hey. don’t cry. a half cup of heavy cream, a quarter cup of milk, 2 teaspoons of sugar, a little bit of vanilla extract, a pinch of cinnamon, a pinch of nutmeg, heat on low until just warm, dip with ritz crackers, okay?
Happy pride month specifically to folks on the asexual and aromantic spectrum who oftentimes feel isolated and left out of the conversation. You belong here as much as the rest of us and I hope that you are all loved in a way that is comforting to you.
please please please please reblog if you’re a writer and have at some point felt like your writing is getting worse. I need to know if I’m the only one who’s struggling with these thoughts
this is a common phenomenon. the better you get, the more you recognize flaws. the good thing is you can strive to get better. but the bad thing is that you see nothing but flaws. you are actually getting better, but your editing/critical brain is getting tuned up and can see more things to improve. someone post the graph, I can't find it
Thomas Magnum practically dragged himself out of the water, still in a rotten mood; his latest case had basically went up in flames, almost literally. It had ended a few days ago, but he still felt sour about it especially when the husband who hired him to track his ever-cheating wife almost refused to pay when given proof that his wife was still cheating. Thomas couldn’t understand why he’d been hired when the other man was planning on doing nothing with the evidence. He wasn’t planning on confronting the wife and leaving her. The only reason there had been a confrontation at all was because the wife had come in, snatched up one of the photos and asked Thomas for a blown-up copy. When she found out her husband wasn’t planning on paying Thomas, she paid him and gave him a little extra in advance for the blown-up copy. If he hadn’t owed everyone in his life money, he wouldn’t have taken it and would just have written the entire case off as a lesson not to repeat.
The sound of the lads barking across the expansive lawn jolted him from his thoughts and he groaned internally. He didn’t even want to run from the dogs Higgins had set after him. Their growls had changed his mind however. He tore past them, heading for the guesthouse of the palatial estate.
As he approached the guesthouse, he could hear the phone ringing. “For fuck’s sake!” He groaned.
The lads growled again from behind him and he sprinted up the tile staircase. The phone stopped ringing briefly, only to start up half a second later and making him groan out loud once more. He wasn’t looking forward to taking another case and was tempted to tell Rick to shove it. The phone kept ringing incessantly, which meant it wasn’t Rick. Rick would’ve given up and called the main house, forcing Higgins to take a message for Thomas. With a growl, he grabbed the handset.
“What!?” He snarled.
“Well hello to you too, sexy man.” He instantly deflated at the sound of Rosemarie’s voice in his ear. If he was being honest with himself, he missed hearing it. “Are you doing anything right now?”
“Just standing in the living room, ruining the wooden floor by dripping water all over.”
“Mmm,” She was practically purring. “What a delicious image of you.”
“What can I do for you Rose?”
“You can drive over here and fuck me senseless.” She replied. “Get a pen and paper and I’ll give you my address.” He tucked the handset between his shoulder and ear before doing as told. “Don’t bother putting on any clothes,” She said in a warning tone. “I want you just the way you are now.”
“I would Rose,” He replied. “but Higgins will kill me if I ruin the Ferrari’s leather seats.”
“Who cares about the stupid Ferrari?” She snapped. “Just get here!”
She hung up before he could even reply. Shaking his head, he replaced the handset to its cradle. He didn’t want to drive while dripping wet, so he went into the ensuite for a towel before grabbing a pair of shorts to change into. He quickly dried himself off and pulled on the green pair of shorts.
Half an hour later, he was pulling into her Waianae driveway and parking next to a two-tone aqua and white four door sedan: a ’55 Buick Special. The vintage car should have been a clue to what the interior of the house was. Instead, he thought nothing of it and climbed one of the blue painted stair cases up to the house. As if she had been waiting, she flung the door open and yanked him inside unceremoniously. It happened so fast that he nearly tripped over the threshold.
She scowled at his gray tank-top and her hands immediately went to the hem, wasting no time in yanking it up. He pushed her hands away and peeled the offense item off, letting it drop to the floor. Like she had been the first time they met, she became mesmerized by the sight of his hairy chest. A small pale hand came up to his chest and slim fingers entangled themselves in his chest hair. He bent down, cupping her chin gently, and kissed her sharply, making sure his mustache scrapped against her skin. She moaned, opening her mouth and allowing his tongue to slip in and tangle itself with hers. Why did it take so long for her to call me? He thought as her hand tightened its grip on his chest hair. Wait, his thoughts continued, she gave me her number. Why didn’t I call her?
“Which way to your bedroom?” He mumbled, breaking the kiss.
“End of the hallway,” She replied breathlessly. “I have condoms in your size.”
He chuckled. “Oh, do you?”
She nodded. “I bought them the morning after.”
He couldn’t help but wiggle his eyebrows, making her laugh. He turned them around so her back was facing the living room and he forced her backward, through the room and down the hallway, kissing her the entire time. He lost his lien shorts in her doorway and she grinned at him when she realized that he’d forgone underwear. He groaned into her mouth as her hand cupped his penis, giving it a soft squeeze. He scooped her up, wrapping her legs around his waist and carried her over to the bed. He dropped her unceremoniously onto the mattress before crawling on top of her.
She pushed him off and straddled his naked waist and gave him a mischievous smile before grinding her still clothed crotch against his bare one. He reached under the hem of her floral blue 50’s style dress, became surprised to find a petticoat underneath and was even more surprised when his hand slid under the petticoat to discovery that she was wearing underwear. He lifted his head to look at her and found her lipstick to be smudged, something he hadn’t noticed before they started kissing.
“I thought you didn’t wear underwear?”
“Normally I don’t, but my date insisted.”
His eyebrows rose. “Your date?” He repeated.
“It didn’t go well.” She huffed. “Now be a good boy and help me out of this shit.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice.” He chuckled. His hand slid around to her back, found the zipper of her dress and pulled it down with a practiced ease. She pulled it over her head and flung it gracelessly away from the bed, leaving her in just the white petticoat, underwear and nude colored bra. He unhooked her bra with the same ease as he had pulling down her zipper. When she flung the bra aside, he noticed angry red welts from the straps. “I think you need a new bra,”
“I don’t normally wear them.” She replied nonchalantly.
“That one is too small. You’re not supposed to get welts from the straps.”
“I know I love your voice, but I have better things for your mouth to do.”
He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows again. “Let me give you a shoulder massage first.”
“Fine.” She huffed.
Before he brought his hands to her shoulders however, he bent down and gently nosed the welts. Her head flung back against his shoulder, her rich brown curls crushing against his chest, and moaned. He knew it was from his mustache scraping against the tender skin. He placed soft kisses to each red mark then brought his hands to her shoulders. Another moan escaped her lips as his long fingers began to work their magic and she melted against him. He chuckled softly. “Feels good?”
“Oooh, you know it does. Thank you.”
He smirked, leaning down to kiss her curls. “Of course I know. I just wanted to hear you say it.”
“Tom,” She moaned.
“Yes Rose?”
“Enough with the massage. I’m still in my petticoat. This underwear is digging into my poor thighs.”
“Moan my name again,” He said, gripping onto her shoulders. “and I’ll see what I can do.”
“Tooooommmm.”
“God that was beautiful.” He replied, pressing his erection against her spine.
His hands stilled and he moved from behind her and pulled her to her feet. His hands went to her hips and pushed the petticoat down, making sure to catch the waistband of her underwear too.
“You know, your underwear’s too small too. It’s not supposed to dig into those gorgeous thighs.”
“Enough talking. You have better things to do with that glorious mouth of yours.”
He chuckled again. “That I do.”
He pushed her down against the mattress and slid between her parted thighs. He put them over his shoulders and shoved his face between them. His tongue slid between her labia majora and down until he hit her clitoris; he made sure to apply pressure to make her moan and she did so loudly. She moaned his name again, stretching it out like she had a few minutes before. The sound was enough to send more blood flow to his penis, making it press uncomfortably against his stomach.
Not wanting to cut their foreplay short, he slid a finger through her labia minora and into her vaginal opening, which was made easier by the secretion of vaginal fluid. While he moved his finger in and out of her vaginal opening, he made sure to ram her clitoris with his tongue. More vaginal fluid ran over his finger and he added a second finger to help prepare for when he finally slid his penis in.
“Tom,” She moaned. “I’m so close to orgasming. Be a good boy.”
He could feel how close she was as her knees gripped his shoulders tightly and by the swelling of her clitoris. In the two months since their last sexual encounter, he picked up a handy little trick; he brought his free hand to her lower stomach and pressed down as his tongue rammed into her clitoris. More vaginal fluid flowed over his fingers, he kept up the pace as she rode out her orgasm. If he hadn’t been buried nose deep in her vagina, he would’ve noticed her eyes rolling backward.
She chanted his name over and over again like a prayer.
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Rosemarie Seraphim giggled as the man she was about to fuck, Thomas Magnum, stumbled against her as the door of his apartment, technically he lived in the guesthouse on the main compound, swung open and caused her to stumble backwards. He tightened his grip on her to keep her from falling over and tumbling down the steps that led into the living room. His lips brushed against hers and she struggled with the urge to squirm at the feeling of his glorious bushy mustache against her face. Aside from making her want to squirm, it was probably the most erotic feeling she ever had.
She yanked him closer, causing his mustache to scrape against her face. Involuntary, a soft moan escaped from her lips. He pushed his pelvis against hers, forcing her to feel his growing erection. She stuck a pale hand between them and cupped his penis that was covered by the rough blue denim, causing him to moan into her mouth. The sound alone was enough for her to feel herself getting damp from a sudden secretion of vaginal fluid. Unfortunately, he wasn’t able to feel it yet.
He got another moan out of her as his mouth moved from hers and down her neck, his mustache tickling her skin once again. Having realized that to her, the sensation was erotic to her, he did it a fourth time. His large tan hands slid from her ass around to her hips where they slipped under her flowy lavender cotton shirt. The heat from his palms against her cooler stomach was another sensation she loved. He slowly pushed up her shirt, deliberately exposing the pale flesh underneath.
She slid her small arms from the sleeves and he pulled, forcing them apart for a brief moment. Carelessly, he dropped the top onto the tile flooring while she began tugging his navy-blue polo out from his light blue jeans; once out, he pulled it off and she bit her lip as she stared at the dark brown hair that covered his chest. Automatically, her hand reached out and her fingers closed around some of the hair, separating a small patch just below his dark pink nipple on the left side of his chest.
While she was enamored by the silky feeling of his chest hair, he brought one of his big hands to her right breast and cupped it. She began to stroke his chest, his broad hand gave her breast a squeeze. She mentally shook herself, breaking the spell the sight of his hairy chest had her under. She began on his belt, purposely brushing her hand against the bulge in his jeans, making him moan at the feeling. With one hand, he slid the belt through the loops and it clattered loudly against the dark tile. Once again, she brushed her hand against his erection, causing another moan to escape his lips, before starting on pushing the copper button of his jeans through its small hole.
Using his free hand once again, he pulled down his zipper and she pushed the denim fabric down his long legs. He stepped out of them while she kicked them aside, so neither of them would get their foot caught in them. Once again, she felt him press his erection against her, his penis harder than before. She reached through the whole in his boxers and wrapped her smaller hand around it.
“Jesus, Rose,” He moaned while she began to pull.
Her baby blue eyes fluttered shut as she listened to his voice say her name.
“Oh Tom,” She replied breathily. “Keep talking. I love the sound of your voice.”
She didn’t have to open her eyes to know that he was smirking. “Yours is absolutely gorgeous, just like you.” He murmured, his lips against hers. He finally released her breast and brought both of his hands to gently cradle her face in them. She couldn’t stop the dreamy sigh that escaped her. She parted her lips and teased him by lightly touching her tongue to his lips. He parted them eagerly in an invitation for her tongue to slip into his awaiting mouth. The taste of beer lingering in his mouth was a slight turn off, but she decided to ignore it as she lightly ran her tongue over his own.
She pulled away a little, breaking the kiss. “Say my name again.” She ordered breathily.
His hands fell away from her face and gripped onto her arms. “Rose, you will drive me insane.”
Her lips slowly curved into a smile. “Good boy,” She murmured. “I can’t wait to see you orgasm.”
He chuckled softly. “Very direct, aren’t you?”
She nodded eagerly. “Absolutely. Provided you have condoms.”
He raised a gloriously bushy brown eyebrow. “I’ll pull out.” He promised, kissing her once more.
She pulled away, taking a step backward. “That doesn’t prevent pregnancy.”
“Well,” He said in a measured tone. “Are you on the pill?”
She reached over and caressed his cheek. “Delicious man, I’m not just worried about pregnancy.” It was a struggle not to begin to stroke his mustache. “I am also worried about diseases.”
He pulled back, clearly offended. “I can assure you, I am clean.”
“I would love to take your word, beautiful man, sometimes it takes a while for symptoms to begin.” She explained. “I am not telling you no, I can’t wait to have sex with you, but I worry about safety.” He crossed his muscular arms over his glorious chest. “Please, I want to fuck you, Tom,”
“That’s such a crude word,” He muttered.
“It takes emotions, more than just attraction, to make love.”
“I feel more than just attraction to you!” He insisted.
She changed tactics, not wanting to keep screwing up the situation. “If you don’t have any,”
“Christ’s sake!” He said in a slightly louder voice. “Now you’re making things awkward!”
Her eyes darkened in a flash with anger. “Do not raise your voice at me.” Her tone was absolutely vicious. “If you don’t want to wear a fucking condom then fine. I will leave because I am not willing to risk the health and safety for both of us.” She turned away from him, searching for her shirt.
He reached out, attempting to stop her. “Rose,”
She took another step back. “Having unprotected sex is absolutely selfish.”
He dropped his hand. “I know.” He said in a hurt tone. “But I never said I wouldn’t wear one.” She waited for him to continue, saying nothing. “You took me by surprise. Not many women ask me.” She nodded. “No, I don’t have any currently, but I am willing to pick up a small box.” He finished.
“I apologize for not letting you answer.” She replied. “Most men lose interest when I bring it up.”
“Fools,” He chided, shaking his head as he took a step closer.
After a quick stop at the nearest pharmacy for the purchase of condoms, she convinced him to take his health seriously and talked him into buying a bigger box, they drove back to the estate. And by her being with him, it meant he was able to get past the Dobermans that patrolled the estate; he told her that Higgins, a little man who “ran security” of the compound would purposely set them loose. He explained that the man didn’t like the fact that he was at the compound, as he was invited by the owner, Robin Masters. He said the name like it was supposed to mean something to her, but she only shrugged as she was completely uninterested in the man who owned the property.
They entered guesthouse without issue from the large black dogs and she saw that he was relieved to find that Higgins hadn’t snuck any other guests in while they had driven to the pharmacy. He led her down the stairs and he tried to guide her toward what she assumed was the bedroom, but she stopped him, quickly unbuttoning his jeans. They went down after being unzipped quickly and pooled around his large feet. She shoved his boxers down his hips and they also rapidly joined the pile.
She was reaching for his shirt, but he stopped her by taking her hands.
“Slow down,” He said. “Let me take you to the bedroom.”
She tipped her head up to look at him. “I can’t. I need you now.”
In a split second, she was down on her knees and reaching for the bag from the pharmacy, wanting a condom on him yesterday. She was more than willing to give him oral sex, but not without the condom. She could still get a sexually transmitted disease while giving oral. She was not willing to risk that. He let her take the bag from him and place it on the floor under him. Her eagerness, as well as her commitment to both of their safety, was enticing to him. He peeled off his polo once more, letting her marvel at his dark chest hair before she took flaccid penis in her hand once more.
She was surprisingly gentle as she began to tug. The feeling of her small, soft, pale hands wrapping around his penis immediately sent a rush of blood to it. Her free hand cupped his testicles and she gave them a gently squeeze, to help send more blood rushing to his penis. His head fell back and he moaned loudly at the feeling. It was a struggle not to force said penis into her gorgeous mouth.
When she deemed that he was erect enough, she carefully opened the condom, not wanting it to tear accidentally. He let out a moan as she purposely brushed her fingers against his hard erection.
“God Rose,” He moaned. “Stop teasing me with your fingers.”
A soft sigh escaped her lips, but she carefully slid the condom on his erected penis without any purposely brushing her fingers against his penis while sliding it on him. She knew, from conversations in the past with other men, that condoms felt uncomfortable and she was glad Tom hadn’t argued with her about using one. She took it to mean that he wanted to take each other’s health seriously. It felt uncomfortable in her mouth as well and the taste of the latex was an immense turn off, but she took her mind off her discomfort and began to focus on pleasing him. She took his large, protected penis in her mouth. She took him into her mouth slowly, not wanting to throw up.
He didn’t immediately thrust into her mouth, like men had done with her in the past, but had let her take control of the situation. She hummed in appreciation, the vibration sending another rush of blood to his penis. Gradually she was able to take him all the way in, all the way to the back of her throat. He let out a louder moan, one of his hands to her light brown Farrah Fawcett hair and tangled his fingers in it. She brought a hand to his thigh and dug her nails in a little in warning. Just as gradually as she pushed his penis into her mouth, she began to take his penis out of her mouth.
“Sorry, I don’t like hair pulling.” She announced. She wasn’t sorry, but she wanted to teach him what she liked to have done to her in hopes of actually having an orgasm. Most men rebuffed her.
“I understand,” He murmured. “I don’t like it being done to me either.”
She smiled up at him. “Thank you for telling me.”
She began to fondle his testicles while slowly beginning to take his penis into her mouth again. She could tell that he was resisting the urge to thrust roughly into her mouth, forcing her to take his penis into her mouth. She was grateful that resisted he the urge; she hated when men did that to her. She gave his testicles another squeeze, earning a deep moan from him, before starting to bob her head. She knew that men ejaculated to the sensation her taking their penis in and out of her warm mouth.
“Rose,” He moaned loudly as she continued to bob her head and fondle his testicles.
Fuck she found his deep voice intoxicating. Especially when he used it to say her name. Hearing him moan it was also intoxicating. She knew that he was close to ejaculating when she felt his penis twitch in her mouth. She kept up her pace, even hollowing out her cheeks as she slowly pulled it out. He resisted his urge to thrust into her mouth, not wanting her to trigger her gag reflex.
His penis twitched again and she felt through the latex that he was ejaculating inside of the condom; she knew, from glowing reviews from men in the past, that she performed oral sex amazingly. She kept bobbing her head, keeping pace and wanting to drain him of ejaculation fluid. Wanting to have a mind-blowing orgasm. She felt his thighs tremble against her face and she mentally smirked.
He ejaculated into the condom yelling Rose at the top of his lungs. She hoped the Dobermans were nowhere near the guesthouse. Not wanting them to start barking at the sound of his loud voice.
When his penis finally stopped twitching, she took it from her mouth and carefully slid it off his penis. Breathless, he told her where the guest bathroom was and she ducked inside to dispose of the condom. At first he protested, saying he only needed to catch his breath, but she ignored him. She told him they, in no uncertain terms, were not going to reuse the condom. It would give her an infection. He agreed to her point and let her throw the latex away. They had plenty of condoms.
Once he caught his breath, he got to his feet and guided her into the guest bedroom as he kissed her intensely. Tongues back into to play as he forced her to walk backwards to the bed. He pinned her against the bed and broke their kiss to take her shirt off once more; she let him take a moment to marvel at her bare breasts again, before taking control of the situation, pushing his hand away from the box of condoms. “No, no, no.” She said forcefully. “I need stimulation too you know.”
He gave her a confused look. “I know, that’s why I was going for another condom.”
She placed the hand against her cheek. “Women don’t orgasm the same way men do.” She began to explain. “They don’t orgasm by men thrusting in and out of her vagina. There is no feeling there.”
He looked surprised. “They don’t?”
She shook her head. “We have what’s called a clitoris. It’s a small bundle of nerves that need the stimulation.” She continued. “I hate to tell you this, but every woman you’ve had sex with faked it.”
“Ouch. That’s a huge blow to my ego.” He muttered, caressing her cheek with his thumb.
“Don’t worry,” She replied with a brilliant smile. “I show you what I need to orgasm.”
She let him start by taking off her beige, loose fitting linen pants; he commented on her lack of panties and she actually cringed. She informed him that she found the word disgusting and would prefer if he used underwear instead. He agreed and asked if she had planned having sex with him. She didn’t take offense. It wasn’t the first time she had been accused of that. She calmly explained to him that she only wore underwear when necessary, like when she was got her period, and not for the enjoyment of a potential partner she wanted to have sex with. Again, that took him by surprise.
She explained to him that she wanted him to use his finger to press against her clitoris. She also used his hand to guide him to where it was located, explaining that women had three openings. Still guiding him, she pushed his index finger against her clitoris and explained how amazing it felt to her. She dropped her hand away from his and let him press his finger against the nerves himself. She moaned and encouraged him to continue the pressure against her tight clitoris. He used a steady pressure of his knuckle, which she also encouraged him to use, against her clitoris. She promised him that it would fit and it felt amazing to her. She also told him he could use his mouth.
Slowly, she felt her orgasm being to form. He kept up the pressure and rubbed her clitoris after she explained that it also felt amazing to her. She also encouraged him to talk about anything to her. He eventually understood that his voice was like a drug to her and she especially loved when he said her name. He found that he enjoyed hearing her moan his name as she eventually orgasmed on his knuckle alone. She had already explained that women secreted fluid during their orgasms.
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when a child with chronic or terminal illness or a disability/their sibling is well informed about the condition strangers love to say "no child should have to know that 😢" yeah well i think the world would be significantly better if more children knew about that actually. teach your healthy kids about illness teach your abled kids about disability Please !
and people will say this about the stupidest shit of all time. a diabetic child is like "this is my glucose monitor! these are my ketone test strips!" and people are aghast "no baby should have to know about this!!!!" okay so youd rather his mom just poked and tested him and injected insulin and collected his urine without explanation? you genuinely would prefer this child live in fear and ignorance about the daily routines of his life? because like no amount of pouty faces and prayers and condescending instagram comments are going to remove the illness from the child's life so our options are being informed about our bodies or being confused/frightened by them.
Computers are so scary what if I accidentally hit F12 in a steam game and it takes a screenshot. What if I press shift + F12 while in word and accidentally save my document 😖
If you had to learn what the F keys on your computer do through me reblogging this post, then I'm glad you did. Computer literacy is not a skill that gets taught anymore, and it is absolutely one that needs to be taught in order to be learned. Don't ever feel bad for not knowing something, but ☝️ don't ever stop learning learning about your environment, the tools you use, and especially the people around you