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@waitress-rants-blog
So this guy the other day came in with two friends on a Sunday and had not booked, I found them a table and they had a lovely time. At the end they tipped and one came up to the bar and asked my manager if he could buy a bottle of wine and have it behind the bar for the waitress who said she liked red wine to share with her friends she worked with .... how bloody lovely :) Thank you to that guy I really enjoyed it and what a lovely thought :)
We are in a rush
Hey guess what, if you are in a rush, EAT EARLIER or at least only order on course, do not order starters mains and desserts, and then shout at me because you are in a rush, it isnt my fault its your get the fuck out!
Oh dear
I was running around so much today I didn't realize I needed to pee until I literally peed a little god love the close down
So this lady had booked a table of 12 at the restaurant I work at, and as we confirmed the reservation she was asked “are there any special dietary requirements, or allergies we should be aware of so we can accommodate for you” we also sent her copies of the menus so she could pass them out for her family to look at as we require pre orders for tables larger than ten.
She arrives (without the pre order we asked for but okay whatever) and tells us that her child is gluten intolerant, and needed a special menu (This is why we ask ahead of time so we can prepare one but again whatever I will get you a special menu) the menu has about 5 main dishes on it, but tells us her daughter (who is about seven years old) wont eat any of it, she didn't even show her daughter the menu by the way. So instead she orders her fish and chips. Fish and chips. A meal FULL of gluten, perhaps the meal with the most gluten in it on the menu. I asked her if she was sure and explained that it was definitely NOT gluten free, even offered to make her fish without the batter, but she refused saying her daughter would not eat it without the batter. Okay wtf.
After double checking that the mother was happy for us to serve her daughter a meal full of gluten even though she was gluten intolerant, I had to stand and watch a girl aged 7 eating something I knew was bad for her, because her mother couldn’t be bothered dealing with her.
I bet if I accidentally served her something with gluten in it I would probably lose my job but it is fine for her to purposefully harm her child because she cant be bothered.
This world -_-
The Super Bowl
You are fully booked?
Well what am I meant to do now, I have already parked and I’m hungry.
Why do people lie to me about buying a drink when I have already said you can use the toilet for free. Like now you have to walk past me, and you just lied, I know it, you know it, now we both feel awkward as I wave goodbye.
Hey, in that ask about weird customers it seems like you're making fun of mentally ill/disabled people. Its your blog, you can do that if you want but if that was your intent I'd like to know so I can unfollow as it makes me uncomfortable :)
Hello no of course not I see I didn't put enough explaintion in that answer before the woman who screamed was just a drunk woman who said she hated peas and because she saw some thought it would be funny to start screaming and ranting and the man I spoke about only starts talking to himself when he has had about four whiskys before that he is completely sober doesn't do it I would never make fun of anybody with any kind of mental disorder
what was I doing
Anybody ever just stare at the till, completely forgetting what they where meant to be doing but just needing that few moments of zone out time.
Who's the wierdest customer(s) you've ever gotten?
There are so many I have had a woman who was screaming at the table because another person had peas on their plate, but the weirdest must have been a regular who comes in drunk and smelling of pee all the time and he a speaks to the voices in his head and tells me they like me :’)
my career plan is to befriend an eccentric elderly billionaire who tries to relive their youth through me by supporting me financially, naming me in their will and moving me into the guest house of their mansion so that we can drink whiskey in the orchard whilst they give me important life advice
Seems perfectly sound to me why are more people not doing this
Please do not touch the staff
Staff are not cuddly toys, please refrain from touching them, they are also not strippers or prostitutes so you should NEVER think it is okay to grab, grope, proposition, or leer at the servers, this is gross and what is even worse is when you act like they should be playing along for your fun and EVEN WORSE offering a tip if they do. Get all the way to fuck if you are one if these people, I get paid to wait on tables, not to be treated like a night walker.
Confessions
If you have ever thought “I wonder if servers really do that ?”
Feel free to ask me any questions, I have seen pretty much everything you could think of and will be very honest, sometimes the jokes and stereotypes are true. I will start you off.
You have no idea how many unclean fingers touch your food before it gets to you.
This post only applies to serving staff in the U.K as the wage and tipping system is different from many other places.
1. Only tip if you genuinely enjoyed your service, serving staff in the UK (should) earn at least minimum wage which varies depending on age, tips are awesome and a huge help in a hard job that only pays min wage, but at the end of the day if the server wants this lovely perk, they need to provide good service and earn it (be aware most tips are shared and if one server has been bad but the others have been amazing please still tip and it is not our fault if one person has had an off day.
2. All tips are appreciated, however, please do not insult us (yes it is insulting) by calling us over and throwing 20p at us and acting like you are the reason we are able to eat this week.
3. Please don’t tell us you will ‘sort us out’ at the end this is awkward and makes us feel like we are begging for scraps
4. Always ask if the staff will receive their card tips, also if their tips are shared as you don’t want your money going anywhere else than intended.
5. remember some staff work in the background and may not be seen by you but have done just as much work (the bar tenders, runners, glass collectors etc.)
Thank you for tips we do really appreciate it :)
Think about it
If your a dick we tell every single member of staff and therefore nobody will take your complaint seriously, if your really nice you get free stuff
Don't do it
It’s not okay to leave without paying. Ever. Even if you did not enjoy the meal, complain to the management and if it is a valid reason you probably won’t have to pay anyway, but if you just leave it is me the waitress who gets in trouble, not the chef who cooked it or anybody else, just me.
Somebody ordered a medium glass of wine the other day, and then asked me to top it up a bit for them at the able, well no sir you can’t order a specific measurement of wine and then ask for more for free, buy a large jesus !
I pay your wages
Twat
