Lost words

(Pinned post for side blogs and more interesting stuff!!) 30+ y/o nonbinary, queer. Disabled {ME/CFS}, AuDHDer, Mentally ill, I cannot work but I love learning. Remaking, recovering and caring of myself. Looking for my path and my own voice. . I love All For The Game so much!!!

[elipersonalstory]

Hello everyone!

My name is Eli or Aleth, I use Eli-Aleth on many of my social media!

I am a nonbinary person (she/they/whatever pronouns are fine), I am in my 30's and I am very weird lmao. I am also disabled and quiite sick, dealing with ME/CFS, GERD, IBS and probably more stuff.

I cannot work but I am learning, trying new things and who knows, maybe one day I will have my own little business or something.

Also I have lots of trauma and CPTSD, my anxiety and OCD are horrible and I don't remember not being anxious ever lmao, but I am learning more and more to take care of myself, and I am surrounded by fantastic people atm! So there's hope, I promise!!

I am an AuDHD person!!!

I am anarchist, I agree with some communist ideas, I try to learn to be a better anti-racist everyday but I am white person. Anticapitalist to the core. I am not an activist though, I am learning!!

I'm also a witch and a pagan! (may do a future side-blog maybee)

English is my third language!!! And I am still learning, please be patient!

I don't have a DNI or stuff like that, just know that bigots and fascists are NOT safe here. Fuck off. This includes TERFs, Racist, Ableist, Transphobes, Queerphobes, Homophobes, Fatphobic people, Anti-semitic people and more (sadly). Pro-Palestine forever!!!! FREE GAZA!!!

I love to read, to play videogames, to watch series and movies. I am on the All For The Game fandom because I've mostly read all the books in a couple months and I just... truly love them. Brainrotted 100%.

For now I have 3 blogs:

This one @elipersonalstory where I post a bit of everything that I find interesting, funny or worth to think about!

I have @eli-cuteness where I reblog cute stuff that I find online, because when I watch that feed, it gives me comfort.

And the last addition is @aleth-all-for-the-game because of my newest fandom!!

I may add more if I think an special interest/hobby/whatever requires it!! A writing blog maybe comming soon-ish (hello writeblr!!).

For other socials I have bluesky and a little youtube channel where I am learning video editing with Cooking Simulator lmao.

Now a long list of my favorite stuff for anyone interested:

My favorite musician is Halsey. But I do listen all kinds of music, I have a little preference for soundtrack music and lofi.

My favorite movies are The Lord of The Rings (the Hobbt ones too, I just like them a little less), Interstellar, The Batman Nolan trilogy, The Hunger Games, Amelie, Spirited Away, Green Book, Cabaret, The Notebook... and the list goes on lol.

My favorite books are AFTG, LOTR of course, The Hunger Games (all of the books), Millennium (the original Stieg Larsson trilogy), anything by Federico Garcia Lorca (i liek crying lmao), classic dystopias (1984, Animal Farm, Brave New world, Farenheit 451)... and waaaay more.

My favorite videogames are Stardew Valley, Undertale, Subnautica (the Below Zero too but less), the Sims (except the 4th), Cooking Simulator (not proudly, but I do play it a lot lmao), Minecraft, I've been playing a lot Medieval dynasty lately, the horror saga of Amnesia and also Soma (love it!!!), retro and weird indie games and lots of Nintendo games, and probably way more lol.

And that's all!! I will probably update this post in the future!

[i-suggest-aro]

imagine if people actually took romantic consent seriously. wouldn't it be fucking awesome. i know they never will, but just. take a moment and imagine it with me

[i-suggest-aro]

no more "just give them a chance, maybe you'll end up liking them!", no more "if you're going to reject someone, at least apologize to them!", no more shaming people for breaking up/divorcing, no more demonizing people for rejecting other peoples' romantic advances, no more shoving romance in romance repulsed peoples' face on purpose to provoke us, no more "i know we agreed to just be friends with benefits, but i thought you were going to fall in love with me eventually!", no more "i can fix them" when the only thing "wrong" with them is that they want to fuck without dating.

wouldn't it be nice?

[sorcererclow]

A friend I used to hang out with every week once confessed his feelings for me, which I didn't reciprocate. I wanted to stay friends, didn't see why we couldn't, we had been friends the whole time without any romance, why did that have to change? but he decided to stop hanging out with me.

I was heartbroken and felt tossed aside. I didn't understand why our friendship wasn't worth anything to him if he couldn't have me romantically or sexually. I felt betrayed and dehumanised, like I didn't matter to him as a person but only as a romantic prospect.

When I told other friends about it, to my surprise they all sided with him. "He is heartbroken, it's hard to get rejected" even my THERAPIST said this. It's not like I didn't empathize with him, but wasn't I rejected too? No one else could see that but me, they placed me as some sort of villain that had power over him in that situation, when all I did was set a boundary between friendship and romance. All I did was not consent to the terms he wanted for our relationship, I rejected them, my terms were different and he rejected those.

I've had my heart broken by friends over and over and it hurt the same, if not more, than any romantic heartbreak. Why is friendship undervalued next to romantic feelings?

To be honest, to this day I'm still pissed that no one sided with me on this. There's so much unraveling that needs to get done around how we view different relationships in our lives, and I feel like most people can't even scratch the surface when it comes to this questioning.

[bitchesgetriches]

Execs Confused and Horrified by the Huge AI Bills After Thinking They Could Replace Workers for Free

"Many organizations are still building the capabilities required to forecast, monitor, and manage AI spending effectively."

[traycakes]

One of the funniest quotes early on in the AI bubble was an executive saying he was replacing workers with AI because "AI will never demand higher wages or else they'll go on strike" and it was so fucking clear that he hadn't thought through how anything worked, because of course the AI companies can raise their rates and if you don't pay then they don't let you use their software.

[angryraptor13]

Isn't this straight out of Walmart's playbook? Lure customers (businesses with human employees) over with low prices and put all competitors (human employees) out of business (employment), then they're free to charge whatever they want for their shitty products (lying electricity-hogging chatbots that cannot actually do a human's job).

[mikkeneko]

I've known for decades that capitalism is bad for workers and consumers, but only in the past few years have I come to increasingly realize that it's bad for businesses, too.

[sometimes-petty]

"On the same token, it's important not to lose sight of the fact that AI — or more accurately, the myth surrounding it — is currently being deployed across the world as a tool to discipline labor, to force workers into a weaker position when it comes to wage negotiations, benefits, and overall stability."

There it is

[wiisagi-maiingan]

Something that is deeply frustrating to me is how often ace and aro terms and experiences are ignored and degraded as a "tumblr thing" that no one else cares about. First of all, even if itnwas just on tumblr, real people are on this site and sharing their real feelings and experiences. You don't need to publish your thoughts in a book or go to college to understand and express your life experiences and identity.

But second, these things ARE talked about off of tumblr! There are published books and academic articles, there are irl communities, there aspec people doing interviews, all of that. Amatonormativity as a term is credited to a book published in 2012. Mainstream news sites have been talking about aspec terms like queerplatonic for over a decade.

Aspec teens on tumblr are valuable and important parts of our community who deserve voices, and they're also not all that we are. There are aspec people everywhere living our lives and using our terms regardless of what aphobes and "reformed" ace discoursers have to say about it on social media.

[wiisagi-maiingan]

I feel like everyone just happily moved past acecourse and are now pretending like it never happened but it did so much fucking damage to perceptions of aspec people. And the acecourse bloggers who spent months if not years spamming tags with gore, telling children and teens that they deserved to be raped for being ace, making ~ace Ronald Reagan~ moodboards, calling aro people heartless monsters and abusers, etc have now rebranded and "moved past" the discourse but are still being openly aphobic while also relentlessly attacking other queer groups.

It seems like we're only just now starting to talk about aspec stuff again and I can't help but feel like the resistance to terms like amatonormativity and queerplatonic has a lot to do with the relentless mockery and harassment of aspec people that was so normalized online for so long.

[ftmtftm]

It is a beautiful day to not be cis, to not exist as someone who could or would ever pass for cis, to never want to be cis, and to never desire to replicate cis gender presentation ever.

[ftmtftm]

"One problem is that many people who refuse to allow trans people to define themselves, is that they feel that their own self-definition is destabilized. The idea that we can change reality, transform reality, to be more open, inclusive, just, less violent, there's an instability in that that's very frightening to people who want to understand their genders as fixed but is anybody's gender necessary and universal? Or is it a complicated emergence that happens with each of us? Our deepest sense of self is also formed in time and we can't always know in advance what that will be."

— Judith Butler [ Berkley professor explains gender theory | Judith Butler ]

[ftmtftm]

This is not necessarily how Butler intended it, but I would go so far as to say this statement includes other trans people — especially other binary trans people.

The whole reason why we have transmedicalists is because the idea of trans people who don't want hormones or surgery, trans people with neogenders and neopronouns, nonbinary trans people who don't fit into the "third gender" androgynous/genderless gender trinary, etc. disrupt and destabilize the very things binary trans people find very validating about their own genders.

The idea that gender isn't static or binary and is instead impacted by multiple different variables and can be different for everyone completely destabilizes the institutions of medical gender transition and the validation that comes with it for many binary trans people. It's scary. I genuinely empathize with that fear, I felt it once too.

But it's an unfounded fear. We don't need to dissect every single part of our psyches and physiology to validate our transitions or lack there of. We just need to work towards a future where people can simply live in whatever way makes them happiest with themselves.

[ftmtftm]

If your main social time with other queer people on the internet is engaging with discourse you need to find an additional hobby.

Your hobby should not be spending your waking hours on Tumblr emotionally self harming by reading posts from ignorant people who are just echoing the bigotry you're experiencing in real life. Your passion and emotion are very real, but if it is hurting you, stressing you out, making you angry in ways that linger, etc. — you need to transition into doing something else for awhile.

If you feel compelled to engage with discourse but are stressed online, find a book to read and take some time to annotate it and write notes about it. If you want to be online and engaged with other people, look for a community surrounding a hobby you partake in like crochet or D&D or writing etc. — not necessarily a community centered around a piece of media, but centered around something you do.

I literally say this as someone who has a hobby and special interest in queer theory and also struggles with that line sometimes because I'm also depressed and autistic and hyper fixate etc. etc. — Do yourself a favor, take a break, and do something else with other people. Like, don't get it twisted, these are reminders for myself too. Do something else.

If you are so stressed out and upset and attached to discourse that it is impacting your emotional state negatively in a consistent manner, check in with yourself because intentionally engaging with something that is that consistently distressing is often a form of emotional self harm. Be kinder to yourself.

[ijustwannafallunderyrsawteeth]

i really appreciate adam mckay's willingness to discuss the elephant in the room this summer and summers into the future...

The Gargantuan Lie That is Collapsing The World’s Climate

Thinking we have time left to address climate change, or that “Net Zero by 2050” will save us, is driving us toward full social collapse in

However, there is one type of rare, gargantuan, towering lie that makes all the other mass lies throughout human history seem like frightened, scurrying, little adorable fibs.

It is a lie told worldwide by hundreds of thousands of institutions, elected officials, many universities, legacy news, some large non-profits and eventually—as the deception entered mainstream culture—even by ourselves, to ourselves, every single moment of every day. It is a constantly growing gourd that even as a baby back in the 1970s was the size of three aircraft carriers. These days it is so massive it is almost easier to refer to what isn’t part of it (Disneyland, a BLT, that green croc by the side of the highway) than what is.

This massive lie can best be summed up as “when it comes to climate change... we have more time.”

...

"No, the monstrous, misshapen garden colossus lie we’re referring to is subscribed to by most of the U.S., has stopped and slowed climate action far more than outright denial, and keeps growing and growing. Every day this deception whispers seductively in the ears of mankind: “global warming is real but not urgent… Keep doing what you’re doing.”

Less embarrassing than “climate change is a Chinese hoax,” but every bit as unscientific and ridiculous, it is the preferred lie of the ruling class, mainstream news media, and corporations.

Sir David King—former science advisor to the United Kingdom, professor at Oxford and then Cambridge, winner of too many awards to list and as establishment as they come—was quoted as saying that what we do over the next three to four years will determine the fate of humankind.

He said this... in 2021.

Like all grand lies, “we have more time” takes many different forms, often focus-grouped. There are the lofty-sounding promises to reach “Net-zero emissions by 2050,” as if 24 years from now was soon enough. There are the queries of “What’s your carbon footprint?,” as if individual people with plastic bags or straws were the problem and not gigantic multinational corporations. There’s the accusation that anyone who expresses urgency is a “doomer.” There are those who treat climate as an abstraction to win political campaigns, first arguing that the Biden administration’s Inflation Reduction Act was a victory despite doing nowhere near enough to address the scale of climate collapse, and more recently that Democrats should just stop talking about climate and focus on more “winnable” issues. Most damaging and common of all, there are those who simply don’t mention it.

All of these distortions have robbed us of the most critical element people need to understand a threat and adjust their actions accordingly: context.

And make no mistake, when it comes to how much time we have, the data and the geological record are crystal clear.

For some badly-needed context, the last three years, likely for the first time in over 100,000 years, have averaged above the Paris Accords’ “do not cross” 1.5 degrees celsius planetary warming. Only ten years ago, that was considered catastrophic, but now mainstream news tells us it’s just a number.

And with a bump coming next year from a growing, historic El Niño up to 1.7 degrees celsius average warming, likely to cause agricultural failure and food shortages, we are staring right at the vaunted 2C number.

Why is 2C so vaunted?

Let’s do the context thing again: 2C will mean we have completely left the stable climate period known as the Holocene. This is the 11,000-year-old era that has given us large-scale crop and livestock agriculture, which gave us cities, written language, modern science and medicine, and warm beds and showers."

[ijustwannafallunderyrsawteeth]

[orangepenguino]

x

[traycakes]

Anthropic Explains Its Watermark System as Some Claude Users Loudly Revolt

“The difference between watermarked and un-watermarked text will not be distinguishable to readers,” Anthropic says.

The watermark will not affect the (low) quality of generated text and will not be obvious to the reader, it just will allow for incredibly accurate AI detection (probably still some false positives).

The fact that so many people are cancelling the subscription over this proves they don't view it as a tool to help them, but as something they can exploit by taking credit for work it did. It's a way to create misinformation and stolen valor.

They all know using AI is fucked up and pretending you "made" something by typing a prompt is a farce. The ability to fool other people is a crucial part of the product.

[guccifloralsuits]

If THE modern translator of the OG Odyssey text wrote this about my film adaptation I’d kill myself

Emily Wilson you’re goated

[wiisagi-maiingan]

Wild to leave a bad review for a drop shipper on Etsy and have them message me to take it down?? Sorry, maybe if you don't want people to think you're just buying your shit from drop shipping third party sellers on Amazon, don't use the exact same photos as the Amazon listing and don't ship it to the buyers directly from Amazon so that it arrives in a prime package?? Trying to support actual small businesses is getting really fucking hard these days.

[wiisagi-maiingan]

"Your bad review is hurting my small business 😢" Uh, no. Dishonesty and drop shipping and selling shit for twice the price is available for elsewhere is what's gonna hurt your "small business."

[wiisagi-maiingan]

Lmao??? I don't even know how to respond to this so I just won't.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Listen guys witch hunts were bad but they weren’t a universal phenomenon in the past. Western Europeans and colonists just had a collective freak out for about a hundred years around the 17th and 18th centuries and then they mostly calmed down.

At the time Eastern Europe was also freaking out about vampires. Everybody was just having a rough century.

[depsidase]

[bebsi-cola]

money is such an underrated accessibility option.

like people want to think any disabled person who is after money is morally suspect some way, because they're not asking for "treatments" or "accommodations" like a lot of our issues can be fixed way more easily with money. can't drive? paying for a taxi is often one of the more accessible alternatives. can't cook? you can pay more to have prepared food delivered to you. food restrictions? that food straight up costs more money. can't clean? you can pay for someone to do that. house inaccessible? having (lots) of money can help with that, you get the gist.

having money won't make us abled. it also won't stop our symptoms from being distressing, painful, or debilitating. but there's a huge gap in experience between the average poor disabled person and someone who's actually wealthy. you can buy your way out of some of the difficult situations most disabled people are left to rot in. wanting money, needing money, asking for money is pretty natural when it's such a useful tool. why get so weird about disabled people wanting money like i'm pretty sure everyone wants money anyway

[asynca]

Anyway, I say this as a 2-decade-long House, MD fan: FUCK HUGH LAURIE.

He also voiced Dumbledore in the 2025 Harry Potter audiobook. Receiving pay to harm trans people so like, yeah

fuck him. off the fucking christmas list. I won't be streaming anything he's done again.

[bonerfart]

How to spot a ‘fake’ gamer

Frequently pronounces video games as “Blideo Bames”

Will often say “I need help passing this level it’s really hard” then when you look at their screen it’s running Microsoft Excel 2007

They invite you over to their place to check out their game collection and it’s just every season of Frasier (still impressive)

Their Xbox One is actually a series of tissue boxes glued together with the word “NINTEMDO” painted over it

When you ask their favourite video game they respond by doing a series of skillful backflips, temporarily distracting you from having asked the question in the first place

Keeps a secret diary with “I HATE VIDEO GAMES AND I NEVER PLAY THEM” written on every page