making a new introduction post cause i lost my old one
hi! i'm Zoya, sometimes FlowerGirl or just flower, call me whichever
my pronouns are she/it if you're tma and I like you (this includes tma mutuals even if we've never talked), she/her otherwise
i'm Very Autistic, and not in the quirky way. my main special interests are the usamerican legal system, math, fire emblem three houses, and magic the gathering drafts.
other interests include Arknights, d&d, theatre (especially shakespeare), and writing music
formerly plural (it's a very long story), rip Anastasia I will always remember you.
survivor of anorexia and a failed suicide attempt, doing my best to spread awareness and fight stigma when I can.
most of my posts are untagged but when I start using tags I will add them here:
# eating disorder tag - anything related to eating disorders, eating disorder recovery, or eating more/gaining weight in general
# ✡️ - anything judaism related
I might be a dog, but I am not a puppy
# me core - posts that I find relatable in some way
firm reminder that when youre hitting people in the face for horny reasons you need to need to need to make sure their mouth is fully shut. i dont care how hot slapping something out of someones mouth is, or slapping them to shut them up. if theyd like to keep using their jaw in the future you must make sure its shut first. this can be really hot too ofc for those with open hearts and minds
In case you weren't aware, the goal of a boycott is to significantly impact the bottom line of a business to pressure it into stopping some specific harmful behavior.
This means that a disorganized "don't support this" with no clear timeframe, no clear demand being put forward, and no organized effort to reach the actual customers of the business... is pretty unlikely to achieve anything.
"Boycotts never achieve anything" factoid is actually a statistical error. Historically, boycotts have been an enormously successful pressure mechanism for collective action. Boycotts georg, a social media user who launches a million poorly strategized boycotts every day with no thought given to target selection or actionable demands, is an outlier adn should not have been counted.
Since my beloved wife got a breast reduction we have a nightly ritual where I smear goop (anti-scar cream) on their incision lines. The first goop we had was from the surgeon's office and it was a silicone base that was pretty nice, but did have a tendency to build up a residue afterward. We asked the office about buying more and they pretty much said to get whatever as long as we were getting something on it. They also told us theirs was a "spendy" $50 which we didn't think was that bad.
So my wife bought a different product ($30) and we were both put out that it came in such a small tube for the price. We decided we'd use it up before going back and getting the first goop again, even if it was more expensive. We did like that the small tube didn't have any residue afterward, but for the price we paid it still seemed like a rip off.
We have been. So wrong.
The tube has appeared like it should be empty for weeks. Yet every night, we convene in the bathroom for nightly goop. I hold out my finger and my wife squeezes the tube. Every night, there is enough.
When we first thought it was almost done we bought another tube. Even if it didn't last as long we liked that there wasn't a residue with it. But now that the first one still isn't empty it's clearly very good bang for our buck, because it is frankly staggering both of us that we still keep getting more out of what appears to be an empty tube.
Early on I joked it was a Hanukkah miracle but at this point eight days was over last month and we're gonna have to make a new holiday to liken this phenomenon to because this is the energizer bunny of goop.
Every night now we wait with bated breath to see if this is finally the end of its supply. Every night, there is plenty. I told my wife it would be funny if I were secretly filling it a little bit to keep a long prank going but honestly the opening is so goddamn tiny that we couldn't possibly fill it on our own. We shall see when it's reign ends, but either way, we definitely got our money's worth.
Look, we all know this is true. But there isn't a SOURCE for this, and the graph itself is basically illegible beyond "ooh colors". If we want to be good stewards of our informational resources, we need to cite our sources.
From a reverse image search, I found the website Show Your Stripes, run by the University of Reading in the UK, which is likely where the above graph originated. It provides temperature data for various regions of the world from approximately 1900-2025. For example, here are graphs for Canada, India, and Papua New Guinea:
All clearly show a sharp rise in temperature beginning around approximately the 1980s, which corresponds with the graph in OP's post. But now we know where this data came from, and we can verify its validity accordingly.
a doxx just went up for L / transgender voices project. it is faked by transgender voices project herself. I was aware of this ahead of time because she could not stop jokerposting. do not trust any doxx you see of L
I have been working on a big proof to get out ahead of this plan with the parody blog, and that is going up in a few minutes. I kept this information under wraps so we could drop the whole proof at once without her deleting evidence. if the doxx is of a real person at all, it is not the L of transgender voices project
it shows where the person behind TGVP jokerposted about the fake doxx plan, and it connects together transgender voices project and the blogs sweetrapisteyes and isuggestsexualassault, providing evidence these are all run by the same person
I'd like to point out, by the way, that she uses her blog isuggestsexualassault to pose as a transfem and go around telling people on tumblr they should be raped. not remotely shocking behavior for the person running a blog exclusively for stories of transfems committing sexual assault
a.k.a. L is anhithemisken is tifyagmi is sweetrapisteyes is isuggestsexualassault is not a good person. Do not believe anything she posts.
For a list of the things L has said, done, and believes, click here. For proof that L and Anhithe are the same person, click here, here, and here.
anhithemisken/tifyagami
Shortly after anhithemisken went password protected, the url was changed to tifyagami. Someone, perhaps Anhithe/L, posted the password for the blog on lolcow.farm. Mousidy and I knew of this, but kept it under wraps for a while so she wouldn't realize we had access. Presumably feeling confident after a while that only lolcow users had the password, she started jokerposting again, now more explicitly for her audience of lolcowers, using "kek" and other lingo common on the website. Her new url, "tifyagami," was taken from the nickname the lolcowers had been using for her. For an archive of these new posts up until August 6th, click here. Unfortunately she does not have reblogs enabled, so screenshots are the best we can do for archival purposes.
First, there's this post. Once again she is outright admitting to being L.
Then, in this post she then lays out what her plan is, and what exactly is going to be "worse than a note could ever be."
I was content not to play her games anymore, but seeing as she is contemplating measurable harm to someone, I did not feel comfortable staying silent about it. If L is ever "doxxed," know that it is fake. If she ends up targeting someone, please do everything you can to support that person. Between this and the epilepsy suicide gifs, its clear she does not care about the harm she does to people.
And here's another post. An anhithe original, if you will.
This is the lineart from a drawing titled "caricature of a transfeminist," and it was not originally posted by anhithemisken. It was first posted by another blog and was deleted before this lineart version was posted on tifyagami. Both mousidy and I had seen this original version before it was deleted, around the time when it was first posted. As soon as we saw the lineart, we knew where it came from.
sweetrapisteyes
Hello, Mona :)
L/Anhithe/Mona is a fascinating person because she has several unique traits. She holds beliefs that are contradictory to each other, she is convinced she is always right, and she thinks that across contexts there are things that are "true" but which you can't say without being silenced. This behavioral cocktail is seen across all three blogs: transgendervoicesproject, tifyagami/anhithemisken, and sweetrapisteyes.
I have archived the most pertinent of her posts on another blog, alongside screenshots of the recent tifyagami posts.
sweetrapisteyes, L, and Anhithe all have the same or similar personal traits
In her pinned post, sweetrapisteyes refers to herself as intersex, disabled, and plural. In this post and this post Mona says she was homeless, sexually abused, trafficked, and part of a cult. All of these are details shared wholly or in part across the three blogs. Here is L on transgendervoicesproject saying she is intersex, disabled, plural, homeless, and part of a cult. And here is Anhithe saying she is intersex, disabled, homeless, trafficked, and part of a cult.
Now, why would she share the same details across all these blogs and risk someone connecting the dots? My belief, informed by a lot of her posts on tifyagami and especially her original anhithemisken posts, is that she is driven by a genuine desire to be heard and understood. She stated once on tifyagami that L is a character she plays who is very much based on her. It makes sense that she would change superficial details while still including the details that are most important to her sense of self, as she wants to be heard and understood, even while playing a character.
I want to pause for a second and say that Mousidy and I haven't gotten to this point without developing empathy for her...despite all the harm she has caused and continues to cause. I won't lie, I feel bad for someone whose self hatred is so intense that she'd do all this to convince herself that the reason people abandon her isn't because it's her fault, it's only because actually really she's not afraid to say what you're not supposed to say!!1! All of this is digital self harm. Look, if you're reading this now L/Anhithe/Mona/whoever, I know you'll say this is the literal same thing as being told to kill yourself, but get help. You don't have to live like this.
A major reason Mousidy and I decided to move forward with this was to prevent her from successfully carrying out her planned fake doxx of L. We want to get out ahead of the fake doxxing before someone can be targeted. Connecting her blogs together isn't harassment, as I'm sure she will claim, this is an attempt to stop the harm she is planning.
sweetrapisteyes has the same mousidy obsession...
Across sweetrapisteyes you can find many posts about mousidy. Obviously there is the caricature connection, but there are plenty of other posts too. Here she is screenshotting a mousidy post in a failed attempt to dunk on her. Here she is once again failing to dunk on Mousidy. And here she is arguing with mousidy (and losing lmao).
and the same racism...
Here she is making a point shockingly close to what she's argued on transgendervoicesproject vis a vis feeling like she can't be racist towards immigrants without being called racist. And here is sweetrapisteyes reblogging a post that is again, the same rhetoric, and is just truly insanely racist.
and the same "incubator class" ideology...
Here are some posts by sweetrapisteyes, and some by anhithe, and a couple more by L over on transgendervoicesproject. I recommend reading through them as you'll see the same ideological threads. But here are some quotes from those posts where she refers to people who are able to become pregnant as "incubators" or as part of the "incubator class."
As sweetrapisteyes: "if you are labeled an incubator you're basically fucked for life, and if you try to align yourself with incubators as an inseminator you're gonna have a bad time, and if you as an incubator try to escape you'll ahve an even WORSE time."
As tifyagami: "impregnators, then, explicitly benefit from the subjugation of the incubator class" and for good measure, also "if an incubator rebels against the natural order of things, something must be seriously wrong with it. especially if it wants to have power equal to the incubator class."
As transgendervoicesproject: "lowkey its impregnators vs the incubator class...the exact second the system perceives you as part of the incubator class, the trap just snaps shut on you anyway and they don't care how you identify."
In short, sweetrapisteyes has the same hatred for mousidy, the same style of bigoted thinking, the same view of pregnancy as the greatest axis of oppression (using the phrase "incubator class" across all three blogs), the same conviction that she's always right, the same refusal to believe that she's a TERF, and on top of all this, her personal details all line up with those shared on her other blogs. Sweetrapisteyes is the same person as L and the same person Anhithe.
And here are some other connections.
On transgendervoicesproject "L" has compared mousidy to charles manson, and on sweetrapisteyes she has posted about charles manson multiple times.
Here is sweetrapisteyes saying "i dont think theyve read whipping girl" posted only one day after the initial start of transmascvoicesproject, during which people routinely told her to read Whipping Girl.
Across all three blogs she makes reference to baeddels. On transgendervoicesproject here, in the tags of her suicide-epilepsy gif post on tifyagami here , and on sweetrapisteyes here. A note on the link for tifyagami: to avoid any harm I've linked to a screenshot of the post on an archive. There is no flashing.
On their own, none of these things are definitive, but all together they paint a clear picture. L is Anhithe is Mona. Oh, and she is also Momo.
isuggestsexualassault and isuggestrape
I had a feeling that these blogs were hers, but did not have definitive enough proof, and so I wasn't planning on including this. Then, while writing all this, she made this post on tifyagami.
Kind of annoyed she spoiled it, but hey. Eye for an eye, right? Anyways, knowing that both of these people are her makes this interaction on transgendervoicesproject very interesting. Oh, and fun fact, while arching sweetrapisteyes, isuggestrape blocked me at the same time. Interesting.
Summary
Whoever this person is, she does not care about anyone but herself. She has shown constant willingness to hurt others and a chronic love of lying. Do not trust what she says or any doxx you see for L.
Restoring my review of the Barbie movie on tumblr. It's one of my most popular reviews on Letterboxd and the last time I posted this, back when Barbie came out, everyone was very appreciative of my review.
I end up complaining about transmascs a lot on here. The reason is that I am not really friends with many cis people irl because of their transphobia, except one or two friends I've had since childhood. And my transfem friends don't antagonise me very much. So basically transmascs make up a sizeable proportion of my social network because they are generally tolerable, but they are also where most of the problems come from because of the dynamics of oppression. It probably looks like I'm fixated on this one demographic, but really it's the fact that the demographic is generally good that means I am friends with them at all.
Anyway, with that out of the way, I want to talk about my trans guy friend Tom (not his real name). Over the last year or so there's been a pattern of:
I say or do something innocent.
He aggressively accuses me of bad behaviour.
I explain that he misinterpreted what happened, but apologise for it all the same and promise to do better.
He grudgingly says "OK".
We never mention it again.
It's got so bad that I panic whenever I get a message from him, and if it is one of his aggressive ones I go into a days-long anxiety spiral.
On Saturday I arranged a trip to Trans Pride in London for a group of trans people near me. I didn't want to arrange it because I'm burnt out, but there were a few people I knew who wanted to go but didn't want to go alone, so I felt I had a duty to arrange something for their sake.
One of them was a wheelchair user, so I made this detailed plan for how we would navigate our journey to and from the march avoiding steps and calling ahead to train stations to warn them if they needed to get a manual ramp ready for us. I posted this and Tom read it and thumbs upped it. In the end the wheelchair user couldn't come, so we used a different route instead.
On the way back from the march, I made a comment about how difficult the route we were taking would be if we had a wheelchair with us, because the station we were in had a load of steps. I also explained how there was a different route I had planned for wheelchair users. I was wrecked after that day, and honestly just wanted a week of being left alone to recover.
The next day, Tom messaged me to say he was really upset about the ableist comment I had made and he called me a hypocrite because I have previously criticised others for ableism. It turned out he interpreted "this would be really impossible with a wheelchair" as "wheelchair users are such a burden". He is not a wheelchair user himself fyi, although I have been in the recent past, and he knows this.
I apologised that he had been upset by what I said, but explained that my words didn't mean that, they were a reference to the plan I had made about wheelchair accessible journeys. He claimed he hadn't heard me explain this at the time, and he didn't remember reading my post about accessibility that he had thumbs-upped.
I was obviously in a spiral at this point because, not only was I the only person in our network who had shown any interest at all in helping a wheelchair user (which Tom could've done himself, but didn't), but also I was the only one being called out and called a hypocrite when I hadn't even done anything wrong.
My wife saw my reaction to this and she got annoyed on my behalf. She has seen how much I panic around messages from Tom and, since she was actually at Trans Pride and present at the time I made the "ableist comment" she knew it was bullshit. She sent a message to Tom saying that the way he talks to me is not fair and is totally disproportionate to the alleged offence, and that she has noticed that he never talks to her like that. (She was implying but not stating that there was a transmisogynistic motive behind Tom's different behaviour towards us, since she is cis).
Tom then went berserk. He started accusing my wife and I of talking about him behind his back, and basically accused her of letting me take her phone and harass him on two fronts. I weighed in to say I didn't ask her to get involved, she is just concerned about how he treats me.
There has since been 24 hours of me trying to explain how the way he talks to me is part of a wider context of trans women's actions being uncharitably misinterpreted and blown out of all proportion. I said that he could've said "Hey, what did you mean by this thing you said yesterday?" before going directly to accusations of ableism and hypocrisy which it turned out were unfounded. I said he could talk to me like a friend who cares about and knows me, and not like someone writing a complaint to a dodgy business or their MP.
He then started going into how he has learned a lot about communication styles and he is just doing best practice by naming the harm that was caused, that he is willing to be more gentle in future but that's a concession he is making because of my "fragility and defensiveness to criticism" and he is unhappy that I am not making any concessions in return. Never mind that I immediately apologised and promised to do better, even though I didn't even do anything wrong in the first place.
His position now is that my wife and I have ganged up on him and derailed what was originally a critique of my ableism into a barrage of unfair criticism of him, and we are fragile and defensive and he is sad that people who seemed good on the surface can be so different underneath.
He keeps using therapy-speak and social justice-speak to undermine any attempts by me to point out issues. If he is rude it is "best practice" and I am implied to be uneducated for not knowing that. If I mention something he did wrong, it's "derailing". If he accuses me of something I didn't do, it's him "naming the harm that was caused".
All this comes in the context that he has never engaged seriously with "transmisogyny" as a form of oppression, on the many times I've brought it up.
At one point, I was trying to explain why I felt the way he talked to me was unreasonable, so I reached for a recent situation where I felt he had done something wrong to show how I behave if the roles are reversed. I referred to a time 2 weeks ago when he said the world would be a better place if everyone with a Y chromosome died. At the time I thought "Wow, that's gross" but I said nothing because I used the wider context of knowing him to infer that he probably didn't mean it (and honestly I find it hard to call out men's behaviour, because they rarely react well to it). This was probably not the best example, because it's really an example of me being afraid to call him out, but it's what I reached for in the moment.
I brought this up and he said "It was just a joke". A day later I responded to explain how it's a transmisogynistic joke that at best only transfems can make, and it's not appropriate for him to be saying it. He then said "Yeah, I realised it was bad immediately when I said, I probably should've said something at the time."
So the pattern is:
I do something innocent.
He interprets it badly.
He accuses me aggressively.
I explain what I actually said but also apologise and promise to do better anyway.
vs
He does something actually bad.
He doesn't apologise in the moment.
I point it out much later in a different context.
He dismisses it as "just a joke".
I press the point.
He then says he shouldn't have done it.
I don't know how he sees these situations and sees me as the fragile and defensive one.
I have tried to explain to him how transmisogyny so often manifests as uncharitable interpretations of neutral statements that are blown out of all proportion, and that when he sends me a message doing exactly that it sits within the context of how this has been done to me and other transfems for our entire lives, and normally results in social exclusion.
Messages like his accusations are a Pavlovian bell to transfems that warns us social exclusion is coming, we know it because it has happened so many times to us. He says I should go to therapy and not put the burden of my anxiety on him to accommodate my irrational reaction to criticism. He won't accept that it's not irrational.
There's a social group we are both in. At a meet-up a few months ago, a trans girl said "I feel like the word 'bisexual' should perhaps be replaced by 'pansexual' or some other identifier to be more non-binary-inclusive." That's a perfectly normal thing to say, especially because this girl is bi/pan herself, and this discussion point is a very common one in bi/pan circles. After she said that we talked about how the meaning of "bisexual" has changed over time, about descriptive vs prescriptive identifiers, it was a good discussion. Also at this same meet-up, one of the transmasc organisers called all the transfems "guys" (I didn't hear this at the time).
After the meet-up, the same transmasc organiser privately messaged me and the other organisers to say they were concerned about the behaviour of the trans girl who had been saying "biphobic things". A few hours later, the trans girl (unprompted) posted a message in the group chat to say she was sorry if anyone had interpreted her statement about bisexuality badly, she said she is nervous and sometimes says things wrong, is really sorry and will try to do better. I calmed her down by saying that, as someone who has identified as "bisexual" myself, simply because it's the identity name we used when I was young, I thought her comments were perfectly reasonable and she had absolutely nothing to worry about. That drama blew over. Then a month or so later the transmasc organiser randomly mentioned that they felt bad for calling transfems guys at that meeting but didn't feel like they should apologise for it.
I think it is clear that the trans girl's reaction in this situation is a trauma response by someone who has been repeatedly socially excluded for her words being misinterpreted and blown out of proportion. She is panicking hard that she's going to get kicked out of the group, and wants to apologise in advance to head that off, even though she did nothing wrong. Meanwhile the transmasc actually did something wrong but didn't bother apologising and no one brought it up and no one expects any consequences for them.
That is the difference between being perpetually on the edge of social exclusion vs not being, that is transmisogyny in action.
Tom refuses to see it in this light. He only sees that he called out my ableism and suddenly my wife and I had turned the tables and were calling him out. He doesn't realise that him being called out this time is the result of a pattern of behaviour that's gone on for a year, it's the release of a build up of so many times he's called me out when I did nothing wrong and I had to apologise anyway to calm him down.
Perhaps it would be fragility if this had happened the first time he unfairly criticised me for something I didn't do. When it's the tenth, and I've been apologetic all the previous times, it's just me finally standing up for myself.
I know I should just stop being friends with him, it's what I would advise anyone else, but it is so hard when you're in the midst of this situation and your social lives are so intertwined as mine and Tom's are. It can be easier to just apologise and let him think he's won, then let the friendship die slowly over months rather than in a blaze of righteous indignation. I still don't know which of these paths to choose but I will have to pick soon.
I used to be a passionate advocate for transmasc lesbians. My logic was this: lesbianism is a social culture that is defined not by rigid boundaries but by a shared language, in-jokes, memes, signifiers, etc etc. I argued that even a cis man could be a lesbian in theory (but that if "he" is there is definitely something queer going on with "his" gender so "cis man" is probably not the most apt descriptor). I pointed to other examples of queer words whose meaning has changed over time (e.g. "bisexual") to indicate that there is no need to insist on WLW as a definition (or its "non-men" equivalent) even as the reality of the use of the word "lesbian" is shifting right before our eyes. I took a descriptivist approach to "lesbian"="whoever calls themselves a lesbian".
But in all my activity along this line, I never even noticed that not a single transmasc lesbian (nor cis lesbian) had ever reached out to me to say "you are welcome in our community". I was putting in all this work to advocate for a group of people who didn't even want me around, and there is no way in hell they'd put in the same effort for me. I was doing the intellectual work of justifying the inclusion of a group that benefitted from my exclusion.
I think that when I realised that this was happening was when materialism really clicked for me. Who actually is excluded from lesbian spaces? Who actually needs help being included? Who doesn't need that help because they are already included? For all I heard online about the demonisation of transmasculinity, you can't move for transmascs of all stripes in my local lesbian scene, while there are maybe one or two transfems willing to put up with the indignity of how they are treated there.
My views on transmasc lesbians haven't really changed, I still agree with all that in principle. The thing that has changed is I no longer spend time and energy advocating for a group of people who will accept my advocacy only to slam the door in my face.
Trans masc lesbians were instrumental in the implementation of AFAB-only segregationist discrimination within lesbian and queer housing, resources, and spaces. It was not happenstance.
Trans men were accepted into lesbian spaces for as long as trans women were violently excluded; trans men got that privilege by participating in our violent segregation.
The idea that trans men are at all at risk of losing their access to lesbian spaces is not only fucking laughable but it is a psyop to get you to NOT realize how transfems are ACTUALLY systematically discriminated and segregated out of queer, women’s, and lesbian spaces, housing, and resources by TME queer and trans people.
