1) any stretching is better than no stretching
2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable
3) statistically you will never be the worst person at anything, there is always someone in the world who is worse at stuff than you are

oozey mess

if i look back, i am lost
almost home

★

ellievsbear
Sweet Seals For You, Always
RMH
One Nice Bug Per Day

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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
noise dept.
Monterey Bay Aquarium
sheepfilms
Misplaced Lens Cap
AnasAbdin
$LAYYYTER

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

pixel skylines

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@10moonymhrivertam
1) any stretching is better than no stretching
2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable
3) statistically you will never be the worst person at anything, there is always someone in the world who is worse at stuff than you are
In light of recent events, I have begun submitting bug reports when I see mature content labels applied inappropriately to posts, especially if an appeal has been rejected.
Extremely good idea - how are you doing it? Through the contact us option?
Yeah it’s one of the options on the Contact Support form:
for what it's worth: after a few months of submitting help tickets as 'feedback' when i saw a post inappropriately flagged as mature, i tried following this suggestion instead. today i got my first-ever response from tumblr support on this issue, letting me know that a post i'd submitted a ticket before has had its mature content flag removed.
Recently managed to activate the most amazing infodump trap card.
I was driving through Vermont with a friend, and we pulled over at a tiny shop offering Maple Items. We were on the state highway, not the interstate, so "pulling over" meant "squeezing my tiny car into a parking bay the size of a broad highway shoulder."
As we got out of the car, an older woman emerged from behind the building where she had been pruning her roses. She introduced herself as Tammy.
Her shop offered the promised variety of Maple, but also a number of small antiques and a plethora of dog figurines, plaques, and clearly-hand-stitched garden flags.
A huge purple ribbon hung on the wall behind the register, along with many pictures of small dogs. This was no county fair ribbon. It was the size of my torso. The material had the soft sheen of actual silk.
As I placed my purchases on the counter, I asked, "Do you... Breed dogs?"
Yes. She does. She has bred Yorkies for the last 40 years. Her mother bred Yorkies before her. The purple ribbon was from her national championship winning Yorkie.
You may be expecting that the infodump was going to be about Yorkies.
It was not.
It was about 40 years of drama in the Yorkie breeding community. Where – you must understand – the judging at shows is often about who you're in with, not about the dogs. This is especially true when Tammy's opponents win anything.
And Tammy's mother! Well. Phyllis has been on the Yorkie scene since Yorkies were invented. Because of this, many women of equally venerable age hold deep grudges against Phyllis. The sort of grudges that result in episodes of Midsommar Murders.
This led to deep injustices against Phyllis on the part of judges and prevented her dogs from winning so often she retired from the scene. Judging is all about who you're friends with, after all.
After 20 years in hiding, Phyllis – the One True Queen of Yorkie Breeding – hatched a plot. She may have been out of the show circuit, but she was still breeding dogs. She entered an absolutely perfect bitch in the national competition, but sent her with a handler rather than go in person.
None of the usurpers knew who this dog belonged to, and in dog-breeding circles this Does Not Happen. This could have resulted in further injustices, but Phyllis was crafty. She knew this tournament was being judged by a man from the UK, who knew naught of the drama in the US Yorkie Empire.
With these advantages – and being the best dog there – Phyllis's bitch won the highest honor at the show.
Incensed by this insult to their ill-gotten supremacy, the other owners descended on the handler after the show, demanding to know for whom he was working.
"Phyllis," said he.
The name of the overthrown queen evoked horror in the usurpers.
"PHYLLIS!? She's still ALIVE!???"
Yes, Phyllis yet lived, and this bitch – the dog, not the woman – went on to mother Tammy's current dogs. One of whom, Lucy-Fur, is the reincarnation of Tammy's sister (also Lucy). This is certain for two reasons.
Firstly, Sister Lucy absolutely went straight to Hell upon her death, and Lucy-Fur the dog is positively as evil as Sister Lucy was.
Secondly, Sister Lucy always said when she died she wanted to come back as one of Phyllis's dogs because "mom treated the dogs better than us."
*waffle house fight vine voice* Can I please get a projectile weapon?
You want me to turn on automatic software updates? The thing that made Murderbot commit mass murder?
ok see the problem with umineko is. hold on there's an image that explains this
no beatrice.
one of the funniest conversations I ever had with my ex was when they were still getting used to Celsius and asked me "what's 20 degrees?" and instead of converting it, I said "it's the highest your dad will ever let you set the thermostat and when you say you're cold he tells you to put on another sweater, we're not made of money" and they went "oh, 68"
the fact that this reference was that fucking precise was something they went on to tell people about for years.
thank you scherz et al. for bringing us the frogs Mini ature, Mini mum and of course, the Mini scule
get his ass
someone in the UK threw eggs at Charles and was arrested and has been banned from openly carrying eggs in public and has since been sent death threats but their statement on the matter was so fucking good
also let's take a moment to appreciate the picture of this man being arrested
"So my bail conditions were, between my arrest and my trial, were that I wasn't allowed to carry eggs in public." host laughs "Yeah, I know, and so that is in itself like so absurd that it's like right" Host: "I gotta know, is there like a provision for if you're going home from the store? Or are you just, are you just egg-less?" "So the copper who was literally just like making this up at the station says like 'Ok, so your bail condition is: you're not allowed within 500 meters of the king; you're not allowed to carry eggs in public' and then he goes like 'ah actually, like, what 'appens if he wants to buy some eggs?' Ok, so they changed it so it's like, 'You're allowed to carry eggs as long as you're going home from the shops and you've got the receipt" host laughs "And I think, that was more viral than me actually doing it, you know what I mean like, people were like, that's Britain for you, have you got a license for those eggs"
-"The Man Who Egged King Charles", It Could Happen Here, May 18 2023
I'd like to believe this is how it all started.
Haven't even read the thread but I just know it's going to be hilarious
Average drow woman romance experience lmfao
I will not elaborate.
@sergle is correct
i love writing out numbers and then putting them in parentheses like "one (1)" even when i dont need to i think its funny
I love making it even more unnecessary by writing 1 (1)
(having a good week) that’s right. the goal is to increase my baseline. make the spirals shallower until they spin lazily on the surface of the water, lose their suction. im not trying to fix it all at once, im trying to incrementally improve my way into something tolerable. and once im there maybe i can shoot for good
(having a bad week) and in my terrible forge i will temper the flames of ruin
I think kafka’s diaries are the strongest evidence that journaling is not necessarily good for your mental health
it's because he didn't use washi tape
The fursona vent art didn’t help either :(