"Hi, yes, I need a refill for XYZ. I just looked at the date on the bottle, and it says to refill by literally 2 days ago, but surely you can still give me a refill because 2 days is not a substantial amount of time."
"Ahh, I'm sorryyyyy!! We actually can't give you a refill. You'll have to go back to your doctor and set up an actual appointment to renew the prescription. If you called two days ago, this wouldn't be necessary, but unfortunately, it expired."
"...Why are you not able to refill it now?"
"Well we can't tell if you're still taking the medication or if you still need it, so if you make an appointment with your doctor to confirm if you still need it, we can totally get you a refill! :)"
"So if I called literally less than 48 hours ago, you would have been completely under the assumption that this is a medication I still need. But now you are under the assumption that my chronic illness has magically cured itself within the span of two days, to where I need a doctors confirmation that my chronic illness, is still, in fact chronic, for you to do a refill."
"Jesus okay let me call my doctor."
"Hello doctor X, I would really appreciate it if you could renew my prescription for XYZ because I am pretty much out, and as you know, this medication depends on my ability to function."
"Hi! It's nice to hear from you again, but you will have to come in person and schedule an appointment for me to renew your prescription."
"Why. I'm pretty much housebound, and going to physical doctors appointments leaves me symptomatic for weeks. I would really like to avoid doing that since I'm being forced to attend holiday events soon, and I need all the energy I can get."
"I completely understand! Unfortunately, we can't tell if this is really you over the phone."
"....but you've heard my voice before. It's me. You know me."
"Yes, but that's not a form of reliable identification to ensure that you still need this medication, that you're renewing it for yourself and not someone else, not taking more than you should, abusing it, etc."
"...I can send you a photo of my ID."
"I understand your frustration, but that is still not a reliable form of identification. In-person identification is what is required."
"I can literally read off my damn social security number. My birth certificate. I can fax you a copy of my fucking taxes. Anything. I just need a refill. A refill that I would have had no issues with if I ordered it two days ago."
"Still unreliable. Would you like to set up an appointment for sometime soon?"
"...." *Literally vibrating with rage at this point.*
"...I have about 4 days left of my medication. When is the soonest you can get me in."
And this usually results in me having to wait an extra month, unmedicated, overly symptomatic and flaring by the time I have to physically go to the appointment, only to have to wait an extra few days for the pharmacy to actually have my meds, because these dumb fucking cunt ass bitches are convinced that either I'm not me, that my chronic illness has magically cured itself, or that I'm secretly a drug addict abusing my medication.
YALL ARE ACTING LIKE I'M ASKING FOR OPIOIDS.
