This sounds like a shitpost but people should be allowed to be horny. As in, sexuality is just part of life for most people and there’s no reason for consensual sexual behavior to be punished. A celebrity getting “caught” at a sex club shouldn’t be a scandal. No one should be fired for having a fetlife profile outside of work. Nudes getting leaked shouldn’t be career-ending. Denying and hiding (consensual) sexual interests doesn’t make anyone more professional, it just makes everyone more repressed. And sterilizing ourselves to be better work drones isn’t productive, it’s just creepy. I’d rather my surgeon get absolutely railed on camera and come to work in a good mood, frankly.
also this goes without saying but is also true of ppl who do sex work for used to do sex work. an accountant’s boss finding out that they used to do sex work shouldn’t be a career ender. a restaurant worker shouldn’t be fired bc they have an OnlyFans.
I HIGHLY recommend giving compliments to random strangers.
Not, like, fake compliments or randomly giving scrounged up compliments to everyone you pass in the street, but -- say you see someone with an article of clothing you really really like. Cool accessories or a great haircut or something. Tell them.
I told an old woman yesterday that I liked her blouse. It was this super pretty white-at-the-top-floral-at-the-bottom shirt which was really lovely. So i backtracked where I'd walked past her and I said "excuse me - i love your shirt." And this harried, stressed-looking 80-something year old brightened up immediately, and beamed, and then when she and I headed off in separate directions, she had a pep in her step.
This other time I told a woman that I liked her boots. She gave me a company name thats since become my favourite brand of shoes. I told someone else that her scarf was cute and she was like "do you like it? Here, you can have it," and she dropped her scarf in my hands and then got on her train and left. I once saw a woman who had clearly put effort into her outfit that day but was now looking harried and frazzled as she wrangled four children across the road, and I told her that her outfit was gorgeous and she lit up like a christmas tree. I told a gay man that I loved his whole look once and he turned into a smiling, blushing mess as his super delighted and proud boyfriend was like "yea, he DOES look gorgeous doesnt he?"
If you see someone with something compliment-worthy going on, don't hold back. What's the point? Ive never once had a bad response to giving a compliment to a stranger. Everyone to a tee has been absolutely thrilled to receive a surprise compliment about their outfit or their make up or their shoes or their vibe or etc. Give out compliments to random strangers. Its free, and it'll make their whole day.
Been feeding baby goats that a mama rejected, and having Jonathan and Martha Kent thoughts.
Jon and Martha find the Kryptonian ship in their corn field, but when they open it the baby is not well. He’s traveled light years, and even at the fastest speeds, it was days or even weeks. What fluid was sustaining him has been gone for some time.
They work a farm. They know what a sick baby looks like.
They take the baby inside anyway. It’s far too late for anything to be open, so they break out the milk replacer for the livestock. The bottle they find has had a goat kid sucking on it, but they wash it good, because what other choice do they have?
The baby doesn’t take to the bottle well. He barely eats.
They both know a lack of appetite is a death knell.
“I can’t watch a baby die,” Martha says. She’s done it before. She and Jon struggled to have kids. The closest they got — well. It’s a hard memory for them both.
“I know, love.” Jon’s a good old country boy. He grew up being told it’s a man’s job to take the burden. He’ll take it now. “Go to bed. I’ll stay with him.”
Sure, they both know Martha won’t sleep, but at least she won’t have to see.
Jon takes the wee babe out onto the porch. He tries to poke more milk down him. Rubs his chest, bounces him, pushes the bottle past his lips, every damn thing he can do. The hours are long and hard, but he would never forgive himself if he didn’t try.
The baby continues to fade.
The eastern sky starts to lighten.
“I’m sorry, little fellow,” Jonathan whispers. It’s not long now. He can feel it in his bones. He’s held plenty of animals as they died. He’s waiting for that long last exhale. “Sorry you came all this way and this is your welcome. Can’t even enjoy the sunrise.”
He told himself he wouldn’t cry until the boy was gone. Wasn’t fair, that his last moments would be a man crying instead of comforting him, but Jon does his best to do both at the same time. He cradles the poor little thing even as his shoulders shake.
The sun breaks over the horizon, and light floods the porch. Jon closes his eyes against it and his tears.
It’s a hiccup that is the first sign something changed. Then the wiggling.
Jon nearly drops the baby in shock.
When he looks down, the little boy sure hasn’t died. He’s got this rosy little glow to his cheeks and his eyes are bright. He’s throwing those little hands around like he’s trying to figure out how they work, but he seems to be trying to reach for the sun.
Jon just stares at him until the baby gets frustrated enough with his clumsy limbs that he opens his mouth to tell the world about it.
The baby’s cry is so powerful Jon falls right out of his rocker. It’s a miracle he doesn’t launch the poor thing.
Only thing he can think to do with a screaming baby that’s about to take his eardrums out is shove that bottle right in that open mouth.
The little boy shuts right up and clings to the bottle for dear life as he drinks with a fury.
When Martha comes stumbling out wild-eyed in her jammies, Jon’s sitting on the porch with a grin as bright as the dawn despite the fact his ears are still ringing.
SO I was thinking about how strongly Tara dislikes Gale's in-game hair and beard and it made me wonder if it was originally a result of him locking himself away from everyone but then sort of became intentional later. Also brace yourselves for some character analysis which seems to be unpopular in fan works but is interesting to me:
Gale knows he's handsome.
There always seemed to be a bit of a mismatch between how people depict Gale's confidence in fanworks and how he presents himself in-game to me?
One of his very first interactions at camp he does, admittedly cheekily, play off his Mirror Image as fastidious grooming habits, and dismisses the spell with a sly little "Handsome devil, isn't he?" It's playful and could be read as a bluff, but it does exist and doesn't feel particularly misplaced. This is a man that fucked God. I think that is great assurance that you must on some level be looking pretty good on the regular.
He also thinks he's charming, which he is! He has a line somewhere about having a dazzling smile. He calls Karlach "rough around the edges" but that he supposed he could be "smooth enough for the both of them." He is entirely confident that he can befriend Minthara and is the only one to even think to attempt it.
He is not a shy lover, either, once you are in private. Some of his lines are straight up scandalous. He may be a bit shy and bluster when you're the one to bring it up, but later on he is shameless. The "For now, I'll keep my mouth shut. Unless you have use for it, of course" line made my jaw drop. ALSO when you ask Gale if you were his first aside from Mystra, he says no, you are not. But you are the first AFTER Mystra. In fact, Loroakkan insults Gale by implying it was NOT by magical merit that he gained her favor, and all that merit did was insure he lost it.
Gale's insecurity is about his sense of self worth, and how the metric he judges his own worthiness is by what he can do, not who he is.
I think the reason it bothers me to see this TYPE of insecurity attributed to Gale is that he is our token "bookish nerd" character, and it feels too easy to just assign the one "nerd" character the traits "inexperienced virgin who wishes he looked more like the leading man but actually the lead romance thinks he is sweet despite all his shortcomings." Especially when there's almost nothing in game to draw this conclusion from. And I dunno, maybe some people think that formula is still satisfying as a story but I think its boring. This dude is an absolute dweeb who is also handsome as all hell which is one of the many reasons you are able to pay attention to his forty-five minute long speech about the history of gnolls. He does that and then shoots Astarion down in the same breath. Let autistic people be hot. That's allowed.
I said to someone that Gale is clearly proud of his skills™️ as a lover. There is a line from EA where he confidently invites you to bed…to “dispel the notion that you’ve had better.”
Again, I think it’s part of his rewrite to make him less objectionable to..well, to dudes.
Gale is handsome and confident in his area(s) of expertise. That’s hot AF.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying Gale isn't insecure. I think that is definitely a facet of his personality, but it's a much smaller piece of the whole wizard than most people ascribe.
Gale has Fucked Up™️
His hubris has led him down some dark roads, not the least of which is becoming the realm's sexiest nuke.
He carries some heavy shame for that. The orb in his chest is a constant reminder that he wasn't good enough, didn't work hard enough, couldn't accomplish what he set out to do—which was a Classic Gale Dekarios Romantic Grand Gesture™️
So in one fell swoop, he lost his archmage title, his Chosen title, his lover, and his goddess.
And Gale Dekarios—who devoted his time, his energy, his life, his whole entire heart and soul to obtaining and maintaining those things—would feel an IMMENSE amount of shame and insecurity about losing them.
So yeah, Gale is insecure about some things.
But he knows he's beautiful. And he knows he's talented. And he knows he can make you come five times before dawn.
To add on, I think gale keeps up the 8 pack during his isolation and on the road because of his bedroom skills. Not that he thinks he's only good for sex or that he's having any alone in his tower to begin with, but he knows that sex will be a part of whatever next relationship he has. He wants to be good at it. He want to be the best partner his lover has had because he's put in the effort to be good at it. He is such a romantic and loves the idea of being in love. But he has irrefutable evidence that he is a great shag. Mystra didnt cast him aside for lackluster bedroom performance. He knows that he's hot. He knows that he can fuck.
But he becomes useful to Tav/Durge/Origin Character through his wizarding and BAM he's back at "are you sure you think im cool or are you just here so i keep casting fireball?". He wants to astral project the sex so he can keep wizarding for you. THERES HIS INSECURITIES. Match that with newfound confidence and thats how he decides to do godhood. But you can do your own grand romantic gestures at him and he can see that mortal love is where its at! Thats how you get hot professorial dadbod gale.
after 3 weeks, i finally finish my beauyasha date art! amidst all the other crazy shit that’s happened since then, i still got this episode on my mind.
I need people to understand that the “No” should be much, much higher. 50% of children used to die before the age of 15, and we just went thru an airborne global pandemic. Everybody say “thank you” to vaccines and antibiotics, without which probably 75% of us would be dead.
Thesis statement: The popularity of "found family" is a great thing, especially as it celebrates the importance of non-biological, non-romantic relationships. However, an overemphasis on this relationship model can lead us to undervaluing philia in favor of storge, in much the same way that an overemphasis on shipping can lead to undervaluing philia in favor of eros. It can also lead to an erasure of the differences between philia and storge, treating these two types of love as interchangeable instead of celebrating the distinctive aspects of each.
...Yeah, this could definitely be an Entire Literal Essay, actually. This is...not the short version, but it is the shortest I can manage.
So my main thought is that Friendship is the hardest form of love for our culture to see as distinct and important in its own right, and “found family” often (though not always) ends up as a sort of...middle ground between that point and the “Only Romance Is Important” idea. In a ship-dominated culture, Friendship is often reduced to Level 1 Romance, and—at least in some ways—a found-family-dominated fandom culture can end up reducing Friendship to Level 1 Family.
In practice, I think that....even when we know that we don’t see or want to see an important relationship as Romantic, a lot of us still struggle with the idea of Friendship by itself being equally valuable or important. So we equate “familial” with “important” (because family is undeniably as important as romance, right? Or at least it’s a lot easier to make that case—and also, there is the not-at-all-insignificant benefit that it marks your view of a relationship as CLEARLY platonic!), and then we try to fit every relationship we love into a clearly-labeled Family-Shaped Box, in order to affirm its importance and give it legitimacy that “just friendship” might not.
...which is, ironically, what shippers are sometimes doing when they seem to be putting every relationship they love into a Romance-Shaped Box for the same reason. That’s the highest-status box there is! Don’t you think this relationship deserves the highest Relationship Rank??
But Friendship—philia, using the Greek word (or at least using it as C. S. Lewis uses it—isn’t a weaker form or “first stage” of other loves. It’s its own form of love. Not lesser, but different. And if we keep following our instinct to “legitimize” it by conflating it with family/storge, we end up doing both kinds of love a disservice.
(And I am definitely including myself in the group of people with this instinct! There’s a fandom I’ve gotten into recently that—as not infrequently happens—has a central relationship you could easily consider “father-son,” “best friends,” or a mixture of the two, and there’s variance within the fandom. I personally view this relationship pretty much purely as “best friends” in my own interpretation, but...a few years ago, I would have been much closer to the “father-son” camp. And even though I’ve consciously changed my approach to character relationships over those last few years—mainly due to a variety of other fandom exposures over the past few years, and the pro-friendship opinions I‘ve formulated while thinking about them—I still have some of those pro-familial instincts I entered fandom with! They’re very much what I came here with, and even though I now like other approaches better, they’re still in my brain.)
The disservice to philia comes in the fact that we are still not celebrating it as a non-romantic, non-familial form of love in its own right—which stinks, because it’s great!! and important to humans!! and we should all appreciate how wonderful Friendship is without feeling like we have to turn it onto another kind of relationship once it passes some Importance Threshold. It’s also a less-important disservice to specific fictional relationships that we try to fit into a Family Box and maybe end up misrepresenting or oversimplifying in the process.
The disservice to storge comes in the fact that, with the label of “Family” so highly valued in itself, it tends to get overused and slapped on everything until it’s started to lose all distinctively familial meaning. It becomes harder for us to explore the depths and beauties of distinctively familial love when we’ve lost the verbal distinction between “relationships founded upon specifically familial roles, a strong shared background, and/or an unchosen yet unbreakable connection” (which is how I would identify storge relationships just off the top of my head) and the “found family” definition of “any group of people who love each other not-exclusively-romantically and aren’t related.”
Personally, I kinda miss alternative labels like TVTropes’ “True Companions” or “Platonic Life Partners.” Characters don’t need to be spouses or siblings to be important to each other. They can be solely and purely—though not “just!”—friends.
ok i am curious. how long is the longest song in your library (not counting tracks that are like several songs in one file like a full album mix or symphony recording or whatever) (also if it is longer than 20 minutes say the name in the tags i am curious)
ok i would like to clarify it has to be music and it can't just be a short song that's been looped a bunch. that still counts as several songs in one file, it's just several of the same song in one file. no audiobooks no podcasts no plants vs zombies theme 2 hour loop
So not only do the Exandrian gods not need mortal worship in order to survive, but in order for gods to grant mortals power and protection through the barrier they erected to protect mortals from themselves, there must, mechanically, be mutual love.
Fucking take that, Ludinus dickbag Da'leth, and go fuck yourself.
Text of tweet under the cut because it is loooong.
But... Stochastic Parrots.
Timnit Gebru was fired from Google in December 2020 for refusing to retract a research paper, and every single warning that paper made about large language models has now happened at a scale the industry spent 4 years trying to make people forget about.
Her name is Timnit Gebru.
She co-led the Ethical AI team at Google. She co-wrote a paper called "On the Dangers of Stochastic Parrots" with Emily Bender at the University of Washington and two other researchers. The paper was 14 pages long. It was submitted to a top AI ethics conference. And it was the reason Google decided that one of the most senior Black women in AI research could no longer work there.
The story Google told publicly was that she resigned. The story she told, confirmed by 2,695 of her colleagues in an open letter, was that she was fired by email while on vacation because she refused to either retract the paper or remove her name from it.
The paper had not even been published yet.
Here is what she actually wrote, and why every prediction inside it has now come true.
The first warning was about scale itself. Bender and Gebru argued that training ever-larger models on ever-larger scrapes of the internet would produce systems that appeared fluent but had no actual understanding of language. They called these systems stochastic parrots because they would repeat patterns from training data with statistical confidence and zero comprehension. The paper predicted that this apparent intelligence would fool both users and developers into trusting outputs that were structurally incapable of being reliable.
This was 2020. GPT-3 had just come out. The paper predicted the hallucination problem before anyone had a word for it.
The second warning was about bias amplification. The paper documented in detail that internet-scale training data contains systematic overrepresentation of dominant viewpoints and underrepresentation of marginalized ones. The models would not just absorb this bias. They would amplify it, because the optimization process rewards confident outputs, and confidence in language patterns tracks frequency in the training set.
The prediction was that hiring tools built on these models would discriminate against women. That healthcare triage tools would underperform on Black patients. That loan approval systems would entrench inequality while presenting their decisions as neutral algorithmic judgment.
Every one of those things has now been documented in deployment.
Amazon's hiring algorithm penalized resumes that contained the word "women" in any context. Healthcare risk scoring algorithms used by major US hospitals were found to systematically underestimate the medical needs of Black patients. Apple Card's credit algorithm gave wives credit lines 10x lower than their husbands for the same financial profile.
The third warning was about environmental cost. The paper calculated that training a single large language model produced emissions equivalent to the lifetime output of 5 cars. The prediction was that the race to scale would create an environmental footprint that would eventually rival entire industries.
In 2024, Google's emissions were up 48% from 2019, and the company explicitly blamed AI infrastructure. Microsoft's were up 29%, same reason. Both companies have now quietly abandoned the climate commitments they were publicly celebrating the year Gebru was fired.
The fourth warning was about documentation. The paper argued that the training datasets being assembled were too large for anyone to actually audit. Nobody at Google, OpenAI, Meta, or any other lab could tell you with confidence what was in the data their models were trained on. This was not a temporary problem to be solved later. It was a permanent feature of the approach.
In 2023, researchers discovered that the LAION-5B dataset, used to train Stable Diffusion and other major image models, contained thousands of images of child sexual abuse material. The companies that had trained on the dataset had no way of knowing. The paper predicted that category of failure 3 years before it was found.
The fifth warning was the one Google cared about most.
Bender and Gebru argued that the deployment of these systems would centralize linguistic and cultural power in the hands of the small number of companies that could afford to train them. The internet would become a place where the dominant voice was a statistical average of dominant voices, presented as a neutral assistant. Languages underrepresented in the training data would degrade over time as more web content was generated by these systems and fed back into the next training run.
This is now happening in real time. A 2024 study found that 57% of new web content in English is AI-generated or AI-assisted. Researchers studying low-resource languages have documented active degradation in translation quality, because the synthetic content fed back into training is itself worse in those languages.
The paper Google fired her for predicted the model collapse problem before model collapse had a name.
The mechanism behind why this all happened is the part of her work that nobody quotes.
Gebru's argument was not that AI is dangerous in some abstract sci-fi sense. Her argument was that AI is dangerous in a very specific structural sense. The technology was being built by a small group of researchers who shared similar backgrounds, worked at similar companies, and were rewarded for shipping products faster than competitors. The incentive structure made it impossible for safety, ethics, and bias concerns to slow anything down. Anyone inside the system who raised those concerns was either ignored, sidelined, or removed.
She was making that argument from inside Google.
Then Google proved her right by removing her.
The team Google had built to make sure their AI was safe was dismantled in 90 days because they did the job they had been hired to do. Margaret Mitchell, the other co-lead of the Ethical AI team, was fired two months after Gebru for searching through her own emails for evidence of how Gebru had been treated.
Gebru did not stop. She founded DAIR, the Distributed AI Research Institute, in 2021. The mission is to do AI research outside the control of the companies that have a financial interest in not hearing the answers.
Every prediction in the Stochastic Parrots paper has now been validated by deployment. Hallucinations are an industry-wide problem the largest labs cannot solve. Bias amplification has been documented in hiring, healthcare, lending, and criminal justice. Environmental costs are larger than entire small countries. Training data audits remain impossible. Model collapse is an active research crisis at every major lab.
The question worth sitting with is the one almost no one in the industry will say out loud.
Every researcher with the technical credibility to call out these problems watched what happened to her in December 2020 and made a calculation about their own career. The number of people willing to speak publicly about safety and ethics issues inside the major AI labs collapsed after that firing and has not recovered.
The researcher Google fired for warning about exactly what is now happening was right.
The company that fired her is now the second-largest deployer of the technology she warned about.
And the people inside that company who agree with her are not allowed to say so.
