i do think we should normalise being like. platonically enamoured with someone. perhaps i love and admire you dearly and there's nothing romantic about it
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@thatawkwardman
i do think we should normalise being like. platonically enamoured with someone. perhaps i love and admire you dearly and there's nothing romantic about it
THERES MORE TO WHITEWASHING THAN JUST SKIN COLOR THERES MORE TO WHITEWASHING THAN JUST SKIN COLOR THERES MORE TO WHITEWASHING THAN JUST SKIN COLOR THERES MORE TO WHITEWASHING THAN JUST SKIN COLORRRRRRRRRR
Oh boy, a complex character who's a woman! I love messy characters who hurt everyone around them and continue the cycles that hurt them!! Can't wait to share this joy with fellow fans– why's everyone calling her a bitch
pls give me 1(one) reason aces have ever been oppressed, and 1(one) example of aces being a part of lgbt history(before 2004 at least) and then maybe i’ll consider the idea that aces belong in the lgbt community lol
Proof of the existence of asexuals in LGBT+ communities before 2000:
The Golden Orchid association (1644-1949) - a group of women in China that included lesbians, bisexuals, and “women who wanted to avoid both marriage options, and any romantic or sexual partnership” that today we would call asexual or aromantic.
Another Golden Orchid association link (which, interestingly, describes what appears to be a poly relationship).
Personal experience of a queer-identifying person noting that aces were part of the bi community in the 80s and 90s.
A book published in 1999 supports the previous link of someone’s personal experience, and notes that asexuals could be considered part of Kinsey’s “Group 3″ (the bisexuals) because they were “about equally homosexual and heterosexual” and “have no strong preferences for one or the other” just like bisexuals.
Another book that supports the personal experience source by noting that asexuals were considered part of the bisexual “Group 3″, which was published in 1999.
Another post of someone’s personal experiences of asexuals being part of the LGBT+ community in the 90s.
A source from 1999 noting that, while some female-female relationships in the early to mid-twentieth century were obviously lesbian relationships, not all of them were, but that it would be a mistake to label them all “friendships”. It specifically notes that asexual partnered relationships also existed.
This book describes a series of interviews done in 1990 by Catherine Whitney who interviewed heterosexual women married to gay men, and found that they were often asexual. It also describes how, in 1990, Ann Landers (a very popular advice columnist) asked her readers if married couples could enjoy a full life without sex and was flooded with 35,000 responses from people of all ages who had little or no sex and didn’t miss it. It also describes how “Boston marriage” was originally coined with a not-necessarily-always-accurate implication that such a relationship between women was nonsexual, but that later on the assumption was reversed to imply women in a sexual lesbian relationship, and how that caused some women involved in such relationships to hide the asexual nature of their relationships for fear of being called frauds by the larger lesbian community.
This 1997 book that states “To be a Kinsey 3 (bisexual) is to be equally attracted to men and women, i.e. completely bisexual…it is also to be equally unattracted to men and women, i.e. completely asexual. Bisexuality is never about two, only about one – asexual, or self-fulfilling – or three – continuously and equally attracted to both men and women”.
Proof of asexuality being considered as a concrete, distinct orientation before 2000:
One of the first online posts about asexuality in its current use, was made in 1997.
A study on anorexia and bulemia in gay and bisexual men done in 1999 found that 58% of anorexia patients were asexual.
The 1997 Australasian Gay & Lesbian Law Journal mentions asexual as a “relevant sexual identity”.
A 1983 issue of the Journal of Sex Research studied the Mental Health Implications of Sexual Orientation among heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, and asexual people.
The article “Asexuality as Orientation: Some Historical Perspectives” describes different historical studies on asexuality, including a study from Johnson in 1977 where the word asexual was used to describe women “regardless of physical or emotional condition, actual sexual history, and marital status or ideological orientation, [who] seem to prefer not to engage in sexual activity”. It also describes a 1980 study by Storms who included asexual as one of four orientation categories when mapping out sexual orientation. It also describes a 1983 study by Nurius that found out of 685 participants, 5% of males and 10% of females were asexual. It also describes a 1990 study by Berkley et al. that included questions “related to homosexuality, heterosexuality, and asexuality” and included four items (out of 45) that were specific to asexuality.
This book published in 1922 contains a lot of what I personally would describe as narcissism and pseudo-science, but acknowledges asexuality nonetheless: “In addition to the ordinary distinctive males and females, we have asexuals, homosexuals, bisexuals, and old women of both sexes.”
This book from 1996 that notes “A transsexual may have a heterosexual orientation, a homosexual orientation, a bisexual orientation – or an asexual orientation” and clarifies that “a very small number – are asexual or bisexual.”
This book mentions a study by Malyon in 1981 that noted the options available to gay and lesbian teenagers choosing whether, or how, to come out by “[describing] three possible modes of adaptation in adolescence: repression of sexual desire, suppression of homosexual impulses in favor of heterosexual or asexual orientation, or a homosexual disclosure.”
Kinds of oppression that asexuals face:
Eunjung Kim wrote a chapter titled “How Much Sex Is Healthy? The Pleasures of Asexuality” that describes how “the absence of sexual desires, feelings, and activities is seen as abnormal and reflective of poor health” in Western contemporary culture “because of the explicit connection between sexual activeness and healthiness” and argues that “medical explanations of asexuality as an abnormality that has to be corrected constitute a large part of the stigmatization and marginalization experienced by asexual people.” It also discusses the ways in which some groups, specifically Asian American males, that are desexualized can erase the space for asexual Asian American men to simply exist.
Asexuals also face sexual harassment, rape threats, corrective sexual assault, and corrective rape (which, no, is not a lesbian-only term according to actual South Africans) specifically because they are asexual.
There was a recent study by the AAU to identify sexual assault on college campuses, and broke down the responders to their survey by sexual orientation, including asexual. The results clearly show that asexuals are not immune to unwanted sexual contact, stalking, intimate partner violence, or sexual harassment.
A chapter of “Asexualities: Feminist and Queer Perspectives” that notes the specific way that asexual people are talked to/about: “Because asexual difference cannot be iterated in the linguistic field where sex and a sexed position dominate the discourse of sexuality and desire, the asexual subject is linguistically and visually dismantled and reconstructed in the position of a fetish object. This fetishistic conversion happens because the asexual person is made into an image, or spectacle, for consumption.” and “The difference between the unassailable asexual (someone who lacks all of the traits commonly blamed for asexuality such as past history of abuse, disability, etc.) and the spectacular asexual is that while the unassailable asexual allegedly makes asexuality digestible for a skeptical public and presents an accessible image, the spectacular asexual is always consumed as a fetish object, regardless of mental health, ability, and gender.”
The study “Intergroup bias toward “Group X”: Evidence of prejudice, dehumanization, avoidance, and discrimination of asexuals” is exactly what it sounds like. The article’s abstract states: “In two studies (university student and community samples) we examined the extent to which those not desiring sexual activity are viewed negatively by heterosexuals. We provide the first empirical evidence of intergroup bias against asexuals (the so-called “Group X”), a social target evaluated more negatively, viewed as less human, and less valued as contact partners, relative to heterosexuals and other sexual minorities. Heterosexuals were also willing to discriminate against asexuals (matching discrimination against homosexuals). Potential confounds (e.g., bias against singles or unfamiliar groups) were ruled out as explanations.”
The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality describes many issues that asexuals face, including: how asexuality is seen as “invisible” and lends to people thinking it does not exist, how asexuality is actively erased as “unimportant” or not its own identity, the explicitly and implicitly negative messages associated with a lack of sexual attraction, the fear asexuals face when they believe there is something physically or psychologically wrong with them for being asexual, the belief asexuals face about how they must be deeply flawed since they do not conform to other sexual identities, how asexuals face cultural ideologies that sexuality is biologically based and ubiquitous (that all humans possess sexual desire) and that don’t acknowledge asexuality, that to describe oneself as asexual is a statement of moral superiority or purity or failure to find a suitable partner, that asexuality is an immature state they will “grow out of”, that asexuality is a description of action or a preference, that asexuality is unnatural or unhealthy or has to be a symptom of something else, etc.
Asexuality has been shown in the media in a negative light for decades, reflecting the idea that (for various reasons steeped in classism and racism) any woman who wasn’t willing to marry and procreate was a threat to the status quo, as seen in this 1955 book that notes: “Women who did not marry incurred political and social scorn for another reason. The influx of eastern and southern European immigrants in the United States pushed the question into eugenic terms–the wrong people were reproducing. Educated women came primarily from white middle- and upper-class stock, the most desired element by dominant social norms. When these women refused to marry and reproduce, they forced a new concern into the public discourse. it is not a coincidence that the stereotypical asexual unmarried older woman emerged at this time as a source of popular humor.”
Some people in some religions are very explicit about hating asexuals specifically because they are asexual, seeing asexuality as “a perversion akin to homosexuality and bestiality”.
Other religions see asexuals as actually sinful if they choose not to have sex with their spouse.
While not every member of every religion looks down on asexuals, many people in portions of various religions choose to view asexuals negatively.
Some people even recommend asexuals avoid being in a relationship with non-asexuals and assert that “promoting and trying to spread” asexuality, or behaving in an asexual manner, is wrong or unhealthy.
Because of these religious beliefs about asexuality, that also opens up asexuals to discrimination in various legal ways, including (but not limited to) things like the new adoption bill in Texas.
Asexuality was implicitly pathologized until very recently, and even now, the DSM-V states that a diagnosis of HSDD may not be given only if the patient has a preexisting knowledge of asexuality and chooses to ID that way.
TL;DR:
Asexuals have long been considered part of the bisexual community. When people used to talk about bisexuals, it included asexuals because asexuals were the bisexuals too. Bisexual history is asexual history.
Asexuals have also long been considered as a stand-alone orientation that was part of larger non-straight communities and could be studied in comparison to other sexual orientations.
Asexuals face many of the same issues that other marginalized orientations face as well as issues specific to their orientation. These include erasure, medicalization, misidentification, harassment, rape specifically targeted at them for being asexual, and religious intolerance, to name just a few.
None of this is exhaustive. There are more sources to be found and studied.
please reblog this amazing post!!
I have to note as a historian that refusing to marry and have kids has been pretty much frowned on in virtually every society. A few socities had some kind of out, but that usually meant being bound in other ways (being some kind of holy ascetic and cloistered). This pretty much runs from the moment we know anything about any society to the present.,
There’s always been pressure on asexuals to conform to that norm.
Have some photos from the 1970s:
What’s that?
Both of them have signs showing lists of orientations with “Asexual” included?
Gee, but I thought it wasn’t an orientation until 2004!
okay but all things considered, mystreet butchered laurence and garroth so bad. garroth went from strong and silent devoted with all his heart loyal knight to bumbling and pushy and borderline creepy. laurence lost whatever charm he had and just kept the creepy flirting, but in this universe aphmau isn't nearly as open to entertaining his advances & still he can't take a hint. and all their depth as characters is reduced to NOTHING! other characters like aaron, zane, travis, and even katelyn get to keep their hard edges from mcd, though softened to be more appropriate for the setting. but not garrence. gone is garroth's angst with being the son of a corrupt lord, gone is laurence's struggles with having his humanity violently stripped from him and constant wrestling with his shadow knight identity, gone is the fact that both these men sacrificed so much for the people they loved, including aphmau - and the things they did for aphmau, they did it with the understanding that they couldn't (nor did they want to) "force" her to love them back. i kinda feel for the og laurmau/garmau shippers watching early mystreet as it aired and being like "who tf are these guys??" this is most definitely the result of mystreet starting as a light hearted non-canon spinoff of mcd where nothing really mattered, inspired more by shoujo anime than high fantasy, but it would be interesting to see if garroth and laurence get to go beyond goofy sidekicks in the final installment of mystreet.
(this isnt a hate post, just rambling+observations during my mcd s1 rewatch)
joining the war on kids reading any book they want on the side of kids reading any book they want. simply you will be fine. it's even good to be confronted with things you don't understand and even find upsetting, uncomfortable and difficult. it's a surprise tool that will help you later.
prev tags:
literally ok so not a funny story but kind of funny? when I was nine I encountered rape in a book and I was like hey mom what’s this mean and she explained it and I was like oh. gross. and then like two weeks later a girl on the bus abruptly disclosed her csa and we were all like ????? what ???? but I was like wait hang on there’s a word for that ☝️🤓 and explained what it meant and that it was illegal and that you could talk to a teacher or my mom if it had happened to you and everyone was like ohhhhh I see I see and very somberly comforted the girl (she was safe she was removed from her home and living with my neighbor at the time so it wasn’t Urgent)
And this is a perfect illustration of why it is important for kids to read or variety of things, and why abusers don’t want them to.
Wattpad: pay me monthly 🤩 and we will remove ads for you. also free offline stories I guess as long as you keep paying me. but we have censorship so keep your kinks to yourself. what we don’t have is tagging systems, so good luck trying to find what you want or avoiding what you don’t want to read lol
meanwhile AO3: so everything is free in our house. read whatever you want offline. also no ads. no capitalism. no censorship. be as wild as you want with your fics. also we have tagging systems so you can search or avoid any specific tags, pairings, relationships or characters. whatever you want.
I’m sorry but if you’re still complaining, you don’t realize how good you have it with AO3, one of the last platforms on the internet that is free of capitalism and censorship. just artists and writers creating and sharing their works with the community for free and for fun. just authentic love between artists, their works, characters, stories and audiences.
not to be like that but misgendering is still misgendering even if you think you know someone’s gender better than they do. because that’s the basis of literally all misgendering you don’t get a special pass because you’re Transing Them
I’m really enamored with the dynamic of two characters who work perfectly in tandem, like pacific rim drift compatible level, but they don’t like each other. It’s not even as strong an emotion as hate it’s just a very neutral-negative dislike, but they still act in perfect concert and their individual abilities are fully complementary
It’s weird how there are some American crops that I think of as wholly integrated into the world such that I occasionally (ungratefully) forget they’re American (potatoes, tomatoes, hot peppers). But then there are other American crops where I’m lightly surprised the rest of the world grows them or is even into them (sunflowers, maize/corn, peanuts).
The real point of this post being that, while obviously I’m kinda stupid, those indigenous American agricultural bioengineers were fucking geniuses. Endless series of absolute culinary bangers. We owe them everything.
That moment when I, as a Bulgarian, realized that tomatoes, potatoes, peppers, sunflower (oil) and corn are in fact not native to my country and were imported from the Americas. I remember that day. My heart shattered. Oh, and the irony of our nationalists accusing Turkey of "stealing our cuisine". My brother in Boiko, when did Europeans discover America and what empire were we under during that year and would continue to be under it for 4 more centuries?
I'm just imagining Italians seeing a tomato for the first time, they gently put olives away, tenderly grasp the Tomato and whisper to it with love
"You are my new best friend." Same happening with Poles and potatoes XD
And much of Asia responding similarly to peppers. I think the peppers loved Asia back just as much. A true love story.
#wait potatoes are native to America???? i thought they were Irish????
@disasterpenguin
Nope! Not Irish. The potato just produces a lot of calories per square foot of soil for growing it. So it was a big hit. (Note that it’s not more nutritious than bread, it just takes less land and labour than bread.)
Other things from the Americas:
Cocoa and chocolate
Beans (except soybeans, fava beans, chickpeas, mung beans, lentils, and peas)
Squash (except inedible Eurasian gourds)
Avocados
Sweet potatoes
Vanilla
Tobacco
Pineapple
Cassava/manioc
And some American critters:
Chipmunks
Raccoons 🦝
Hummingbirds
Skunks
Turkeys
Guinea pigs
Llamas, alpacas, vicuñas, etc.
Turkeys
On the flip side, things that are not native to the Americas include:
Rice
Horses, donkeys, mules
Cattle (so also dairy), pigs, sheep, and domesticated goats
Chickens
Large dogs
Cats
Rats
Earthworms
Pigeons, house sparrows, starlings
Wheat
Onions and garlic
Citrus
Bananas
Honey
Sugar
People always forget that every horse in the Americas came from Eurasia. Which may come from some idea that indigenous people in the Americas were… static, unchanging cultures? As opposed to the reality, which is tribes like the Lakota taking one look at these weird new animals and going “oh hell yeah” and doing horses so good it would make Genghis Khan shed tears of awe
is it weird if i say i genuinely wish there was more positivity aimed at people w large chests
"having a large chest is the beauty standard" no having a large chest is the Sexual standard theres a difference. i can only even be Hot and everything i ever wear will be deemed too sexual for every single situation. tank top shows too much cleavege or side boob a button up is always too busty and a crop top will always show too much skin. having a large chest leads to so much back pain and sexualization and complaining about it makes people go "ahh grass is alwahs greener/you are the beauty standard, why complain?" like genuinely i urge yall to watch anything with a larger chested woman and notice, REALLY notice, that her chest is her entire personality. notice that people critiqing misogynist charavter designs alwayd tend to rally in the statement that large chest=misogny, casting aside the Many Many Many women and people who look like Me and just . have a large chest? and exist? and deserve respect and not to be seen as nothing more than a sex symbol by both sides? idk ikdayy
Hey, man, c'mere. Listen. Get in real close, this is important.
You're gonna make stuff again. You're gonna make stuff you're proud of. You're gonna make stuff you're excited to share. You're going to feel that overwhelming drive to create, not just the frantic I want to want to you're stuck in now. You're going to have awesome ideas, and you're going to make them into reality. You're going to create again. You're still an artist. You're still a writer. You're still home to the same passion you had before. You'll find it again. It's not gone. It's just resting. Let it rest. You're going to make stuff again. I promise.
“yes, I’ve been wanting to read that!” I say with complete earnestness, as I proceed to ignore every opportunity I have to read it
“I’ve been meaning to read/watch/listen to that, but the stars are not in position, so I can’t do it yet”
"Why do you talk so much about being intersex?"
Over 90% of parents of visibly intersex children opt for cosmetic surgery on their infants.
The ones that don't experience medical violence then, likely experience it as a teenager.
I didn't.
I am very rare in that I did not experience medical violence.
Why? Because I learned what intersexuality was as a young age, and I actively fought against what doctors wanted to do to me. All the way down to legal research on what medical care minors can be forced into. I remember walking into that doctor's appointment with the state law written down that proved that if I did not consent they could not do surgery.
That is why intersex activism is important. It saved me and it will save more.
again. bodily autonomy, fundamental bodily autonomy HAS to have room for people doing things with their own bodies that you do not and will not approve of. if it doesnt, it is not bodily autonomy
🌾🌾🌾
Harvesting my wheat
Hehehehehe
Can I fucking help you?
my senior english teacher told me that any scene with a woman in a cornfield in every piece of literature ever is about her journey to womanhood/pleasuring herself in the field and i just.... believed her
What
What
yeah so the word “hysteria” is literally the name of a supposed “mental disease” that is caused by the movement of the uterus. this disease is fake btw.
it was also used to justify lobotomizing women ☝️ by the way.
calling a woman (or anyone with a uterus, really) “hysterical” is misogynistic. end of sentence. you cannot justify the use of that word.