We're off to never neverland

[orteil42]

I must not explain the joke. Explaining the joke is the joke-killer. I will face my followers who did not get the joke. I will permit them to pass over me and through me

[orteil42]

you are making this so difficult

[beardedmrbean]

[argentinasexogay]

NOOOO THE SIX ORGASMS PERIOD HACK GOT REBLOGS DISABLED JUST AS I TRIED TO REBLOG IT whatever. I'm trying that next period.

[argentinasexogay]

Rescued media. Fuck it.

[achesspiece]

the world is a mess but at least we still have cunnilingus and spicy curry

[achesspiece]

um. you probably should not mix these activities

[achesspiece]

[hi-raethia]

underrated form of humor: just making shit up in past tense

[xenomorphique]

My personal favourite:

[caramelchaitea]

[justsomeantifas]

Lavish CEO’s Wife, sobbing hysterically after CEO assassination: I don’t know I don’t know I guess he killed millions of people for our money??? I don’t know I don’t know!!!

[justsomeantifas]

Wild that you can use a system to kill millions and that makes you money but you kill one guy with a gun and that’s a crime.

[slackermouse]

another engels hit

[nb-nightwing-deactivated2022111]

they posted a full version lol it’s mr Stacy’s dad for me

[the-fallen-blue]

[ruimtetijd]

it’s on YouTube too btw! and in the description there’s links to their spotify

[thesnadger]

Poor Stacy, all her friends are so horny for her parents and there’s nothing she can do about it.

[vaspider]

Y'all have to watch the rest of their shit. It’s great.

[vaspider]

It’s important to me that you know that Bi Bi Bi has an adorable verse from the rest of the band going “we are straight but supportive!”

It’s very cute.

[sentimental-apathy]

I literally cannot breathe omfg

[vaspider]

I had to get up and go into the bathroom bc I was hyperventilating trying not to laugh out loud at 4 am with Emet asleep in the room

[dee-the-red-witch]

I... OH MY FUCKING GAWD.

[maidthings]

when a centaur dies, the horse half obviously goes to hell, but the human half ascends to heaven, detached and missing its lower horse body, forced to go about the rest of its afterlife mourning the loss of something vile and profane, which is in a sense its own kind of hell

[therealharbingerofdevastation]

Since Gandalf smokes weed and Radagast does shrooms, I have a theory that each of the wizards represents a drug. Saruman is cocaine.

[badjokesbyjeff]

A math teacher, a gym teacher, and an art teacher die and arrive in heaven at the same time.

God tells them that heaven is full and they will have to trick the devil to be let in. God calls the devil and the devil comes in and introduces himself.

The math teacher tries first and gives him a hard equation. The devil solves it in 10 seconds and the teacher is sent to hell.

The gym teacher asks him to do 1,000 push-ups in a row without stopping. The devil does it without stopping and the gym teacher is sent to hell.

The art teacher then says, “Give me a chair with 7 holes carved in it.” The devil hands him the chair. The art teacher sits down on it and farts. He asks the devil, “What hole did the fart come out of?” The devil replies, “Easy, the third one.” The art teacher then says, “No, my asshole.” And then makes his way to heaven.

[babyfoxcollectionthings]

[typhlonectes]

BIG ASS STURGEON

[safetynot9uaranteed]

[introvertedx10]

[headspace-hotel]

This linguistic problem is only going to continue getting worse unless we fuck it in the ass now.

[kermitlesbian]

when I was in high school my dad was speeding like crazy because I was running late to my job at the cemetery. and the cop who pulled him over gave him three whole tickets because who the hell goes 95 in a 25??? but then, when my dad went to court the cop didn’t show, and so the judge looked over at the charges and just couldn’t believe it. he thought the cop must’ve been so racist that he made it up because who the hell goes 95 in a 25? so my dad got all 3 tickets dismissed bc of racism. that he didn’t even experience because he was in fact going 95 in a 25.

[kermitlesbian]

to clarify. my dad used to be a cab driver in ny and he also grew up in india so he just drives like a dickhead.

[memewhore]

[wack-ashimself]

[frog-punk]

need more women with swords giving me wisdom tbh