DemonGrocer

They/Them

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Nobody seems inclined to shut the fuck up on their own so I made this handy graphic that I might just start rudely appending to my random life update posts. Everyone feel free to use it on your own posts.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

@thebibliosphere you might need this

[thebibliosphere]

you’d be right

[joyouslemniscate]

Image id: a long bullet-point list, mostly in plain text except the first and last lines which are large and rainbow colored.

Rainbow text: STOP giving me life advice!

Regular text on all the following lines, until noted otherwise:

- I didn't fucking ask.

- I don't know you. I have no reason to think that you know what you're talking about.

- Your advice is stupid and it makes you look stupid.

- A two sentence facetious tumblr post does not give you enough context about my life to offer advice.

- I didn't fucking ask.

- I don't know you and you don't know what you're talking about.

- If your smug little off-the-cuff response took you less than five minutes to think of, I guarantee I've already tried it or it doesn't apply to my situation.

- Because you don't know what you're talking about.

- And I'm not a fucking idiot.

- Your advice sure makes you look like a fucking idiot though.

- It's bad advice. That I didn't ask for.

- It's stupid advice and it makes you look stupid.

- Seriously, just think for like five seconds. About how conceited and self-aggrandising you're being. And how stupid you clearly must think I am.

- When you assume that your thirty seconds musing on a situation you know nothing about is somehow valuable to me.

- Because clearly I'm too much of a fucking idiot to think of something that obvious by myself. Good thing I have your genius take to remind me that thrift shops or food pantries or farmer's markets or Etsy or whatever the fuck you're recommending exists.

- Good thing I have you dipshits to tell me how to grow a garden or cook a soup or use up my lemons or eggs or choose birthday presents.

- Too bad I didn't fucking ask.

- I've been polite about your stupid fucking ideas for years and my patience is running thin. I'm about to start blocking you motherfuckers.

- STOP GIVING ME LIFE ADVICE.

Rainbow text: I didn't fucking ask!

End image id.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#thank you op#found out a few months ago I have a rare disability#which explains why I’ve tried every possible bit of advice and none of it worked even a little#and getting told to try -insert most basic generic possible solution- every time I talk about it makes me want to do a violence#this is such a great way of expressing why that’s frustrating

People who give disabled people "obvious" or "simple" life advice should have to hand them five dollars with the advice. Yes every time.

[mongeese]

The Murderbot Diaries are a power fantasy about being aromantic and still developing extremely important dedicated emotionally intimate partnerships where you are a top priority in a person's life, equal to their other family or romantic attachments despite your own emotional difficulties. And having guns in your arms

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Are those expensive "gamer chairs" actually comfy? Asking for a friend (who can't afford one anyway).

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Every time I mention furniture on this website a bunch of people in the notes for some reason assume that I live within Ikea's delivery radius. I have absolutely no idea why people assume this. Ikea is six hours away. Also their furniture is fragile and I do not like to sit on it, but mostly, they are six fucking hours away.

[demongrocer]

In my limited experience, office chairs are better for the body and last longer than gamer chairs

I have a Steelcase Leap (which was, admittedly, an investment), which I have liked

As with things like mattresses that one spends a lot of time in / on, it is helpful to be able to try one in person, though of course that's often not possible

[laserbobcat]

Writing characters be like "Ok what neurodivergence do i give to this one"

[intheafterlight]

Writing characters be like "Ok what aspect of my own neurodivergence did I already give this one without realising?"

[laserbobcat]

Playing DnD be like "Oh I just realized that's the 5th character I write who's obsessed with food, is overworked and has a terrible relationship with their father but surely this means nothing about myself"

[aughtpunk]

Okay so many years ago when my mother read the first rough draft of my novel Echo of the Larkspur she congratulated me on writing the most realistic autistic character she's ever read before

And I just remember sitting there going that can't be right, that character just thinks the same way I do and *I'm* not autistic, she's totally in the wrong about that

Fellas, I bet you cannot guess what I was diagnosed with shortly afterwards, you simply can't

[earhartsease]

be us writing a novel about someone who finally discovers they're able to be two people, one a boy and one a girl, a decade before coming out as trans, and two decades before realising we were plural and it was way more nuanced than "a boy and a girl" so we're still trying to write it

[dragon-age-tournament]

The 2026 Dragon Age Census Survey

It's time!

The goal of this survey is to collect data on the demographics of and choices made by the Tumblr-based Dragon Age fandom. Everything is 100% anonymous, and all questions on the form are skippable - just keep in mind that the more questions you answer, the more accurate and thorough the data will be!

The form is split into the following sections:

Voter demographics and series-wide preferences - this asks things like your age range, gender, favourite game in the series, and which mainline and side-content installments you've played

Choices specific to and your preferences within Dragon Age: Origins

Choices specific to and your preferences within Draon Age II

Choices specific to and your preferences within Dragon Age: Inquisition

Choices specific to and your preferences within Dragon Age: The Veilguard

And a very optional bonus section where you're invited to share your more specific opinion on each individual main game and companion, along with a place to share any feedback on the blog and suggestions for future tournaments!

This form will remain open for a month - submissions will be accepted until July 7th, and results will be shared shortly after.

>> SURVEY LINK <<

[asexual-amanita]

Happy pride month! Please remember to include disabled people in your festivities this year! This includes:

- Hiring sign language interpreters

- Ensuring venues are step free

- Making dedicated sensory safe spaces

- Providing free masks

- Including braille or audio described signage

- Using plain language in speeches

Yes it’s more work, but pride is for everyone, it’s needs to be inclusive.

[asexual-amanita]

Also, if you are a non-disabled person reading this, please help advocate for accessibility. It gets tiring being the only person fighting for basic access rights.

[flowercrowncrip]

More ideas from a powerchair user:

Hiring a mobile changing places toilet for people who can’t use standard accessible toilets– these are fitted with an adult size changing table, hoist and room for a someone with a large wheelchair and two carers to move around in.

If your event is on grass create pathways with mats to avoid people getting stuck in mud if it’s rained recently

Covering cables in a way that allows wheelchairs users to go over them independently and painlessly (please install a ramps if you use those ones that look like speed bumps)

Wheelchair access to any stages especially if acts are inviting members of the audience on stage at any point… maybe you have no wheelchair users performing, but you never will if it’s not accessible

Publish details about the length and surface of any march. Is it hilly? Is the road covered in potholes? How long is it?

[eldritchbauble]

You should be immediately suspicious of anyone who tries to convince you to hate other trans people.

[trippedintoa-volcano]

Imagine that everywhere in the mechanical engineering world suddenly got infatuated with lasers.

Lasers have a lot of uses! Measuring things, heating things, cutting things, entertaining cats, particle physics. Lasers are pretty cool. Very versatile, very useful, potential to be very powerful.

Someone shows up one day and says "I have developed a never before seen technology! I call it a Death Star."

And it's a 3.4mW laser. Well no, we haven't seen this exact size of laser much since that's not really standard, but that's a bit of a misnomer, and I wouldn't call it new -

"HOLY SHIT GUYS! This Death Star is so entertaining! My cat loves it and it has such a nice color!" The Death Star becomes a viral novelty, and is mildly entertaining, as laser pointers often are.

Somehow, seemingly overnight, this leads to mania. "Lets stick lasers in EVERYTHING! The public loves them!"

More companies make 3.4mW lasers to jump on the bandwagon. Everyone that makes anything vaguely mechanical starts sticking lasers into their designs.

Everyone is calling them Death Stars. Any time there is a "Death Star innovation", it is just that they made a bigger laser.

Ford's next truck comes out and it has "Death Star integrated headlights", where they have just stuck giant lasers in place of their previously functional headlights.

An electric toothbrush is now "Powered by Death Stars" and shoots a laser at the tooth its cleaning. You think that maybe this could have actual applications as a sanitizing device if you're being generous, but when you actually look at the product, its laser has no purpose but to point at the tooth and drain the battery.

Mechanical products across the board get noticeably worse as everyone starts stuffing lasers in places where lasers have no right to be.

The lamp business gets in on it. "Here's a Death Star powered lamp!" These guys haven't even tried to stick a laser in their damn lamps. They've just started calling their light bulbs Death Stars and hoped you bought it before you could tell the difference. You at least appreciate that they haven't ruined their lamp about it.

Death Stars are lauded as the solution to all the world's problems. If it's not working, you should stick a laser in it! That'll fix it, everyone says. Once in a blue moon, it's even true! Weather prediction is really good now. But most things are garbage. Like "Death Star powered washing machines". What the fuck does that even mean?

Meanwhile, since all functioning mechanisms are being replaced with lasers, problems start showing up. All mirrors now cost $1000+ dollars, because the whole supply is being used up to make more lasers. The earth heats up, because everyone's blasting lasers at everything. People keep going blind, on account of all the lasers.

You, in fact, study optical mechanics. You know what a laser is, and how it works, and that it was invented many years before any of this nonsense actually started. People keep asking you about Death Stars, since surely you must know so much about them.

You explain that this is not really what lasers are for, except you have to call them Death Stars now, and that they're causing a lot of harm, so you don't like them much.

"Oh, but they're still such new tech!" they reply. "They'll figure out how to make Death Stars that don't burn your eyes out soon, and then it won't be an issue anymore!"

Somewhere, deep and buried, you remember lasers being used in particle accelerators, or in telescopes, or in laser cutters, or funny cat videos. They are, in fact, still interesting. Still cool.

But by this point they have replaced roads with "Death Star Powered Pathways", which are just laser pointers propped up on tooth picks pointing vaguely through the forests.

And you think you are going mad.

And they are still just FUCKING LASERS.

This post is about AI.

[thatlittleegyptologist]

"Using an Oxford comma is a sign of AI"

bestie boo, let me fill you in on something: if you're going to take any part of 'good grammar' and randomly assign it to She's A Witch! AI, you might as well give up. It's over. You're cooked. Anyone who has spent the last decade or more learning to type properly, anyone who has spent any time writing articles/papers/essays that require you to use 'good grammar' is going to fall into that 'oh no it might be AI' trap.

Stop hunting like it's 1692. You're not going to find Goody Proctor at the ChatGPT sacrament. What you're going to do is exactly what happened back then: harming people who've done nothing wrong.

[arviyya]

can I reblog this a million times

[byjove]

I do not agree with veganism as a moral standard. If it is your personal moral stance, that is fine. If you think humans eating meat is inherently immoral, I don’t want to deal with you, you’re hopeless. Vegan ideology behaves more like a sect of evangelical Christianity than a dietary choice.

[literallycrashingoutrn]

Veganism is better for the environment, but claiming that it's a morally superior choice ignores cultural and economic factors that make people eat animal products.

[byjove]

It is not inherently better for the environment. That is the thing. When you begin trying to explain that local, sustainably sourced animal protein is better for the environment than imported plant proteins that are farmed 3,500 miles away using slave labor, they start tuning you out. Down is better for the environment than polyester stuffing, leather is better for the environment than pleather. We should work on making animal agricultural practices more sustainable instead of trying to shame everyone into eating plant products that are also farmed unethically and unsustainably.

[punkitt-is-here]

quirky fourth wall breaking character but theyre just fucking. wrong about the medium theyre in. they keep making references to cinematic techniques and directorial styles and the other fourth wall breaking character is like "dumbass we're in a fucking comic book" and they are in a video game.

[totally-cis-offical]

Well currently they’re in a tumblr post but I see your point

[moon-of-curses]

we're actually in a youtube video if this turns out to be funny enough

[shamebats]

Tumblr is arguing about whether trans men have male privilege at the same time as TikTok is arguing about whether trans women have male privilege (they're always years behind on the discourse) and it's making me realize how many of the arguments are pretty much exactly the same and how in both cases, it's clear that it isn't actually about accurate assessments of people's privileges, people just love to come up with excuses to argue with trans people rather than actually helping us in any material way.

[shamebats]

You can't really argue against vague accusations of privilege in any way that would change anyone's mind. You might think "but the difference is that trans women are women and deal with misogyny" would do the trick but that's not what they're arguing — they're saying that being raised as a boy child and treated by society as a boy or man means you got to enjoy certain privileges even if you don't actually identify that way.

This argument can go either way, and people who believe trans women have male privilege don't necessarily believe that trans men don't. Because it's often just a way of saying "as a cis woman I'm used to seeing myself as the most oppressed person in the room at all times but your personal experience challenges that perception I have of myself so I'll choose to believe that being touched by maleness in any way makes you inherently privileged in some way that I am not and it's my job to call you out on that" rather than you know, listening to trans people's experiences without making it about yourself.

[shamebats]

I don't care if trans men, trans women, intersex or non-binary people have "male privilege". Let's say we all do? Maybe butch cis women/women with short haircuts who don't wear makeup and have hairy legs also have male privilege. Maybe assumed-male fetuses have male privilege because they're less likely to get aborted in some parts of the world. Maybe if a woman gets briefly mistaken for a man and someone is nice to her in that moment, that's male privilege. Maybe it doesn't fucking matter and it's a total waste of our time to debate shit like this when most trans people in the world still aren't protected from discrimination and don't have access to the resources they need.

[shamebats]

Some of you, if you'd been alive and sentient during the AIDS epidemic would've been like "ok but like... they're men? Sure they're dying and stuff but have you considered that being able to go out and have sex freely is male privilege? Some of us can't do that because we'd get pregnant and die in childbirth and I don't see these dying queer men caring about that so... why would I care?"

[shamebats]

My response to "trans people have male privilege" arguments is just: ok, let's say that's true, do you still support our cause? Would you march with us? Advocate for our rights? Or would the supposed male privilege negate all of our struggles just like how it protected an entire generation of queer men from dying fully preventable deaths?

[northstareclipse]

A lot of criticism of delivery apps focuses on the fact that they offer convenience and variety, which I find much less compelling than criticizing the fact that the apps often send their contractors on fetch quests from Hell.

There are real labor problems here. Base pay is often insulting. Customer tips carry too much of the burden. Workers need better protections, more transparent algorithms, protection from arbitrary deactivation, and actual recourse when the app or a customer screws them over. Car-dependent delivery is also an environmental and infrastructural problem, though in a denser city I’d still be doing this work; I’d just be doing it by bike.

But when people talk about delivery work, I rarely see them talk to actual delivery workers. I see a lot of abstract arguments about convenience, consumer decadence, “hustle culture,” and internalized neoliberalism. Meanwhile, when I’m out working and waiting in restaurants for orders, the other Dashers I meet are usually people who only speak Spanish, people who read as neurodivergent, visibly physically disabled people, or some combination of the above.

I have not met this mythical Disco Elysium poor ultraliberal hustlegrinder-wannabe people seem to be arguing with. Maybe that archetype exists somewhere. If it exists among any kind of gig worker, it would probably be rideshare drivers. But most of what I see looks less like “rise and grind” and more like “this is one of the few forms of work available to people who need flexibility, low barriers to entry, limited managerial surveillance, or a way to work around language barriers, disability, burnout, chronic illnesses and injuries with symptoms that come and go unpredictably, caregiving, résumé gaps, or discrimination.”

That does not make the current system good. It means the current system is filling a real gap that a lot of supposedly better systems do not even acknowledge.

As a disabled person who is burnout-prone and demand-sensitive, contracting as a delivery driver has given me an unprecedented level of financial flexibility. I can work when I have capacity. I can stop when I’m deteriorating. I can build my day around my actual body instead of being trapped under a manager who thinks “reliable” means “able to perform the same way every day no matter what.” That matters. It does not cancel out the exploitation, but it is also not fake just because it is politically inconvenient.

And delivery itself is not some inherently decadent evil. Sometimes people live alone. Sometimes they are sick. Sometimes they are disabled, exhausted, overwhelmed, grieving, overloaded, or recovering from something else - perhaps the stress and fatigue induced by their own job. Sometimes they need medicine, groceries, or a meal that will actually unplug their sinuses instead of whatever generic community-care slop someone thinks they should be grateful for. Humans are allowed to need specificity. “Food” is not the same as “the food I can actually eat right now.”

A serious labor critique would ask how to make delivery work safer, better-paid, less tip-dependent, less car-dependent, less algorithmically punitive, and less precarious. It would ask what kinds of flexible, accessible work should exist for people who cannot thrive in conventional employment. It would ask how cities could support bike delivery, worker cooperatives, public infrastructure, and real protections without simply replacing one bad system with a moral sermon about how nobody should ever want takeout.

But a lot of the discourse does not do that. It treats convenience itself as suspicious. It treats wanting flexible work as false consciousness. It treats the needs of disabled people, immigrants, and other people who can't fit into traditional employment structures as details to be swept aside in favor of a cleaner political image.

I guess the opinions of delivery workers only count when they are politically convenient.

[vodcar]

country gnomes,

take my bones

[cryptidfuckery]

to a place,

they don't belong

[annabellioncourt]

see shit like this is the reason that it’s so hard to turn my back on this website. Where else, pray tell, are you going to find this kind of quality nonsense.

[druggeddraccus]

west virginia

[creekfiend]

ohhh my god "hermeneutical injustice" thats just The Thing I Am Alwyas Thinking About But Dudnt Have Words For which is SO IRONIC

also remember when i was trying ti describe something a few weeks ago and i said "I'm sure if i knew more about philosophy i would be able to seat these thoughts somewhere legible"

(shaking fist) PHILOSOPHYYYYY

[thewayforward]

Okay, looks like I will be going down this rabbit hole tonight.

Just finished Wikipedia's epistemic injustice page (wherein/under which hermeneutical injustice is housed) and holy shit. BARS!

"The term was coined by British philosopher Miranda Fricker in 1998.[1] In her book Epistemic Injustice: Power & the Ethics of Knowing[2], Fricker explains how socially privileged groups are given an “excess of credibility”, meaning they are treated as the authority on their own experiences, but also those of others different from them. Conversely, oppressed groups experience a “credibility deficit”, where they are regarded as unqualified to describe even their own experiences. The assignment of this credibility or lack thereof is often a result of existing systemic hierarchies and normative standards, both of which are often so deeply ingrained within societies that even members of marginalized groups may become convinced of its truth."

[creekfiend]

👏👏👏👏👏

[inbabylontheywept]

i am banned from eating my herring inside. they make me eat it on the smoking area by the loading dock, under the theory that it already smells bad there. but it was raining today which was preventing my breakfast, so i was feeling sad and hungry and then i realized that there was a large cardboard box in the dumpster from a previous delivery. like a fridge sized box. so i fished it out of the dumpster, then tipped it on its side and had a nice little cardboard cave to watch the rain and eat my fish in. which was a great experience. very soothing. very zen. at least until the security guard from the day before stepped outside to smoke. then i tried hiding from him by crawling deeper in the box, which unfortunately did not work. instead he saw a sort of damp sniveling pale hairless creature eating fish in a box, and delivered the verbal killshot of "good morning, mr. smeagol." which is how my day was ruined before 8 am.

[butterflypeaflowertea]

it’s so nice being fond of people on here :-) like yeah maybe we only know each other in a very limited way but i care abt you guys & hearing abt your lives makes me happy & i like listening to the things u have to say & i really truly wish the best for you all!!! sending my love from a couple states, countries, oceans away