Babygirl I understand social cues that youāve never even heard of (I was raised in a house with no communication skills)
styofa doing anything
we're not kids anymore.

ellievsbear

if i look back, i am lost
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macklin celebrini has autism

Kiana Khansmith
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
DEAR READER
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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Cosmic Funnies
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@anonymous-depressed-figure
Babygirl I understand social cues that youāve never even heard of (I was raised in a house with no communication skills)
Itās okay to fall apart after you thought youād moved on. Itās okay to hit a bad patch after doing so well for awhile. Healing isnāt linear and these things donāt erase your progress or accomplishments youāve made on your journey.
I just want to be a Christmas girly but The Horrorsā¢ļø always get in the way :(
i hope it hurts a little less. day by day. week by week. i hope the ache in your chest eases. maybe it won't entirely, maybe it will. may the thought of feeling joy again alone be enough to keep you going, even if for a while.
not to advertise that i've been neglected but if anyone pays attention to me I am going to be freaking out about it for the rest of the week, then come up with various daydreams about getting more which I will then abandon in shame because I will go back to believing I don't deserve attention
You don't have to be "good enough" for the right people. They will accept you as you are. You don't have to endlessly improve until you're perfect. If people criticize you 24/7 they are not your people.
one of the most important things iāve learned in therapy is that when youāve experienced prolonged trauma in your childhood, pleasure feels uncomfortable. like, not that you donāt feel it, but that when you do feel it thereās an impulse to make it stop, because itās extremely unfamiliar.Ā and pleasure can mean many things, as simple as feeling cozy, and as complex as feeling loved. the neural pathways for feeling good have not had a chance to develop, and the neural pathways for feeling bad are quite practiced. feeling good, too, takes conscious practice.
do u ever walk from a social interaction like damn. this is why i keep my mouth shut most of the time
People who are starved out of conversation will approach it as if it was sacred, people who are starved out of touch experience any touch given to them as the highest form of intimacy, people starved out of gentleness will react to it as if itās an invasion, an attempt to break them down, and people starved out of a community will approach it as if it was a minefield.
hearing gentle parenting kids talk about their healthy childhood and current present urges me to run and slam into a wall few hundred times
One of the things I feel a lot of people without C-PTSD don't assume is that yes, people doing things that remind you of your trauma is triggering, but so is seeing someone - especially a lot of people - loudly being the OPPOSITE. People being caring, appropriate, considerate, stating and telling someone who did a "microtrigger" that you didnt notice to cut it out cause its not right
People being good people about something bad that happened to me sometimes stings and triggers me more because when someone does something similar to the trauma, yes its triggering but its expected and normalized. When someone loudly and unpromptedly states and acts in a way that reminds me that what happened to me was awful and unjust, that is unexpected, that is new and it breaksdown some of the normalization that has served a protective role as much as a perpetuating role.
executive dysfunction in a nutshell
hey if youāre in the U.S. and use food stamps or know somebody who does i found this online cookbook that has recipes for eating well on approximately $4/day :o)Ā
I donāt have food stamps but I need to know how to eat well for $4/day. Thank you for this.
I love this cookbook!
Tips and tricks on how to survive being working class.
Iāve seen this kind of thing before and a lot of them are full of random weird shit youād never makeā¦because of time constraints or like, it just sounds super gross.
But this one had a whole section thatās just āThings on Toastā. Another that was all about putting crap in your oatmeal to make it better. Those are fairly pedestrian and donāt take forever.
I havenāt looked through the whole thing yet but so far itās actually pretty practical. Also if youāre broke like me and donāt know how to make Dal, you should get on that.Ā
I also liked that thereās this at the beginning:
This book isnāt challenging you to live on so little; itās a resource in case thatās your reality. In May 2014, there were 46 million Americans on food stamps. Untold millions moreāin particular, retirees and studentsālive under similar constraints.
Been there. Done that. Advice on this art is always welcome.
The link above seems to be broken; hereās one that still works.
The Good And Cheap cookbook is 100% free as a PDF download from the authorās website and is available in English and Spanish. It is practical, tasty, easy, and kind. Physical copies are one of my top āso you have your own place nowā gifts. Highly recommend.
(note that the PDF is oriented the same as the physical book - two square pages - so itās more landscape format and might be difficult to read on a phone)
Another suggestion to look at is Julia Pacheco on YouTube!
I found her channel recently and she has various videos on how to make meals that taste good for only $5 or $10 ect.. And I donāt mean she buys everything and after mathing itās $5 per portion but a total of $30 spent. I mean she goes into a store and buys everything for the meal and itās $5 for the meal.
Iāve tried a few of her recipes and they were both delicious and easy to make! But when she does her cheap meals she is buying the cheapest ingredients she can find so depending on dietary needs you may need to make adjustments. Same goes for adjusting portions if youāre trying to make dinner for a lot of people cause some of the meal ideas yield portions between 1-3 servings.
me, trying hard to not be like my parents: I am going to be patient, kind, and gentle. I will never yell at others or accuse them of something they might not be able to control. I will bring understanding and affection in other peopleās lives and not trauma like it was done to me.
me, consequently: Why.. is nobody taking my boundaries seriously? Is my existence to be taken as a joke? Why is kindness returned with exploitaton? I am still a person. Now I have to deal with confrontation and I was not gonna go there. I have to struggle between being cold and unnaprochable, and soft and giving. I wanted to relax for a bit and not expect pain at every corner. You all suck. Canāt a person be nice in peace.
Something happened yesterday that made me want to make this post. Iām not going to go into specifics, but Iām sure you can guess what happened.
Itās okay if whatever you went through, your trauma has triggers that could just be played off as childish fears. It isnāt a childish fear. When someone goes through trauma thereās going to be triggers, and if itās the same as a common childhood fear that doesnāt make you childish, it makes you traumatized.
you dont need to rationalize your triggers, because they are triggers it doesnt make you childish. You dont have to be ashamed of them, because its perfectly okay.
you are traumatized, and trying your best, and im proud of you.
-host
also please dont share your triggers on the internet, people can be malicious
Offering a big hug to the emotionally neglected people who have no idea how to cope
The ones that can't grasp the concept of coping. The ones that don't even know how to start identifying their emotions. The ones that don't understand coping mechanisms. The ones who only have maladaptive coping mechanisms. The ones who only know how to repress. The ones that feel ashamed for not knowing how to cope. The ones that feel angry for not having anyone teach them. The ones that feel hopeless about healing. The ones that feel like it's impossible for them to cope
I'm sorry you have to build up from scratch something that other people should've taught you. I see how hard you're trying, I see how exhausting and difficult it is. I wish I could give you so many affirmations, but I'm in the same place you are. Ily