Live, Laugh, Fangirl

26F pieces, INFJ, lee, teacher. Fandom trash + memes <3

[depsidase]

[oneheadtoanother]

[dankmemeuniversity]

[larvitarr]

[seite]

and then they proceeded to be the worst at their jobs for the next 20 years

[sindri42]

No no, you don’t get it. Jesse and James are the absolute best there is at their jobs, but they have no idea what their jobs are.

They think that they’re thieves, agents of an elite criminal group led by Giovanni, stealing rare pokemon and advanced technology and such. And there might have been a time this actually was their jobs. In the first season or two, they frequently get angry phone calls about how they’ve fucked everything up, or get their expense account cut off because they have literally never turned a profit on their criminal enterprises and constantly procure and then lose/destroy expensive and elaborate devices.

But then the world came within a hair’s breadth of being destroyed, several times, and Jesse, James, and their weird cat rescued everybody. As terrible as they’ve always been at criminal endeavors of any kind, when the apocalypse approaches and they’re forced to step up, they’re really fucking good at saving the day.

And Giovanni is over here like… if the planet is destroyed, or time/space becomes unrecognizable, or civilization collapses, there’s no way for me to run a profitable criminal enterprise anymore. I need this planet, because it’s where I keep all my stuff. And I don’t pretend to understand the why of it, but these couple of bumbling nutcases that I should have fired years ago seem to be an important component of that? Somehow? So you gotta stop thinking about them in terms of acquisitions and start considering them… loss prevention. As in, even if you waste a million dollars a month on giant cat-faced robots and a vast array of fancy ball gowns and they never turn a profit, they are preventing all of your assets from going away at the same time because of something you can’t do anything about.

And that’s the great secret behind Team Rocket. These guys aren’t thieves, they’re professional superheroes (sponsored by organized crime). Of course, nobody ever bothered to tell them that.

[edgar-allan-possum]

“To protect the world from devastation…”

[atopfourthwall]

Plus, as is frequently pointed out: Jesse and James are good at every other job EXCEPT Team Rocket. They’re actually smart businesspeople and run successful food and merchandise stands and are great salespeople. Hell, even in Team Rocket situations where they’re not chasing after Pikachu they’ve done better. It’s just their Achilles Heel is one damn OP rodent.

[computationalcalculator]

Pikachu Proximity Intelligence Chart

[hyperdragon97]

I thought this post couldn’t get better

I WAS SO WRONG

[ryebreadgf]

munchausen syndrome is what hansel and gretel had

[ryebreadgf]

[lizardsister]

hang on i gotta google some things

[lizardsister]

yeah this is funny

[bloodybrahms]

the new halloween movie looks great

[lemonteaflower-deactivated20260]

[anniedraws-deactivated20161204]

lemonteaflower:

You know you did great when they don’t need you anymore…  

SOB

[betpisbroken-deactivated2014041]

[altemo3]

we were so close to this ending on a good note… why…

[lemonteaflower-deactivated20260]

this fucking post popped up in my dash again i swear it haunts me since the day i posted it why must it come back why must it always have that last pic attached why did this happen i did not sign for this.

[mysharona1987]

Newsflash: It's not babysitting if it's your own kids!

[thefuzzydave]

[drinkyourjuiceshelby]

[stupidbeecandle]

I lived and worked in a lighthouse at a previous job.  There was a thick line painted in a circle around the shack where the fog signal was kept.  The line represented how close you could get to the fog signal without experiencing physical harm in the form of eardrums shattering or worse.

Even in the house it was LOUD.  Probably the loudest thing I have ever experienced but at a normal, predictable interval.  You would begin to time your sentences with little pauses with the rest of the lighthouse crew so you would talk like this while making your………..HORN…………. tea and then carry on talking because you knew when it would go off.  It rattled the walls and the dishes in our cabinet.

At least one girl had died there. They kept photos of her everywhere “in honor of her sacrifice” because she had decided to take the winter watch alone and died in a storm where bounders the size of mini vans had been lifted out of the ocean and left scattered across the island, to say nothing of the ice chunks.  People weren’t allowed to be alone on the watch after that.

One day a dead moose washed up on shore and it took my entire crew all day but we managed to rig up a line to hang it up to dry because we thought having a moose skeleton in the house would really spice the living room up a bit.  It did.  Weird shit happens when six of you are left alone, like ALONE ALONE, no cell reception, no wifi, just a radio to contact the real world and not a lot of reason to do that.  People don’t go on lighthouse jobs if they want to stay connected, I’ve found.

That said Id do it all again, I really do treasure those days

[glowingghosty]

[mcnerds]

you know you could’ve just said “no they don’t have wifi” and that would’ve answered the question

[stupidbeecandle]

But then you wouldnt have known about the moose

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[eo92e]

[marisatomay]

i hope your onions caramelize. i hope my onions caramelize. i hope we both sauté our root vegetables to perfection. slow cooked onions in loving pan.

[seongpinkhwa]

this is still my favourite tweet of all time

[insomniac-arrest]

sick of pathologizing our favorite characters. “This one has anxiety, this one has ADHD”

we need to expand our diagnosis. Mario has acid reflux. that guy from Supernatural has herpes. Wonder Woman has a UTI. we have the power here

[wizardlyghost]

hey not to supernatural gif in 2021 but uh

[insomniac-arrest]

goddammit 

[jerks-deactivated20200603]

[gayagendaofficial]

[ryanhatesthis]

Well, that’s enough internet for me today.

[testosterowned]

this post teleported me back to 2011

[judgejudyofficial]

times were simpler and red comic sans abundant

[firesuns-archive]

[giadadilaurentis]

world heritage post

[sparrow-va]

my legacy lives on

[mamoru]

I had a dream that unless the teacher told us class was over, we were forbidden from going out the door. Our teacher was very forgetful, and maybe even malicious. After being forced to stay past sunset many days, my class decided we were going to break out every night. Eventually our attempts led us to discovering rifts in space-time where we could warp. So we never used the door. Checkmate.

[turbro]

the window

[mamoru]

what? you going to critique my dreams? my subconscious creations, that I did by accident, while asleep? the chemicals in my brain? are you going to use your foul eyes and dissect all of the plotholes in my dreams? you going to critique the weather? harass the clouds? make fun of thunder for being off key? remind me to come to your house and shred your shoes

[lovesjustachemical]

That response is fucking Shakespearean.

[inthefallofasparrow]

[marlynnofmany]

Note to self: memorize those last two lines in case I ever need to deliver a sick burn in verse.

[septembersung]

#you CRITIQUE miette? you edit her dreams like the essay? oh! shredded shoes for you! ( via @freenarnian )