18+, MDNI
Object! Gojo crack fic inspired by and written for the beautifully unhinged writing event prompt where Gojo is reincarnated as random objects by the ever talented @madamechrissy ✨️ Go give her some love !!! ♡
Summary
Boyfriend!Gojo met an untimely demise and, surely due to a mix up, he's been reincarnated as the handrailing in a public mall bathroom! As the existential horror of his situation sets in and Satoru is sure he's going to lose his mind, a beacon of shining hope kicks in the door in the form of his past lovers snagging a quickie and using him for support! Will you two notice and finally save him from this hell? Or will this really be his new devastating eternity?
Crack fic for @madamechrissy 's Object!Gojo writing event celebrating her birthday and 50k followers ! Belated Happy Birthday, Happy Mother's Day, and Congratulations!!! <3 Thank you for all your beautiful work! :)
Starring - Bathroom stall railing!Gojo (boyfriend!Gojo), partner!Reader, and boyfriend!Geto
First ever fic, first ever tumblr post! Posted from mobile so I am so sorry in advance lol
Smut, fluff, angst, crack, existential dread
CW/TW:
quick mention of drug use and death ♡ no curses au ♡ GN!ish reader? maybe leaning feminine? ♡ reader and Suguru use him to hook up ♡ past SatoSugu/Reader ♡ Geto/Reader/cuck Gojo, kind of? ♡ semi descriptive smut ♡ poly relationship ♡ over use of parentheses and commas ♡ regular Show song reference ♡ no Digimon cards harmed in the making of this fic
open ending
I'm sorry Gojo and everyone ily I swear ♡
Railed Under the Bathroom Lights
By Me, Mickey, hi :) ! @wthdoesthathave2dowithme
Satoru wants to scream.
Not that it would do any good.
He had never given much thought to his afterlife. Growing up, his family never really worshipped anyone but themselves. Satoru Gojo, as most young adults do, considered himself untouchable. Borderline invincible. He was the Satoru Gojo, hello! He was busy living his best life! Partying, inventing new positions to keep his partners in, and loving the people he chose to surround himself with is just good ol' self care. Why would he worry about something as trivial and far off as his own demise, let alone where he would end up after that?
And who in their right mind would've ever thought he'd die from something as sudden as getting hit by a runaway ice cream truck while on a nice summer stroll? Not his favorite way to get hit from behind, to be honest.
The bigger shock Satoru had to overcome was not his untimely demise or even the tragic ridiculousness of how his death came about but where he's found himself now.
As a handrailing in the stall of the family bathroom at what used to be his favorite mall to visit with his friends.
He's unclear on the mechanics of his current situation. Satoru is not quite sure if he's a ghost trapped in the railing or the railing itself. He's not even sure what the relevance of this railing would be to him or why he's here of all places. He does know that while no one can hear him he can see everything in the general vicinity and feel when he's being utilized. He doesn't get hungry, though he really misses eating. And he doesn't need sleep but he wishes he could just to escape this waking nightmare, at least for a little while. He's definitely not pleased about it. Satoru appears to be trapped in some horrific limbo of existence. He's spent what feels like years, no eons!, questioning the whys and hows and logistics of it all. He's not sure about a lot of things but he is sure this is his own personal hell.
At first Satoru was understandably devastated. What did he do to deserve this outcome? Certainly nothing to do with his lifetime of debauchery. He did what anyone would agree is the totally normal amount of hedonism.There has to be some kind of misunderstanding! Where were his friends ? Where were you and Suguru? Were you all alright? Did any of you miss him? How much time had passed already? How would h- could he even get out of here ? How much overly scented "tropical island" air freshener was someone really allowed to spray in here before it became a combustion risk?
Time passed in an agonizing, immeasurable expanse. His questions remained unanswered. The same eight to ten mid-ass Top Summer Hits™️ radio songs and ads playing in a never ending loop over the speakers.
🎶It's summertime and you know what that means🎶
Satoru eventually tried to come to terms his new life. Some days were better than others, of course. He'd seen people come and go, a few really needed him and some worked hard to avoid touching him at all costs. He tried to appreciate being able to help people in any small way. He'd always squeeze his eyes shut once anyone's pants came off but he'd certainly judge them based off the condition they left the stall in and whether or not they cleaned their hands after.
He witnessed positive pregnancy tests and morning sickness with people gripping him for support through it, parents trying to pee whilst also wrangling their exuberant children and desperately demanding they keep their hands on the rail until they've finished, exhausted mall employees needing a moment to recover their customer service faces and resting an elbow on him while they hit their vape and tried to frantically disperse the strawberry mango flavored cloud, the occasional business man doing a quick line off of the cool steel and leaving Satoru feeling a little edgier that day, or any variety of wheelchair or cane users who relied on him for a safer bathroom experience.
And a few hookups, of course.
Which always left him mourning. And a little horny.
Satoru sighs mournfully. He'd always think of you two.
The loves of his cut too short life. Best friends to lovers from high school on into your adulthood. You three had had your share of bathroom stall goofabouts. When tensions were so high you just couldn't wait until you got home and it didn't matter how icky the environment around you was. How alive he felt when it was just the three of you. He thought about you and Suguru often. He thought about all of his friends and wondered if any of you still came to this mall or if it hurt too much. Hell, he wondered if it was even the same lifetime he left, really. He wasnt sure. But he knew he missed your contagious laugh and Suguru's hard earned smile. He missed stealing sweets from Haibara, even Nanami's stern glares and Utahime's chastising lectures, and the smell of Shoko's cigarettes. He missed kikufuku. Those kinds of days always renewed his determination to find a way out of this godforsaken stall and back to you but without even the smallest amount of progress. He glared into the nothing of the empty bathroom.
🎶Gonna head down to the beach, gonna do some beachy things🎶
"Ah, no," he groaned, pathetically. "Not this song again." He started humming along with the tune anyway. He was stuck. Probably forever. It was a dark place to be.
Then there was light. The bathroom door slammed open disrupting the black of the empty bathroom and the droll of the torturous, yet catchy song that was playing again. Sounds of the lively atmosphere from the mall crescendoing for a moment before returning to the usual muffled background Satoru had grown accustomed to as the door was quickly closed once more. Automatic lights flicked on with promise and the lock on the door clicked loudly into place. An all too familiar and warm giggle flooded the bathroom bringing with it sounds of soft panting and frenzied kissing. It all slammed into Satoru like the cold truck that killed him. No way! Satoru wished he could move, he needed to see for himself. He tried again to gain any semblance of control, even the tiniest bit of wiggle, but was met with the same as always immovable cold steel screwed into the wall that he was. The bathroom stall door was carelessly flung into the wall and Satoru was finally, beautifully, graced with seeing the (just as alluring as his memory provided) back of you and glued to your front was none other than his beloved Suguru.
Your arms around his neck, fingers tangled messily in his long, silky locks pulling it loose from the half bun he was known to keep it in. He kicked the stall door shut and you pressed him tight against it making him groan as you tugged a little harshly on the dark hair in your grip. The tall and lean man(damn, someone's been heavylifting) used one hand to flip the latch, locking it. Suguru gracefully walked you backwards, grabbing generous handfuls of your ass and thighs and dipping his fingers in and out of your waistband. Soft whimpers and groans spilling from each of you. He pressed you back against the wall and rested your ass up against none other than Satoru, the hand railing.
You were both breathing heavily and Satoru was in a momentary state of shock. So many things screamed through his mind at once.
It really was you !! And you were touching him! You were finally here! But not to rescue him?
SHIT, neither of you probably even know he's here! You two don't look sad at all! Do you not miss him ? Did he not matter to either of you in the slightest? Are you both happier without him?
Suguru's hair is a bit longer , fuck, it looks really good on him. And you, oh hell, you sound just as pretty as you always did when you start begging into Suguru's kisses. He misses you both so much. He loves you still, don't you two still love him?
Satoru wants to scream at you two, or really, he'd rather make you two scream for him. Your pretty ass sitting deliciously warm on his cold metal while Suguru presses himself between your legs. Then Satoru could feel both of you and, oh fuck, it was driving him crazy. FUCK, he missed his hands. And his dick. This is definitely hell if he can get this turned on with no way (that he's discovered) to get off (and trust, he's tried). He couldn't even get your attention!
Still, it was sweet music to his ears when Suguru's purring voice, slightly gruff with need, commands you to turn around and grip the railing with your hands. You do so with enthusiasm, still following directions impeccably. You always were so eager to please for them. Suguru's talented fingers working you open in the skilled way he knew how with years of experience making you cum under his belt. *wink, wink* When your hands grip Satoru his heart swells violently at the feeling. He takes in your heated gaze and the cruel way you're biting down on your lip with his own devastating eyes. He's painfully aroused when once again met with the blatant need on your angelic face and your pitiful attempts to stay quiet. Satoru wants to mock you, just a little. Just the way he often daydreamed about when he used to bully you in tandem with Suguru making your eyes roll back a little harder. His memory hardly did the real sight justice. Satoru frantically tries to pour all his desperation, his devotion, and love, and longing into that minimal contact.
You freeze for a second, eyes snapping open, and you look down. For a fleeting moment Satoru swears you're looking at him. The real him. And for that single breath he nearly bursts with hope so intense he thinks he'll suffocate. Your eyes well up suddenly and you sniffle. Suguru immediately pauses his ministrations.
"Are you okay?" His velvet voice full of concern, eyebrows knitting together. He stands you back up and spins you to face him. Satoru wails at the loss of contact, shattering his momentarily belief he was getting through to you. "Do we need to stop? Did som-"
"No! Sorry! Sorry, I'm fine!" you choke out. Waving off his mounting worry with a watery smile. You give a half hearted laugh, a little out of breath.
"It's just," you swallow thickly. "I miss him." You meet Suguru's stunning amethysts and a few tears escape down your lashes. He immediately pulls you in tight and cradles your head against his chest, tucking you under his chin.
"I know sweetheart," he sighs. "I do too." His tone reassuring but a little strained with tears of his own he's holding back. Satoru knew the sound all too well, Suguru always was trying to be stronger than he should have to be. Both of you sympathy criers in the first place. It would normally be funny, Satoru thought, to see you with your panties around your knees and Suguru with a raging hard on while both of you are weeping gently. It might be funny, if Satoru wasn't an infuriatingly horny, sobbing, hopeless mess right now himself.
"That idiot would've loved another bathroom stall quickie." Your shaky voice muffled out into his, now slightly damp, shirt. "And he would've hated this fucking air freshener." Suguru chuckled into your hair.
"Yeah, it's not great." He wrinkled his nose in agreement. An easy, gentle smile still gracing his features. "I'm sure he's somewhere pissing everyone off, eating his weight in mochi, and waiting on us for more depraved hookups some day." He soothed warmly. Suguru pulled your gaze up to meet his with a gentle finger under your chin and carefully brushed the tears from your cheeks. "We'll see him again, I promise."
You pulled Suguru back in and comforted one another with a deep kiss. Satoru watched with a bittersweet broken heart. He wanted to touch you, he wanted to be the one to promise you two everything would be okay. To kiss the worry from Suguru's brow and soothe the tension from your shoulders with warm hands. Just as he always had. He wanted to be the reason you cried from laughter, from happiness, from pleasure! Not the pain of losing him.
At the same time Satoru told himself he was brought some semblance of peace. You two still missed him, still loved him, still mourned him in your most intimate moments. He was consoled just a bit watching you two lean on each other. At least you weren't alone. At least you were still surrounded in love. Maybe, maybe, he could exist with that. You two were safe and you had each other. He hoped desperately Suguru was right and you would all hold one another again some day. What if you both got stuck here with him? Of course, Satoru would never wish this curse on either of you. No matter how lonely he felt but he couldn't stop the brief thought that you'd make a pretty sexy paper towel dispenser, oo! or the glass in the lighting above him. Suguru would be the perfect tile on the walls. Satoru was painfully aware of how quickly he had slipped into insanity.
You moaned softly again into Suguru's mouth. He broke the kiss with a breathless, wet laugh.
"Still?" He grinned with feigned surprise. Satoru's own breath caught.
You whipped back around and grabbed Satoru tight again causing him to let out a startled but deeply erotic moan, not that you could hear it. You playfully wiggled your ass a little at Suguru, beckoning him.
"It's what he would've wanted." You teased lightly and Suguru barked out a laugh with you. Satoru beamed an agonized smile hearing you joke, and anyway, you were right. He did want it. He needed to see you both cum again. Suguru huffed out another chuckle before meeting your eyes over your shoulder with a downright sinful gaze. His pupils blown as he took in your slightly bent forward form presenting him with such tempting gift. Satoru would've folded right then and there, if he could. Suguru pulled out his cock (just as gorgeous and girthy as Satoru had remembered it, oh god, he wanted to lick every vein just one more time) giving it a tight squeeze. Your's and Satoru's eyes sparkled. Suguru really was the prettiest man alive.
He lined himself up and quickly slid into you with one deep, slightly mean, thrust that had you both immediately scrambling to muffle your moans. Suguru clamped his hand over your mouth and bit into your shoulder. You supported yourself on the handrail against the brutal pace he set, slightly fogging the stainless steel with your hot grip. Satoru was keening at the sensation, at the softness of your palms, the warmth he so desperately yearned for. Your wails muffled and tears streaming as your emotions came to a peak with your pleasure. Satoru, never one to shut up or miss out, talked you through it as though you could hear him, just as he always had. Praising both of you for your beautiful sounds, how stunning of a job you do taking Sugu's thick cock. How talented Suguru was at pulling such musical notes from your moans, hitting all the right spots and he can tell from how tightly your hands gripped him. How fucking hot you two look. He whispered desperately how much he loves you both and how lucky he is to see you like this. When you dropped and rested your forehead against the cool metal for a moment Satoru kissed it gently. Deeply yearning for his old body to hold you again. Begging for another chance to be kissed back by his lovers' devoted mouths.
You reached the precipice first, screaming into Suguru's steady palm and shaking, clenching down unfairly tight on both him and Satoru. The action had Suguru spilling himself inside the chokehold of your warmth almost immediately and, for the first time since he'd found himself here, Satoru also had the sweet and borderline painful sensation of cumming hard with both of you. He wept at the relief.
Your short breaths mingled and echoed through the now quieter room. The muffled sounds of the mall coming back into focus for a moment. Satoru was, for once, at a loss for words.
🎶It's summertime loOovin, it's lovin in the summer time🎶
"That was," you panted, dazed. "Almost like when-"
"Yeah," Suguru cut you off, saving you from saying the name still too painful to utter, both of you only ever referring to your stolen love with endearing slights. He swallowed and nuzzled into the back of your neck. "Weird place to feel him, right?" You both laughed breathlessly. A few beats later and finally you're standing and moving away from Satoru.
His panic is immediate and formidable. Maybe he was horribly wrong and he couldn't just exist like this. Exist without you two. Satoru tried to scream for you and Suguru. He begged for you to hear him, to see him, to stay, to take him with you.
"Anything! Please! I love you!"
Oblivious, the two of you helped each other clean up and right your clothing. You fixed your jewelry and helped Suguru tie his bun back up, cooing at his beloved, stubborn bang that fell just so. Both of you sharing sweet afterglow kisses completely unaware of the agony imploding behind you.
"Hey," you grinned more than a little mischievously at Suguru making him raise an eyebrow in suspicion. "You wanna go vandalize more of Toru's limited edition Digimon cards again to try and rage bait him into haunting us?"
Suguru broke out in a peal of beautiful laughter while you beamed at the sound. It wasn't lost on him how long it had been since either of you have said that name. It'd been even longer since Satoru had heard it. It sounded heavenly coming from you. Suguru took your hand and kissed your forehead right where Satoru's icy steel had.
"Sure, baby, maybe it'll work this time." You two, casually as you could, left the bathroom rejoining the chaos of the mall crowd smiling and giggling to yourselves.
The bathroom door thudded shut with a heavy finality. The outside chatter muted and your's and Suguru's voices lost among it. The automatic lights clicked off. The dissonance of the same song came through the speakers.
🎶It's summer time loOoving, my baby, why can't you be mine🎶
Left in the dark, once again, Satoru wants to scream.
♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the jjk characters or the regular show song. All rights reserved to their original creators. All rights reserved of this written fanfiction to me, @wthdoesthathave2dowithme , the author, on Tumblr. 2026. Absolutely NO copying, duplicating, or feeding into any Ai platforms.
Thank you. I hope you enjoyed! :)
