No Day But Today

Sam | 31 | Queer | NZ

[2well2water]

if you were a real leftist you wouldn’t be right handed. everyone start training up

[bandtshirt]

new years resolutions

[dubiousculturalartifact]

The new Odyssey adaptation has inevitably gotten people talking about a Muppet version of it, and they’re frequently suggesting Kermit as Odysseus, Miss Piggy as Penelope.

I’m sorry but that’s thinking way too small, hear me out:

We need to have Miss Piggy as Odysseus, and Kermit as Penelope.

Think about it… who’s the more fickle, prideful, warlike one in that relationship? Who is absolutely ready to go ham, at a moment’s notice?

It ain’t Kermit

[anyroads]

Miss Piggy tied to the mast while Statler and Waldorf heckle her from the sea

[merlinmumbles]

Okay but who's the one human actor playing?

[literary-potato]

I vote Nobody, but I could see arguments for Helen of Troy or Circe as well.

Also important:

How does the Circe turning men into pigs thing get handled given that Miss Piggy is a pig-Muppet and there are multiple other muppets who are already canonically pig-Muppets?

They get turned into real live action pigs, nobody remarks on it

They get turned into real live action pigs & Piggy looks directly at the camera

They get turned into chickens

They get turned into live action humans

Nothing happens at first to the guy Muppet-pig, so Circe has to get creative

Other/I’m bald/vanilla extract

Voting ended onJul 30

Just to clarify my vision on a couple of these:

* by chickens I mean Muppet-chickens à la Camilla (Gonzo naturally would have some reaction to this)

* in the “nothing happens at first to muppet pig”, what I’m visualizing is that Cpt James Pork (or whatever his name is - the pigs in space one) is in the crew, everyone else in the crew gets transformed into either live action pigs or non-sentient Muppet-pigs (walking on 4 legs, etc), and he is completely unchanged… until Circe sighs and snaps her fingers again, and he turns into some other animal (maybe a chicken? or possibly a live action human, in which case it’s obviously either an INSANE celebrity cameo pull with someone who’s normally top billing, or literally William Shatner)

[literary-potato]

Can I just say I really appreciate that our collective commitment to the Muppets is so strong that at 120-something votes, not one person has chosen other/vanilla extract?

[gardengarlic]

Every time this crosses my dash there's a different string of comments and they are all gold so I'm consolidating.

[amuseoffyre]

Circe - only human in the film, played by Anne Hathaway! - turning the pig muppet crew into humans and Miss Piggy gasping "You monster!"

[silverselunite]

That's me in the corner

That's me in the spotlight

Failing my religion

[c4zer]

oh ok

[tomb-mold]

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

[kragehund-est]

it actually is insane to me that it's a cultural norm for men to suck ass at getting their wives/gfs gifts. especially when they whine about how they have no idea what women like.

man, you're not getting a gift for Female Domestic Partner. you're getting a gift for Natalie, a person whom you have been married to for 7 years, whom has lived in the same home with you for a decade, whom speaks to you every day about her thoughts and interests, whom you presumably love, and whom you can directly or indirectly ask what she wants. it's not that you don't know what half the human population wants, that's irrelevant. you don't know what Natalie wants and that is inexcusable.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[shutyourmoustache]

“There’s simply no room for me to park my hellcat” wins best in show for me.

[identifying-deer-in-posts]

I don't get it. What's the problem with letting deer in your yard? What's the stigma

[identifying-deer-in-posts]

Stigma nose in your bird feeder lmao

[baejax-the-great]

Somewhere out there on a planet very far away is a civilization that has included our sun in a beloved constellation of some animal we couldn't dream up if we tried

[asteroidtroglodyte]

I like your brain

[2well2water]

scotty doesn’t knowwww that fiona and meeee do it in my swampppp every sunday

[a-timely-problem]

For those that need a comparison to watch "ride or die"— that show is as if James Bond was actually interesting and had friends.

[dahlia-molinas]

if christopher nolan was really the visionary and ground-breaking director everyone claims he is he would have cast ben affleck as penelope

[kocalls]

[making-friendos]

🩷💙

[initiala]

As much as I think it would be fun to have emotive anthropomorphic ears, I also recognize I can barely control my facial expressions. Like hell can I keep from Angry Ears-ing during meetings

[initiala]

This is who you’re having a meeting with, by the way.