[shinybrightthing-deactivated202]

weird me out? no. you've weirded me in. let's merge souls

[rexuality]

hikes are very good yes but a deluxe hike is when you are accompanied by a freak with niche nature knowledge. they’re like omg stop there’s a horned valerian varmint beetle here and then you both get to crouch down and look at a bug like :)

[jennyhoelzer-deactivated2016120]

[wulfhalls]

this is like obscenely romantic.........

[beemovieerotica]

was at a bar and a 50+ year old drunk white woman complimented me and my friend's outfits, told us there was a campsite up in northern maryland where a lot of gay bears go to have sex in the woods. we asked her how she knew about this and she very aggressively said "because i'm a FAG HAG!!! but i'm not allowed to say that anymore I GUESS!!!"

[undeadhousewife]

[eeby-deeby-dark-and-creepy]

Ok now I’m curious… Which do you prefer:

I have lived in and out of the city, I prefer the city

I have only lived in the city, I prefer the city

I have only lived out of the city, I prefer the city

I have lived in and out of the city, I prefer out of the city

I have only lived in the city, I prefer out of the city

I have only lived out of the city, I prefer out of the city

Bald/vanilla extract/I reject dichotomies under all circumstances/I can’t read

Remaining time: 1 day 14 hours

[vintricles]

free my girl she did all that and that’s what makes her such a compellingly complex character. that’s her essence

[trumpetsbyjasonderulo]

just cat-sat for my friend for five days and well, new kinsey scale just dropped i’m a 1.5

[anxeious]

bathe in your own sunlight !!!!!!

[homunculus-argument]

Betrayed and backstabbed by your scheming evil advisor? Psch. Skill issue. Absolute amateur problem. Just hire two of them and reward them for snitching on each other. Just make sure that neither of them is gay or they'll just end up hate-fucking each other and fucking you over all the same.

[miss-hexatrix]

"hire two evil advisors but make sure neither of them is gay" are you hearing yourself right now. be serious

[haydenthewitch]

my favorite thing about the "guy fieari doesn't swallow" controversy is that in every video i've seen on it there's someone in the comments going "actualy we were featured in diners drive in and dive episode 342 and he came to our restaurant and he definitely ate our food on and off camera like he cleared the plate and he's a really chill dude actualy" and it's like. does guy fieari know that he has a loyal army across America defending him AS WE SPEAK against the stupidest conspiracy theory i've ever heard of

[foodnetwork-fandom]

guy fieri doesn’t what now?

[acerbicapplecoffee]

[bungerc0re]

the demon princess (malice in her heart, no altruism) would like to curl up on your lap for a few hours

[kingofthehilltoday]

King of the Hill in Winx style 🧚‍♀️

[kingofthehilltoday]

why did this get unearthed i dont even remember making this what the hell is this i hate this why did i make this who brought this back from whatever depths of hell it was in

[ooppo]

"He has a 12 inch cock" well my pussy ain't a fucking magicians hat bitch where is all that supposed to go

[ooppo]

[shocotate]

I broke a ramune bottle to get the marble out for my dragon.

[wickedwonderlandd]

The dragons face never changes, but I still feel like he looks happier in the 2nd pic 🥺

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

The orb delights him

[dragongirlsweetie]

tech companies are always like We have just developed a revolutionary new feature that will automatically leak your private information to the entire internet without you needing to lift a finger