Ok so as it turns out I actually crushed on a real life man kinda??? But I have a feeling he'd be homophobic if we ever actually met and he's like wayyyy older than me so now I'm gonna self ship with a stand in/OC. IDK what traits to keep or not.
Ok so it's been a few days and I got the perfect solution and sorta coming out too. I'm actually aegogender so I'm detached from gender and myself. Directly selfshipping was too much for me (caused gender dysphoria ironically enough) but I did the normal next best thing
Yeah you heard that right, so I made a female harem of monster girls except he's the one being sexualized. Call that 4d chess. We got:
♥ Mimi, a bedrotter braty mushroom girl
♥ Florette, the cutesy whimsical deer girl
♥ Magnolia, based on the tree, she's the elegant and stationary steady presence
♥ Delilah, a tormentor demon, she has visited the male protagonist at night and mauls him in her hellhound form. Trying to break his will and collect his soul of resistance, she makes an offer with him only for him to refuse, believing he'll die. It turns out to be hallucination powers, and many months later she comes back and he remembers her. This time she presents herself in a skimpy outfit and curvaceous female form. Cue a toxic relationship that's mostly one sided. Noticeably, the other girls don't like her.
♥ Male protagonist. I don't have a name for him to be honest since I wanted him to be ambiguous in ethnicity and a name could imply one. I'll say that he's leaner rather than muscular, he's got black curly hair and a full beard. I haven't decided if he has more hair on his body or not.
But good looks aside, he's genuinely sweet and all these women reveal a different side of him too.
He gives Mimi some rotting fruit and checks up on her bedrotting self. Though she is bratty so he'll tease her or praise her when she does something well.
Gives refuge to a scared Florette being gentle with her and holding her hand like a gentleman.
He's patient and accommodates Magnolia by showing her himself and sometimes some odd trinkets here and there even if he has to crouch to reach her drooping head.
He's submissive and in an abusive relationship with Delilah that makes even the other girls chime in.
