Allergic to Cattails

Ask me to write a sentence, I'll write you a novel. One with relatively few periods and far too many commas.

[miraclemaya]

pjack is resurrected on the third day of pride. consider that.

[pjackk]

Dont be very woried about me since i deserve all of this

[artemisrhodon-deactivated202403]

staff member getting dunked on by one of their favorite bands you love to see it

[mothcrumbs]

[alldragonsaregood]

[byjove]

could you imagine if it happened this pride month

[natalieironside]

This is actually imitation synthetic beeswax but it was still made by bees. You ought to see them in their tiny little laboratory.

[jerreeeeeee]

not every mutual fits neatly into an archetypal medievalism but there are some mutuals that im like yeah addressing you as “my liege” would come strangely naturally

[jerreeeeeee]

what mutual is prev

my liege lord

my loyal knight

my wise wizard

my evil advisor

my brother in arms

my lady muse

my wild mermaid friend

my fellow alchemist

my dashing rapscallion

my monstrous foe

Remaining time: 2 days 20 hours

[papasmoke]

I just want you all to know i am planning to drive across the country to steal this street sign and hang it over my toilet

[zitongzi]

Dont announced your crimes over unsecured channels dumbass

[papasmoke]

I've spent the past month cooped up in a motel in Orange County planning my theft, before I steal the sign I will set off a cache of fireworks I've placed 5 blocks away from the nearest police station which will rain down on the pigs, the perfect diversion.

[acidwashwerewolf]

it's finally here! a full pdf download of IRONSCROTE is officially available for only $5! patrons get it automatically along with all of my other comics on there, or you can purchase it as a one-off!

it's diy bottom surgery! it's t-cock and ball torture! it's transgressive transsexual transhumanism!

[frenchifries]

the critical thing to understand about sora kingdomhearts is that when he was 14 a duck told him he wasn't allowed to express sadness and he has taken that 100% to heart every day for the rest of his life

[rpfofficial]

levels of mutualship :

the closest thing to real soulmates you can find

we fought in the same trenches and have a warrior's bond that carries over into every stage of life

friend i sit next to in every class and pass notes to/whisper to constantly

academic peer/colleague that i respect and have a little intellectual crush on

neighbour in the same apartment block that i say hi to on the stairs

neighbour across the street who i wave at every morning and evening

we're regulars at the same bar

i can't even remember who you are but if you weren't here there would be something fundamental missing

[canid-sys]

which mutual is prev?

the closest thing to real soulmates you can find

we fought in the same trenches and have a warrior’s bond

friend i sit next to in every class and pass notes to constantly

my little intellectual crush

neighbor in the same apartment blog that i say hi to on the stairs

neighbor across the street who i wave to every morning and evening

we’re regulars at the same bar

i can’t even remember who you are but you’re fundamentally important

nuance/prev is bald/tags

Voting ended onMay 30

i polled it 👍

[starfoozle]

Colleague A at the queer scientist mixer: “….so before I knew I was a lesbian, I was always into bishounen. It’s part of the process —”

Colleague B: “….what’s a bishounen?”

Greek chorus of other queer scientists who are all 30 or 40 years old: [simultaneously jump in to offer assorted definitions of androgynous prettyboy anime guys, at increasing volume]

Colleague B, hopefully, after a lengthy and considerate pause: “…oh, like Hisoka? From HunterXHunter?”

Greek chorus of other queer scientists who are all 30 or 40 years old: “UH….. NOT QUITE,,,”

[ransomnote]

every fleetwood mac documentary i've ever watched is like "the band was at the height of their success, enjoying the fame rolling in from their #1 hit 'i know about the other woman, lindsey'. however, nobody could have sensed the tension brewing between members."

[ransomnote]

"the group initially disbanded immediately after the release of the single 'well get the fuck out if you're going to be like that', leaving thousands of fans shocked."

[hopeless-eccentric]

humiliating to be attracted to a conventionally attractive person. I thought I was a more sensitive and refined pervert than this

[andewitt]

night creature

[muttsandmustelidae]

haha yeah man female dogs are bitchy and female horses are bitchy and female cats are bitchy and female ferrets are bitchy and female rats are bitchy and female guinea pigs are bitchy and female birds are bitchy and female rabbits are bitchy and female everything is bitchy. lol! isn’t it so funny how you think that! isn’t it so silly that this is your perception of literally every species! haha! i’m sure there’s nothing to unpack there! i’m sure you’re 100% accurate and unbiased in your conclusion that female animals are just inherently evil! i’m sure you have very normal thoughts about human women too! teehee! isn’t everyone laughing! isn’t it so goofy!

[pollsforadults]

You get transported into the universe of the last media you consumed. How are you doing?

This is better than my real life

I'm doing well

I'm doing fine

I'm not having a good time

I'm absolutely cooked

There is nothing different about this universe and my own

Voting ended onMay 29