
oozey mess

if i look back, i am lost
almost home

★

ellievsbear
Sweet Seals For You, Always
RMH
One Nice Bug Per Day

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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
noise dept.
Monterey Bay Aquarium
sheepfilms
Misplaced Lens Cap
AnasAbdin
$LAYYYTER

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

pixel skylines

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seen from United States
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seen from Namibia

seen from Malaysia
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@flowerchildinthewild
Martin Luther when he began the Protestant reformation in Europe. (1517)
What in the world is this supposed to mean???
Am I the only one who doesn’t understand???
Is this Chip and Joanna??
My favorite thing is that Europe is spooky because it’s old and America is spooky because it’s big
“The difference between America and England is that Americans think 100 years is a long time, while the English think 100 miles is a long way.” –Earle Hitchner
A fave of mine was always the american tales where people freaked out because ‘someone died in this house’ and all the europeans would go ‘…Yes? That would be pretty much every house over 40 years old.’
‘…My school is older than your entire town.’
‘Sorry, you think *how far* is okay to travel for a shopping trip?’
*American looks up at the beams in a country pub* ‘Uh, this place has woodworm, isn’t that a bit unsafe?’ ‘Eh, the woodworm’s 400 years old, it’s holding those beams together.’
A few years ago when I was in college I did a summer program at Cambridge aimed specifically at Americans and Canadians, and my year it was all Americans and one Australian. We ended the program with a week in Wessex, and on the last day as we all piled onto the bus in Salisbury (or Bath? I can’t remember), the professors went to the front to warn us that we wouldn’t be making any stops unless absolutely necessary. We’re headed to Heathrow to drop off anyone flying off the same day, then back to Cambridge.
“All right, it’s going to be a long bus ride, so make sure you’re prepared for that.”
We all brace ourselves. A long bus ride? How long? We’re Americans; a long bus ride for us is a minimum of six hours with the double digits perfectly plausible. We can handle a twelve hour bus ride as long as we get a bathroom break.
The answer. “Two hours.”
Oh.
English people trying to travel around Australia and wildly underestimating distance are my favourite thing
a tour guide in France told my school group that a particular cathedral wouldn’t interest us much because “it’s not very old; only from the early 1600s”
to which we had to respond that it was still older than the oldest surviving European-style buildings in our country
China is both old and big. I had some Chinese colleagues over; we were discussing whether they wanted to see the Vasa ship (hugely expensive war ship which sank on it’s maiden voyage after 12 min). They asked if it was old, I said “not THAT old” (bearing in mind they were Chinese) “it’s from the 1500s.” To my surprise they still looked impressed, nodding enthusiatically. Then I realised I’d forgotten something: “…I mean it’s from the 1500s AFTER the birth of Christ” and they went “oh, AFTER…”.
My dad’s favorite quote from various tours in Italy was “Pay no attention to the tower – it was a [scornful tone] tenth century addition.”
My last boss was Chinese, and she said when her parents came to visit her from Beijing they pronounced Chicago “A very nice village.”
This post keeps getting better
One of the people who work with my father is Chinese. When my father said our country has 7 million people, his Chinese friend asked “in what village”.
* aggressively rips open pad wrapper on first day of period *
Marvel Cinematic Universe title cards as of April 27th, 2018
College band class pranks director with Mii Channel theme
I have been waiting all year to post this.
omg
This has been in my queue for months.
I missed it last year and I vowed that would NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
omg i didnt reblog this last year!
some more sleep + cuddling with the rest of the tlc ships ✨
Are you a total Hermione-Voldemort?
From now on I’ll use this to describe myself (in case I need to apply for a job or something)
Uuuuuummmmm
I’m a bit concerned…
I’m gonna bring this full circle by showing you that I got
not quite what I was expecting
YA fans are some of the most dedicated readers on the planet: they buy tons of books...and worship the couples that earn their adoration. Whether you’re writing a fairy tale retelling, fantasy, or contemporary, here are some strategies for writing a romance that’s truly one in a million.
Cool it with all the physical description.
Avoid the oh-so-quirky factor.
Make your characters imperfect.
Dial back the physical beauty.
NO instalove.
Cut out the tired phrasing.
Make it awkward.
Hold back on the “Happily Ever After”
i’ve been thinking a lot about mask stories, so i’ll tell you a few if you want.
1. the prince wears a mask. his magic is too bright, they say. his eyes burn like two suns and every inch of his skin radiates light. glance for a second too long and your eyes will hurt, blinking purple shadows of his silhouette wherever you look. he wears the mask for your protection. for everyone’s.
2. there are three monarchs and three thrones and three masks. they are:
the night queen in her silver moon mask, dressed in every shade of purple you have ever secretly coveted, her uncovered mouth smiling like she knows every secret in the world.
the day king in his blue topaz mask, his face rippling beneath the layers of gems as if drowned in the brightest, most deceiving ocean.
the unknowable one in their mask of twilight mist and sunrise fog, dressed in every forgotten daydream the color of diamond or wistfulness.
1. it is not just the prince’s face that is covered. his gloved hand is warm in yours. does he radiate heat as well as light?
people part like an ancient sea as he moves through the ballroom. the eye slots of his mask are covered in golden mesh impossible for you to see through, but he walks with uninhibited grace.
and you are next to him. and you have no mask to hide the raw honesty in your face the way he does. and they will look at you because they cannot look at him.
3. the princess wears a mask because each member of the royal family wears a mask. because they are not human — because they are unknowable — because that is just the way they are.
forgive me. this story splinters more than the others. i cannot tell you why they wear masks. i can only tell you that the princess wears one and you do not listen to those who mutter that you cannot trust the masked heirs to the throne, they could be hiding something, they could be someone other than who they are.
you don’t listen. the reason is the same in every story.
1. you can fall in love with the absence of a face.
2. you bow before the three thrones as every other suppliant does. three masks. three chances for forgiveness. you feel when the queen’s eyes land on you and suddenly there is hesitation in her smiling mouth.
“i beg forgiveness,” you say.
and the day king in his ocean-mask says, “for what do you ask forgiveness?”
3. when the princess is in trouble you feel it in your bones. your wrist snaps and your ribs contort with pain. everything in you is undone and reformed by the absence of her in your life and the presence of the army that sweeps the castle.
you should run away. you could run. you could be safe.
instead you run to the red-armored knight who slaughtered the princess’s parents on their thrones.
1. you love him though you have never seen a single inch of his skin. collar pulled up to the chin of his mask. hands gentle beneath gloves meeting sleeves at the wrist.
“do i know you?” you ask, because you have to.
“yes,” he promises, and his voice spills all the light his cloak and mask hide.
2. “i beg forgiveness because i saw your faces,” you say, and the gasps of three gods becoming mortal become three screams as arrows hit their hearts so fast it seems as if they grew there.
3. she is alive. she is alive and your ribs can clutch your heart and your fractured bones meet again with a pain that brings tears running down your face. arms tighter than iron hold you helpless on your knees but she is alive, framed in red armor as the invader holds a dagger blade to the exposed skin beneath her mask.
“shall we see what our beloved princess looks like? shall we see why our precious heirs hide their faces from the sun?”
she is so quiet you would almost think she’s smug.
4. when you were little your mother told you the sun was a mask the moon wore during the day, and as proof asked when you ever saw them both at the same time.
the first time you saw the ghost of the moon still lingering in the morning light while the sun rose across the sky you felt a bitterness take root beneath your heart and you put on a mask and you refused to answer when the stars called.
3. the mask lifts from her face and she is not the princess.
2. without their masks they were nothing more than handfuls of shadow and light that had been allowed to play at law and power. when you saw their faces you knew what they were and you knew it was time for their power to end.
3. you have seen her before. a laughing, dashing thing, a common sight around the glass-painted castle where guards comfort every doorway with their presence.
the scream of the red knight’s fury as he pushes her away shatters towers.
“are you angry?” she whispers as you pull her into your arms, feeling bones stretch and settle with the rightness of her near.
“i’m so happy i can have you,” you whisper. because a decoy princess is not a princess and you can kiss her shoulder, her hair, her mouth.
4. you have tried so many masks. silk, steel, defiance, gold. the one you like best is anger.
1. the night after the ball you lean against him on a terrace and watch the moon and stars dance overhead. it is so bright, and so dark. everything is silver and velvet and wanting.
you turn your head only halfway and reach up one hand, feel the edge of the heavy mask against your palm and push it up.
his eyes pool like two galaxies as he looks down at you in the darkness. your hand settles lightly on one cheekbone and you sweep your thumb softly across smooth skin.
he does not radiate light. there is no sun in the night.
my stories wears masks and hide from me.
1. beneath his mask there is nothing but ordinary skin.
this is amazing
Girl’s are amazing
I think we broke the notes…
i feel like i’m reblogging history. “the post that broke the notes”
THERE ARE NO FUCKING NOTES
WE HAVE REACHED INFINITY
what the heLL
Um….guys….
There are negative notes….
WHY ARE THERE NEGATIVE NOTES?
HOW ARE THERE NEGATIVE NOTES?!?!?!?!
Its in the black hole of tumblr
At time of reblogging, this post has 1 note :’)
Uhm nothing was there then I hit the heart and 1 note popped up.. Guys I’m scared..
it has reset to 0 notes. what have you done?
now it’s floating in the middle of the thingy
EVERY DAMN TIME
There’s literally nothing there.
What is this?
I couldn’t scroll past this. I need to be part of history for this. There are no notes do you even realise
Let it be known I was here on this day of march twentieth twenty sixteen and I’m laying in bed at nine thirty am
WOO NO NOTES PARTYYY
WTF IS THIS?!?! IM CONFUSED NO NOTES WUT DA ACTUAL FUCK
I LIKED IT AND IT HAD ONE NOTE.
ONE.
NOTE.
Oh wow there are seriously no notes..
What the heck.
OH MY GOSH IT’S TRUE. There were 0 notes, now i liked and just one note popped up! I’m.. I’m not sure how this can happen..? But now I’m part of history YEAH 24th March 2016 - 03:05 am
WHOA SO WEIRD
I just had to see it for myself and it’s true. Holy crap.
On this day, March 24th, 2016 at 12:22 in the afternoon, I have made myself part of history.
it’s back
I’ll probably always reblog this
I feel like tumblr staff have been motoring this post and they put a special code in it so no notes ever show up
This post is historic
you can never not reblog this when it comes on your dash tumblr rule
7/9/16 - 8:32 pm
Take your chance and be part of it. They’ll talk about this in their history books in future.
Literally no notes
I liked it one note pops up
What the everloving fuck
23/11/2017
5:44pm
Wtf.. there’s not even a message saying 0 notes xD
29/11/17
No notes
One note popped up
22/12/2017
07:46 AM
whoa
… there’s…. there’s no notes…. 😳
Why is everyone not paying attention to the lost camera guy with no notes
One note 1/8/18
YES PLEASE.
OK BUT HEAR ME OUT: SERENA FUCKING WILLIAMS.
make it happen pls
And I don’t want to hear nobody saying “oh but can she act”. She already is wonder woman, she don’t need to fucking act when she’s playing herself.
She’s wonder woman incarnate
Hell yeah I’m here for that
Ur fave hufflepunk
I would marry this man
guys we broke another post because this one’s not showing any notes
When I liked it, it flashed “0 notes”
It’s showing -1 notes
The camera man who broke Tumblr
There is no ‘Alien’ life in our galaxy. It has always be us Humans inhabiting different worlds spread so wide and so long that we forgot about each other. A human ship recently ’re-discovered’ Earth.