We need to make this place as inhospitable for predatory men as possible
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@capybarad
We need to make this place as inhospitable for predatory men as possible
Increasingly grumpy at the lazy shorthand portrayal of misogynistic men as members of the He-Man Woman-Hater's Club.
Yeah, people like that suck, but they don't have nearly as big of an impact on your life as your boss, who is lovely and charming and genuinely likes you but gives all the good projects to male staff for reasons he probably isn't even aware of.
Or your advisor who is awesome and helpful and also genuinely likes you, but says things like "Don't worry your pretty little head about it," and writes more effusive recommendation letters for your male colleagues.
Or your dad, who loves you and your mother very much, but still thinks you'd be happier at home with the kids instead of gallivanting around with a fancy-pants job all day.
People are messy. Good people swallow some shitty social norms. Misogyny isn't limited to incels.
I am cranky, I'll see myself out.
per the guardian.
āmen canāt be oppressedā -> men of colour
āwhite men canāt be oppressedā -> gay men
āheterosexual men canāt be oppressedā -> trans men
ācis-het men canāt be oppressedā -> intersex men
āperisex men canāt be oppressedā -> disabled men
āable-bodied men canāt be oppressedā -> neurodivergent men
ācis-het perisex white able-bodied neurotypical men canāt be oppressedā -> buddy let me tell you about wealth and class and homelessness and immigrants and minority languages and cultures and being a child and being an elderly person and and and
we can keep doing this all day but the reality of the world is that very few people donāt face any kind of oppression at all and everyone exists in a complicated, intersecting web where they have privileges over some people in some contexts and some others are have privilege over them in other contexts. no one individual is incapable of enacting oppression and if you think that about yourself you need to go away and interrogate that belief.
"men can't be oppressed" said no one ever, yet what women say is that men aren't oppressed for being men, "men" as a class and a group aren't an oppressed class and a group, they are the privileged and oppressor group
But I mean it's easier to win an argument when ur talking to yourself, isn't it
the way so many shows, especially historical shows, will be like, "and let's throw in some PROSTITUTES to liven things up a bit, what a nice titillating garnish to add to our period piece" make me want to kill all male screenwriters forever and ever
um what da fack: https://myuhblog.tumblr.com/post/815013870282375168
The trans community: "Transition is not glamorized self harm! how dare you!!"
Also the trans community vvvv
š¬š¬š¬
Being a radfem is constantly dealing with people like this appearing in your mentions:
Y'all do know trafficking isn't restricted to sex right
Like y'all know that right
I'm starting to think some people don't know that
Like labor trafficking is so prevalent in for instance cleaning and/or hospitality and/or field work and I don't see anybody advocating for banning those jobs, or at least not on any kind of legislative level
People never ever bring this up because they genuinely care about hospitality or construction trafficking.
People bring it up exclusively to silence feminists talking about sex trafficking.
Yes, I oppose all forms of slavery. Yes, I think they should all have laws made against them.
Sex trafficking is still really really bad and itās the only one leftists are currently trying to normalize.
Come back and talk to me about how those dummy SWERFs donāt care about other kinds of slavery when you have middle class white people saying āomg some people find it EMPOWERING to pick oranges for 16 hours in the sun for $14 dollars a day! They have this thing called autonomy and making it illegal to exploit people for slave labor only makes it more dangerous. Just admit youāre catholic!ā #slavelaborislabor š š»
also imagine comparing cleaning to sex slavery. like it's awful that human trafficking exists but a lot of these jobs are necessary as a concept. is having a woman whose choices are to have sex with a random person in a way they - not her - want, or not get any money - necessary to maintain healthy society?
god fucking dammit i really really wanted to like this blog but then the transmisogyny...for fucks sake its heart breaking you are *so* close to seeing shit properly but then you leave out our trans sisters. Insane. The trans women in my life have grappled with misogyny and the violence of men and discrimination just as much as I have and they are some of the most vulnerable of us, and they fight with us all the time. And yet. Instead of standing together against the real problem (patriarchy, its always patriarchy. Misogyny.) Y'all pull this shit. I promise you being a terf doesn't make your life better. I promise you, you're harming the cause of women and gender equality when you leave trans women out. It creates a strict definition of womanhood that chokes us all. Worse, you're harming yourself.
I really hope that genuinely caring women like you free yourselves from the aesthetics of virtue. What I mean by that, is too many women conflate niceness for actual kindness or goodness. The performance is more important than the ethic and it's practice. I know you think I hate trans people, but I don't. I care more about diagnosing what's actually happening as opposed to what appears to be happening. I know people like you think I'm evil because I say shit like "transphobia/cis privilege doesn't exist" and reblog shit like "i love being a TERF," but it's interesting how angry you are about these posts I've either made or reblogged when the surrounding context of such statements is entirely fair.
For one, I don't call myself a TERF. I am called a TERF by predominantly US/UK white people who don't like that I don't view gender as materially real and are divorced from the reality of my plight as a black woman living in Africa. I do celebrate being called a TERF, though, because it has become, on some level, a euphemism for "feminazi" which is something male supremacists use to shut down feminists. I am proud to be saying things that threaten the status quo enough to provoke such vitriol from men.
Secondly, I say transphobia/transmisogyny is unreal because they are useless political concepts. They are not only insulting to other marginalized and oppressed groups like women and the LGB, but they are also worthless when it comes to articulating the struggles trans people face and why they do. You are angry at me for the appearance of bigotry (and men view noncompliance from women as bigotry, incidentally), but I have not actually been remotely bigoted by saying what I have said.
Your message is evident of how ineffective and divorced from intellectual rigour such words like "transmisogyny" and "transphobia" are. For example, we are both women that know what it's like to be hated for our femaleness, but still, unless you yourself are black, only one of us would experience misogynoir. My skin and my uterus aren't identities. They are facts about me. "Trans" is an identity. It's a "gender expression." Misogyny is the hatred of female people (otherwise, why does it exist at all? on what grounds?), but the fear of gender nonconformity is a direct offshoot off the hatred and oppression of lesbian, gay and bi people. You aren't oppressed for having "a gender expression" if you can just change it. It's like saying you're oppressed for being goth. Just don't where those clothes, then. Me? I can't just bleach my skin and WHOOOSH! No more racism. Majority of people in the world can't just change their genitals or cellular structure and all the other things that sex affects. Gay men also face things women face, i.e. sexual assault and being berated for being feminine--they're still men and the reason trans women experience hate or violence for their identities is because they are gender non-conforming male people. You don't see women getting beat up for being feminine. Why? Because gender is a tool of oppression, not an axis of oppression. Gender is used to keep male and female people "in line" and trans people step out of line, which is why they're socially punished. Yet, that still doesn't make trans women "our sisters" any more than it makes gay men "our sisters" anymore than it makes white women capable of experiencing misogynoir. Their manhood is essential to their experiences as men as our womanhood is essential to our experiences as women. Trans women can't be hated for being something they're not. If they were women, no one would be giving them the stink-eye for wearing a dress. Who are we helping by ignoring these realities? Certainly not the black homosexual trans women that die at the hands of johns in the prostitution industry. Certainly not majority of the poor, working class trans men who still experience rape and harassment from men of all sorts and can't afford hormone treatment or surgery (because majority aren't wealthy enough for that amount of lifelong treatment). Certainly not the gay feminine boys who think there's something wrong with them for being both male, feminine and attracted to men. Who are told real men aren't attracted to men and don't play with dolls. Certainly not the older women who need HRT because they're in menopause but an entitled straight man who got addicted to porn and is turned on by wearing women's clothes got there first.
Trans women, like everyone--even straight men--can be affected by misogyny because misogyny is a prejudice borne of a system that affects how each and every one of us live. But just like straight men, they cannot themselves experience hatred for a sex they don't have. The same way they can't experience racism for a colour they aren't. Female bodies aren't neglected in medicine because we didn't present "masculine enough." Butch/stud lesbians are still treated badly because they're female. Just-born female infants are still killed because the female sex is looked down on. Their "masculine" identity doesn't help them with shit. So if being masculine can't give female people (like trans men) male privilege, why would being feminine give male people (trans women) female oppression? It doesn't and it can't.
To say that women and men can identify in or out of oppression is to say that wherever oppression against women happens, it happens because we're choosing it. It also suggests that real, actual bigots will be careful to ask your pronouns first before oppressing you. It's backwards. But of course, it does make you seem like a nice and loving person to just validate people who ask for it. Even if what they're asking you to validate isn't real or helpful.
But I'm not interested in appearing nice and that's why I'm not scared of being called a "TERF" or a "transphobe." They're just virtue signals at this point, and I'm more interested in knowing the truth and using the truth to actually help people instead of my reputation. I hope, when you have the time to sit with your emotions and think about why you value what you do, that you'll realize there are more productive ways to help the vulnerable of society than "being nice and affirming."
āgender is a tool of oppression, not an axis of oppressionā
Article Link / Archive Link
just watched an episode on a serial rapist where a 18 year old girl was told by a policeman heād put her in jail himself if she was lying, so she quickly changed her story & was fined $500. Years later a serial rapists computer was found where he documented all of these eapes & a photograph of her in the circumstance of her story was right there. āFalse reportsā well I wonder how many āfalse reportsā are true. & men are more likely to be raped than falsely accused also.
I've been saying. "False reports" are true reports that were recanted due to threats.
Yep!!! & I honestly hadnāt thought of that.
Police officers are also often abusers themselves, so what they consider "assault" against a woman is incredibly skewed.
For more information about this issue, check out Victim/Suspect (trailer) a Netflix documentary that follows the investigation by journalist Rachel de Leon on the disturbing pattern of young women going to the police to report they've been sexually assaulted, only to find themselves charged with the crime of making a false report.
End Violence Against Women International (EVAWI) has an informative publication on this issue called "Raped, Then Jailed: The Risks of Prosecution for Falsely Reporting Sexual Assault", which includes the case example of the 18-year old OP is referencing:
Sexual assault (SA) crimes are difficult to investigate and substantiate, and the police are pressured to "close cases", the easiest method for SA reports is to get the victim to recant her statement, thereby providing evidence for them to charge her with a false report which is a 100% slam dunk way of closing a brand new case.
This has happened to me several times when attempting to report rape/ abuse. I don't have the spoons to read the last reblog fully, but this is real and it inflates "false report" cases. They threatened to put me in jail and told me to "be real careful about what you say next". To the police, you are the villain, not the rapist or abuser. No suprise how common it is that policemen beat their wives.
Tear it all down and burn it.
"uh women do this bad thing too" okay good for herrrr this is double standards wednesday
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butch4butch milestone
Dear men,
In case you haven't heard it today, you're kind, caring, handsome and smart. Don't ever let these misandrists ruin your day.
women are inferior to us in every conceivable way and yet have the audacity to be misandrists. women in general are utterly stupid and devoid of logic,and should never have gotten the right to vote or make decisions about the fate of our country.
you could study feminist theory your whole life, travel the entire world to study the mechanisms of female and male socialization worldwide, devote your life to writing a 900,000 words philosophical essay on it and you still couldn't convey the reality of it any better than this post has <3