Thoguhts

A newsletter that shares thoughts for being productive, self-improvement, general life lessons, and whatnot...

[thethoguhts]

7 Positive Signs Of High Self-Confidence

Did you ever wonder if you were confident or not ? Or what makes a particular person confident ? How can you tell ? Many people ask themselves this question :

How does a confident person act ? Well, I’m here to show you 6 different signs that will help you determine if you, or someone you know is a confident person. Ready ? Let’s start.

1. You rarely hesitate

Confident people are known for assertiveness, which means that they know what they want and how to get it. The first sign of someone who’s really confident is that you rarely hesitate because you chose a path and stuck to it instead of constantly jumping from one decision to another without making a clear choice on what you want to do.

2. You never try to be someone else

I think it’s pretty obvious. People who are confident never try to act in fake manner, or try to mimic someone else in order to seem cool or better than who they really are, simply because they appreciate themselves enough to realize that they are good enough so why should they change themselves ?

3. You stick to your ideas when necessary

Confidence means accepting when you’re wrong, and changing your ideas if they aren’t of any real value. But it also means knowing when to keep them despite what anyone has to say, because many times you’ll face rejection from a lot of people despite the fact that you may be right, and they may be absolutely wrong. That’s when you have stand up for your beliefs and not let anyone convince you to drop them.

4. You have a sense of direction in life

This means that you’re fully aware of what you want in life, and that you have a plan on how you can get to where you want to go. It’s hard to be confident about your life, and yourself, if you don’t even know where your life is going, and you’re not really in control.

5. You’re not easily influenced by what others say

This is probably the biggest sign to tell if someone is confident or not, just check if other people can easily manipulate him. Being hard to influence means that you know who you are, what you want, and who to listen to. It means that you’re well aware that you are the only one who takes decisions because it’s your life, not anyone else’s.

6. You’re totally comfortable with yourself

In other words, you think you are actually good enough. This means that you really believe that you can do whatever you want, and that you are good enough as a person without constantly needing approval or feeling inferior to other people you know. You can put it this way : you love being you.

7. You don’t seek approval from others

Most people turn to others in order to know if what they’re doing is ‘right’, which means that people check if others like what they do to decide if they’re doing something good or not. If you’re genuinely confident, then you don’t need someone to tell you that you’re right, because you already know it.

Being able to live your life, and make decisions without caring about what others think of you, or say about you is a major sign of real confidence.

You can subscribe to my newsletter, where I talk about self-improvement and Intentional living that can take people closer to their vision..

[thethoguhts]

7 Positive Signs Of High Self-Confidence

Did you ever wonder if you were confident or not ? Or what makes a particular person confident ? How can you tell ? Many people ask themselves this question :

How does a confident person act ? Well, I’m here to show you 6 different signs that will help you determine if you, or someone you know is a confident person. Ready ? Let’s start.

1. You rarely hesitate

Confident people are known for assertiveness, which means that they know what they want and how to get it. The first sign of someone who’s really confident is that you rarely hesitate because you chose a path and stuck to it instead of constantly jumping from one decision to another without making a clear choice on what you want to do.

2. You never try to be someone else

I think it’s pretty obvious. People who are confident never try to act in fake manner, or try to mimic someone else in order to seem cool or better than who they really are, simply because they appreciate themselves enough to realize that they are good enough so why should they change themselves ?

3. You stick to your ideas when necessary

Confidence means accepting when you’re wrong, and changing your ideas if they aren’t of any real value. But it also means knowing when to keep them despite what anyone has to say, because many times you’ll face rejection from a lot of people despite the fact that you may be right, and they may be absolutely wrong. That’s when you have stand up for your beliefs and not let anyone convince you to drop them.

4. You have a sense of direction in life

This means that you’re fully aware of what you want in life, and that you have a plan on how you can get to where you want to go. It’s hard to be confident about your life, and yourself, if you don’t even know where your life is going, and you’re not really in control.

5. You’re not easily influenced by what others say

This is probably the biggest sign to tell if someone is confident or not, just check if other people can easily manipulate him. Being hard to influence means that you know who you are, what you want, and who to listen to. It means that you’re well aware that you are the only one who takes decisions because it’s your life, not anyone else’s.

6. You’re totally comfortable with yourself

In other words, you think you are actually good enough. This means that you really believe that you can do whatever you want, and that you are good enough as a person without constantly needing approval or feeling inferior to other people you know. You can put it this way : you love being you.

7. You don’t seek approval from others

Most people turn to others in order to know if what they’re doing is ‘right’, which means that people check if others like what they do to decide if they’re doing something good or not. If you’re genuinely confident, then you don’t need someone to tell you that you’re right, because you already know it.

Being able to live your life, and make decisions without caring about what others think of you, or say about you is a major sign of real confidence.

You can subscribe to my newsletter, where I talk about self-improvement and Intentional living that can take people closer to their vision..

[thethoguhts]

Do more things willingly, and you will see self-improvement and joy increase manifold.

I had always disliked learning a new language, reading books, doing dishes, cleaning my room, going to certain events, and more. Most things in my life I didn’t like to do much because I am very lazy.

But then something happened that changed my perspective. I realized that I could put myself in someone else’s shoes and help them out, walk with people, buy groceries, or talk to someone with a smile on my face. After doing this willingly, I began to find enjoyment in it, and this feeling has remained with me for several weeks.

I learned that flipping my mindset was the key to enjoying the things I had once found torturous. Instead of looking at how productive I was being, I simply focused on doing what I was doing without resistance. This made a noticeable difference in my progress.

To sum up, Sadhguru’s quote, “Anything you do willingly can become a great pleasure and a process of growth for you,” rings true.

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[thethoguhts]

We have a responsibility to remember the bad times, even if it hurts us to admit they happened. We have a responsibility to remember the good times, even if it hurts to admit they're gone. And in times where you don't know where to go, you need only remember how you got to where you are now.

This is a quote from a 79-year-old stranger left for me in a coffee shop.

He quit his job at the age of 38, with two young kids and a stay-at-home wife, to start his own company. Even though it was a near-perfect job, many people thought he had lost his mind. 

However, he had the full support of his wife, and she was the one who encouraged him to take the leap. Although it's a lot of work and can be challenging, it is also very rewarding for him.

He said that balancing work and life is not easy all the time. There will be failures, and it may age you a bit faster than a regular 9-5 job. Despite everything, he would do it all over again if given the chance.

He is now the oldest owner and starting to give a lot of his responsibilities to other folks in the company.

And with a smile, he said that the best feeling is seeing the younger generation take over and run things.

Read full here...

[thethoguhts]

How did I become a productive person from being a formal lazy guy?

I am from an environment where watching movies and TV series all day was considered as one of the best days. It didn't change from a simple motivation video from Instagram reels.

Even tho sometimes I get motivated to do something, I see myself doing nothing and scrolling mindlessly, but changing was inevitable for me, it had to happen no matter what, and with my stubborn mind in play I accomplished creating a productive person. 

The most important part was changing my ways of thinking:

Do a task while I’m thinking about it and just be done with it. Gets it out of my mind and I no longer need to be thinking about it.

Do not paralyze me into inactivity. It doesn’t need to be done perfectly, it just needs to be done. I can always revisit and look for ways of improving or being more efficient.

Challenge your brain to be hyper efficient. How you can optimize your time in a given moment, to get the max things that need to get done in the shortest amount of time. You have 10 things that need to get done, you only completed 5. You still completed 5 things. Next time, you have a target for improvement.

Use laziness as a reward and not a barrier. I reward myself with doing nothing for 3 hours, once I’ve cleared off all my tasks. Few things feel better, than doing absolutely nothing with a clear mind.

I pretend I have a drill sergeant in my brain and I’m in boot camp. Every time I am tempted to leave something until later, the drill sergeant tells me that is not an option. To get the fuck moving and get shit done NOW. And then I get it done because I don’t want to “be that guy” that can’t seem to leave things better than I found them.

Finally, appreciate the effort. When you do something, give yourself some credit. That shit matters. Remind yourself that taking care of your life, in all aspects of it, is a benefit to you. YOU are worth taking care of. Lazy is a label, it’s not a word that defines who you are. You are either doing what needs to be done, or you make the choice not to. Make the choice to do it. Be proud of how productive you are while feeling good about the mindset.

Hope it was helpful….

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[thethoguhts]

Your behaviors control your destination

If you have the behavior of writing, then you are likely good at being a writer, If you have the habit of spending money more than you earn, you have the skill of getting broke fast, and the list goes on.

Having bad behavior can ruin your long-term goal at super speed. A nasty daily routine, and making excuses, are some of the situations you need to get out of.

You have been going through this behavior for ages so It is not something you can change easily. Altering these bad practices with good ones takes time.

Instead of running, face every situation and solve them by setting good behaviors. Start by doing your pending project, go to your gym, work on improving your writing skills, or make your morning routine as healthy as possible.

If You control your behaviors then you can control the goals. Behaviors are the things you can control and goals are something that is way out of your command. So control the things you can manage and eventually, the goals come into your hands.

Steps to Achieve Better Results

• Set Goals.

• Start with the tinniest step that gets to the goal.

• Be consistent and disciplined.

• Create a system of rewards for every small achievement.

• Repeat long-term actions.

• Don’t let excuses stop your steps.

And Forget the result; focus on the progress.

Subscribe to The Selfish Mind to get ideas and pieces of information about how you can improve mentally, physically, and emotionally.

If you have the behavior of writing, then you are likely good at being a writer, If you have the habit of spending money more than you earn, you have the skill of getting broke fast, and the list goes on.

Having bad behavior can ruin your long-term goal at super speed. A nasty daily routine, and making excuses, are some of the situations you need to get out of.

You have been going through this behavior for ages so It is not something you can change easily. Altering these bad practices with good ones takes time.

Instead of running, face every situation and solve them by setting good behaviors. Start by doing your pending project, go to your gym, work on improving your writing skills, or make your morning routine as healthy as possible.

If You control your behaviors then you can control the goals. Behaviors are the things you can control and goals are something that is way out of your command. So control the things you can manage and eventually, the goals come into your hands.

Steps to Achieve Better Results

• Set Goals.

• Start with the tinniest step that gets to the goal.

• Be consistent and disciplined.

• Create a system of rewards for every small achievement.

• Repeat long-term actions.

• Don’t let excuses stop your steps.

And Forget the result; focus on the progress.

Subscribe to The Selfish Mind to get ideas and pieces of information about how you can improve mentally, physically, and emotionally.

[thethoguhts]

A lot of people try to change their mindset before making physical changes, but I usually find it works better the other way

Regular sleeping cycle

I have found out that unfortunately my body is very very sleep dependant. That is, not getting adequate sleep has more impact on my mood, energy, appearance etc. than any other change, which is why it’s at the top. Inadequate sleep can actually make me feel hungover the next day which is why it’s important to stay on top of. I have found that if I go to sleep between 10 and 10.30, I wake up naturally before my alarm at 6.30am and I have no desire to fall back to sleep — this sets the tone for my day with a focused, energetic and interpersonal demeanour. However, if i fall asleep by 11.30 I wake up in a haze, red eyed and still tired. The difference that extra hour or even half hour will make is so under rated — respect your body’s Circadian Rhythm and it will respect you. I found alot of amazing info in a book called Why We Sleep by Mathew Walker.

Foods you are avoiding to eat

Alot of people advise on what you should eat which is obviously important, but for me, maintaining a strong energy throughout the day is also down to steering clear of certain foods. I’m talking about refined carbohydrates such as bread, pasta and of course sugar. When I eat these foods it’s almost certain I’ll crash due to their high glycemic qualities and will not fully recover for the rest of the day, where I will remain somewhat introverted and tired. Not eating these foods also does not bloat your stomach and will have you looking slimmer. For lunch I stick to cooked veg and fish/meat. Further, I don’t ‘intermittently fast’ per se, but I do give my body a food-free window in the morning for 2–3 hours which allows all your regulatory hormones to secrete and settle without the added stress of ingesting and absorbing food. Jordan Peterson claims his first recommendation to patients is eating a fat-heavy breakfast in the morning to mop up excess insulin, as opposed to carb-heavy which increases blood sugar.

Eating the right foods.

As you may be aware there has been alot of exciting research around the human microbiome and our symbiotic relationship with bacteria. If you’re not aware I would suggest you start with a book called ‘The Diet Myth’, which explains not only what you should eat but also why. The long and short of it is you should eat the widest range of natural foods possible for your body (veg, cheese, nuts, oils) so as to cultivate a broad range of microbial species in your stomach — the broader the better! There is a proven theory that your brain communicates alot with your stomach through the Vegus Nerve and can strongly influence mood (as well as auto immune conidtions). In addition, clean foods give you so much more energy and make you look so much better.

Cutting out masturbation

This was my biggest vice — It was quite literally an addiction like cigarettes or coffee but I had no idea it was an issue because, it’s just wanking right? Wrong. The reason it becomes addictive is because it stimulates the same neurological receptors that are responsible for your sense of reward and achievement. When you’re bashing your bishop even once a day you are exploiting your brain’s reward circuitry and tiring it out. Once it’s exhausted, every day things that would give you a sense of pleasure or drive are no longer effective because the receptors have already been over-loaded from last night’s internet indulgence. I could go on about this for days but you can do your own research easily on the web. For me, the results of just abstaining for even a few days were incredible.

Haircut

Never underestimate the power of a clean fade bro (or if you’re a woman just a professional clean and blow dry I guess?)

1.1 Now you can focus on mindset! I didn’t realise how important meditation was until i actually tried to still my mind and couldn’t. Months on, I’m still shit at it but getting better. What you have to remember is meditation/mindfulness is singularity of the mind even when consciously active. Washing the dishes? Focus on it. Driving? Focus on it. Eating a sandwich? Focus on it. I also find that affirmations help, resonating with the galactic frequencies to see yourself where you want to be and acting on it.

1.2 Having a goal You need this, this sense of purpose and identity. You will surely wither away and rot inside without it. It can be anything — job, your kids, working out, hobby, passion. Find what makes you drive and dig!

I’m not saying I stick to these steps religiously, sometimes I fall right off the band wagon — but when I know its time to pick myself up, these are the areas I work on. Collectively they make me more extroverted, clearer headed, give me more conviction and far more efficient.

Hope it helps, good luck!

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[thethoguhts]

Stop seeking external validation from others and be happy by yourself

I’m still working through this myself. Here are a few things that are helping me:

Get professional help like therapy

Do a daily “I did well” list- list out 3 things you did well today

Look for things you like about yourself and remind yourself of them. For me, I think I’m kind to my cats, and I am proud of my music tastes

Try to make decisions on your own without seeking other’s validation. Even the smallest thing like a choice of meal or which thing to buy. Try just not asking anyone for their opinion. You’ll learn to trust yourself more and know that no matter what your decision is it’ll all be ok.

As sucky as this is, experience new and difficult situations. You’ll come out remembering having overcome them and feel immensely proud of yourself. For me one of it was giving a presentation in my department and having to improvise on the spot. When it happened I felt so nervous but after that I felt really proud of myself.

Know that you are your best supporter. You live with yourself and you will die with yourself. Be your best friend.

If you like this, you will probably love my newsletter, which will help you learn 1% weekly. Read this post I added a week ago, you’ll understand what I mean….

[thethoguhts]

Dark Manipulation Techniques To Make Your Life Better 4/4

[thethoguhts]

Dark Manipulation Techniques To Make Your Life Better 1/4

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Dark Manipulation Techniques To Make Your Life Better 2/4

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Dark Manipulation Techniques To Make Your Life Better 3/4

[thethoguhts]

You need daily 3 wins:

A physical win.

Walking, running, lifting, swimming...

A mental win.

Reading, writing, creating, learning...

A spiritual win.

Praying, meditating, studying, growing...

Be a complete winner!

Learn more in my newsletter, in which I give away the most helpful content once a week.

[thethoguhts]

Procrastination is a silent killer. Here's how to break this habit...

1. Accept the reality Understand that you're not disciplined.

It will help define your future.

And come up with a plan to fix this.

The first step to solving any problem is admitting it exists.

2. Establish reasonable goals.

It is scary to think about completing huge goals.

Breaking down huge accomplishments into digestible chunks will help.

Ex:-

• Finish a book by reading 10 pages per day By attaining these small goals, you will move closer to completion.

3. Organize your work Setting deadlines for your tasks will help you work more efficiently It will keep you motivated and excited about your task.

Make this happen, set

• Weekly/Monthly Tasks

This creates a sense of urgency and motivates you to work toward your goals

4. Focus your attention.

Try to complete simple activities first.

This will help you focus better.

It will strengthen you:

• Self-assurance

• Motivation

• Momentum Concentrate on tiny, specific activities.

5. Remove any potential distractions.

Distractions are simple to introduce whether it's your desk phone or the television in the background.

Make these:

• Create a workplace

• Turn off notifications

You don't need to check your phone every 5 minutes.

Improve yourself by 1% every day by subscribing to Thoguhts!

It helps you:

• Grow new perspectives

• Build good habits

• Earn self-improvement

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[thethoguhts]

Stop making every conversation about yourself. Be more private. Think more speak less

I realized about a year ago, that I’d picked up a trait from my mother, wherein I would not be present in conversations. Instead, I’d be trying to find a way to agree/disagree with the person about a point, and then direct the conversation towards being about MY experience of said thing.

It’s been hard, like rewiring my brain, but I hope I’ve become more stoic and thoughtful. I was an obnoxious extrovert who had no privacy, shared everything online, and never thought before I spoke.

This post is actually just me talking about me, but I guess it’s good to share these things. If you think you’re too ‘much’ sometimes, it could be because you are seeking approval from external things.

Whereas true happiness comes from finding the quiet calm, the ‘home’ within you. Once you find this place, you’ll see that your friend list is narrowed down. You’ll seek only true friends who align with your values, and experiences that bring you purpose and fulfillment and you’ll find a calm quiet center within :)

Something extra:

Well, it is important to share information with others, especially those who care about you. However, you should equally give importance to being mindful of how, when, and what you share. If someone shares something with you, Showing empathy or responding with a related story can be a great way to connect. Anyhow, it can be offensive and create a negative impression if you overshare or try to one-up the other person’s story. Thus, it’s important to strike a balance and be mindful of the impact your words may have on others.

Men today are suffering from issues that no one talks about:

• Poor Productivity at work

• Low self-esteem

• Lack of self-improvement ideas

• Obesity

• Porn

Men, pick yourself up. Become a Thoguhts subscriber now

[thethoguhts]

15 Unspoken Rules For Men:

1. Don’t lend money to your family. Give it.

2. Never shake a hand while sitting down.

3. Protect who is behind you, and respect who is beside you.

4. Never eat the last piece of something you didn't buy.

5. Don't throw your friend under the bus to impress someone.

6. Never insult the cooking when you are the guest.

7. Don't use the urinal next to an occupied one.

8. Don't take out your phone during a conversation.

9. Never take credit for work you didn't do.

10. Listen, nod, and most of all make eye contact.

11. Don't make fun of your friend in front of his kids.

12. Never let emotions overpower you.

13. Never beg for a relationship.

14. Dress well no matter what the occasion.

15. Always look for growth pieces of information

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[thethoguhts]

It's either 3 years of sacrifice or 30 years of struggle.

Here's how to transform your life.

1.) Read self-help books.

Read for at least 100 minutes per day.

Try these out:

• Atomic Habits

• Think and Grow Rich

• 5AM Club Just 20 pages of reading per day will provide you with unique advantages in life.

Note: Take the information into your account and start executing more.

2.) Fix your Finances

Pay attention to making money and financial education

• Don't rely on a 9 to 5 job.

• Focus only on one long-term income stream and gradually increase the number of assets.

Be clever enough to understand that earning a salary will never make you wealthy.

3.) Start learning new skills.

Do yourself a favor and work on your future for 1 hour every day. Learn this.

• Writing

• Coding

• Investing

• Video editing

• Managing money

• content creation

Your skills are 10 times more valuable than your college degree.

4.) Invest in yourself.

Make your own luck by working very hard.

Start investing in

• training

• mentors

• coaches

• courses

Wealthy people see this as an investment rather than a cost.

5.) Reduce Phone Usage

Instead of making you more successful, the phone is making you more slavish.

Do these

• Unfollow harmful influencers

• Remove harmful apps

• Exited from the group chats

If you scroll constantly, nothing will happen. Try something worthwhile.

6.) Avoid chasing cheap dopamine.

High-value people never do this.

• Watching porn

• Drinking alcohol

• Craving attention

Get addicted to bettering yourself rather than seeking out cheap thrills.

Men today are suffering from issues that no one talks about:

• Low self-esteem

• Lack of productivity

• Obesity

• Porn

Men, pick yourself up. Become a Thoguhts subscriber now: