some people have boundaries that are rooted in confusing, offensive, or disagreeable beliefs. and the thing is, no matter how much you disagree with those core beliefs, as long as the boundary is a *personal* one, it still needs to be respected.
for example: i'm bi. when i was dating, i knew many gay and straight people who did not want to date bi people. that boundary is fine and i respect it. it has happened before they told me they don't want to date bisexuals because we're promiscuous and unfaithful. is that gross and offensive? sure. i don't respect that belief one bit. but i respect the boundary and never tried to force anything.
you can challenge those beliefs, but you cannot challenge personal boundaries. and if it's clear that you're only challenging someone's beliefs to push their boundaries, don't be surprised when they lash out at you.
on a related note, i've seen an uptick in people debating this about some topics relating to women's bodily autonomy (when do they ever stop, really). so i'm tapping this post as reminder of my stance on the matter.
whether a woman aborts a disabled fetus because she personally can't care for a disabled child, or if she disgustingly sees disabled people as inferior, that has no bearing on whether on the morality of the abortion itself.
whether a woman chooses not to date/sleep with people from any marginalized race, belief system, gender, class, physical or mental ability, etc., it can be due to "acceptable" reasons of past experiences or incompatibility, or due to "unacceptable" bigotry (extremely loaded arguments of acceptibility btw), again, it doesn't matter for that choice itself.
the answer "women need to use their genitals to make X choice for X reason" isn't to say "women need to use their genitals to make Y choice for Y reason". the obsession with women's reproductive systems and romantic/sexual relationships as progressive praxis is disgusting.
