*Beep* *Boop*

Age:27 Pronouns:She/them 🇨🇦 A true Tumblr Goblin whom desires Bubble tea and spaghetti

[megafaunatic]

ok mouse.

[beemovieerotica]

thank god for american public transit !!! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

[lastvalyrian]

You get on the bus and then everyone does the Flintstones thing

[vc-allthetime]

if you’re on tumblr and over the age of 24 it means the mental illness won

[andjablogge]

[kumboochies]

[artyphex]

“There are no female aliens in our game because we don’t know how to make a female version of this alien” You know that alien you just designed? That male alien? Give it a female voice actor and have characters refer to it as she. That’s it. That’s literally all you have to do 

Make her shorter if you must

Make her BIGGER if you aren’t a coward 

[moonwatcher13]

Take your male alien bodytype, make her like 4 feet taller, give her an extra set of arms and sharper teeth, and as muscular as shit.

Boom.

[skywalkerchick1138]

[lemonsharks]

Give her natural camouflage and make the man like this

Make them exactly the same size and shape but different colors

Give him a huge flock of babies following him around to show off what a great lay he is

Surprise mPreganté

Exactly the same but one of them has a cool hat (you decide which)

Give her a sensible haircut for successful hunting while he has a big dumb mullet so big and dumb the food can see him coming and book it

Please just for the love of pie do not begin and end with boobs

[frenzyarts]

I’m a magician in the sheets 😏 *pulls a rabbit out of my pussy*

[give-grian-rights]

-Mary Toft, 1726

[the-dumb-smart-friend]

Hold on I need to look something up

[the-dumb-smart-friend]

What

[give-grian-rights]

yeah. sorry

[mclennonyaoi]

cardinal sin….? no…. they wouldn’t…. would they?

[mclennonyaoi]

not a malicious bone in his body.

[qwopflop]

Think again..

[virginiagreene]

Every bone in his body is malicious

[crazycatsiren]

You know what?

My ancestors would have wanted pasteurization, vaccines, antibiotics, disinfectants, birth control, psychiatric medications, pain management, anesthesia. My ancestors would have wanted to be able to keep their loved ones around longer, and not lose them too early/too soon to childbirths, injuries, bacterial infections, mental illnesses, and diseases that are curable and/or preventable in our modern day life.

Modern medicine saves lives.

[yarrowthewitch]

In fact, we know they did want these things, because they invented them. They gave them to us out of generations of struggling to understand and make use of nature itself. "Ancestral knowledge" includes the unglamorous things like germ theory, the functioning of the immune system, and how to manufacture lifesaving vaccines. It's not just magical or mystical or remote, it's present in our lives at every moment. It's the reward of human connection: the sum total of human discovery and the boundless ingenuity of human invention, surrounding us at all times with absolute miracles made banal by their familiarity.

If we reject modern medicine, then we reject all the labors and trials our ancestors went through for us; we reject our very nature.

Please, for your ancestors' sake: vaccinate your kids, and take your goddamn medicine.

[ruinedchildhood]

[ruinedchildhood]

[shithowdy]

real adult™ tip from a real adult™ with executive dysfunction

do stuff while waiting for other stuff

like that sounds intuitive and vague but so much of the day is spent in a period of wait and if you struggle to motivate yourself to do things then this is the best time

waiting for your water to boil? bag up your garbage. waiting for your coffee to drip? wipe down your counters. roommate taking up the bathroom? scoop the cat box. waiting for your food to cook in the microwave? do however many dishes you can while it’s in there. 

waiting is the perfect time to do a limited amount of something for yourself where you would be otherwise just standing around doing fuck-all

[maddiebiscuits]

THIS IS REALLY HELPFUL!

[vaspider]

I actually turn this into a game!

“How many chores can I do while the water is boiling for my tea?”

“Can I put away the dishes and wipe the counters before my lunch finishes reheating?”

“Can I sweep the floor AND change the laundry while the dogs are out back?”

You can totally do this! If you make it like a game, also, you will get better at it, and you can be like ‘yes, now I put away the dishes AND wiped out the sink before my water boiled, I am a level 2 Adult!’

[the-haiku-bot]

“How many chores can

I do while the water is

boiling for my tea?”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[just-shower-thoughts]

It was kind of a dick move to create animals that require air, then confine them to the freaking ocean

[water-based-introspection]

If you are talking about dolphins they used to be wolf like creatures that due to scarcity of food they had to hunt in water so they slowly evolved into water mammals, dolphins still have claw bones but they are unnecessary and dolphins will get rid of them with time and will develop abilities to breath under water

(This also partially applies to whales)

[actuallyjuststealingmemes]

They were what now?

[oppa-homeless-style]

[island-delver-go]

[thedevilsofficialblog]

Mother Nature, come out here I just want to talk

[defydamage]

[columbojumpscare]

Whales are actually Ungulates, more so hippos, entelodons, etc…

Meaning they were somewhat related to big celebrities such as Daedon (the “hell pig”) and Andrewsarchus.

The appearence of the first ancestors of whales probably looked like a small hoofed thing called Indohyus.

(Illustration by julio lacerda)

(illustration by Tiffany Turill)

Basically they went from tiny hoofed herbivore to bigger hoofed carnivore to crocodile-like thing to seal-like things to big sea predators.

[mapelie]

The went back from the no bone zone as an aquatic boned animal

[just-shower-thoughts]

[mulderscully]

THE X-FILES | 6.02

[dragon-png]

american maid cafe review

[sourcreammachine]

[rifa]

Realized I have a naked rat and a small piano

Here's Harry banging out the tunes, April 13th 2023

[chongoblog]

ITS APRIL 13 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

FETCH ME NEIL

[chongoblog]

[killz0ne3-deactivated20250521]

Some of you guys have never burned a CD and it shows

[killz0ne3-deactivated20250521]

Some of you guys don't even realise I don't mean setting a CD on fire

[fleshdyke]

always remember gay men are the reason we dont have to pay for public bathrooms in canada

[the-text-party]

WAIT HUH??? IM CANADIAN????? WHY HAVE I NEVER HEARS ABOUT THIS UNTIL NOW??????

[fleshdyke]

two gay men got arrested for fucking in a public bathroom but they argued since you had to pay for it it was a hotel and it was fine. their defence worked and we dont have to pay for bathrooms anymore

[hieronymus-botch]

Ok guys I know we want to celebrate victories in queer history but

1. Googling "Canada gay sex pay toilets" just brings up a bunch of reblogs of this post

2. There does not seem to have been any sort of norm of public toilets in Canada charging money to use in the 20th century

3. I am neither Canadian nor a lawyer but I find it extremely hard to believe that there is any jurisdiction on earth where charging money to use a public toilet makes it legally constitute a hotel room and therefore OK to have sex in.

[fleshdyke]

thats because i lied about this

[kaijuno]

Sacred image

[pepsimansthickjuicymeatyschlong]

Look a this photograph

[kaijuno]