my homework isn't done

just trying my best

[randomitemdrop]

Item: baby clothes for grown men polo-collared onesie so the Discerning Gentleman needn’t take time from the grind tucking in his shirt over and over

[whats-a-bear]

[thebeanestbad]

broke: midsommar is a girl power movie

woke: midsommar is a horrifying movie about a manipulative cult

bespoke: midsommar is a litmus test to tell how easily you could be indoctrinated into a cult and if your first thought after watching it is that it was a girl power movie you’re very susceptible to cult tactics and you should be aware of that

[thebeanestbad]

you’re the only person who’s allowed to reply to this post anymore

[funnytwittertweets]

[gallusrostromegalus]

OK but, that's actually how it's done.

I'm vastly oversimplifying this but, The organization that wants to do a pollen count puts out a bunch of sticky microscope slides out in various points across the region they want to do the count in, and after 24 hours, bring the slides in and

Literally Count The Pollen Grains On Each Slide

they break the pollen up by type (Tree, Grass, Weeds and Mold Spores which aren't technically pollen but in terms of allergies they function much the same way) and run the numbers through a few equations to determine the average amount of different types of pollen across the region.

So yes. The Pollen is literally counted,

And that shit is tiny as fuck.

[demilypyro]

Honkball

[vworpstageleft]

… I thought this was a joke. I thought you were doing a bit.

[doubleca5t]

[especdreamy]

[borkthemork]

[cephalopyrus-deactivated2023100]

[wormautopsy]

[especdreamy]

[link]

[wormautopsy]

[shittymoviedetails]

Lord of the Rings Trilogy but it's EVERY scene where two female characters interact

[breya-etherium-shaper]

*multiplies you by 1*

Ach im the exact same but a process has occurred

[the-fbi-agent-in-your-phone]

The eradication of adobe flash dress-up games directly led to the creation of NFT's.

[markwateneymemorialcrater]

Sure. I’ll incorporate that into my world view

[cikero]

I love when my little cat does a frustrated little harumph when he doesn’t get what he wants immediately like okay. You are tiny and small

[transmascfrankiero]

you are NEVER too old to nestle under a blankie and get so cozy and warm. remember this

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[beatrice-babe]

this is megamind-coding

[huffylemon]

[wishfulsketching]

I've stared at this for too long so before I start hating it, I'll post it! Also a quick part 2:

[dispatchesfromtheclasswar]

[biglawbear]

Good for this person. This is exactly what you do. Screw the job.

I had a job that made me work an all nighter, 30 hours straight, over Thanksgiving. I resigned that Monday and it was one of the most satisfying decisions I’ve ever made.

[running-in-the-dark]

Part 3:

[maleficentmrsofallevil-deactiva]

Explanation: OP created an application programming interface (API), or a sort of customized computer program, that allowed his former employer to provide compliance reports for lots of companies. Big companies who will pay big fines if they don’t remain in compliance. But - you have to know what numbers to type into the magic box (the API), and where to put them. And apparently, no one learned how to do this but OP.

Imagine you’re at a huge university/college where everyone relies on a special email client created by ONE GUY. That one guy is the ONLY one who knows how it works, and what to do if something goes wrong. Piss off that ONE GUY, and NO ONE at the school can send a single email. Hell - imagine if every person in your CITY lost access to email, and you should start to have a good idea of how crucial this guy was. Only instead of everyone freaking out because no one can communicate electronically, a government agency comes in and fines everyone thousands of dollars for every hour that each person can’t “send an email” (in my example).

As to why the post was deleted, the answer is simple. Either a) the former employer intends to sue on the basis of some non-compete agreement they think they have, or b) someone who works at the regulator’s office understood the context well enough to figure out who OP is. Maybe a little of both. (I suspect that if I did a little Googling, I could probably figure it out, too, but I won’t. I respect OP’s privacy.)

Whoever OP’s former employer was, they are about to go up in flames. And they’re probably going to take a ton of their clients down with them.

Great read.

[gayvampyr]

doctor: asks me for a time frame of symptoms

me, adhd:

[hannahhillam]

[starsberrisnunicorns]

Did the cat just give–

[teenagerposts]

this is the wholesome pure content we need more of

[thischick25]

[whatthemythicalwhat]

I love Josh’s anti-classism so much. I grew up in a single parent household that didn’t have time/the ability to cook. I taught myself as an adult and ended up loving it. I cook with this stuff a lot. Shit, the RealLemon juice ends up in a lot of my cocktails. Sure, I like fancy ingredients when I can afford them and I have things I get picky about using - but I have bad hands, mincing garlic is painful as fuck. There’s a lot to be said for knowing how to work with what you have. Don’t shame people for trying, don’t shame people for feeding their families things that they enjoy.

[rosie-with-knives]

Guys. One of my best friends is a professional chef. Went to culinary school and all. He does NOT chop his own garlic. He hates it. He will peel them only if he has a specific use for a whole clove. He used the jarred stuff. Use the damn jar of garlic. Use the cheap salt. Use the lemon and Parmesan. Cooking at all in this day and age is an accomplishment, you’re doing great. And if you can’t, for whatever reason, hang in there. Cooking is great, but eating is what’s most important.

[karmiky]

Pro chef here and I have all of these in my fridge. And recommending stock concentrates. A little bit in rice or a sauce or soup makes it so much better. They take up less space and can be cheaper than the quarts. And it’s basically the exact same thing restaurants use. Very few places make their own stock.