Emilia

She/Her 24

[intolunarorbit]

Hi!!! we're amy :D

Rewriting our pinned because things have changed! Hi we're Emilia (amy for short). 24 y/o, she/her, British, chronically ill

Feel free to interact with our posts, but don't send us asks or DMs expecting a conversation if you're cis or a minor. Most posts are queued

System stuff: it turns out we're actually 2 people!! There's Amy who's our more creative, sappy, and horny side. And now also Lucy, who comes out when we're low energy and is way more mature and less scatterbrained (and huge into ffxiv as a result). Amy's fronting like most of the time so unless marked otherwise it's her. Also don't send us DMs with or asking for system advice, we're taking this at our own pace so it's all very specific to us and we don't want that to change

Currently fixated on: ffxiv (finished the MSQ, the current EX, and the first 2 savage fights - can't get prog parties together for m11 tho) we're a BRD main on phantom (chaos) if anybody wants to do anything), loona (chuu's our bias, if you're reading this go and listen to Only Cry In The Rain right now if you haven't already), paleontology (particularly dinosaurs - especially triassic ones) and ttrpgs (running a massive and really unconventional dnd campaign while also homebrewing my own system, feel free to DM about either if you're curious). We also have passing interests in stardew valley, magic the gathering, trains, and history

And most importantly this blog is for bothering our wives @wowzoerz-blog @chloethedatadork @class444swr (and gathering screenshots for the other 2 who aren't on tumblr)

[th4t1guylol]

[intolunarorbit]

Aethelflaed learned portal magic and for about 4 months rerouted the latrines into a disused cupboard in the guild leader's office. Which is quite funny in and of itself but it turns out that the cupboard had a use and it was for storing people who'd wronged the guild and were being imprisoned in magical crystals

[zedogica]

ok. i survived 25 years outside the international space station. who gives a shit

[biglawbear]

Technically most moss is outside the international space station

[davvvd]

[princecroutons]

imagine you're some guy and you're going through the woods one day and you stumble upon a house and the people who live there just give you free food and eventually let you inside and it's like nothing you've ever seen before and the people are so nice and loving towards you and then one day they decide to never let you leave again, steal your balls, and give you a stupid fucking hair cut

[princecroutons]

my name is croutons and this is my story

[pinniposting]

everyone knows what a baby harp seal looks like, but here’s an adult! this one’s tracker makes it look like a live bomb

photo: W.J. Grecian, SMRU

[putridtooth]

may i suggest

the sapple (seal apple)

[quasi-normalcy]

Do you suppose the Cowboy Planets in Star Trek *know* that they're cowboy planets? Do you suppose that people there ever overhear Starfleet Officers calling them "cowboy planets" and think "Well, that's a mighty strange thin' to call this here planet. What's particularly cowboy about it? Ol' Jed up the road is a blacksmith and Bullwhip Betty 'cross town runs a house o' ill repute; how'd'you figure they's cowpolk? I mean, I reckon maybe we have a fair few cowboys round these parts but surely no more'n most planets in the universe."

[quasi-normalcy]

Imagine if aliens came to Earth and called it, like, an "audiologist planet", and you had no idea why.

[quasi-normalcy]

"I'm a barista!"

"Yeah, but you're part of the general audiologist melange."

"What does that even mean!?"

[mattpresents]

How do you know you're not Asexual? Maybe you just haven't met the right nobody.

[inbabylontheywept]

there is a stripper pole in my attic. i saw it in a dumpster one day, and i went, shit, this is exactly the kind of thing my wife would want. and i didnt really want it in the house, what with it being a used stripper pole lightly seasoned with dumpster juice, but i mentally decided that if she were to see it and ask for it, i would say she could have it, and then sure enough, later that evening, she went soooo baaaaaaaabs there's this thing by the dumpster and i want it but i get it if you don't want it in the house but i have to show it to you- and i went, no you dont, you can have the pole, and that was the most surprised i have ever made her look. even compared to the day when i proposed to her, which she was prepared enough that we both knew she would say yes, and she could also get her hair done up and have a cute outfit, but not so prepared that she was not fucking flabbergasted by the 12 empty decoy ringboxes i sprung on her. i handed her so many decoy ring boxes that day. still one of the funniest things i've ever done to her.

anyway we like pacing around together and ranting in the attic but sometimes instead of pacing one of us will just hang on the pole and spin, and the other person will watch on the beanbag, which makes for these really goofy conversations where the person on the bag will say something that gets the other persons goat, such as, hypothetically, that xylophones do not belong in rock music, and then the other person will go on a tirade about this, but they'll actually only be facing the Hot Take Speaker half of the time, what because of the pole, so the response will sound something like

I can't believe

you would even suggest such

a stupid opinion. You've

been to a Danny Elfman

concert! How can you

have heard Oingo Boingo

live and say with a straight face

that they alone do not justify

rock and roll xylophones

and then that person will continue until they get too dizzy, then they'll get off the pole, and by unspoken agreement, the person on the bag will get up and trade places with them to deliver their rebuttal while also spinning and it just creates this sort of crazy strip-court lawyers debating absolute nonsense for no reason kind of vibe that frankly just really does it for us.

i don't really have any marriage advice for this i guess its just a look at what being married can look like. i thought that being married would involve a lot more stuff like carving the turkey, or barbecuing, or watching the sunset, and if id known how much time it would involve arguing for xylphones in rock music while spinning upside down i might have prepared for it a little differently.

[intolunarorbit]

Gang I think I'm gonna start Poasting this weekend (just realised I have 107 drafts - which I use as a "I'll form a coherent thought about this at a later date" button)

[worldofultimategaming]

The World of Ultimate Gaming

[lyseenjoyer]

[boomer-mythology-destroyer]

[palmer]

I’m going to the grocery store does anyone want to sublet my apartment for 45 minutes

[jurynullification]

How much

[palmer]

Only 3400

[jurynullification]

hot damn 🏃‍♂️ cmon guys lets go 🏃‍♂️🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🐕🧞‍♀️

[palmer]

ok I’m back you and your boyfriend and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your dog and your djinn can go

[scariest-crepeypastas]

“Run!” I cried, cryingly! “It’s Geoff the Killer!”

“That’s right,” The pale freak snarled, brandishing the Knife, “And I’m going to— wait did you just spell my name ‘Geoff’ what the hell is wrong with you”

[prokopetz]

"Isn't it weird that [thing humans commonly eat] is poisonous to literally every domesticated animal" I mean, there's a pretty good chance that [thing humans commonly eat] is at least mildly poisonous to humans, too. One of our quirks as a species is that we think our food is bland if it doesn't have enough poison in it.

[xeansicemane]

Humans have a really weird mix of mundane superpowers.

We're not fast and don't have a lot of natural weaponry but we're bizarrely tolerant to a broad range of toxins to the point that one toxin is considered a morning necessity for some to perform at work. Gotta love us.

[vexwerewolf]

[missmacfire]

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[catasters]