jacquelyn day 2019. go ham go wild
Interview Vampire Daily
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
todays bird

shark vs the universe
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Fai_Ryy
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
official daine visual archive
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
The Stonewall Inn
tumblr dot com
taylor price

Origami Around
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

#extradirty

ellievsbear
Keni
art blog(derogatory)

bliss lane
Color Me Curious
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United Kingdom

seen from Malaysia

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Nepal
seen from United States
seen from Spain

seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Malaysia

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Armenia
seen from India
@unfortunately-orange-curtains
jacquelyn day 2019. go ham go wild
I love how when folks write salty posts about Count Olaf and his crimes on this hellsite, they have to put ASOUE after it, "Sans Undertale" style, or else some confused person from outside the fandom will show up with an "Dang thought this was about Frozen and got confused for a min!" or a "WTF is going on in the Frozen community?" because nobody actually uses the word "Count" in posts that are meant to be in-jokes in the fandom and to never see the light of day outside of the fandom tags.
Baudelaires: we can’t run away forever!
Lemony: Yes you can! It’s pretty easy actually
Oh, also, was anyone else salty over Lemony putting Quigley's map into an evidence bag but like. Without anything to keep his prints off of it?
On one hand, it was probably just for his own personal investigation, not for any sort of Official or Volunteer investigation, so it wouldn't matter if he fucked up evidence in the long run. If, y'know, only he was going to examine it.
On another hand, this kind of nonsense could be how it wound up being easy to frame him for crimes and arson. VFD gives me some "Yeah, we really don't need to teach the kids how to fully cover their tracks, we've got our logo out on every surface in the City and beyond," vibes.
And on a third, more grim, suspiciously present hand, VFD could just be the type of group to encourage burning off one's own fingerprints to more effectively cover one's tracks. They do orphan, kidnap, brand, and brainwash children, after all.
Hi, it's 2 AM, I'm tired, behind on my daily post blog thing for another fandom, and a Fool, but uh:
My sibling and I are watching the new season together and uh? I'm so happy with the new season and also? I'm so happy to finally get to have some Sibling Bonding Time over this series!
But also, we all gotta collectively pour one out for our favorite Duchess of Winnipeg this Secretary's Day, I guess.
This week on “Did a Member of VFD Say That, or was it Said by M in her Actual Real Life?”
“Huh, you’d think that I’d be able to just log into this, considering I’ve been a member of this organization since I was six years old, but I guess not!”
count olaf but he’s the dr heinz doofenschmirtz of the asoue world
Don't slander Dr. Doofenschmirtz like this.
Shower Thought: A group of Volunteers should be called a cemetery.
Too soon :(
?????
My bad, crematorium would have been more accurate.
at this point I can’t even remember how we got on the subject anymore, but my brother mentioned that he randomly got a mental image of Esmé with a headset on raging at somebody during a Twitch stream and I started thinking about, of all things, a VFD-as-YouTubers AU.
Violet would post “how to”/DIY videos showcasing her inventions and occasionally do videos about recent popular movies that display an insulting lack of attention to how physics work
Klaus would absolutely be vlogging every day to infodump about new books he’s read and occasionally comparing the book and film versions of things that get adapted
Sunny 100% used to upload “babies react” style videos of herself until commenters began to worry about the safety of the apparently unattended baby in all of them. Now she likes, comments on, and promotes all her siblings’ videos and acts as their social media consultant
Esmé I keep picturing as a really snarky vlogger and social media influencer who talks about new trends and does unboxing videos whenever a company sends her free things, but never actually offers a tutorial or piece of advice. She uploads a rant every time she loses a subscriber and is definitely involved in drama with some other YouTube/VFD personality.
that’s all I can think of at the moment but I am certain there’s potential here even if it’s 100% nonsense
Lemony Snicket has a channel that he posts generally easier to grasp explanations of various events (both recent and long past), passive-aggressive reviews of film and stage adaptations of books (he favors the book versions most of the time), an entire video explaining the water cycle, and the occasional, horrifying coded video message that only ever stays up for a few hours at a time before it's completely deleted. He just voices over everything while filming an empty chair in an empty room. The rooms and chairs are never the same in any videos, and he has no schedule for posts. Sometimes alludes to VFD in non-coded videos, but under so much other content that only another member of VFD would quite manage to catch it. Has replied to a surprising number of comments, but in increasingly cryptic ways. Age gates every video he swears in.
Olaf's channel is just a dumpster fire. Think Logan Paul mixed with whatever collective cursed energy you'd get from putting those YouTube film critics who produce mildly entertaining content (but you wouldn't ever trust to be within ten feet of you) and a certain video game theorist who no longer produces content of any real merit in a room together. He insults people. He posts offensive content pretty regularly. He nearly got banned for posting a video with what appears to be a corpse in the background, unexplained and never acknowledged, but he somehow managed to get away with privating the video. There's so much absolute nonsense that it's practically a virtual archeological dig to find the handful of old videos he made to mock Lemony Snicket's videos, where he just put his face out of frame and talked about book to stage adaptations for a few minutes at a time, always favoring the stage versions. Suspiciously, his name (or an anagram of his name) can be located in the cast lists (in minor roles) in a local performance of every single one of those plays, and the video release dates tend to be just before those performances were given. There are also a handful of bitter rants directed at all of the Snicket siblings for various reasons, although he doesn't name drop them outright in most of those videos. Probably talks eagerly about child abuse in at least one video that has been flagged to hell and back. Fire-fighters regularly comment things along the lines of "Very Fucking Distasteful" on his videos, using dozens of false accounts to spam him en masse.
Oh no, OP, you're definitely on to something with this. Lots of room to work.
This is a terrible Loss for our organization.
About a month ago I put the eye on an egg (which proceed to break but, in all honesty, I should have seen that one coming).
It was a project that involved open flame, so my dumbass brain said "Oh! We're gonna do this now!" and so I did.
I cropped the picture a heckton because the entire background was the disaster area that is my bedroom floor. We don't need to involve that in this.
Do you guys wanna hear about the Lemony/Editor pairing?
Oh, I saw in the notes that you want!
First of all, this is considering the Editor to not be someone we already know (though I love those theories). Also, I imagine him as a guy because, you know, gendered first language 🤷
Anyway:
- Mr. Editor was never involved with a secret organization in all of his life, which is one of the reasons Lemony chose him specifically for the job.Â
- He learned the stuff the same way we all did: reading the books. He had no idea of what he was getting into. He only accepted this job because the idea of a supposedly dead wanted criminal risking everything to publish children’s literature was too intriguing for him to let the chance pass.
- He was suspicious of Lemony at first, but started trusting him when they were around book five. Mr. Editor started believing he was a truly good person with good intentions and innocent of what he was accused of. Then he got to read the draft of book eight, with all the confessions, which made him realize he knew nothing of Lemony. I am writing a fic about this.
- Lemony tries to be all mysterious, but when he is not out of the city doing research, he mostly stays in the same small apartment, of which Mr. Editor has not only the address but a spare key as well.Â
- Mr. Editor visits him constantly and his visits almost always start with “what the heck, Lemony?”. Usually, it refers to the contents of one of his books, or to the fact that Lemony completely ignores all duties related to his books except for writing them. Sometimes, it refers to some careless public action, or to the state of the apartment, or to the state the Editor finds Lemony in. A few times it is only to keep the habit.
- Lemony doesn’t want to have anything but a purely professional relationship to his Editor, as everyone who gets close to him gets in heavy danger. But Mr. Editor is not having any of it.
- I mentioned the state the Editor finds Lemony in sometimes. Lemony has some hard days in which he feels especially down, with no motivation to work or to even get up from whatever place he slept on (usually a messy, paper covered couch, or the seat at his working table). He gets overwhelmed by loss and grief and a feeling that his work is for nothing and that everything will stay horrible no matter what he does. The Editor at first has no idea of what to do, since he can’t relate to Lemony’s life experiences at all, but he starts researching about mental health and tries to do whatever he can to help.
- It’s hard for him to convince Lemony to get out of the apartment, or to even open his curtains, because he is also very scared and convinced that his enemies could be anywhere, but the Editor manages to sometimes. They walk together, or go to a nearby restaurant for some root beer or another drink.
- (They never get tea because the one time they did, Lemony started acting very weirdly after the Editor got sugar with his. They don’t talk about it. The Editor eventually understands, after book twelve.)
- The Editor has constant headaches since he started working with Lemony but he doesn’t regret it.
- The Editor sometimes literally drags Lemony around.
- They got drunk together once. It was a whole night of only making fun of each other’s names.
- Lemony never calls the Editor by his first name. It’s always “Mr. Editor”. At first, it is to keep the distance between them, later it’s just because it would feel weird to do it.
- The Editor calls Lemony in many different ways, depending on his mood.Â
- Mr. Editor can easily tell if a letter supposedly from Lemony is real or fake. He never got it wrong.
- Mr. Editor sent many letters to Lemony, both to his apartment and to many temporary addresses. Lemony keeps them all but never answered any.
- After The End, the Editor once asked jokingly if he was a volunteer now. Lemony replied, very serious, that he could be if he wanted to. The Editor made a comment about matching tattoos, to which he received as answer an awful stare and an embarrassing silence.
- The Editor was one of the first people Lemony showed willingly his tattoo to in years, and one of the few non-volunteers to ever see it.
- It kills Mr. Editor inside that he can’t publicly defend Lemony from the accusations he keeps receiving.
- Whenever Mr. Editor shows any negative emotion to Lemony, the first thing Lemony says is “You know you don’t need to do this. You can leave me any time.”
- (It also kills Mr. Editor inside to hear it.)
- Even after their work together was finished, they kept in touch. This was helpful when Lemony decided to publish again. No riddles or crazy codes to get the manuscripts this time.
(Real life publishing situations do not affect my hcs let me be happy with my writer and editor otp)
Hey OP?
I wasn’t invested until you hit “ Lemony never calls the Editor by his first name. It’s always “Mr. Editor”. At first, it is to keep the distance between them, later it’s just because it would feel weird to do it.” because that is my absolute favorite pairing trope.
I was trying so hard not to ship in this fandom.
I guess I’m stuck now.
Hi I'm M, I'm on mobile, and I've taken enough allergy meds to make myself think that this is a good use of this meme.
Everyone is like “where is the sugar bowl?” or “what does the sugar bowl contain?”
But has anyone asked “how does the sugar bowl feel?”
Well, judging by how everyone else in this series seems to feel, I'd feel pretty confident in saying that it doesn't feel particularly good.
Okay ASOUE Fandom,
Let’s get to know each other. Reblog this with your Name, Star Sign, and Favorite Character. I’ll start. Gabby, Aires, and Klaus
Nate, libra and Frank & Ernest denouement
lex, cancer + kit snicket
Traci, Sagittarius, Moxie Mallahan!
Amanda, Aries, and it’s a tie between Violet and Lemony.
Thais, Libra, Klaus
Biddy, Aries, Violet
Isabel, Sagittarius, Lemony
M, Cancer, and younger me related a lot to Klaus
I kind of want to take a second to say a little bit about the Austere Academy and how I processed it as a youngin because I have ramblings to sort through and I don't want to commit to assigning a notebook to be for personal thoughts about things.
For context, Past M took way longer than was needed to read that book.
I don't quite remember how long it actually took because my brain dumps all information it doesn't immediately decide is needed into the flaming pits of Hell, but I do know that I got about halfway through it at normal pace, put a bookmark into it, and didn't pick it up again for over a month. That was in no way normal behavior for me at the time (I wasn't cycling through being either too distracted, too busy, or too drained to read for the sake of reading back then), and this was the only book in ASOUE that I did this with intentionally. I passionately disliked the Austere Academy at the time, and it is still definitely not a book I go to when I want to reread something.
In reviews of the book and its episodes in the Netflix adaptation, people seem to mention how they find much of what goes on in the boarding school absolutely, completely out there beyond the realm of plausibility. Nero making the students eat like dogs for being late to class? The whole school having an anti-orphan policy? Carmelita being allowed to harass anyone she wants to? Preposterous.
I didn't really think so as a younger person.
In the present day, I know that a lot of Nero's policies would not be considered legal, and that I personally cannot speak for the administration in private schools as a whole, but, as a small human, I recognized a lot of how the school around me worked in the pages of tAA. Largely in regards to Carmelita at the time, but now I see some of the teachers' behavior in teachers I have (or have previously had).
It isn't a big plot twist that Carmelita is essentially allowed to mistreat her peers however much she likes. While there are theories about why she acts like this regarding how her parents raised her, the school does not make any real effort to curb unacceptable and actively harmful behaviors that she exhibits (implied to be because Nero is an incompetent, malicious, self-centered fool who can't make any efforts to manage the children under his "care" properly). This is not something that strikes me as outlandish at all, as I've seen students get off with barely a slap on the wrist for actively bullying others, while other students are reprimanded considerably more aggressively for standing up for themselves. I've been the student getting reprimanded for standing up for myself. Hell, I've been the student getting reprimanded far worse for not being able to focus well and for reading when I wasn't supposed to than a lot of the kids who would target myself and others for being different could expect for long-term bullying a student (not me, a classmate who they also didn't like) into transferring entirely into home schooling.
A lot of what I'm about to discuss is my personal experience when I was 10 years old. I would have been beginning to read ASOUE around the time, as my parents decided that I needed to read things that were not the 32+ book long series I'd developed a strong hyperfixation on at that point. Information needed to provide context for some of what I'm going to talk about includes:
I have ADHD. I was actively being medicated + seeing a counselor at the time.
I experienced intense hyperfixations on content that was not considered socially acceptable by my peers and lacked the social filters to avoid constantly infodumping about said hyperfixations in conversation.
I had the motor skills of a recently deceased animal at the time; this was most noticable when I ran, as I galloped awkwardly instead of running like a human. I legitimately didn't know how to run properly.
During my fifth grade year, I was placed in a class with no friends, under a teacher who didn't actually require that students respected anyone in the room other than herself. I was repeatedly placed into groups of students who actively bullied me, even in front of the teacher, without punishment. In spite of me having far fewer issues with any other people in the class that this teacher would occasionally, by some miracle, group me with, she never seemed to grasp that forcing me to interact with people who would mock me, kick me under the table, and point-blank tell me that I was worthless was a bad idea. These kids didn't get let off the hook for a lack of me reporting incidents or them concealing their nonsense particularly well; I'd talk to the teacher in private about them, but she never made any attempt to pull them aside and say anything to them about issues. The teacher didn't take my claims seriously, despite them often doing these things in front of her. The only time that things went to a really serious phase was when I wound up being accused by one of these kids of telling him to fuck off. The teacher pulled me aside, made a big deal about the accusation, and wound up sending me to the office when I disagreed with her.
I'd told this kid to back off because he was continuing a running joke at my expense about how I was the horse girl since I didn't run correctly.
The principal, the former Vice Principal who got a promotion and was not given a new VP due to budget cuts, heard me out and called the guy accusing me and one of the other guys who was in on the joke up to her office, where she lectured them and forced them to apologise. And did nothing else, despite hearing nine months of shit they and a girl in this class had been pulling. The guy who accused me was removed from the school for the remainder of the year shortly after for bringing a taser onto campus and attempting to tase other kids with it. The second guy and the girl remained assholes for the duration of the year, still not getting punishments beyond a stern talking-to. I got the school's equivalent of detention for reading during the wrong parts of the day.
The administration of Prufrock Prep's lack of response to Carmelita (and her behavior overall, if I'm to be completely honest) were too real for Past M. I couldn't deal with that at the time, so I didn't.
On a more recent note, I had a teacher a few years ago who talked about a lot of inappropriate stuff with his class of 14 year olds, a teacher who would give us nonsense essay prompts and take planned absences while leaving her subs to explain that we had multiple group projects to do in class at once in separate groups, and a Spanish teacher who made students who didn't pay attention during her classes too many times buy her candy to make up points that she'd dock them.
TL;DR:
I didn't like tAA because Carmelita was too real for younger me, and I've had teachers who lined up too well with teachers in tAA after reading it.
I know that as soon as I close this book, I'm gonna know exactly what I rummaged through the Infinite Abyss of my closet to find a relatively empty notebook to write down.