I’m so sorry to every trans woman or fem out there who has/wants to have a beard or facial hair. I’ve seen over the last few days just how much vitriolic hatred comes from what’s supposed to be your own community, not just cis transphobes, and it’s genuinely heartbreaking. I hope you know that your body isn’t a harmful stereotype, that you’re no less of a woman/fem for wanting facial hair, and that it’s wrong for people to expect you to conform in order to be respected. That cis transphobes view you negatively isn’t your fault, and the onus is on society to change and adapt what it views as “acceptable” femininity rather than your community shaming you into playing respectability politics. You deserve to feel safe presenting in whatever way brings you the most joy and comfort, and the very least other trans people can do is offer a safe space rather than telling you you’re doing something wrong.
Sincerely, a transmasculine person with huge breasts who plans to keep them, because fuck the notion that you have to want to pass as cis to be worthy of respect.
don't know who needs to hear this but gender non-conformity is not only for trans people. cis women can wear binders and packers. cis men can wear breast forms and tuck. cis women can use he/him pronouns and cis men can use she/her pronouns. anyone can use they/them pronouns or neopronouns. anyone can dress fem or masc regardless of gender identity. anyone can take hormones and get surgeries even if it doesn't match the 'normal' presentation for their gender. all the rules about gender are fake and you can do what you want. gender isn't some finite resource. do whatever the fuck makes you comfortable.
My transmasculinity exists because I'm a trans woman but I'm also male and that's equally important to me. Getting an F on my ID would feel very misgendering and wrong to me, but even places friendly to trans people make that kinna thing a requirement. I'm not female and I refuse to be classified as such. I am a woman. I am not a man. I am, nonetheless, male and and not female.
And unsurprisingly even other trans people have a very hard time squaring that circle and write it off as internalized transmisogyny instead of me having different faucets to my identity that work in conjunction.
Can't comprehend how someone could read about someone's personal perception of their own gender and sex and be angry about it.
All that you've said here is completely understandable to me and even of it weren't — it's your gender and your perception of it. The only person who can tell you what your gender is is you and I respect and support what you're telling us.
Most important thing about your gender is that you understand it and feel like it describes your feelings well. Not anyone else.
[pt: My transmasculinity exists because I'm a trans woman but I'm also male and that's equally important to me. Getting an F on my ID would feel very misgendering and wrong to me, but even places friendly to trans people make that kinna thing a requirement. I'm not female and I refuse to be classified as such. I am a woman. I am not a man. I am, nonetheless, male and not female. end pt.]
from what i can gather, these terms were made within a discord server and posted here, here and here. theyre specifically for those in diamoric relationships.
Stag: a diamoric with masculinity outside of the binary.
Fox: a diamoric with androgyny outside of the binary.
Swan: a diamoric with femininity outside of the binary.
Sparrow: a diamoric who is casually presenting their gender.
Crow: a diamoric who is manicured but not flashy about their gender.
Peacock: a diamoric who is flamboyantly loud about their gender.
Pigeon: someone who is a peacock and a crow.
Falcon: someone who is a crow and a sparrow.
Additional Terminology
and these are some terms ive created..
Bee: a diamoric who is like a swan, but is outhrine and is plus sized.
Hiss: a diamoric who is small, catty, and wears tomboyish clothing.
Hound: a diamoric who is androgynous and fit, tends to chase foxes.
Orca: a diamoric who is plus size, wears jewelry, and likes to be cunty.
Snarl: a diamoric who is like a stag, but is xenic and is thin.
Rosey/Rose Thorn: diamorics who derive pleasure from seeing their partner fawn/feel good, without needing to be pleasured themselves.
[ID: A pride flag with five horizontal stripes. From top to bottom, they are purple, pink, pastel yellow, light blue, and black.
In the middle of the flag there's a hand-drawn sun with a purple outline, colored with a gradient of the three middle colors of the flag. /End ID]
Transselfen:
Trans + self + en (to become, to make __, made up of something, to cause to)
[Pt: transselfen: (to become, to make __, made up of something, to cause to)]
Transselfen is a term for individuals who transition to being themselves rather than to being a particular gender.
Experiences might include:
Transitioning without any specific gender in mind
One's goals being based on whatever makes them happy or feel like themself
Transitioning without gender or trajectory connotations
Identifying most strongly as 'just an individual' or 'just themself' rather than any particular gender
Feeling like one's transition goals are unique to themself and are unrelated to gender
Flag meaning:
Purple stands for androgyny and acceptance
Pink stands for femininity and bravery
Yellow stands for neutrality and light
Blue stands for masculinity and freedom
Black stands for a unique and individual transition
The sun represents wholeness and self love.
Alt flag + technical details under the cut
Here's all the parts of the flag. The hex codes are:
#8742BF (purple)
#FF7FB2 (pink)
#FFFAC4 (yellow)
#4CE1FF (blue)
#1E2128 (black)
The gradient is done by replacing purple with #FC6796 and black with #31C4F9, which are darker shades of pink and blue respectively, and then blurring the flag.
heyo. would you try your hand at alternative versions for the Transselfen flag? yk, in the other common trans- / transgender flag layouts. plus, i think it's a term you'd like :D
I used three different trans pride formats for this. I leaned more into soft purples and that really nice pale yellow from the original flag. It's a nice color palette and I do like this term!
transselfen — “term for individuals who transition to being themselves rather than to being a particular gender.”
[image id: a set of 3 rectangular flags. the first has 4 stripes, bright light yellow, light purplish pink, medium purple, and warm near-black. the second has 5 stripes, light purplish pink, medium purple, bright light yellow, medium purple, and light purplish pink. the third has 7 stripes, sky blue, bright light yellow, light purplish pink, medium purple, light purplish pink, bright light yellow, and medium pink. end id.]
when one's presentation is masculine in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a masc manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen symbol by @solidwater05!
pt: definition, when one's presentation is masculine in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a masc manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen(link) symbol by @/solidwater05! end pt.
when one's presentation is queer in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a queer manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen symbol by @solidwater05!
pt: definition, when one's presentation is queer in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a queer manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen(link) symbol by @/solidwater05! end pt.
when one's presentation is androgynous in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in an androg manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen symbol by @solidwater05!
pt: when one's presentation is androgynous in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in an androg manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen(link) symbol by @/solidwater05! end pt.
when one's presentation is feminine in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a fem manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen symbol by @solidwater05!
pt: definition, when one's presentation is feminine in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a fem manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen(link) symbol by @/solidwater05! end pt.
when one's presentation is xenine in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a xenic manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen symbol by @solidwater05!
pt: definition, when one's presentation is xenine in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a xenic manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen(link) symbol by @/solidwater05! end pt.
when one's presentation is neutral in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a neu manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen symbol by @solidwater05!
pt: definition, when one's presentation is neutral in a way that is unique to oneself and who one is as a person, and may not align with generally expected ideas of what presenting in a neu manner may look like. the symbol in the corner is the transselfen(link) symbol by @/solidwater05! end pt.