:V

28 / Wish I was a himbo :/

[infectiouspiss]

girls night we're on our bullshittttt

[themarchingbeetle]

[toriel-2]

you like me...for me..? (blushes) (cums all over the

huh

as you wish lord

[beemovieerotica]

someone on reddit shared texts of her and her husband's exclusive english dialect and it's beautiful

[beemovieerotica]

a linguist is analyzing it

[heylittletomboy]

They Hacked Women

[brightereyes]

[blanklystaringatwalls]

oh goodness! oh dear!! oh no!!!

[circumgutter]

[paperandpencilsandskips]

The Magnanimous Airplane

[kawuli]

well, the ears dropped

[perkwunos]

The Johnny Appleseed they don’t want you to know about

[bigfuckingcrab]

[swaggie2dope]

went to trader joe’s today and my cashier handed me my 2.55 in change and pointed at the clock which read 2:55 and said “look at that. that’s liquid time… serendipity… have a nice ride”

[doctorbluesmanreturns]

[certified-muppet-posts]

certified muppets post

[c3rvida3]

kitten if you don't get daddy his 3D printed sensory slug in the next five seconds you can kiss your grandma's drywall goodbye

[c3rvida3]

This was supposed to be unrebloggable, but I was flying into a gamer rage at the antique store because someone was wearing too much Victoria's Secret Love Spell body spray and it gave me a migraine.

[moveslikekeithrichards]

the role of the person in the passenger seat is not only navigator but secretary as well. you have to type up the drivers messages to random ladies on facebook about cbd cream & google whether that billy joel song was the theme song for that show or not

[moveslikekeithrichards]

you also have to provide a henchmans disdainful scowl at whoever the driver is flipping off in the target parking lot

[the-apocrypha]

other assorted roles may include

retrieval team for objects in the backseat

custodian of the parking garage tickets

"All clear my way"

en-route dining concierge

announcing "Horses!" when there are horses

[lynx-girl]

Don't forget the Tommy Gun

[help-my-ocs-breached-containmen]

You should never forget the Tommy Gun

[thedogeveryonehates]

[moniquill]

[txttletale]

the funniest thing about 'computer, enhance' is that it implies that everyone in those shows has their computer set to Piece Of Shit Blurry Image Mode by default for no fucking reason

[txttletale]

computer activate Useful Mode

[kosmogrl]

I will probably get through this just like I have gotten through everything before but I need to be really stressed and scared first

[qubesos-official]

[transfemme-shelterdog]

French people when you call it bukake and not "nut a la visage" and shibari instead of "corde attacher l'submissive"

[transfemme-shelterdog]

Pisse? In le pantalons???

Mon tabarnak j'vais te décâlisser la yeule, câlice!

[inthefallofasparrow]

[kleinergeist]

You don't even need to study for the Rorschach test, btw, it's super easy. All they do is show you a bunch of stupid pictures of your dad getting eaten by a horse

[hermann-rorschach]

Do not share the answers with your classmates.

[kleinergeist]

Yes Dr Rorschach

Sorry Dr Rorschach

[transmortifried]

idk why people are still trying to do "hear me out"s on tumblr

you could talk about wanting to fuck the space needle on here and people would still call you a poser for insisting on fucking "conventionally attractive architecture" as if that's a coherent, easily-recognizable category

[charlesoberonn]

I want to fuck Antoni Gaudi's unbuilt Hotel Attraction skyscraper design

[anatomizer]

"hear me out" and it's a picture of the most fuckable building you've ever seen. c'mon now.

[thepersonalmossblog]

“hear me out” and it’s the fucking dildopolis