My heart calls your name

Hide from the heavens with me

[heavenwontbethe-same]

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☾︎ Sunny ☽︎ 22 ☾︎ she/her ☽︎

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[fennecshandgf]

sometimes i think about the golden record and i want to cry

[fennecshandgf]

there is a disk. it is 12 inches in diameter, it is made of copper, plated with gold. there is an inscription— “To the makers of music – all worlds, all times” on its surface. it lies on the space probe, Voyager 1, launched in 1977, to explore interstellar space beyond our solar system.

it contains human existence.

116 images— the sun, the location of our solar system, mathematical and physical unit definitions, and our planets, including a blue and swirling white sphere simply labelled “Home.” it contains images of human dna, of our atoms, their structure, the way they divide, our anatomy, our conception, our birth.

it does not contain an image of war. nor of disease, nor poverty, nor crime, religion, or ideology.

it does contain a father looking lovingly at his daughter. it does contain the picture of a tree toad in a gentle hand, of a woman eating a grape at a supermarket.

the remainder of the disk is audio. a 90-minute selection of music from all over the world, sounds, and greetings. there are greetings in 55 different languages, one akkadian, spoken in sumer about six thousand years ago, and one wu, a modern chinese dialect. the greetings call out to a friend. it wishes them well. it asks them if they have eaten yet.

but it contains other sounds too. it holds the sound of rain, of thunder, of a volcano and an earthquake. it holds the sound of mud pots and trains. it holds the sound of a mother kissing her child.

with little to erode it in space, the golden record would probably outlast all human creation. it will be 40,000 years before it approaches another planetary system. if it does, it cannot find intelligent life. intelligent life will have to find it, retrieve it from where it floats silent and small through space. we still don’t know if they would understand it.

in 7.5 billion years, the evolution of the sun would burn the earth up, and we would not exist any longer, but the voyager would fly on, bearing a memory.

bearing a disk with a little inscription etched by hand on its surface.

[heavenwontbethe-same]

man you reach a certain age and it's all arranged marriage this arranged marriage that like please for the love of god we are in the 21st century

[squidong]

I’m about to buy and read the crow plastic romantasy book

Help

[squidong]

Welcome to the fae future, where you can never use a vibrator again.

[squidong]

He recognized her as his ~mate~. She’s Australian, so she keeps casually calling him “mate” as he gets increasingly flustered.

I genuinely cannot tell if this book is terrible or brilliant.

[squidong]

I have many questions. For instance, if his job is to destroy plastic but he spends most of his time hunting monsters, does that mean the monsters are made of plastic? How does that work?

[squidong]

I GUESS

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

This looks amazing actually

[resmeae]

I tried to find this book and found several crow romantasy books, none of which match the description. Halp.

[squidong]

The Company of Vengeful Crows: Season of the Crow, by Lana Pecherczyk

The plastic thing isn’t actually all that central to the plot as written.

[squidong]

[squidong]

“I’m sorry” and “thank you” are words that create a debt bond that fae can cash in on?

[squidong]

Also I forgot to mention - our heroine is in her mid to late thirties! She was married to an asshole ex-football (soccer) star for 15 years before the apocalypse happened, he dumped her, and poof she woke up in the fae future.

Blake (the character) is from Perth, and definitely low-brow - that’s why she got dumped in the first place. Shoutout to the notes for introducing me to the term “bogan”. Half the aussies in the notes are like “I know people who talk exactly like that” and half of them are convinced the author has never met an Australian in her life. I’m inclined to side with the first half, since the author is Australian.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Australians seeing something that Australians do in a different part of the country and declaring that no Australian does that is, in itself, very Australian.

[hollowedskin]

Look if she's in Perth this may very well be happening in real life. They do weird shit over there.

[squidong]

PREV TAGS WAIT DO THEY PLAY AMERICAN FOOTBALL IN AUSTRALIA???

I read “footballer” & thought “okay it’s not the US so that means soccer” but the way he’s described does sound more hulking and brutish than I generally think of soccer footballers.

Edit: looked it up. Australian rules football is more like American football than it is like soccer. Neat. This book is teaching me so many things

[squidong]

Did you just call us the c-word?

[squidong]

I’m not confused, dad! I’m just Australian!

River is the MMC, Talo is his dad. Our main couple are still not together despite the soulmate bond thing. She called River’s friend Ash “mate” to get under River’s skin because she was mad at him, and his family misinterpreted drastically.

I love this book with my entire heart. I’m posting the goofier excerpts, but it is genuinely a delightful romp. Not a satire or parody, quite genre-typical in fact, but extremely clever and heartfelt while still being willing to laugh at itself. Highly recommend for those who enjoy het romantasy.

[squidong]

WHO TOLD HER

[squidong]

Word of god, y’all, it sounds like the microplastics aren’t addressed 😔

[squidong]

I don’t think I can describe how poignant the context to this scene is, but I have been enjoying the crow-UV-color layer of worldbuilding immensely. Also, I was wondering about her colorful hair in the original viral post.

[squidong]

THE CULTURE CLASH WORDPLAY CONTINUES

[squidong]

So for context he carved a tree to represent her ex and—

[wiping away a tear] Blake baby you are so fucking perfect

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I love this so much I'm almost tempted to buy the previous nine, presumably non-Blake-related, books in the series.

I don't even care about romantasy.

[calellon]

unfortunately i could never be nonchalant because i am not well in the head and also my soul is on fire

[fo1k1oresque]

do you people ever think of the clockwork princess epilogue and burst into tears or is that just me

[milffrin]

guy whose voice sounds the same when hes begging to cum and begging to be killed

[milffrin]

characters this post has been tagged as:

siffrin instarsandtime - the original intended subject of this post. true! loop is true also. by extension.

dazai (bsd) - never watched bsd but considering his real-life counterpart. yeah probably

robert chase, gregory house - i don't really think so

prussia, russia (hetalia) - ?? maybe??

arthur lester - he definitely looks like it

someone's oc dave - having checked his profile on the user's website i'm inclined to agree

john ward (faith) - true.

leon kennedy - objectively true and i'll die on this hill

holden carver - with a power like that i can't imagine anything else being true

will graham - regrettably, i think this one is kinda just canon

the riddler - okay. whatever

someone's oc evan - i can't find any info on this guy :-( i'll agree with you though!

dean winchester - lmao, you fucking wish

sam winchester - ditto ^

tartaglia (genshin impact) - ok. fine. if you want

gabriel ultrakill - true

mark scout (severance) - .....

ethan winters - i don't like ethan as much as leon sorry :(

daniel molloy - i respect old man fuckers

galad rosell - more of a dim20 person than naddpod but i respect brian murphy enough to allow this

adam stanheight - true

simon riley - youuuu fucking wiiiiiish

gale bg3 - ?

anakin skywalker - i was going to say no but honestly i'll give you this one

dick grayson - you can only say this if you imagine him with long hair

jason todd - i am ambivalent

lex luthor - i don't respect bald man fuckers.

dimitri fe3h - and you aren't going to say edelgard as well? smfh

steve rogers - i don't want to talk about that.

victor frankenstein - maybe.

an unnamed character from a 2002 video game that never got an official english release - probably true

trevor philips - how did we get here

frodo baggins - uh.

daniil dankovsky - Honestly. yeah

gi hun? from squid game????? ok

joker (persona 5) - bro. true

nagito komaeda - he canonically does this!

harry dubois - man. yeah. yeah i think so.

someone's dragon age pc - likely thing for a dragon age player to say

frank iero - Hmm

deadpool - i mean. does he ever stop talking like that

zappa (guilty gear) - Yeah okay.

dirk strider - (blinks wetly)

majima goro - i enthusiastically agree on this.

[cdzen]

if i were attracted to someone i would ignore them and if someone were interested in me i would ignore them and if someone cute asked me out i would say no #myimpenetrablefortress

[treecitysessions]

Toxic swag gap relationship

[ingydars]

God the 11 year old girls you put on this earth to climb trees and play with plastic animals are buying foundation at the drug store

[theclaudehuggins]

Your icon is violently in love with you for 5 weeks how screwed are you

[urmumsfan]

i am dumber & smarter than u think. do not estimate me

[some-stars]

autocorrect just tried to change "omegaverse" to "metaverse" and i think i'm genuinely offended

[some-stars]

don't try to replace my holy speech with the devil's foul mutterings

[amarula-gold]

@theshitpostcalligrapher

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

whats up

ink: diamine oxblood

[sawasawako-archived]

*pretends to be shocked*

[wildecniht]

This whole “what if the real mental illness is SOCIETY” thing is such a tired take. ADHD is more than just “attention deficit disorder”. If capitalism weren’t a thing, I would still have executive dysfunction. I would still be unable to regulate my emotions. The fact that this is an opinion people have proves they’re still viewing mental health through the lens of capitalism and “but how does YOUR mental health affect ME?”

[feetdonttouch]

^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[adhd-community]

Oh I see, it's not a "disorder", it's just a difference in brain composition and activity that makes it much more difficult for me to thrive in modern life, and therefore causes me a lot of distress and disadvantage in multiple environments.

On another note though, how would y'all define a disorder...

Cause like...

[glozirina]

[bass-borot]

[officialmacgyver2-deactivated20]

Some ya’ll who are younger need to google Frank Serpico and read about his time in the NYPD and what the cops did to him and attempted to do to him up until the late 90′s. He literally had to go into hiding in Italy and Switzerland and multiple times people tried to kill him. He only came back to America after the mafia (who hated the NYPD a lot, obviously) said “you’re under our protection.”

[seriously-though-wtf]

Damn, NYPD is so bad, Mafia started protecting good cops

[helila]

Confessions of a Former Bastard Cop

I was a police officer for nearly ten years and I was a bastard. We all were.

[yume-fanfare]

modern social media should stop offering "sync with your phone contacts to follow them" options and start offering "block all your phone contacts so they never see your account" options

[evilkakyoin]

just gonna start killing people i dont find funny

[cthuluguu]

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

[evilkakyoin]

shut the fuck up

[cipheramnesia]

People will talk about Tumblr's amazing hatemail game but its person to person reply game is equally unhinged.