titsay
ojovivo
$LAYYYTER
Today's Document
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
sheepfilms
Product Placement
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todays bird
we're not kids anymore.
hello vonnie
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
Peter Solarz
NASA
will byers stan first human second
romaâ
Sweet Seals For You, Always
izzy's playlists!
Keni
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
seen from United States
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seen from Ireland
seen from United States
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@foulwombatdragon
this changed me as a person
Iâm in tears!
I just want to know how the writers of snl knew about my very specific sexual fantasy
âWhatâs your name?â âI never had oneâ DAAAAMN THEY WENT THERE
me, scrolling: is this the one with-
me, watching, vindicated: IT ISSSSS
you're laughing. one of the most prominent and very openly homophobic members of hungary's christian democratic party had to resign after he got caught by police while trying to flee from a quarantine-breaking "corona safe" 25 man gay orgy in brussels by trying to climb down the drainpipe butt ass naked with ecstasy in his backpack and you're laughing. and so am i bitch this is hysterical
say what?
I saw this news article! Hang on
https://www.newshub.co.nz/home/world/2020/12/anti-gay-hungarian-politician-j-zsef-sz-jer-resigns-after-being-caught-attending-25-man-orgy-in-breach-of-covid-19-rules.html
The party was broken up because it was violating COVID restrictions, incidentally, not because it was a gay orgy.
Yâall have no idea the incredible memes youâre missing out on because you donât speak Hungarian. The country is losing its collective shit in the best possible way. Itâs Drainpipe Total Landscaping over there. 10/10 pure gold.
PLS post some I beg of you
RĹŻĹže jsou rudĂŠ, maminka mi koupila hezkou maĹĄli,
KlĂnovec 28/11/2020
When my mom and aunt were younger my aunt was in high school and my mom in middle school. A group of girls were bullying my aunt and one slapped her in the lunch room. The principal met with my grandma and the other mom. He said they werenât punishing the other girl because he didnât get involved in âgirl problems.â My grandma asked if that meant my aunt could retaliate the next time it happened and he said no then it would be a fight and theyâd both get in trouble.
So my grandma turned away from him and to the other mom and said âI have another daughter. She doesnât go to this school and sheâs a star softball player with her own bat. You can tell your daughter to stop bothering mine or you can drive her to the hospital with a shattered jaw. Thatâs your choice.â And walked out.
Few months later that girl stole a necklace from my aunt. My grandma called the cops and they all drove to her house to get it back. The cop came outside with it and said he told the family my grandma wouldnât press charges if they gave it back. My grandma took the necklace and said âThen youâre going to have to go in and tell them you lied because I am pressing charges. Sheâs a thief and I want her treated like one.â
My grandma was a single mom in the 70s with two daughters and she took no shit from men who tried to undermine her and her daughters.
She also got excommunicated and then re-communicated after bothering the Vatican enough to let her back in
She doesnât even like being Catholic and is Episcopalian now. It was more of a âYou canât fire me, I quit!â which is even better, at least to me
op im begging you for more stories
Hey students, hereâs a pro tip: do not write an email to your prof while youâre seriously sick.
Signed, a person who somehow came up with âdear hello, I am sick and not sure if Iâll be alive to come tomorrow and Iâm sorry, best slutantions, [name]â.
I mean, if someone wrote that to me, Iâd probably believe they were sick.
âSlutantionsâ has me crying laughing
i once emailed my professor with a migraine. a mistake.
âI amsick will not to choir because i have a heache. i Hope its very and i am so sorry
love,
blueâ
the subject line was âOWâ
THE SUBJECT LINE IS THE BEST PART JSJFJSJDJS JUST IMAGINE GETTING AN EMAIL WITH NO CONTEXT OTHER THAN âOWâ
As someone who has taught college, please send those emails because 1) We WILL believe that; no one would write that on purpose and 2) we need a laugh sometimes.
On the other side of this, once after getting taken to the ER by ambulance, I got an email from the professor whose class Iâd passed out in, and the message had no text, just the subject line âyou good?â
Reblogging for the last addition
felix beingâŚ.felix đ¤
a lot of us are working from home now, pretty abruptly. itâs hard, and especially if youâre like me, a sudden lack of structure coupled with really harsh self-expectations/a tense or unforgiving temperament is really challenging.
i started working from home fulltime this year, and my stop it series is a set of doodled observations iâve made about the obstacles, bad habits, and unhealthy expectations iâve found myself running into as i adjust. i hope maybe they can be helpful to other people too!
please check out the linked tag bc i have further observations/clarifications on these in the captions of the individual posts, but i figured itâd be good to finally dump all the notes iâve made so far into one place.Â
and a final note on what iâve run into as i get used to working from home: it is a really really difficult balance for me, bc on one hand i really NEED a lot of self-discipline and productivity assists to get things done and make enough money to survive. but on the other hand, a loooooot of productivity advice/motivation/tools out there are really heavily keyed into capitalism and the concept of productivity as self-worth, and itâs easier than you think to slide into destructive thinking because youâre trying to keep yourself on track. do what you have to do, but make sure that the measures you take to try to make home employment work and get things done are always abt helping yourself do what you need to do without strife, not wringing as much work out of yourself as possible.
I hate that Trump is going to behave like the biggest manbaby of all time and this in no way will be held against male politicians. Hillary Clinton had to be smiling and calm and just give the best concession speech of all time because otherwise she blew it for all women. She showed people that women were too emotional, too bitchy for higher office. Even though she lost she still needed to lose with ALL THE GRACE possible because otherwise she made it more difficult for women in the future to run. And I hate that. I hate that double standard.
long blonde haired hyunjin
happy birthday @chengf âĄ
çĺ¨ äź čŻ´ Heaven Gaia
recently learned about a horticultural technique called Espalier, itâs the funniest goddamn thing iâve ever seen.
Espalier allows trees to be trained into 2-dimensions, by tying the branches to a flat surface as the tree grows. They literally flatten the tree. They make the tree flat. Flat tree!!!
Look at this. This is objectively hilarious:
And people get fancy about it. Look at this nonsense:
(the first oneâs called a Belgian Fence, and can be used as an actual fence)
Espalier is actually a very useful technique for
increasing fruit yield
gardening is small spaces
maximizing or minimizing sunlight (since the branches all face the same direction) and therefore extending the growing season
Like. this is a legitimately practical gardening method. but it looks like they squished a tree between the pages of a book. just squashed it flat like a sad little dried flower! i could use these trees as a bookmark!!!
But yes, it is also a healthy and clever way to grow lots of fruit in small spaces, in climates they might not otherwise be suited for. Iâm still going to make fun of it, but it honestly looks delightful and delicious.
Espalier!
Traditional forestry is so fascinating actually. Humans used to be much more invested in sustainable practices*, and they got creative about it.
Take coppicing. Coppicing is wild, yaâll. Young trees get repeatedly cut down so that they regenerate with extra limbs. You know, like a freaking hydra.
This doesnât harm the trees. In fact, since a regularly coppiced tree stays in the juvenile stage, this effectively makes the tree IMMORTAL, unable to be touched by age and the ravages of time. Also coppicing has been practiced since literal prehistory and has a lot of ecological benefits. In return, humans get a theoretically infinite supply of wood from one tree, instead of having to plant new ones.
tldr if you cut off a treeâs head it will grow more heads like a hydra and become functionally immortal.
*before colonizers realized they could steal all the land & trees they desired
consider: teenagers arenât apathetic about everything theyâre just used to you shitting all over whatever they show excitement about
Teen: *gets a job*
âI GOT THE JOB!â
Parents: Well, when I was your age, I already had 5 jobs and was supporting my family
Teen: *gets all Aâs*
âI worked really hard!â
Parents: Well, of course you did, this is the expectation, not a celebration.
probably why so many teens take to social media where they can enthusiastically share their interests and achievements and get positive feedback that their parents never gave
A LITTLE LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK
This hit hard
I remember once, when I was in my early 20s, I was an afternoon supervisor at my job, and I worked with mostly teenagers, and the one day this one kid, who was like 15, was bored so I suggested he could clean out the fridge. He did and when he was done I said he did a good job.
After that, this kid was cleaning out the fridge at least once a week, and I was like, âwhy are you always cleaning the fridge?â Like, I didnât mind, but it seemed odd. And he said, âone time I cleaned the fridge and you said I did a good job. I wanted to make you proud of me again.â
Literally, I changed the entire way I interacted with teenagers after that. I actually got a package of glitter stars and I would stick them on their nametags when they did a good job, and they loved it.
My manager had commented on how hard these kids work and I said, âtheyâre starved for positive feedback. They go to school all day then come to work all evening and no one appreciates it because itâs expected of them, but theyâre still kids. They need positive feedback from adults in their lives.â
Like, everyone likes feeling appreciated. Everyone likes being complimented and having their efforts be noticed. Another coworker (who was a mother of teenage children), hated that I did this, and said they were too old to be rewarded with stickers, but like⌠it wasnât about the stickers. The stickers were just a symbol that their effort was noticed and appreciated. I was just lucky that I learned this at a time when I was still young enough to remember what it was like to be a teenager. I was only 2 years out of highschool at that point and highschool is fucking hard. People forget this as they get older, but ask anyone and almost no one would ever want to go back and do it again, but they expect kids to suck it up because theyâre young so they should be able to do school full time, plus homework, and work, and maintain a healthy social life, and sleep, and spend time with family, and do chores and help out at home, and worry about college and relationships and everything else, and then just get shit on all the time and treated like theyâre lazy and entitled. And then they wonder why teenagers are apathetic.
For a german exam I had to argue against an article that was essentially âkids these days, they donât care about anything and are constantly on their phonesâ and really it was the easiest essay Iâve ever written.
Teens donât talk to adults bc adults only ask âso, howâs schoolâ to then interrupt them two sentences in. And because they canât engage in a conversation about buying houses and working in a bank. I wouldâve loved to talk about philosophy and politics and history with family the way I did with friends and in class but because I was young no one took what I had to say seriously.
And no, teens arenât always on their phone. Theyâre on their phone when theyâre bored. You think Iâm on social media when Iâm with my friends? When Iâm talking about something Iâm interested in?
Maybe the reason kids are so distant and always on their phone during family parties and the like is because youâre failing to engage and include them.
Whoop there it is
When you respect kids, they really respond and learn from you. But if you treat kids like âtheyre just a kid, what do they know??â then youâll never find out.
among us is such bullshit i got ejected bc someone walked in & found me there w/ the body but the thing is i was just finishing one last task before reporting it
this is the future jeff bozos wants
oh it absolutely is
update: the future is already here, and it is unacceptable
Tomorrow is my last day at amazon before i go back to my favorite job ever and fun fact we get dismemberment insurance. But only after so many hours. Heaven forbid you get dismembered in your first week
âŚ.please please please tell us more things about working for amazon that weâre not allowed to read in the news
fucking love that a few hundred years ago someone drew a giant naked man w/ enormous genitals in the style of a historic hill figure, then let historians convince themselves that it was ancient and historically valuable and associated w/ Roman Britain & Saxon deities & fertility rituals when actually some late 17th century jackass just thought it would be really fucking funny
thank you r/tumblr
Felixâs cute question and even cuter antics
