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simon // he/they // 25 // canada // sidebar by ivankarerin

[dogpuppy]

[technofinch]

I have GOT to stop spending $30

[orpheuslament]

i need (abruptly stops talking & stares at some random fixed point with a vacant expression)

[loki-zen]

has anyone considered that it was probably her house too. where else was she supposed to put her chintz?

[banchie]

i've been phasing the phrase 'google it' out of my vocabulary and going back to 'look it up'. fuck you youve lost your generic trademark privileges

[oneheadtoanother]

[anarqueeen]

yeah the doctor said they found the source of my guilt and quiet agony deep within my core. Yeah turns out there really is something physically and fundamentally wrong with me that I've been carrying my entire life. No they said they're not gonna remove it. Said its an "elective surgery" so insurance won't cover it. Anyway how are you

[trentreznorsbutthole]

emoji kitchen is lowkey beautiful guys…

[dragon-in-a-fez]

am I doing this right

[corantus]

locked the fuck in get my money up

[skoomabong]

[isuggestkillingyourself]

[tactfulsaboteur]

[psybomb]

Every time I see that last pic, I have to note that the funniest line is the one immediately after the highlight

[junk-thunder]

you can hit it raw, i’ve got an IED

[sparrow-va]

you have a wha

[sergal]

everyone shut da fuck up this is the only thing that matters

[sergal]

Oh My God Damn

[cuunos]

being a kid and hearing adults say stuff like "woah 2011 was 4 years ago haha" didn't really convey the fucking horror of a youtube video crossing my recommended labelled "9 years ago" and it's from 2017. that's not true. 9 years ago is 2010 or something. don't lie.

[phantomrose96]

That thing where milkmaids were often immunized against small pox because they'd already contracted the weaker cow pox earlier in their lives. That's Tumblr, to me, against whatever the hell social media landscape is happening in 2026.

[phantomrose96]

"TikTok Instagram Youtube-Shorts Share-Your-Whole-Life Influencer Social-Media Online Online Online" it cannot affect me. I was already a weird online 16-year-old all so many years ago. You cannot grab me raw and unfortified with these poisons. I inoculated myself when glomping was a thing. I am still on Tumblr making text poasts.

[redstonedust]

big fan of when a character is dead and the narrative frames them in a very angelic, soft, gentle manner but then it turns out not only are they still alive (plot twist) but theyre alive in the most gruesome and horrific way. your loving kind mentor who motivates you to fight in their memory came back wrong and theres blood and dirt under their fingernails from clawing they way out of the grave.

[grungespuud]

YO OKAY SO I WAS IN THE DIAMOND DISTRICT IN NYC JUST CASUALLY WINDOW SHOPPING AND SHIT, YOU KNOW, THE USUAL, WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THIS FUCKING THING CATCHES MY EYE. THIS. FUCKING. THING. ITS AS BIG AS MY FUCKING HAND AND ITS MADE OF REAL MUFUCKIN DIAMONDS AND GOLD. THIS HAS GONE TOO FAR PEOPLE. LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE. THIS IS WHAT THE WORLD HAS COME TO. FUCK.

[unicorn-a-licious]

what a shrektacular piece of jewelry 

[ilikedthewayhegaveback]

all that glitters is gold

[thedeafprophet]

....environmental storytelling