Xuebing Du
Not today Justin
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Sweet Seals For You, Always
DEAR READER
YOU ARE THE REASON
Mike Driver
Love Begins
Janaina Medeiros
tannertan36
Three Goblin Art
Jules of Nature
Peter Solarz
trying on a metaphor
Monterey Bay Aquarium
noise dept.
$LAYYYTER
🪼
Stranger Things
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@drownininari
Sink Your Teeth Into Me- A BDSM Ghoap Fic
Sink Your Teeth Into Me is an explicit fic focused on Hardcore BDSM practices like cock & ball torture, semenawa, consensual-non-consensual play, and more. I will update the tags as more chapters come out to reflect the types of play shown in the fic.
I hope y’all enjoy!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
my biology professor has such a chaotic energy about him, last week i went to his office hours and somehow we ended up on the topic of gay marriage:
he said that when he lived in texas they changed the law to define marriage as “between a man and a woman in a house of religious worship with the intention to have children” so he filed his taxes as single and when they called him up like “you filed married last year” he was like “you changed the law, i was married by a judge in a courthouse and i have no intention of having kids” and they told him “you know who that law was for” and i guess he hung up on them and did not, in fact, pay taxes as a married man that year
Chaotic good
NO! This is Lawful Good! He is following the LAW! Chaotic doesn’t just mean cheeky!
this is like how Sweden stopped classifying homosexuality as an illness because people started a campaign of calling in gay to work
malicious compliance is one of the best tools in the arsenal of civil rights activism
Always reblog for malicious compliance
sometimes following the letter of the law works even better than ignoring it.
In Utah the new book banning laws apply to the bible, and there’s already someone petitioning to get it removed from schools and libraries.
I hope no English teacher ever puts up with “banning pronouns” for even a moment
Update: The Utah book ban has, in fact, resulted in the Bible being banned in elementary and middle schools in Davis County, and high schoolers now only have limited access to the King James Version, due to “vulgarity and violence.”
Now the Book of Mormon is under consideration for a ban as well. The parent who complained said that it was very violent.
the secret cheat code for women is realizing you dont have to date men
this doesnt just go for lesbians it goes for bi women and straight women too. i cant even count how many times straight women have told me “i wish i was a lesbian so i didnt have to date men” but guess what … u Dont have to date men
to be clear this also isnt necessarily saying ‘go date women instead!!’ its just saying…. u dont have to date men. u dont have to be dating women in order to not date men! in fact if ur not attracted to women at all please dont date women just as a substitute for men. but if dating men isnt making u happy… u dont have to do that. u dont have to make a space in ur life for men
im singlehandedly destroying every mans mental health by telling women its ok to not date them
Has anyone figured out what’s so viscerally wrong with this woman yet
She’s so one dimensionally evil you guys 😭😭 how is she real
read this and remember it. read this and remember that she is going to use the profits of her fucking ego-stroking reboot to decimate trans rights. read this and remember that every time you pay into her IP, you are emboldening her to hurt us more.
our lives matter more than your fucking nostalgia.
trans lives matter more than your fucking nostalgia.
jeremy: he was sixteen.
kevin: it's the age of consent in west virginia. without a complaint, there was no crime, and there will never be a complaint.
neil, who got the complaint:
Can someone please explain to me what evaporated milk is? Wouldn’t that just be gas by definition? I live in constant fear
no no it’s what left behind after the milk has been evaporated cuz only the water goes, not the other stuff
THERE’S WATER IN MILK?
WHAT DID YOU THINK THE LIQUID WAS?
IDK ISNT MILK ITS OWN LIQUID?
NO
IT’S MILK-STUFF MIXED WITH WATER
MILK STUFF? DOESNT IT JUST COME FROM THE COW’S TIT?
ITS LIKE TIT JUICE, THERE IS WATER IN JUICE AND THERE IS WATER IN MILK
It’s fat droplets suspended in water, with some nutrients and soforth dissolved in it. You know, like ranch dressing.
Evaporated milk is just dehydrated milk.
Obsessed with the user who assumed milk was its own element on the periodic table
As op I felt like I had to make this
Milk, the forbidden 119th element
the only question left is if it’s a metal, non-metal, or metalloid.
OP seems to have classified it as a special case of halfnium, reclassified as a lanthanide. This has fascinating implications for electron orbital geometry.
Anyway it’s a rare earth metal apparently.
Yes I definitely classified it intentionally and knew exactly what I was doing when I put it with the lanthanides because I am never wrong
MILK IS A RARE EARTH METAL
I thought so, I took one look at your classification and immediately thought “this is definitely someone with a deep understanding of how the periodic table works”
I’m glad that we have reached a consensus on the expected elemental properties of milk
I’d really like to know what @derinthescarletpescatarian’s thoughts are on milk’s electron orbital geometry
That would involve writing a crash course in how suborbitals work on a post about whether water (the primary ingredient in milk) is in milk and even for tumblr that’s going a bit far
no, it is absolutely not going too far
You guys always complain that you don’t get to learn stuff in normal ways and then you come asking for this
MILK IS SEVERAL COMPOUNDS PLEASE YALL ARE KILLING ME OVER HERE
We have a container of dry milk because in addition to a little fat and sugars, it contains proteins, which settle into the pores of nitrocellulose membranes, making sure analytical proteins (specific antibodies) don’t get trapped. We could just use casein (one of the proteins in milk), but milk is much cheaper and can also be found at Walmart.
No milk is a lanthanide keep up
lanthanide?
I think you mean lactanide
I will put lego in all of your shoes
A cube of milk with 3 inches of edge length can blow up the galaxy.
Our galaxy is actually the result of such an explosion, that’s why we call it the Milky Way
this is a unique sort of thread in which you’ll find two types of people exclusively: nerds and dumbasses
Enter OCEAN EYES and NOT DEAD YET, two of the king’s most quarrelsome stablehands.
OCEAN May one explain what powdered milk doth be? Is it not gas? I live in constant fear.
NOT DEAD The water flees to air, the rest is left. The dry debris then forms the powdered milk.
OCEAN Thou sayest water doth reside in milk?
NOT DEAD Pray tell what thou believ’st the liquid is?
OCEAN Is milk not one pure substance in itself?
NOT DEAD No; ‘tis only milk-stuff mixed with water.
OCEAN Yet milk appears from living cows’ own tits!
NOT DEAD ‘Tis juice from tits, yet water still it holds. If water be in juice, then ‘tis in milk.
Enter DERIN, the scarlet pescatarian.
DERIN ‘Tis drops of fat afloat in water, As if ‘twas dressing for thy greens. With water gone, the powdered milk remains.
A NOTE attached to an arrow, written by BURNING BRAND, flies through the window.
BURNING BRAND’S NOTE Obsessed with he who foolishly believ’d That milk is element of chemistry.
The NOTE crumbles to ash. BURNING BRAND is not seen again.
OCEAN As he who instigated such a fight, I felt that this creation was my duty.
OCEAN unrolls a scroll of parchment with a flourish.
OCEAN Behold, ‘tis milk, one hundred and nineteen.
Enter JASON FUNDER BERKER, a frog.
JASON FUNDER BERKER And yet the burning question still remains: ‘Tis metal, not, or somewhere in between?
JASON FUNDER BERKER does not wait to hear the answer, and exits.
DERIN A lanthinide! A special case, I see. How fascinating, geometrically. But let us leave atomic musings be. For milk is a rare metal of our Earth.
OCEAN Of course it is, for I am always right. My choices are, of course, deliberate.
DERIN I do not doubt thou speakest truth, my lord Thy brilliant mind is utterly unmatch’d. It seems that an agreement has been reach’d.
OCEAN Of course; however, in sincerity I wish to know thy scholar-driven thoughts.
DERIN I fear ‘twould be beyond thy comprehension. To teach to thee would take this much too far.
Exit OCEAN, in a huff. Enter JESIN, BOOP BOOP, FLIPOCRITE, VELVET, and LOVELY DREAMS, curious onlookers attracted to the scene.
JESIN Do teach us, it would not take this too far!
DERIN Ye all complain of learning strangely, Then ask me baiting questions such as this!
BOOP BOOP Thy gross ineptitude shall be my death! Milk is formed of small component parts. The fat, the sugars, proteins all combine They seep through pores of membranes in this drink Unpleasant compounds all are filter’d out. All this obtained for small amounts of coin.
DERIN No, milk is lanthanide, pray keep the pace.
FLIPOCRITE The word thou mean’st is lactanide, I think.
DERIN May sharpened pain-shaped stones fill up thy shoes So that thou never know’st a moment’s peace.
VELVET A cube of milk, three inches on each side Could blow up the entire galaxy.
DERIN Our galaxy was formed in such a fashion. ‘Tis why we gave it name of “Milky Way.”
LOVELY DREAMS Thus ends our entertainment for the night Here fools and pompous scholars come to fight.
Exuent, pursued by a cow.
(Shakespearean adaptation format inspired by @mortimermcmirestinks in this post)
Youpeople have no right to be this funny on my dash so early in the morning
This is one of those threads that would go perfectly as a video set to “in the hall of the mountain king” and we all know it, I’m just not gonna be the one to make it
At least no one went off on the fact that powdered milk and evaporated milk aren’t the same thing. :)
not interested in getting involved in the rest of this discussion, for the most part, but to me this is a GREAT piece of advice that many people these days don't seem to be getting or understanding.
not everyone you meet or interact with is your friend, the requirements and expectations for respectful behaviour between friends is not the same as between strangers.
y’all have got to stop recommending aftg to heated rivalry enjoyers unprompted 😭 this is like recommending cocaine to someone who has eaten a pot brownie once
i had to rip some of these out of the tags, I'm fucking dying
everyone having a very normal time over at Queen City Deli
Queen City Deli bringing the heat into 2022 with a new sign
It’s 2025 and we’re still so normal ♥️🪞
Never kill yourself, new wet beef drop
Official silly sign(s)
spiders ?
That lip movement, soft mouth puppets are so wonderful.
“frogs like this, dont eatthatsortathing, you see they-like-uh, flies,. worrmms,,”
“flies.., -worms?”
“spiders, !”
“spiders ?“
“yes, spi-”
hc Neil actually chooses to go vegan/vegetarian and people who dont know him think he’s a Pretentious Diet Restriction person and mockingly ask if its to save animals or an athlete thing.
cut to them looking traumatized for life after Neil explains in explicit details all the way he has seen his father open, dissect and dismember people, off handedly mentioning he’s been forced to eat human meat before so yeah it sorta ruined all meats for me
All gays will go to hellsite
What if in hellsite but not gay
NO!
String identified: A ga g t t at t t t ga T tag g a Ag agag Acctac ! T tag g a Ag agag Acctac
Closest match: Psylliodes chrysocephala genome assembly, chromosome: 4 Common name: Cabbage Stem Flea Beetle
(image source)
Ye knowe eek, that in forme of speche is chaunge With-inne a thousand yeer, and wordes tho That hadden prys, now wonder nyce and straunge Us thinketh hem; and yet they spake hem so, And spedde as wel in love as men now do.
chaucer, Troilus and Criseyde c. 1380
glossary: eek also and even tho at the time prys great value wonder a cause for astonishment nyce stupid spedde succeeded
You know the form of language, too, can change. Within a thousand years, even the words that were most precious then, seem strange and foolish to us; yet they spoke them so and did no worse in love than we now do.
I have the mental image of Kevin being interviewed and hearing the most vile, most despicable and cruel comment about his team.
And he could say something about it but Kevin decides that no no I’m going to express my displeasure by doing something even worse.
So Kevin slowly turns to where Neil is standing off side beside Andrew, takes a few steps back and gestures for him to go.
“You have 5 minutes.”
The smile on Neil’s face tells the interviewer they have seriously messed up but there’s no one to save them now.
kevin’s brain: deploy the red head
crazy to me some people dont appreciate the renee-andrew friendship. their conversations are so funny, that alone should sell you on it. this is what they sound like to me:
Andrew: their lives are gonna go up in flames and im gonna sit there watching and tanning
Renee: can you tan from fire?
Andrew: for sure
Renee: do you think people tanned at the salem witch trials?
*cue the twenty minute history discussion Kevin is overhearing and trying to act cool about bc if he shows interest Andrew will shut the topic down out of spite*
