

Talks about Australia to you and accidentally admitted that he wanted to take you there

Doesn't like the idea of kidnapping but he isn't totally against it, I can see him doing it

He smuggled you all the damn way to Australia

He'll nonchalantly show off to you on the battlefield, he'll let you get cornered and come in to save the day

"love" is a word he uses a lot with you

Will grumble to himself if he sees someone flirting with you

If it's a random person, well, that'll be the last time you ever see them

Has talked about you to his parents

Kind of follows you? I mean he sits atop a high placeand watches you through his scope whenever you're going somewhere

Spy

SEDUCTIVE ASF

He knows what he's doing

Will kiss your hand a lot

Likes to flirt with you and see you blush

"honhonhon"

Sleazy french fucker

Watched you from afar at first then approached you a little later

Isn't against the idea of kidnapping, pro kidnapping, definitely did it not only to have you to himself but for some sort of sexual satisfaction

Just very uh... Lewd? Can't find the right word

He treats you very respectfully though

If he hears anyone else flirting with you he'll be fuming but won't show it

"Oh please, like you could EVER satisfy y/n's desires"

That person mysteriously disappeared that night

Very cocky bastard

Definetly follows you home, not only that but he watches you through your window

And stalks you

He knows everything about you

Would get you either by knocking you unconscious or by blackmailing you

Medic

B a s t a r d

Gets LOUD when you're around

And giddy

Very touchy, always has a reason to put his hands on you

Talks a lot with you around, I mean he already talks a lot but now he won't shut up

Keeps his office nice and clean for you

He restocks on everything so when you come around you can take a loot at all his medicines

Big smile :D

Like spy he is not at all against kidnapping you

Makes sure you're comfortable during checkups

Will make you wait to be seen last just so he can take his time touching your body

"it's all part of the procedure".mp3

Compliments you in weird ways, ex: "your skin is so smooth and lovely, it's the perfect texture to make leather out of" "you have an amazing colon"

Look he's just trying his best here he has a screw loose

You're the only member who he's careful with really

Sometimes allows you to get hurt or has you get hurt by something just so you can see him

Always follows you wherever

Knows everything about you

If someone is flirting with you, he'll get quiet at first and use a low tone to speak to them

"you have guts talking to y/n like that"

They were never seen again

With kidnapping, he won't hesitate to use blackmail against you, or will just use anesthesia

Bonus: Pauling

Pauling

This lady values her work over her life, but to her you're so much more important

Will call you a lot on the battlefield to check in on you

Won't give you extremely hard missons to do because she doesn't want you to get hurt

"Hey (class), Pauling here. I need you... No not like that I just- I mean- for a mission yeah a mission"

Gets all flustered when you're around

Will take her only day off to spend time with you, what a sweetheart

Keeps multiple tabs on you

Follows you around

Doesn't really have time for kidnapping

But if it comes to that, she'll make something up so she has a reason to kidnap you

If anyone else is flirting with you she won't show that she's annoyed

She'll make something up as an excuse to execute them

[NSFW]

Defense

Demo

Has definitely thought of what you'd look like while naked

B l u s h

Has used a mental image of you to get off before

Probably has an actual photo of you

When he drinks a little more than usual, he'll accidentally brush his hand against your ass or get touchy with you

Will not force himself on you, he's 100% against that

If you decide to have sex with him, praise is what you're gonna get

"you're as beautiful as a shot of whiskey in the sunrise"

Very gentle with his hands

Heavy

Not the type to masturbate

Unless if he gets THAT worked up

Again, against forcing himself on you

But if you want it no doubt you will top

He's also gentle with you

And loving

Praise is all you're gonna get

Sometimes russian sometimes broken english

Either way he will worship your body

Engi

Again, a more modest guy, doesn't really touch himself

Might just use a robot to pleasure himself when thinking about you

Probably has a photo of you and him around his workshop

Never forces himself on you

He's sweet and gentle when you do want it though

Sometimes gets help from his robot friends

Offense

Scout

Gets off on thinking about you

Won't force himself on you though

Sexual remarks × 100

Calls you handsome/beautiful in bed

I wouldn't say he's the best in bed but hey he's good I guess

Cuddles after sex most likely

Probablh threw out all his sexual magazines because they just didn't do the trick anymore

Sometimes when he runs past you, your shirt/skirt gets lifted up by a gust of wind and he can't help but look ( ͡◉ ͜ ʖ ͡◉)

Since I hit the text limit, I'll be making a part 2, stay tuned

[thedevilsruby]

Proposition (Male!reader x Miss Pauling)

(Warning, NSFW)

You chuckled as you sipped your coffee. You always enjoyed these little get togethers with Miss Pauling. It was nice to see her smile after seeing her look so exhausted all the time.

“It was so epic!" Miss Pauling laughed. "Sounds like it." You said. "Hey, Y/n?" she asked, looking at you. "Yes?" you asked.

 "I...don't mean to pry but..." She leaned in and whispered, "I hear you're a virgin..."

You choked on your coffee, coughing and spluttering. "Who told you that?!" you hissed back as you cleaned yourself up. "Scout..." she muttered. "Damn it, Scout, I'll kill you!" You growled.

“But...I want to help you fix it." Miss Pauling said, casually stirring more creamer into her coffee.

Wait, What?

“Say again?” You asked, unsure of what you just heard.

“Here’s my proposition.” she said, sipping her coffee.  “You take me out to a nice dinner, and I’ll help you fix your “problem.”“ She smirked.

"Wait you mean...like a date?" You asked.

 "Isn't it courtesy to take a lady out on a date before you sleep with her?" She asked as if it wasn't the most ridiculous thing that's come out of her mouth.

“Uh...” You were hesitant on what to do. You liked Miss Pauling and enjoyed her company, but you worried about how this would make things.

“This won’t make it awkward between us? Our professional relationship stays the same?” You asked.

“Of course. Don’t worry, this won’t make things awkward. Do you accept or not?” Miss Pauling asked.

You bit your lip but nodded. “I accept your proposition, Miss Pauling.” You said.

“Good. See you tonight.”

---

Dinner went smoothly. You had a medium steak with a small salad and a draft beer. She had chicken parmesan with garlic breadsticks and wine. You talked about all sorts of things and laughed over stupid subjects.

It felt natural. 

“Now shall we go back to your place for dessert?” Miss Pauling asked softly.

Your cheeks heated up for what was coming. 

---

She shoved you against your bedroom wall and kissed you heatedly. You kissed back.

She stripped you of your shirt while you toyed with the zipper on the back of her dress. “Miss Pauling...” You whispered.

“Y/n...” She hissed as you pulled her dress off her shoulders, letting it fall to her feet. she stepped out of it and you blushed at the sight of her matching white lace bra and underwear. Did she know this would happen?

Whatever. It looked amazing on her.

She kneeled down, pulling at your pants and boxers. she gasped quietly as your member sprang out freely. “Wow...” She whispered, clearly impressed at how hard you already were. 

You reached down and unhooked her bra, tossing it to the side. You massaged her breasts, eliciting a moan from her. 

“Y/n...” she whimpered. “Stand up.” You commanded. She obeyed and you tugged at her underwear, peeling them off and letting her step out of them tossing them on top of her bra.

You then got daring and rubbed her clit, making her gasp and hiss in pleasure. “My my, so wet already.” You murmured.

You slid a finger into her, making her moan again. “Oh god, Y/n!” she said. You added another and started pumping, she threw her head back.

“Don’t tease, you know what I want!” she breathed.

“Do I?” you asked innocently as you pulled your fingers out and laid her on your bed.

“I want your cock.” She says, almost whining.

You kissed her again. “As you wish.” You said gentlemanly. 

You slid into her. God, that feels amazing.

“Oh my god, Pauling.” You hissed.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” she asked, putting her hand on your cheek.

“Hell yes.” You sigh, then look at her, wanting to make sure she’s ok.

“I’m fine. Move.” She commands.

You heeded her and started to thrust, both of you moaning in ecstasy.

“Y/n!”

“Pauling!”

It takes about 15 minutes for both of you to finish, screaming each other’s names. You collapse next to her, panting hard.

She chuckles as she pulls the blanket over you and cuddles you. 

“Congratulations, you’re no longer a virgin.” She says, kissing your cheek. 

“You should make more propositions with me.” You chuckled.

“How about a proposition next week?”

“You’re on.”

--

This was a request done for my friend! He really wanted something with Miss Pauling so here it is!

I hope you all enjoyed it!