Puns, Ponies and Podcasts

I was GM and producer for Crudely Drawn Swords, also a horseman, game designer, musician, book fan, pun afficionado, programmer, weirdo know-it-all and occasional wizard. This used to be the CDS tumblr account, but I'm taking it for myself and nobody can stop me, or indeed cares.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Did I mention I have a book for sale? And that it's a fantasy detective adventure story that makes a valentines-day-appropriate hard pivot to romance in the last third?

It also has plenty of content for the mule fans out there, making it the ideal read for anyone who likes mules, romance, or both:

The Redstone Rescue

### A light-hearted utopian fantasy detective story “They say the crown lies heavy on the head of the king, but in Sataminva our crown lies

[crudely-drawn-ben]

I know what you're thinking: "I do like mules and romance, but I also want to believe that a better world is possible. Is there a book like that which replaces traditional fantasy feudalism with utopian politics?"

Friend, this is your lucky day...

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Some will say: "I do like mules, romance and utopian politics, but these are heavy topics and I want something easy to read. More of a fast-moving adventure story, perhaps with a kick-ass narrator who makes plenty of jokes along the way." I don't know what to tell you, it's like I've thought of everything. You can read the first chapter right here - why not give it a shot?

[crudely-drawn-ben]

It occurs to me tha Tumblr might enjoy these pictures of knights I took the other day at Carew Castle.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

A spaceship that came out of a perspective exercise today.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Some Spout Lore fan-art - A4 and the Highspear. Listen to Spout Lore, it's excellent.

[byjove]

Perhaps the Holy Grail is nothing at all, perhaps the Holy Grail is the the nebulous concept of total wholeness and true satisfaction at one’s accomplishments. Perhaps the Questing Beast is the unending resentment we hold and the retribution we chase, resolution always alluding us. ORRRRRRRR maybe the Holy Grail is a sickkkkkkk chalice Jesus drunk out of at the Last Supper and the Questing Beast is a freaky critter someone needs to deal with RIGHT NOW. Won’t know until I finish these quests.

[mobilis-in-mobili]

maybe the real holy grail is the friends we made along the way

[byjove]

- King Arthur trying to comfort his knights after they failed the Grail quest for the third time in a row.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

The Holy Grail is a golden cup that brings great prosperity to those who hold it. Even now eleven of our finest and most beloved knights contend for it against the heroes of other realms. Last time they were victorious they brought four bright years for old England; there was even a summer of love.

Every time they depart our people hope that maybe this time they shall be pure and strong enough to bring it home again, but the trials are great and the opposition terrible in their skill. Indeed many of their knights contend in our tourneys outside of the Grail Quest, while the Isle of the Mighty is not what it once was. It is only the slimmest hope, dashed to pieces year after year, almost too fragile to endure. And yet the hope remains.

[textpostscymraeg]

Hullo! I'm new here. Have you ever spoken on the usage of latin alphabet, any existing predecessors, or what you/others would see as an ideal written language system for Cymru?

Extremely boring answer, but... I've never thought about it! The Welsh language and the Latin script have gone hand in hand for centuries upon centuries; the ancient version of Welsh that didn't use the Latin alphabet is so divorced from my experience of modern Welsh that I can't really imagine anything but the written language system we use now, and have used since roughly 800AD!

I'm aware that some ancient Welsh scribes may have used the Irish Ogham alphabet, which is very likely the inspiration behind Coelbren y Beirdd, a fake script created by Iolo Morganwg in the 1800s:

It's cool! But ultimately not real. Call me boring, but I'm happy with what we have! However, you've definitely piqued my interest into learning more about Ogham and the Celtic vigesimal system - watch this space!

[crudely-drawn-ben]

We have a few ogham stones in Carmarthenshire and Pembrokeshire but they're mostly in areas where there was a lot of trade with/raiding from Ireland. That seems to be where the system was mostly used.

People underestimate how romanised the British were by the time the Romans left. British iron-age culture seems to have been largely built on oral traditions - if people were writing things down they weren't doing it on anything that survives today, and traditions of memorised lore made it to the medieval era at least. So for all practical purposes the Roman alphabet has always been the Welsh alphabet.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Today's quick-paint is from yesterday's sunset over the Menai Strait.

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Today's quick-paint is from our visit to Llanberis on Wednesday, featuring the tower of Dolbadarn castle.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Today's weather was better for a quick paint but infinitely worse for a walk in the mountains.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

I wanted to do some quick paints from this holiday but the devil detail crept in on this attempt at the view across Glyder Fach and so I've only managed one so far.

[wereshrew-admirer]

aaaugh - thank goodness for the online guides*, or i'd never have made it past this level! it feels like i've been staring at this loading screen for almost a year....

(*and @mrmarielda, who colored the Little Snail and its occupants)

[effiecalvin]

everyone is trying to climb in my window today

[crudely-drawn-ben]

- Heathcliff (Kate Bush version)

[fanyeline]

For Secret Samol I decided to make a Partizan anime fanvid.

@cyan-historian I hope you like it!!! 

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Reposting this again because I remembered it and then had to go tracking back through years of Tumblr to find it. So freaking good.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

Sometimes you do a joke because it has crossed your mind and now you have to put it into the world even though it is probably only going to appeal to a handful of people.

[probablybadrpgideas]

The realm has instituted mandatory standardized education and since wizardry is a basic skill like reading, writing and arithmetic everyone graduates primary education with a level in wizard and secondary education with several wizard levels.

this used to be the case, but with cuts on "less employable" subjects you're lucky to find somewhere that offers magic at a-level outside of specialist colleges

[crudely-drawn-ben]

This is kind of what The Incandescent by Emily Tesh is about. It's very good.

[effiecalvin]

tumblr keeps recommending that Pretend to Be Ants in a Colony to me and while it's not super appealing I think it would be fun to Pretend to be Guards in a Castle

[effiecalvin]

I love patrolling this hallway at a perfectly measured pace at exact intervals and I love my helmet which prevents me from seeing anything in my peripheral vision.

[effiecalvin]

I love leaving my big giant ring of keys on their special hook in full view of the prisoners. You might say it's a security flaw but actually there's no way they could possibly use the items around them to cobble together some sort of makeshift tool and--oh fuck. Oh shit. Oh damn.

[thegirlundertherainbowumbrella]

Umm... hi. Quick question: is this like, a high-security prison? With 2FA and everything...? Asking for no reason at all.

[effiecalvin]

We've got the big front door up there and if someone comes up we yell "WHO GOES THERE" and if it's a bad guy then we just don't open the door.

Oh and just down this hole is the underground sewer which conveniently lets out just outside the city walls but I don't think we need to guard that tbh.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

It's not like anybody could even get to the sewer hole on account of our incredibly regular and carefully scheduled guard patrols that mean there is basically no way they could get there without being seen.

I mean sure there is technically a tiny gap between patrols that somebody could slip into but we've never caught anybody doing that so the system clearly works.

[darkshrimpemotions]

Crucial to understanding the gender politics of Dracula is that when the men exclude Mina to protect her they are WRONG. They are manifestly wrong according to the text and it isn't ambiguous. Jonathan dislikes hiding things from Mina. It isn't natural to their relationship, which has always been one of equal partners. Mina hates it and is distressed by it. Once again Van Helsing and Jack are smugly sure it's the right thing to do, having learned nothing from Lucy's fate.

Everyone is all "I suppose we must play our gender roles as god intended" but the narrative lets us know this is a bad idea because it almost dooms them all. Dracula gets to Mina because they shut her out, even after it was her studiousness and thoughtfulness that brought them well over half the vital information they have. And they would not have defeated him without her. If he had killed her before they realized what he was doing, they would all have been doomed. They were a hair's breadth from losing everything due to their insistence on treating Mina like a helpless baby for just a few days. As it was, they lost plenty for taking so long to cut it the fuck out.

[crudely-drawn-ben]

If you enjoyed this post you might also enjoy Strange Beasts by Susan J Morris, in which the Harkers' daughter - working for the same post-Dracula monster hunting organisation as Van Helsing - goes hunting for a terrible beast in Paris with Moriarty's daughter. It's a really good time and I'm sure it would play even better if you were a big Dracula fan.