Pt 2 of my Hazbin redesigns! More are on the way! (Adam is getting a RE-redesign soon!)
DEAR READER
Three Goblin Art
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
tumblr dot com
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
styofa doing anything

#extradirty
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

Janaina Medeiros
cherry valley forever
AnasAbdin

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JVL
dirt enthusiast
Claire Keane

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❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
macklin celebrini has autism
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia

seen from Singapore
seen from Ukraine
seen from Nicaragua
seen from Brazil
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seen from Malaysia

seen from United States

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@heichouvantas
Pt 2 of my Hazbin redesigns! More are on the way! (Adam is getting a RE-redesign soon!)
a really little animated black cat with giant eyes and no other discernible features
do you get it or do you not know anything
more examples that people keep getting upset with me for not adding
I'd like to submit two of my cats as real life examples
DO NOT DO THIS!!!
If a website has a paywall, like New York Times, DO NOT use the ctrl+A shortcut then the ctrl+c shortcut as fast as you can because then you may accidentally copy the entire article before the paywall comes up. And definitely don't do ctrl+v into the next google doc or whatever you open because then you will accidentally paste the entire article into a google doc or something!!!! I repeat DO NOT do this because it is piracy which is absolutely totally wrong!!!
Also do NOT append "12ft.io/" before a URL ! Typing an URL like this https://12ft.io/<URL> will redirect to a site that would break the display of the page by removing the paywall !
Honestly it's kind of prohibited to mash CTRL+P before some paywall windows can load in to get a PDF of the article. Really shouldn't be done tbh very dangerous🤷🏿♂️ ❌️
So I just now learned about Stagecoach Mary and how have I never heard of this absolute LEGEND of a woman before
She was born a slave and freed when the Emancipation Proclamation was issued (she was about 30)
She was about six feet tall and 200 pounds and once she was free she decided she’d never take shit from anyone ever again
When one of her close friends, a nun by the name of Mother Amadeus, became ill with pneumonia at her convent in Montana, Mary headed alone into the frontier to nurse Mother Amadeus back to health
After Mother Amadeus recovered, she gave Mary a job as the foreman of the convent. She repaired buildings, took care of chickens, made the long and dangerous journeys into town for supplies, and did other odd jobs.
She could drink most men under the table, and one saloon offered five bucks and a free shot of whiskey to any man who could take a punch to the face from Mary and remain standing.
She was once said by a local paper to have broken more noses than anyone else in Montana
She was outspokenly Republican, which at this time was the liberal party in America, and would get into political debates with the more conservative townsfolk
One time a man insulted her outside the saloon so hit him in the face with a rock, and only stopped when other cowboys held her back.
On one supply run into town, her wagon overturned and the horses fled. Mary spent all night single-handedly fending off a pack of wolves with her guns before she righted the heavy wagon by herself and tracked down the spooked horses. The only thing lost in the accident was a jar of molasses.
She lost her job at the convent when she got into a gunfight with a male employee who did not want to take orders from a black woman. She reportedly shot him in the ass, which angered the local bishop.
After losing her convent job, Mary spent a brief time running a restaurant, where she welcomed and served all comers
When a job for a mail carrier opened at the local US Post Office, Mary got the job because she managed to hitch six horses to a wagon faster than any of the male candidates
She was sixty at the time
This made her the first black woman mail carrier, and the second woman mail carrier in US history
When the snows were too deep for the horses to manage the long and dangerous delivery routes, Mary would strap on snowshoes, put the bags of mail on her shoulders, and do it herself
At one point she apparently had a pet eagle????
She only retired from the mail route when she was about 70 years old, and instead made a quieter living by babysitting and running a laundry business in the town of Cascade
She was a huge baseball fan and often gave the local team a big bouquet of flowers from her garden
The people of Cascade loved Mary so much that they closed the schools annually on her birthday
When a law was passed in Montana that forbade women from drinking in saloons, the mayor of Cascade granted Mary an exemption.
When her house burned down, the whole town got together to help her build a new one
She continued drinking, fighting, and going to baseball games until she died of liver failure at 82 in 1914
Mary (far right) and the local baseball team
Anyway sorry for gushing I just now heard about her and I’m in love
I’ve heard of her, but godDAMN, if her story doesn’t bear repeating. ^w^
She has her own wikipedia page. Enjoy.
**BUSHFIRE ART COMMISSIONS!!!**
I will be doing Bushfire art commissions as of Tuesday 21st onwards! I live in Australia and have seen the impact they bushfires have had here, my city is shrouded in smoke and there are so, so many fires! This is why 50% of all commissions I do in January and February will go to bush fire fundraisers, unfortunately as commissions are my SOLE living income I cannot put more towards fundraisers, but I want to do as many as possible! Please DM me for details or a commission! I accept paypal for up front payments! Am accepting commission NOW but won’t start them until the 21st!
These fires have caused widespread issues from Australians losing their homes, to wildlife, Civilians and firefighters alike Dying. I’m trying to raise as much as I can do donate to this cause so please, if you can’t donate, share!! Thank you’
you’ve left out the best tho:
Welcome to Australia...
Where an already endangered species is on the brink of functional extinction...
Oh, and 500 million animals unique to this country have already lost their lives, upon homes that have been destoryed and lives lost of people as well...
I mean... we're only living in a literal inferno...
415 fires. Fuck are we dying...
Oh yeah and people are just fleeing to the damn ocean, you know?
Do you want to know what Hell on Earth looks like..?
Because there it is in all it's unfiltered, firey rage...
There it is... my home from space...
This is only the beginning. Our country has not only entered a new decade, it seems a new dawning era as well, because this flaming apocalypse doesn't show any sign of stopping any time soon.
And you know what saddens me? I've never seen Australian tragedies trending here on this website. I mean it's been going on for months and only now does it seem to really be getting recognized, even if it is only at #9.
And I'm going to be honest with you here - the internet, and media in general is so American centric, this website being no exception. You'd think that an entire continent being on fire for several months with devastating consequences would have more recognition, but no, it really doesn't. The most notes I've ever seen on a post about the Australian fires is at least a few thousand, and that's about it.
So just... please. If you can, with this post or any other post in regards to the fires going on down here, reblog. Because the only thing that should be spreading like wildfire, is a post about a burning country...
@slytherin-girlfriend
This, this this this this this. I’m looking out the window rn and the air is THICK With smoke.
It’s snowing in Australia but it isn’t frozen water it’s snowing- It’s ash from the 401 fires burning our country down.
Our Prime Ministers initial response to climate change? “I send my thoughts and prayers” and then he buggered off for a holiday in Hawaii. Two volunteer firefighters are among the many ash o have DIED from these fires now. A whole species (the koala) has been labelled as functionally extinct because of them, people are bow homeless, towns and states are B U R N I N G.
The closest fire to Melbourne City, Victoria, where I live, is covered in more and more smoke every hour, even though the closest fire is over AN HOUR out of the city.
We are literally burning.
Sorry for the unrelated post but this is how we are doing right now, this is what Australia is going through.
Update: there are now currently 410 fires.
2:32pm update, there are now 475 fires/incidents related to fires in Australia. It’s 42C/107F rn and that’s not even as hot as it’s supposed to get today, it will be a top of 44c/111F today. In some parts of Australia it is 53C/127.4F.
Please stay safe Australia
3:40pm update: There are now 523 fires/incidents across Australia. There’s no blue in the sky, there was an out of control house fire 5 min from me at 3 and now a bush fire 15 min from me.
The area around my work was filled with smoke from about 1pm, and travelling to my second job it’s only getting thicker
My bus overheated 20 minutes in and we had to turn the bus off completely by the side of the highway with the doors open in 42C heat to let it cool off
It’s snowing in Australia but it isn’t frozen water it’s snowing- It’s ash from the 401 fires burning our country down.
Our Prime Ministers initial response to climate change? “I send my thoughts and prayers” and then he buggered off for a holiday in Hawaii. Two volunteer firefighters are among the many ash o have DIED from these fires now. A whole species (the koala) has been labelled as functionally extinct because of them, people are bow homeless, towns and states are B U R N I N G.
The closest fire to Melbourne City, Victoria, where I live, is covered in more and more smoke every hour, even though the closest fire is over AN HOUR out of the city.
We are literally burning.
Sorry for the unrelated post but this is how we are doing right now, this is what Australia is going through.
Update: there are now currently 410 fires.
2:32pm update, there are now 475 fires/incidents related to fires in Australia. It’s 42C/107F rn and that’s not even as hot as it’s supposed to get today, it will be a top of 44c/111F today. In some parts of Australia it is 53C/127.4F.
Please stay safe Australia
3:40pm update: There are now 523 fires/incidents across Australia. There’s no blue in the sky, there was an out of control house fire 5 min from me at 3 and now a bush fire 15 min from me.
The area around my work was filled with smoke from about 1pm, and travelling to my second job it’s only getting thicker
“This cat saying “well hi!” in a southern accent”
(Source)
good fucking morning *levitates towards you with ill intent*
customers approaching store employees
I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object (“say bye bus!”) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it.
I’m glad there’s a teacher version of “accidentally called teacher ‘mom’”
when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people “my lord”
One time during family prayer, dad began: “our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you?”
One time my dad went to the White Castle drive-thru and the lady (who was supposed to say ‘Welcome to White Castle, what’s your crave?’) asked, “Welcome to White Castle, what’s your problem?”
She apologized profusely while my dad proceeded to lose his shit laughing.
Yesterday I went to Wendy’s and the girl said “Welcome to McDonalds” and then just sighed
Somebody in the elevator asked me what floor I lived on, and I answered “please open your books to page eight”, and we just kind of stared at each other, blinking.
i work retail full time and my script gets frequently messy - ill ask the same question twice, or say “$2.60 is your total” while handing back their change, or say “how are you doing today?” instead of “have a good day!” like name it ive bungled it
but anyway, this lady came thru my line buying a book and the review on the front said: “few books are well written, fewer still are important, and this book manages to be both”
as i handed her the bag i was trying to say “thanks, youre all set” and instead my brain mashed up the review and i said “thanks, youre important”
there was this short pause in which i tried to figure out what the fuck id just said. she blinked and then said “oh thank you! youre important too!”
the real kicker was one of my coworkers. when i was relating this story later his response was “at least you said something NICE. last week i accidentally combined ‘youre welcome’ and ‘no problem’ into ‘youre a problem’”
one time, since I used to work as a daycare teacher with preschoolers, i was on my college campus in my gym, and someone was running in the weight room and tripped over a machine and fell, and instead of offering to help, I just stared and said, “This is why we use our walking feet.” we both sat there for a while until the guy nodded and said, “yeah, okay, i should’ve done that.”
I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in kitchens, so I still will reflexively say shit like “behind” and “coming around” as I maneuver through spaces and around people.
Which, actually, not such a bad thing; I’m a big guy and can come across as imposing pretty easily. The position calls can help defuse that, and also help avoid collisions.
Less good is the time my brain was half functional and I let slip a “coming with a knife” while grocery shopping. THAT took some explaining.
I work in an office and send tens of emails to customers every day. Once my mum asked me to send her a train ticket I had bought for her. I emailed her “Hello mum, as agreed, please find attached the ticked you requested. Thanks, Alex”
i worked as a camp counselor, and i would have the kids tap somewhere on my legs if they needed something because im a pretty tall dude. today asked my cat if he needed something.
I have woken up in a cold sweat saying “is that for here or to go?”
Every time a friend thanks me, and I respond with “gladly” or “my pleasure”, I die completely 1000% inside
I work at a plasma donation center. When processing donors, we call them by name, they walk up to the counter, and then we ask for their name and donor number. One time, instead of saying “Robert” I hollered “Name and donor number!?” into a full waiting room. Three people started announcing their names and donor numbers before we all realized that I fucked up.
In college, I was a barista at Borders (remember Borders, you guys?!) I once drove through Taco Bell on my way home after a shift. When the cashier said, “okay, that’ll be $5.46!” I cheerfully responded, “Do you have a Borders rewards card?”
I have dealt with so many difficult customers over the years that I used to angrily call my dog “Sir” when I was mad at him.
My first job was at my nearest Panera, and after coming home from a ten-hour Sunday morning shift, I was exhausted; but when my mom called me to come downstairs, instead of replying in the grumpy teenagerish tone I usually would, I said in my cheeriest, fakest voice, “Not a problem at all, let me just check with my manager!” before realizing my mistake.
my coworker went to back up the cash registers one time and she had been at customer service right before. when we finish with a customer we have to sometimes get the attention of the next person and will shout “i can get the next person in line!” but instead of saying that she yelled “HI WHAT CAN I HELP YOU WITH” to everyone in the general area
I have told my dog “no thank you” so many times after working at a preschool
a couple of times i’ve gotten stuck in a hello how are you good how are you good how are you loop with an equally tired Fred Meyer’s cashier after a long shift but the best time was after a 10 to 10 post-holidays after they told me my total, I asked if they would like a bag today and after a confused few seconds they were like, “no… I have the bags”
Worked in a gallery where we asked people to take off their backpacks in order not to accidentally damage paintings. So when I went to the shop later and saw a guy in the line in front of me, I told him he had to remove his backpack. He probably thought I was politely trying to rob him.
The other day they had me working with softserve and fried dough. I was burned out because I kept bouncing back and forth between the fryer and my register and these people had like, 8 things in their order. We get to the ice cream part of the order, and it comes in a bowl or cone. Instead of saying “Would you like the vanilla in a bowl or cone?” I said “Would you like the bowl in a vanilla or cone?” And we all stopped and had to think that through as my cart runner is staring me down like “tf are you doing?”
I work at Hardees and we have to yell “thank you” whenever we’re told to do something because of how loud the kitchen is.
One morning, my mom hollered at me to wake up, and half-asleep me yells at full volume,
“THANK YOU”
i work with dogs, and i have to be a bit strict with them sometimes in order to keep fights from breaking out. recently, while making tea, the kettle started boiling sooner than i wanted, so without thinking i turned around sharply, pointed my finger at it and stared it down, and said, “Bad boy! You need to wait!” needless to say i was very glad i was alone
I know I’ve reblogged this a billion times but I’ve worked retail for 8 years and these things are never not funny.
I work with horses and whenever someone’s driving too fast I’ll say stuff like “whoa” and I’ve tried to click to a car because that’s a cue for a horse to go faster.
My aunt was a kindergarten teacher and when she was trying to gather everyone at a family reunion for prayer she called “One two three, eyes on me” and then exclaimed “oh! It works on adults!”
do not read these when you’re trying to eat (especially salad)
Hospitality? Hell
Hoo boy
Hoo
Boy
So. To preface this mini rant, DiCaprio’s closes at 10pm. The kitchen closes at 9:45pm. Alrighty. We’re all informed. Now onwards!
I had a big booking, 25 people, maybe 30 depending. This was at 9pm, already an annoying time but I can work with that. I should be out of there by 10:30. A little overtime but that’s okay.
Now, it hits 9:30 so we assume, yknow, they aren’t coming. Oh boy was I wrong
At 9:45 this booking starts drifting in a few at a time, the manager is all about making customers happy so hey! Just get their orders in ASAP
Aight, I’ll fake smile through this. Except 25 people has somehow become 38. I’m sorry, what? Am I suddenly unable to do math because they seem pretty far apart in my humble waitress opinion
It takes me four pages in my notepad to take their orders which aren’t all put through until almost 10:15. I’m still fairly okay with this, even though my ride has left so it’ll take me an hour to get home, and we aren’t offering coffee or dessert because yknow, we’re CLOSED
And then this bitch. Oh boy this bitch. Decides suddenly the veal Parma with veggies? Which I fully remember taking because she grabbed my arm to tell me her order before running off to chat?
It’s
Wrong
She apparently ordered a chicken Parma with chips. Hoo boy. I’m gritting my teeth at this point but hey! Meals are all out, I just need to clear and set as fast as possible and we’re home free!
Except
They don’t leave
Until
11:30
I want to know what sort of self entitled drugs this fucking group was on to stay an HOUR AND A HALF past closing time. To be almost an HOUR LATE to their already late booking
And just the cherry on top? After staying so late for this one asshole table? I get $8 as a tip. I’m sorry, what?
What the fuck is wrong with some customers
The difference between my summer skin tone and my winter skin tone makes me hesitant to believe any skin bleaching rumors about celebrities tbh
You look better light skinned tbh
Ya know at first I was just gonna reply with a clever retort along the lines of “you would sound a lot smarter with your mouth closed”, and call it a day. But tbh I’m not mad at you for saying that, I pity you. You’re just another black woman thats been brainwashed by the media into having that “lightskin is the rightskin” mentality. Hopefully one day you’ll open your eyes and realize that beauty isn’t just Beyonce and Rihanna but also Naomi Campbell, Gabrielle Union and Lupita Nyong’o.😊😌
^^^^^
^^^^^
^^^^^^ and Kelly Rowland
Idc he looks hella cute both light and tanned. I’d date him if he was cool w it.
Well he’s actually a she now so
and she’s gorgeous
*insert heart eyes emoji*
She’s so pretty
I saw this moving in my notes again and thought wow this post is where majority of my followers came from, I should update it.
eXCUSE ME SHE’S BEAUTIFUL???????????????
Yes, she is!!!!! And in both skintones!!!!!
TRANS RIGHTS PLOT TWIST
!!!!!
every time i listen to “you’re a mean one mr. grinch” i can’t help but sit there and think “what did the grinch do to hurt you?” because dude just stands there for 2 minutes and 58 seconds and drags the grinch into the dirt
he stole christmas, kayla! stop with your #notallgrinches propaganda!
you know what if someone told me i was a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce i’d probably be bitter enough to steal christmas too
Interestingly, though The Grinch Who Stole Christmas is narrated by Boris Karloff, the big musical number is sung by the late Thurl Ravenscroft - an American voice actor better known as the voice of Tony the Tiger.
My headcanon is that the Grinch and Tony the Tiger had a bad breakup, and “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” is the resulting breakup song.
Did this really HAVE to be the first thing I see when I opened up Tumblr?
Yes.
oh god theres art
@altadude you know what must be done.
ive been avoiding reblogging this honestly but just. What the fuck. What the fuck tumblr
I apologize to all my followers for this
if i had to read this you do too
I have a hate-hate relationship with this
Good grief… I’m sorry, but I can’t not reblog this…
Tis the season bitches
DAMN IT WHY WOULD YOU BRING THIS BACK YOU HEATHEN
Why is this on my dash?
…..I’m.. Bothered? by the fact that I’m not bothered by this.
You’re not bothered?? I’m not only not bothered, I’m freaking invested. I’m having actual empathetic sadness for The Grinch. I want them to go into couple’s counseling. I want the “ten years later” when Tony visits Whoville on business and meets the reformed Grinch whose heart has grown 3 times its usual size. I want them to reminisce over a shared dinner of roast beast and wine, then spend a drunken night together, then realize that maybe things are different and people really do change. I want a 3-act story where there’s a long dark night of soul searching and the realization that maybe we’ve all got a little bit of bad banana with greasy black peel inside us, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make a damned fine banana bread if someone will give us a chance.
Tis the season
@randomslasher - I think this is the post that made me follow you, even though I am not a member of the Sanders Sides fandom. Which has since led to some minor confusion at times, but no regrets.
Woman: Hey honey.
Girlfriend: Oh, hey babe! What's up?
Woman: I was wondering if uh, we could, try something new tonight? ...In the bedroom?
Girlfriend: Oh- Ohhh! What have you got in mind?
Woman: Something I've wanted to do for a very, very long time. Just trust me, okay? In the bedroom, ten minutes, on all fours and [makes ggghgrhrhrhrhhrhggh noise].
Girlfriend: [makes sound back]
Woman: Yes! Just do it, okay?
[Eleven Minutes Later]:
Girlfriend: [makes The Sound]
Woman: [Dr. Doofenshmirtz voice]: Perry the Platypus! Looks like you walked into my bed-inator!
Truly. This is how two girls do it in bed
It’s exam season at uni, you know what that means!