Just Poke It With A Stick

queer* - he/they - adult - oliver . olilurk on artfight . forever and always a dishonored blog but it doesn't show curse of strahd dm, occasional artist, proofless writer. . *figure it out from context clues or don't. . no AI content on this blog intentionally. if i fail to uphold this lmk, it will have been accidental. . 🇭🇺

[baellielurk]

come get my ass

[orcboxer]

After a 5 year hiatus, national embarrassment Conor McGregor debuts in his own mma tournament called World's Baddest Man and his very first move is to blow out his knee and collapse to the ground

[orcboxer]

[sadclowncentral]

seething about the fact that i will never experience photosynthesis in my own useless cells. i bet it feels so good when the light of the sun both warms you and fuels you at the same time. a bone-deep satisfaction mixed with a heated sugar-rush and endless brightness. not that i would fucking know

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

:D

[cryptile]

Something my dear friend said to me that i think fits

[hylianane]

functionally suicidal character saying “I would die for you” to their significant other and its like. I get the sentiment, honey, but if a hot dog vendor told me he’d sell hot dogs for me, I wouldn’t feel very moved now would I

[maseratus]

Now a functionally suicidal character saying “I will live for you”. Now that’s a dynamic I can sink my teeth into.

[mousidy]

now how about a functionally suicidal character saying "I will sell hot dogs for you"

[mousidy]

[bisthefairy]

Hotdog vender lays down their life to protect their suicidal partner, who then takes over the hotdog stand to carry on their memory...

[maightymai]

[cipheramnesia]

It's like talking to a 2010 Old Spice commercial with you people

[ostolero]

young old person tip for you all. go get some photos printed (pauses so someone can say bogos binted) and fill out a physical album

[sayaratyriea]

and annotate them with who is in the photos and when and where the photos were taken!!! your extended family 50 years from now will be grateful, and so will you if you end up forgetting any details

[mortimermcmirestinks]

(sprints into room late, looking harried and frantic as fuck) bogos binted. did I miss it

[punkrorschach]

the legally blonde mentality isnt just for law students. u can bring that attitude with you into every field of work. be the whimsical force of positive change. wear that neon outfit. snaps for us all.

[punkrorschach]

this post was inspired by my boss telling me she couldnt "take me seriously" in a pair of dinosaur print overalls. sorry i have two degrees and a dope wardrobe. you dont need to take me seriously but You Will Take Me.

[black-quadrant]

OP's an inspiration. bring on the whimsy movement!

[nora-barnacle]

[starlitsequins]

i dont mean to victim blame but why do these vampires keep talking to daniel molloy when they know he's daniel molloy

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

some people don’t deserve fanfics, much less for free.

also even if authors didn’t tag any specific warnings but they used the “creator chose not to use archive warnings” tag, then that is your warning.

“omg you should’ve —” no one forced your entitled ass to read anything. fanfic writers write for themselves and their own enjoyment. if you don’t like what you’re reading, quietly leave. ao3 is not an airport. no one cares about your departure so no need to announce it.

[desperatelyseekingcannibals]

Flashbacks to that time someone left a shitty comment because I had "triggered" them by not tagging time travel.

Friends, I had tagged time travel.

[sweaterkittensahoy]

I had someone get mad at me for having characters talk shit about Hocus Pocus.

Ahem:

[masao-micchi]

side effect of watching james cameron’s avatar and sharing one very smart brain cell.

no touching happened that day bahaHAHA

My other PHM art here

[drops-of-universe]

please dont vape your blueberry ice flavor around my kid. we are raising him on marlboro reds exclusively.

[mens-rights-activia]

[mens-rights-activia]

I would like to note that I left flowers for her afterwards, just as a “sorry for using your grave for content”

[username1134]

Went off the template a bit but, an @justcakethanks eridian welcoming committee comic!!

[chicknwire]

I love tumblr more than IG bc IG feels like I’m posting looking for a job but on here it’s like I already lost the job and my wife and the house and I’m just sitting on the curb talking to myself

[screampotato]

Suddenly struck with a need to explain to you how boat pronouns work (I work in the marine industry).

When you're talking about the design of the boat, you say "it".

When the boat is still being built, your say "it".

When the boat is nearing completion, you can say "it" or "she".

When the boat is floating in the water you probably say "she", unless there is still a lot of work to be done (e.g. no engine yet) then you say "it".

When the boat is officially launched and operating, you say "she". If you continue to say "it" at this point you are not incorrect but suspiciously untraditional. You are not playing the game.

If you are referring to a boat you don't really know anything about you may say "it" ("there's a big boat, it's coming this way"). But if you know its name, it's probably "she" ("there's the Waverley, she's on her way to Greenock").

If you are talking about boats in general, you say "it" ("when a boat is hit by a wave it heels over")

If you speak about a boat in complimentary terms, it's "she" ("she's a grand boat"). If you are being disparaging it may be it, but not necessarily ("it's as ugly as sin", "she's a grotty old tub").

If she has a boy's name, she's still she. "Boy James", "King Edward", "Sir David Attenborough"? The pronoun is she.

If it's a dumb barge (no engine), you say it. But if it's a rowing boat (no engine), you say she.

I hope this has cleared things up so that you may not be in danger of misgendering floating objects.

[glitched-out-mess]

[lesbianmarrow]

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business

[tunnaa-unnaa]

taking notes