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call me batman! sometimes I reblog things. 20+

[midnightvrose]

[black-nata]

me @ my last brain cell

[naamahdarling]

That has to be the most humiliating way to describe one of Earth's most terrifyingly effective predators.

[sapphic-and-stupid]

Picture of her from the USA Today

[teaboot]

I would let her kill me for sport

[vaelus-malewife]

[shower-thoughts-last-responder]

[spatscolombo-deactivated2022030]

How DARE Tolkien omit in the final draft the information that the traditional hobbit marriage custom is to have unspoken vibes for years and then disappear without explanation for an indeterminate length of time!?

[tehri]

#where's the fic where bilbo returns with thorin in tow and no one bats an eye#like#'he married a dwarf did he? well he always was an odd fellow'#'good day to you master dwarf how's your husband?'#and thorin is just ?????#'how do they know i'm courting him? did he show them the mithril shirt?'#just give me all the hilarious culture clashes ok

@finegoddamnit​ how dare you hide this in the tags

[nevertheless-moving]

so that whole time merry, pippin, sam, and frodo are gone the whole shire is losing their minds arguing over who married who.

[hannahlockillustration]

Ditto with a parasol, based on Woman with a Parasol by Claude Monet (1875)

Drawing Ditto until I give in and buy a Switch 2....

[beholdingslut]

in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

[dikdikpronouncedxylophone]

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

HOLY SHIT GUYS, I WAS INSPIRED BY THIS POST TO TRY MAKE THE SONG AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT WHEN I DRAGGED THE TRAINING AUDIO OVER THE BACKING TRACK AND IT LINED UP PERFECTLY

Visit Original Link

Tempted to actually put this on spotify so I can secretly stream it at work...

Tagging @batshit-auspol because as an Australian you're the only big account I know who might share (sorry).

[punkrorschach]

happy first day of pride everyone

[strawberryamanita]

[pricklythepear]

[nomeki]

[timberwool]

Happy Pride 🌈

[cosmicdogmoon]

[nvmlmao]

[moghedien]

I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with

But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy

[moghedien]

Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy

[sixty-silver-wishes]

happy pride month to the fuck tree I guess

[apolladay]

What do you prefer your house thermostat set at, in degrees Celcius?

64 or lower

65-67

68-69

70-72

73 or higher

No preference

What do you prefer your house thermostat set at, in degrees Celcius?

64 or lower

65-67

68-69

70-72

73 or higher

No preference

Voting ended onJun 2

[bbboar]

Anon you fucked up so bad

[sophiemars]

From the notes

[supertaliart]

I connected the dots.

[todaysbird]

i think this is…actually the most extreme stupid dove nest I’ve seen.

video

[kaiapraxidike]

[tartrazeen]

Imagine you're coming home after a long day of hunting, and the first thing you hear is your seven shitty kids screeching at you for no reason, how pissed off would you be, I'd immediately fly away too

Imagine you're the oldest of seven and a fucking HOA member broke into your HOUSE and SHIT AN EGG and is BITING at your siblings, but your dad shows so you try to tell him the problem but you're very little and you don't speak English and he doesn't speak English either so you can't communicate that a fucking GOBLIN is in your HOUSE and the only reason he doesn't know is cause his ASS was on that bitch's HEAD and he must've assumed it was one of your brothers and sisters but it was actually that FREAK WOMAN who got in, and now your dad is flying away 'cause he has no idea what's going on

Imagine you're a parent and you've calmed down and gone to get McDonald's for your seven kids, and you come home expecting to get cheers because you know the D's are always a winner, but when you fly back in through the door the kids are all still screaming, and it's not even excited screams but you don't know what's wrong so you just look into the camera like you're Jim from the Office

Imagine you're one of the small middle children and probably the one that this HOA WITCH was BITING after she broke into YOUR HOUSE and SHIT an EGG and you tried to be a good host by cuddling with her to congratulate her on her egg but then she started BITING and taking over your ROOM and threw out all your GOOSEBUMPS books and your eldest sibling couldn't call dad so you all just had to wait, and then dad comes home but your STUPID FAMILY won't stop SCREECHING to explain what's going on so your dad leaves but then comes back and he's brought McDonald's which is like yay but there is an INTRUDER, and finally your dad looks around the house and notices BITCH BIRD KAREN IN YOUR BEAN BAG CHAIR, and you're like ok dad can handle this but then you learn he's more scared than you?????

Imagine you're a dad and you just got home with McDonald's and WHO THE FUCK IS THAT IN MY HOUSE but luckily you have seven children and the mean one is willing to fight this bitch and you're just gonna chill in this corner until this problem is resolved even if your other kids are straight-up judging you

Imagine you're Kevin McCallister and you're doing Home Alone except you're not home alone 'cause your dad is home too but he's not helping, he's just holding a bag of McDonald's, so you have to be the head of this house at eight years old 'cause you're home alone emotionally but this FREAK ON AN EGG isn't leaving so you decide to screech at your dad and he's more scared of you than she is

Imagine you're a dad and your child has publicly shamed you in front of your other kids and this ASSHOLE KAREN and you decide you're not gonna take this shit anymore so you tell your kids that you paid for this McDonald's with your hard-earned bird money and they're gonna damn well eat this, so everybody stop looking at that side of the house and just eat your fucking french fries but then that fucking MONSTER starts BITING your only child willing to go into battle so you recognize this is a lost cause and throw the burgers on the counter and you remember you're an ADULT so you grab your car keys and fly the fuck away

Imagine you're all seven children and dad left you with the pigeon again

[c3rvida3]

When I was in middle school, I really wanted a rat and my mama got me one before I had the chance to do any research, and I named him Mildew, and then I learned that rats get all fucked up if they don't have a buddy, so I got him a brother and I named the brother Dildew. Something to consider if you are currently pregnant with twins.

[intactics]

the most occidentalist cnovel I ever binged via MTL was about a chinese guy reincarnating into europe right before the black plague & teaching the savage europeans how to cook food and do agriculture and industry properly and inventing an innoculation for the plague and he wound up gay marrying the sexy young pope & collecting a really unreasonable number of magical animal companions along the way, including a tiger. the tiger's introduction led to my favorite author's note in the following chapter, which was basically "I've been informed Europe doesn't have tigers but I don't really give a fuck" ... that was kind of charming.

[ceescedasticity]

Definitely a tangent but for some reason the part of this that really snagged my suspension of disbelief was a pope being 'young' so I looked for that and found the following per Wikipedia:

Pope Benedict IX (Latin: Benedictus IX; c. 1012 – c. 1056), born Theophylact of Tusculum in Rome, was the bishop of Rome and ruler of the Papal States for three periods between October 1032 and July 1048 (1032–1044; 1045; 1047–1048).[1] Aged about 20 when first elected, he may have been the youngest pope in the history of the Catholic Church. He is the only person to have been pope more than once[a] and the only person ever accused of selling the papacy.

[seirxi]

revelations

[xskyll]

Who's right?

Iida! It's an extension of the courtyard!

Bakugou. It's covered AND paved. Detention!!

Voting ended onMay 11

[terraswallows]

"Give me a sign" The sign in question.

[commiemartyrshighschool]

I stopped scrolling before noticing the trans monster flag and noticed the Walmart banner and found myself once again wondering why businesses in Texas constantly advertise that they're in Texas to Texans in Texas who presumably are aware of of the fact this stuff is in Texas?