orcs would love going to costco
you get it
taylor price

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roma★
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Not today Justin
Mike Driver
The Bowery Presents

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club

Origami Around
Fai_Ryy
Monterey Bay Aquarium
hello vonnie
RMH

titsay
we're not kids anymore.
KIROKAZE

#extradirty

Discoholic 🪩
Cosimo Galluzzi

izzy's playlists!

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@chaoticz8
orcs would love going to costco
you get it
Last year, I befriended a Catholic seminarian. We've gotten to be pretty decent friends. Seeing as he was staying in town for the summer and I wasn't, I entrusted him with caring for my plant.
He did a wonderful job, but as he was returning my plant to my custody, he explained "I watered her every other day, I gave her new dirt, moved her into the sunshine, prayed the rosary-"
"What?"
He looked at me, confused. "Isn't she a plant you pray with?"
"No," I said slowly. "She's a prayer plant. That's the... colloquial name of the plant."
Upon seeing his stricken face, I realized something went wrong. Turns out, this entire time, he's been including my plant in on his prayers and leaving her near icons.
Listen, totally cool. My plant becoming Catholic is a great deal for her not dying over the summer. But now I must navigate this interfaith household. Keep me in your thoughts.
uh oh! the villainous Dr. Frown has stolen all of the smiles from Happy City! we need the aid of Gigglegirl to put a stop to his reign of terror! :(
okay, so, we were expecting Gigglegirl to just, like, cheer up the citizens of Happy City to return our smiles. we did not expect her to do that to Dr. Frown. our deep and sincere condolences to the Frown family
Every once in a while, I wish the friendship meter from the Sims was real so that way when people tell me "I used Chat-GPT" they can visually see just how much respect I just lost for them in that moment.
One time an acquaintance told me she entered Snape's star chart into chatgpt and I could physically feel that meter dropping three separate times over the course of her sentence
wow millennials are glued to their i-phones and laptops so much they cant even be bothered robbing in person anymore!!! maybe these trust fund babies should stop phishing credit cards while sitting on their butts and go out there and put some elbow grease into their thievery!
I know exactly what happened. Because it happened to me.
I trained for years to be a con artist. I told my friends and family that I wanted to be a magician, but that was just a cover for why I was constantly practicing sleight of hand.
In junior high and high school, I would shop lift a bunch of candy on my way to school, sell it to kids at the morning break, and use that money to run a crooked poker game at lunch.
Finally, when I was 19 or 20, I felt I was ready, and I picked my first pocket. I was on the bus, bumped a guy as I passed down the aisle, got his wallet, super clean.
In the wallet was several hundred dollars. A huge first score, I had been hoping for a couple twenties. I sat there looking at the, like, 400 bucks, thinking.
That was my rent at the time. We were both on the bus. It was likely his rent too. Lord knows the only reason to carry that much cash on the bus is you’re on your way to pay a bill. We were both on the bus, you know? That’s not someone I was comfortable stealing from.
I tapped him on the shoulder and told him “hey i think you dropped this” and gave it back to him with all the money still in it. It was the first and last time I ever picked a pocket.
Picking a rich person’s pocket is a loosing game. They probably have credit cards and not cash, those credit cards probably have the best anti-theft measures their bank can provide, and you probably can’t get close enough to those people to pick their pockets unless you’re already rich yourself.
The people who’s pockets you can reliably pick are the people around you. The people who are also on the bus, who are in this same shitty situation with you.
As wealth inequality becomes more drastic picking pockets has very clearly become “stealing from other poor people” and it’s not satisfying. I want to steal from Google and Apple and Fox and Facebook and General Mills and Hershey and Tesla. Not the person next to me.
i have a suggestion
save me mutuals I arbitrarily decided were cool. Save me
they don't know who they are but I do. Save me
sorry to everyone out there who thinks they have the funniest tshirt but i think i can confidently say i just saw the actual funniest tshirt just now. i passed by a beautiful black woman with long multicolor braids blowing majestically in the beach breeze & she was wearing an oversized tshirt that said in gigantic letters "WHITE BOY OF THE YEAR"
Not now, kitten, m- da- m- your parental figure is in the middle of a gender crisis
sometimes merely existing in the world as a trans woman with principles makes me feel like i'm going insane. what do you mean people think prisons are a good thing. what do you mean diverting from monogamy is considered ludicrous. what do you mean people think one's nature is unchangeable. what is considered 'normal' by the overwhelming majority of people is fucking topsy-turvy land to me. i dont understand it at all
we're all really feeling this one, huh?
Do you hope Mr. Stark will adopt you?
seeing as i am an adult with no need nor desire for a parental or paternal figure, no. seeing as i am broke, yes.
Collecting kitty orbs increases your meow score
Does anyone know what to do about the temperature and also the prices
what they DONT tell you about clarinets is that you have to fucking build the damn thing every single time. "what instrument do you play" fucking legos man idk
about build clarinets damn do DONT every fucking fucking have idk instrument is legos man play" single tell that the they thing time. to what "what you you you
I really need to start reading the blog name because I thought I was having some sort of moment right there.
say what u want about the manscaped ads I know they are shit, all of them but the “evil, sinister, malcontent, balls” one puts me into fucking hysterics actually
please this is SO funny
HUH?!