i am in love with fictional me

she/her • incorrect quotes • slytherin

[jackstheprinceofhearts]

apollo: you're so evil, how do you even sleep at night??????

jacks: with your wife.

[inlovewithficboys]

This made me spit my juice and crack up so bad my mom was staring at me like i was crazy

[inlovewithficboys]

The only thing i am looking forward to next year is tella and evajacks interaction.

Tella would be like "evangeline he manipulated you, he can control emotions, his kiss is deadly!"

And eva would smirk and look and jacks and think 'dont i know that' and jacks would just stand there all smug

[xoparrish]

no thoughts, just thinking about how jacks didn’t even hesitate to use the power of the stones to go back in time and save evangeline :’)

[inlovewithficboys]

Crying rn

[mrspettyferr]

Wedding Theory

Spoilers for Ballad of Never After

In Once Upon a Broken Heart, Eva uses a pen for "finding dreams that don’t exist yet."

Evangeline had been unable to resist trying the pen, and as soon as she did, a fledgling dream had taken form. She didn’t know how long she’d spent drawing, only that when her piece was done, it felt like a picture of a promise.

Evangeline and her love were at the end of a dock covered in candles, which made the ocean glow so that it looked like a sea of fallen stars. Only night and her moon watched. No one else was there, just Evangeline and her groom. Their foreheads were pressed together—and she might not have known exactly what they were doing, if not for the words her pen had etched into the sky:

And then they will write their vows on their hands and place them over each other’s chests, so they may sink into their hearts, where they will be kept safe forever and always.

It would have been a ceremony her parents would have approved of. It would have been a simple wedding made of oaths and love, and promises of an ever after spent together.

So we know Eva sees her future wedding. Now fast forward to Ballad, when Jacks and Eva go to the Hollow, she describes a lake that looks like its filled with stars, and later in her dream, there's a dock overlooking the lake.

Which means most likely they will get married at the Hollow. <3

[inlovewithficboys]

That made me feel better than anything honestly

[escapism-z-deactivated20240203]

Tbona was one of the most anticipated books this year and it did not disappoint.

[inlovewithficboys]

Yeah it definitely did no disappoint just wrecked me

[yonemurishiroku]

Omg Nico in a black slim-fit sleeveless turtleneck with fingerless gloves and knee-high combat boots and straps alhckwhdkshxishss please———-😭😭✨💕💕🙈🙉💀💀💀💀💀💀

[inlovewithficboys]

I didnt knew i needed this

.

.

SOMEONE GIMME THIS PLEEAASEEE

[inlovewithficboys]

If the ballad of never after did not have a god damn happy ending and jacks and eva did not end up together,

I swear to god, this world wont be ready for what i've planned for it

[inlovewithficboys]

Its 3:45 am

Just finished tbona

Was crying for the past 30 minutes

Finished my fries

Cried a little more

Listening to sad songs

[inlovewithficboys]

I was not, am not, will not be ever over the ballad of never after

It emotionally WRECKED me

even more than song of Achilles

And regarding the first post, i dont even know what to do with this world right now

Stephanie garber you fucking ruined me

[inlovewithficboys]

If the ballad of never after did not have a god damn happy ending and jacks and eva did not end up together,

I swear to god, this world wont be ready for what i've planned for it

[inlovewithficboys]

Its 3:45 am

Just finished tbona

Was crying for the past 30 minutes

Finished my fries

Cried a little more

Listening to sad songs

[inlovewithficboys]

The biggest mistake you can do is call a Pakistani an indian

[sabajeeb-deactivated20220920]

sablog dinner karlo aur sojao

[mazaak-deactivated20230102]

aapko bhi sona chahiye cuz enna sona kyu rab ne banaya

[inlovewithficboys]

Okay, Kinda cringe but smooth

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

…THEY’RE CALLED T-SHIRTS BECAUSE THEY RESEMBLE THE LETTER T

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

also they were originally a form of underwear and I think that’s nifty!

[shroompuff1]

GAUD THIS HAS LONG BEEN COMMON KNOLEDGE

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

I don’t know what the fuck counts as common knowledge!!! for years I thought everyone knew that lobsters have teeth in their stomachs & blood can be used as an egg substitute. my perspective is slightly skewy!

[perniciousprophet]

How much blood contitutes one egg?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

¼ cup of blood can be substituted for one medium sized egg

[venomaximus]

There are 37.2 trillion cells in the human body and this post put all of my cells in attack mode

[gigglepuffpixie]

does it have to be wet blood? because dried blood is more shelf stable

i actually have a similar question regarding the infamous “virgin blood.” honestly, the dry stuff is just so much easier to work with

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

my thought process is that if milk can be powdered, blood probably can be too seeing as mammal milk is just filtered blood

[acethememelorde]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

#breast milk is actually called white blood by some people

milk is mostly made out of white blood cells, we should absolutely just refer to it as White Blood

[nimblermortal]

Do I Need To Pull Out The Perpetual Lactation Story?

[lemon-badgeress]

…yeeeeees? yes.

[nimblermortal]

This is a summary of a branch of medieval theology.

As we all know, women are responsible for original sin, as a result of which mankind was cast from the Garden of Eden and women were cursed with painful childbirth. In addition women have periods, which are the sign of original sin.

Problem: The Virgin Mary was perfect. Can’t have been cursed with original sin. No periods.

Question: Where does the blood go?

For all our wonderful theories about spontaneous generation and phlogiston, we do believe in some form of conservation of matter. If women have all this extra blood all the time, you can’t just have one wandering around with it building up inside her. It’s gotta go somewhere!

Well, we figured it out in the end. You see, as we all know not least from reading the above post, milk is just boiled blood. So for Mary, the blood just sort of condensed and she was in a state of perpetual lactation.

This led to things like a particular saint (it’s Bernard) having a vision of the Madonna appearing before him and squirting her breast milk into his mouth, to apply either wisdom or a cure for an eye infection, which has delightfully been depicted in several works of art.

[lemon-badgeress]

may i change my answer

[kittydesade]

no

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

someone needs to make that painting into a gif tbh

[synthetic-puppy-intelligence]

i hate this so much

[inlovewithficboys]

Can i please somehow unread this

[devils-little-sista]

Lil Nas X passing though Tartarus on his way to Satan: 🎼 Call me when you want 🎼 CALL ME WHEN YOU need 🎼 call me in the morning I’ll be on the way 🎼

Nico and Will who don’t have access to the internet: ………*worried silence*

Nico: uh Whomst the fuck was that????

Will: why was he on a stripper pole???

Nico: and do we have to worry about him coming back to kill us?????

Nico and Will simultaneously: ………Probably

Nico: let’s get out of here before he climbs up that pole like the mom in Hereditary and comes to sacrifice to who knows what entity

[deadhumourist4loif]

“Jacks—” His name came out like a sob. She knew he wasn’t a savior, but she didn’t want a savior just then. She didn’t want someone to hold her while she cried and tell her it would be all right. She wanted fury, she wanted rage, she wanted a villain to tell her she’d done exactly what she needed to do.

[inlovewithficboys]

I

M

SCREAMING

*AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH*

[inlovewithficboys]

Nico: i gave leo a 'get better soon'

Will: i didnt knew he was sick

Nico: oh he isnt

Nico: i just thought he could do better

[placeapuppyinmyhair]

the cruel prince in a nutshell:

[herinnerwolf]

“even when evangeline was stone, she was still soft.”

- jacks’ pov

miss stephanie you really are a menace

[inlovewithficboys]

I haven't read it yet, and i thought this was cute and i was grinning like an idiot but then the realisations came to me and my smile slowly fell

[magicalbookwyvern]

BALLAD IS OUT TODAY AND I KNOW IT'S NOT WISE BUT IM INHALING IT AS SOON AS I GET MY HANDS ON THAT BOOK

[jackstheprinceofhearts]

I DID THAT LOL IM EXCITED TO SEE EVERYONES REACTIONS

[inlovewithficboys]

Omg i can't until next week my because my monthly exams are going on😭😭