todays bird
Show & Tell
Origami Around
Product Placement
RMH
d e v o n
Love Begins
trying on a metaphor
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shark vs the universe
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
macklin celebrini has autism
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
noise dept.
gracie abrams
Sweet Seals For You, Always
PR's Tumblrdome
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@techno-dragon
(Smiling fondly at nothing) puppy music school..... puppy music school.
Even puppy can learn music.
Literally it's puppy music school.
Place: Puppy Music School. Roll d2:
1. Puppies learn to make music
2. Anyone learns how to make puppy music
my kitty used to be homeless. i think she's pretty glad to be in here and not out there.
do what you will but never forget he is fucked up
dont forget;
But never forget.
Like for many people, having to micromanage your every thought and constantly correct and repress "wrong" thoughts and feelings is far more unhealthy than joking about dark subjects - or openly accepting and working with an unpleasant reality - ever could be, but I guess we're all too crazy to be allowed to conclude that something doesn't work for us
"we detected a mature post" yeah I'm in my 30s
Beacause i just like Steve ok?
emoji kitchen is lowkey beautiful guys…
am I doing this right
Important tags
Ambush Alley
Some older Tankmen fanart that I haven't posted before! + bonus art of my Tankmen oc
aren't gorillas gentle giants or something. i stay out of his way, he doesn't maul me, we have a nice time picking out clothes together in opposite sides of the mall
Male gorillas are super aggressive and territorial. Also they interpret nearly every human mannerism as a sign of aggression or a challenge. Smiling and eye contact are both things that zookeepers have to be taught to suppress when they’re in the vicinity of gorillas.
Well unless the mall is his native territory I think I'm fine, I wasn't planning on smiling at him
This is all irrelevant because the obvious answer is five black mambas. I mean, that’s not actually very many snakes, and malls are fucking huge. And unlike a gorilla you can definitely outrun a snake if it does show up. Find an open space in the mall where you can see any snake coming and just hangout out there. Fucking easy.
Misguided! I would much rather have a mallmate I can easily see and hear coming. I'm confident I can stay out of the gorilla's way, but if I step on a snake or one otherwise gets the jump on me, it's all over.
It's not just about the physical danger either, it's about my mental health. One gorilla, unless he's actively mad at me, I just keep a healthy distance between us and make sure I never get trapped. With the snakes, it requires a lot more constant vigilance
They should substitute "chimpanzee" for "gorilla" in this hypothetical.
if it was a chimp i'm taking the fucking snakes
Black mambas have a reputation build on being very venomous and very fast. I'm not sure why you would think you could outrun one (or five) in an enclosed space like a mall.
Malls usually have pretty slick floors, and escalators. I’d choose the gorilla simply because I think that would make an more interesting story (and a better-selling autobiography, I Survived the Mall Gorilla) but I think I’d stand a pretty good chance at avoiding the mamba. They’re fast and aggressive and will chase you but unless we started immediately beside each other I think my sneakers would have the terrain advantage over scutes.
this is too good to leave hidden in the replies
fucking enamored with the implication that this gorilla is fully intelligent but is trying to manufacture plausible deniability like the movie barnyard
elden ring turtle girl
teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek
fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"
