Destiny has a Sense of Humour?

Gary, 30, Scotland Hello

[wumblr]

beautiful women named magenta cartridge low are trying to contact me on my printer

[stuffman]

People have written a lot of touchy-feely pieces on this subject but I thought I’d get right to the heart of the matter

[sqbr]

[The artist, putting a simple cake next to a much fancier one: “Aw man, that guy’s cake is way better than mine.” The Audience, gleefully holding up a knife and fork “HOLY SHIT! TWO CAKES!”]

[elvencantation]

additions from the og artist (credit)

[scientia-rex]

“Holy shit two cakes,” I mutter to myself as I do fucking anything these days, this post was a godsend

[a-daks]

I see this headline:

As a former cakewrecks lover, I figured sure, I’ll bite. Let’s see this cake. Literally nothing could have prepared me for this cake. 

They paid $49 for this “frog-themed” cake and honestly no amount of money in the world could be put on this masterpiece:

Keep reading

[ferretteeth]

I wish I could erase this post from my memory and experience seeing this image for the first time all over again

[fangirltothefullest]

As someone with adhd I DO forget what it looks like and so every time I am so unprepared XD

[byjove]

Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*

My cat: Father is…evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.

[cryoverkiltmilk]

The spiritual successor to Miette

[manicgoblinnightmarewoman]

Might I also add

[shydestinybread]

May i add the piece from artist Verbal Vomit

[unyanizedcatboys]

Glad to see we’re all in agreement that cats talk like disparaged victorian children

[explorerrowan]

I am so incredibly glad we finally moved on from “i can has”. Cats are clearly smart enough for advanced sentence structure and dumb enough to draw entirely incorrect conclusions about what they’re talking about.

[dualclock]

My cat, banging the cabnet door over and over and over: bang bang bang

Me: you will not earn what you desire by banging the cabinet door.

My cat: This is a test of wills, is it not? We shall see if your ability to put up with my incessant banging outlasts my eternal lust for snackie treats. Years of conditioning have hardened me for this purpose. bang bang bang

Me: ksst!

My cat, throwing herself to the ground like she’s been shot: Oh! Oh I have been assailed in my own home! Have mercy, have pity! Surely in the cruel darkness of your heart there is some mote of goodness that might stay your hand! Do not strike me, I pray you!

Me: ok

My cat, after waiting about 3 minutes: bang bang bang

[notcaycepollard]

[callmebliss]

Can haz snackytreat

[ladyshinga]

(source)

[dogsrulepeopledrool]

Source

[fandom]

This post is the most reblogged post of the year! Congratulations!

[moist-astronaut]

you’re absolutely correct it was

[yournonbinaryicon]

Hell yeah

[worldheritageposts-official]

World Heritage Post

[arsnof]

[busket]

"im tired of living through major historical events" is now "dear lord please let me witness a high profile political assassination in the next 1-2 years. amen"

[pansyfemme]

idk if this is a contreversial take or not but i think that the ideal internet experience is being able to remove specific things (triggers, nsfw, gore) if you truly dont want to see them but overall being also shown things you aren’t interested in. i think one of my fave things about tumblr is seeing like 50% of my dash be about fandoms im not in, bands i dont like and quotes from books i dont want to read rather than this endless feedback loop of tiktok showing me ‘exactly what i want to see’ in a trap to keep me online as long as possible and blind to communities outside of my own. i want a mix of curating my own experience and a healthy dose of content i don’t already know i want to see, yknow?

[guerrillatech]

[kiophen]

solo jazz suicune

[hylkio]

I want this as a tattoo

[alienbycomics]

A comic explaining the internet phenomenon… why are so many Bionicle fans trans? 🏳️‍⚧️ Happy Bionicle Day!

[wheeloffortune-design]

I think the internet as a whole needs to ask themselves one simple question when they see a video.

Why was the camera filming.

There are so many videos that seem real, but when you realize the camera was already filming with a great angle, you can see that it's all staged.

Yes, there are dash cams, security footage, people accidentally filming real things happening. But so many are just staged!! And no one in the notes takes the camera preparation into consideration!

This is 2024, you need to know how to spot bots lying to you, but also humans lying to you.

[t4tvampireisms]

I hope Trump and Biden simultaneously die via cardiac arrest during the debate.

[merinnan]

[no-goodbyes-no-regrets]

Tumblr you are SLEEPING on this band!

A bye bye bye parody from the Stacy's dad guys (Sub-Radio) - bi bi bi

And even Lance Bass approves!

And before people start dragging them for queerbaiting or whatever - the singer is actually bi.

[rubyvroom]

Okay honestly, "whatever your gender is I'm gay for you" is the best possible description of what it's like to be bi. Congrats.

[sexygaywizard]

[tastefullyoffensive]

[fruitsoftheweb]

Damage prediction on pears during transportation.

[hollowtones]

bad and naughty children get put in The Pear Wiggler to atone for their crimes