My stepdad is so fucking funny sometimes
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@theodore-the-albacore
My stepdad is so fucking funny sometimes
Something about the bastardization of the story time and time again proves that nobody in power really cares about the people who would resonate with Kingās Carrie White. A girl so ugly and repulsive sheās been removed from her own story. The societal need for women and girls to be constantly perceived as attractive is what fuels a fair amount of her torment in the book, but that person isnāt even allowed to exist on the screen. We cannot empathize with her; it isnāt allowed. Itās fascinating to me.
Carrie stood among stolidly, a frog among swans. She was a chunky girl with pimples on her neck and back and buttocks, her wet hair completely without color.
Art by Dominic Bustamante (@/dommnics)
brooding men who cannot communicate their feelings if their life depended on it are only hot when they're fictional. if i have to deal with one in real life i will curse him and pray for his downfall every night before i go to bed
It's because the writer communicates their feelings for them. If people wanna pull that off in real life they need to hire a guy to walk around behind them narrating.
#can i be the guy#ill narrate SO incorrectly#theyll all learn how to talk for themselves just to shut me up (via @cirrus-grey)
i'm loving the implication that this isn't something they hired you for, but something you'd do as some sort of public service.
u are NOT A SON OF ODIN u live in JACKSONVILLE FLORIDA
Languages tend to peak at their word for butterfly. Never seen 2 that are the same, either. Papillon. Mariposa. Borboleta. Fluture. Vlinder. Schmetterling. Pillangó. Babochka. Farfalla. Sommerfugl. Perhonen. Farasha. Titali. ChÅchÅ. Nabi. HĆŗdiĆ©. Buom buom. Great job guys, i really mean it.
wishing everyone a very universal basic income
do you guys remember when we googled something and we would get results that were actually related to the things we searched
when the belly has rolls
I actually really like the thing when you're starting to get the hang of a new language, enough to understand and say simple sentences but you gotta get creative to get more complex thoughts across, like a puzzle. I remember a time in the restortation school when a classmate who wasn't natively finnish and did her best anyway dropped something and sighed, telling me "every day is monday this week. I have had four mondays this week." And I understood.
I don't think I speak much of spanish anymore, but in the nursing school training period I did there, I did manage to get by with making weird Tarzan sentences. I got a nosebleed at some point and startled another nurse. Not knowing the words "humidity" or "stress", I managed to string together: "This is ok. It is hot, it is cold, I have a bad day, I am sad, I have blood. This is normal for me." And she understood.
And sometimes you just say things weird, but it's better than not saying it. One time, I was stuck in a narrow hallway behind someone walking really slowly with a walker, and he apologised for being in the way. I was not in any hurry, but didn't know the spanish word for "hurry", but I did know enough words to try to circumvent it by borrowing the english "I have all the time in the world."
The man burst into one of those cackling old man laughters that they do when something in this world still manages to surprise them. He had to be somewhere between 70 and a 100 years old, and I guess if there was one thing he wasn't expecting to hear today, it would be a random blond vaguely baltic-looking fuck casually announce that he is the sole owner and keeper of the very concept of time.
Iāve mostly learned Chinese in school, so I know a lot of academic vocabulary while having the language skills of a toddler in some basic areas. Once, I forgot the word for sad, which is a really dumb thing to forget. A bunch of the ways to say sad in Chinese are literally just ānot happyā, but I also momentarily forgot how to say happy. So instead I said āthere is an economic downturn inside my brainā.
today's gregor samsa is: at dairy queen
requested by: anonymous
gonna be honest i donāt know how many more āenter the 6 digit code we sent to your phoneās i got left in me
It's my cat's birthday (anniversary of me getting him) so I told him the story of his life while petting him real good
Highlights include:
For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.
Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.
Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.
I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.
I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.
Now you've lived with me for five years. Five is like the number of toe beans on one of your feet. When I clip your nails five is when we're halfway done. But we're hopefully not even halfway done with how long we get to be together. I'm gonna have to figure out new ways to help you count.
Actually I've decided this is a poem
This is getting notes so let me just say
Himb šššššš
Look we're having a serious discussion here and my heart shaped pupils are none of your concern.
Hilariously funny that they let the guy known for wandering off without warning to look at birds was allowed to do this
#famously few birds in space#probably the safest place to take him
Horny people legally cannot consent. Horniness is a clouded state like inebriation. If you are partway through sex and you realize you might've become horny, it is illegal to continue. If you have ever made someone horny, you are a bad person.
Stardew valley is problematic because it forces you to have an outside cat in a threatened woodland environment
truly the idea of "this scene is (un-)necessary to the story" is such a fundamentally uncurious and anti-art way of engaging with fiction. the story itself is unnecessary, in the sense that all art is unnecessary, because art is not a fucking optimization problem. that's the beauty of it