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YOU ARE THE REASON
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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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@humanovoid
Journey to the men's washroom
English added by me :)
my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old
Op this is the funniest thing I’ve ever read
op how could you just hide this from me in the tag this makes this objectively 10000000% funnier
50 First Doses
You trick Louis? You trick Louis like a common fool? Oh jail, jail for owners ONE MILLION YE-oh what’s this? A treat?
born to always mourn the present like it’s already become a memory
every time i see those posts like ‘what food from a show did YOU always wanna try’ i go lol none? but i just remembered im a liar
i always wanted the fucking soup brock made in the pokemon anime
Hello OP, i don’t have anyway to prove this is the same recipe they make in the shows but i make this to calm my inner kid from wanting the fictional soup:
300gr bacon, beef or chicken. A meat of your choice. These go specially well. I prefer chicken tights. Diced
1 medium onion, diced.
Garlic minced (i used 2-4 pieces depending on size)
300gr carrot, cleaned, peeled and diced.
3 sticks of celery, washed and diced.
800gr potato. Washed, peeled diced in quarters.
1 head of broccoli.
8 cups of stock of your preference. I recommend using the bones of the beef or chicken, but veggies stock works too for a vegetarian or vegan version.
3 tablespoons all purpose flour.
1 cup whole milk. (Almond or rice milk work fine for a vegan option)
½ cup heavy cream. (Skip it for a vegan option)
Salt and black pepper to taste.
½ teaspoon paprika, use the spicy one to get the warmth up a notch in winter.
1 tablespoon fresh chopped coriander. Optional.
1 cup diced gouda or manchego cheese. Optional but really ties all together.
Make sure you have all your ingredients ready and at hand for this one to make sure it comes out nice and tasty!!!
In a pot put water and the bones to prepare your stock (chicken, beef, veggie) You can use premade or bouillon cubes, just make sure its 8 cups worth of broth. In a different pot boil the potatoes until soft.
In a big pot put some butter or olive oil to fry the onion, when it turns a little transparent add the garlic, move constantly.
Add the celery and diced carrots, moving constantly.
The carrot will get a little brighter in color, add the diced meat. Salt and pepper to your taste.
Meanwhile, blend the potatoes with enough stock so your blender wont have trouble blending. If you have a food processor, it’ll be easier.
Ad the remaining stock to you big pot with the veggies and meat, add the broccoli chopped in bite size pieces. Add the paprika and taste for salt and pepper. Let over a medium fire for 10 min.
Separate 3 tbsp of the stock to mix with the flour, set aside. This will be a thickening agent.
Pour the potato mix on the big pot, move to integrate and taste for salt and pepper.
Add the milk and heavy cream. Move with a laddle. Have a final taste and let over low fire for 5 min.
Serve hot and decorate with a pinch of coriander and some cubes of cheese.
ENJOY!
Notes:
I personally prefer to use chicken, love how it goes with potatoes and veggies. Also the tight is very tender and flavorful. With beef you have to be careful not to overcook it or it’ll get gummy and hard to bite, so make adjustments.
VEGAN: could also skip the meat, cheese and heavy cream for a vegan option.
I make it for my younger sister and she loves it. Instead of meat i add some diced, toasted nuts when served. Cashew, pecan and pistachios work nicely.
You’ll have to use 5 tbsp of flour to thicken up the broth a tid bit more without the heavy cream but you can still use a vegan milk.
You can totally skip the coriander, but it adds another dept of flavor.
Do try it with the cheese tho, i promise it’s GODLY. Gouda and manchego are my fave, the melt nicely and have a strong after taste, but i guess any cheese that melts could work.
Finally, if you are like me and like spicy food you can add chopped chili. Serrano and arbol chiles are my go to’s, freshly chopped sprinkled just after serving my bowl.
Hope y'all give it a try and if you have any doubts do ask!
Provecho!
this is literally the best addition i’ve ever gotten to any of my posts thank you so much
Hey I tried this recipe out and I can confirm that it tastes heavenly!!
Can confirm this soup is absolutely divine!
Substituted spinach for broccoli because my partner is not a fan of the latter and used chicken and bacon. Gonna try it again with a nice Italian sausage in place of the chicken next time.
@kdinjenzen
Mommy needs you to smoke the whole cigarette so you grow up big and strong, ok sweetie?
Tweets that are stronger than any counseling
#Kenergy
would give anything to be invited to this
born to always mourn the present like it’s already become a memory
that is the face of a man worried he will be next
Good news, he was not next! In fact, she accepted him as her mate, he learned the crane mating dance and now every year, he artificially inseminates her with crane semen to expand the very endangered crane population. True story.
Sorry, he WHAT? Imagine being this man's boss and having to sit him down like. Listen. Brian. We need you to fuck the bird. You have to act like you're excited about it.
crane husband.....
this is the diametric opposite of all those awful swan wife stories and i love it.
(WalWaPo makes you jump through like three separate hoops before you can read the article, so I will share some of the highlights:
Walnut was born in a species-recovery breeding program in the 1980′s. The program had crane chicks hand-raised by human volunteers, and at that time they did not fully understand the measures necessary make sure that the chicks do not imprint on humans and retain their identity as cranes.
As a result, her keepers believe, Walnut does not recognize other cranes as members of her own species.
It has not been proven that Walnut killed her previous suitors; however, there is a persistent rumor in the white-naped-crane-conservation community that she did.
Because this species is highly endangered, and the gene pool of the captive population is small, it’s pretty important for the survival of her species that Walnut A) mate, and B) not kill a bunch of other cranes.
The actual name of the keeper is Chris Crowe.
They both arrived at the Smithsonian Conservation Biology Institute in 2004.
Walnut immediately began paying special attention to Chris--and ignoring the eligible male crane in a nearby enclosure.
Walnut initiated their courtship, performing the opening moves of a mating dance.
Chris realized that if he reciprocated the mating dance, it might be possible to artificially inseminate Walnut with her participation and consent. (The process normally involves restraining the bird.)
It worked!
Chris and Walnut have had five children, who were raised by other crane couples at the facility--sometimes the biological dad and his mate--both because it’s unclear whether Walnut would accept the chicks as her own, and because Chris is not equipped to be a Crane Dad.
However, the Institute provides her with artificial eggs to sit on, and Chris takes his turn looking after them. (This would not work with real eggs because he can’t sit on them properly, but Walnut seems to feel that he is on the job if he just stands over them.)
Chris accepts that he is pretty much married to this bird. White-naped cranes live to be about 60, and they mate for life, so he knows he can’t retire while Walnut is alive. (At the time of the article, Walnut was 36, and Chris 42.)
Legit cannot pick the funniest part of this
she has not been PROVEN to have killed her exes, but there is a PERSISTENT RUMOR (really officers she's simply DEVASTATED, she sobs, wearing a new feather boa unfortunately resembling her most recent deceased husband)
His name is Chris CROWE. (Mrs. Walnut Crane-Crowe?)
the mental images of a whole human man learning and performing the crane mating dance, and "sitting" on artificial eggs so she thinks he's performing his duties as a husband and father (and apparently OBJECTS if he does not?)
"chris, buddy, you gotta marry the possibly-murderous crane lady for the GOOD OF THE SPECIES." (alternately: "chris, my man! good news! we found you a very interested lady! She's 36, she's very spirited and independent, she holds a very important and rare status in her society! ...Is there a downside? WELL...")
chris sits any potential human partners down, like "my love, you must understand before we wed,,, i am already... Attached" (camera drifts wistfully to the above photo) "Lady Walnut and I have an,, Understanding... the relationship is open, but very committed"
just had to explain this post to my father bc he thought my stifled laughter was a signal of illness.
well done, everyone, good game. hit the showers.
Not only is he 'married' to walnut, this has apparently happened SEVERAL times, so he has MULTIPLE crane wives, none of which know about any of his other crane wives. This man is, for some unknown reason, irresistible to cranes
the “this content has been removed for violating Tumblr’s Community Guidelines” notice really adds a lot of flavor to this post and somehow makes it MORE obscene than whatever that actually was
World Heritage Post
“…use things to have good days.”
the loading screen trying to convince me to use even one of my 3000 consumables
Barbieheimer is gonna be so epic
source
secret technique "one hour smoke break" only discussed by the monks in hushed whispers
and POST
Recently I got back to my old AU Pticenoga and Vaughn stuff, which can be found here and here , and decided to upload more arts to this site.
Now you can also find her in-game look here!
(My husband and I are having lots of fun with this stuff as we’re projecting out relationship on it lol. Engagement ring was also Borderlands themed )
Hedwig/Pticenoga also has a human form, she’s a “wild siren“ as I call her, because she’s been exposed to the “wild“ Eridium at a very young age and it gave her this side effect. Normally sirens just grow wings; in her case it went way further.
It’s not canon of course and there’s no Pticenoga in the original game, but I still like this little thingy. Especially after BL3 came out (sadly, it was nothing that I expected and left me a little disappointed). I also appreciate that some of you guys really love this AU, and it means a lot to me. Cursed arts can be found here
I also had to remove some of the old arts but you can always find them here if you’re interested.
There’s gonna be a new comic about them posted soon