pappy

does anyone know where an old man can.. dribble out a little piss?

[zhenni12]

TADC FINALE SPOILERS!!

…

[insomniacrori]

Importnat mission from Kinger

Don't worry. 0.2 is easy to look after.

[itseasytoremember]

So this one time I was in a hospital recovering from an emergency surgery on my leg, and had to be there long enough that they had to change my bedding, so, doped up on three kinds of pain meds and antibiotics my dad wheels me into the hallway while the nurses work.

"dad" I say, my eyes barely open "it's Colonel Sanders" while pointing down the hallway. He looks, and at the end of the hallway, there's a portrait of an old man, the donor who paid for the wing of the hospital I'm recovering in.

My dad explains as much to me, and goes "I mean the guy *kinda* looks like him, but why would Colonel Sanders pay for a hospital wing Mississauga Ontario? I think those drugs might me messing with you"

Then the nurse comes out of the room. I go "hey, who is that picture of?"

She looks at the portrait. She looks at me. She looks at my dad. She looks at the painting. She looks at me again.

"you don't recognize the Colonel??"

[the-haiku-bot]

Then the nurse comes out

of the room. I go “hey, who

is that picture of?”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[dariablogs]

Which one do you get when you like?!

Pride

Gay

Lesbian

Bisexual

Pansexual

Transgender

Aroce

Non binary

Omnisexual

Others write in comments if i missed it!!

Remaining time: 6 days 2 hours

[sashimi55]

Human bodies are so weird like the upper half consists of every single vital organ and the lower half is legs

[dambiex]

[hydrachea]

> turns on my computer

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> opens my email

> disables a new AI feature that was turned on by default

> launches a software

> disables a new AI fea

[goth-queen]

[parkerjams]

happy birthday roman here’s my roman build-a-bear as celebration 🎉

[wannablegendary]

Everyone talks about janus lying but honestly one of his most consistent traits is being absurdly direct once he's allowed to speak

He'll just walk into a conversation and go

"Hello. The problem is this."

And everybody acts shocked

[hellowearerats]

[cherryhatter-deactivated2015072]

KICK THE CAN!

Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.

To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.

[visibun]

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

[drtanner]

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!

[westrastorm]

First time kicking it too!

[tatumsdrawing]

DP Mechanic AU Part 10

Masterpost

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 4.5 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9A Part 9B Part 10

Danny was pulled out of his doze by the sound of gravel being crushed under heavy tires. He sat up from where he had been sprawled across the backseat of his Honda to see a familiar white truck parked behind him. Both boys exited their vehicles. 

The tension was palpable. After crying into Dash’s shoulder for longer than he wanted to admit to, Danny had immediately excused himself and left Dash outside on the stoop. While both boys were trying to play it cool, after more than two weeks of no contact after the incident, their nerves were on fire, each waiting on the other to bring up what comes next for their tentative situationship. 

“What happened?” Dash asked? 

“Smoke started coming out of my hood when I was driving. Figured that was a problem, so you know. Pulled over.” 

Dash gave a small smile before continuing, “What color was the smoke?” 

“Uh... white I think.” Danny replied as he followed Dash to the front of his car. 

Dash hummed as he looked over the engine bay, glad to put his focus on something tangible and less awkward. 

“I think it’s just a coolant leak.” He said after a moment. “See there?” 

Danny followed the direction Dash was pointing to see a goop of green viscous substance crusted on a hose near the engine. 

“Looks like ectoplasm.” Danny stated, looking perplexed. 

His response confused Dash in return. He knew- as did all residents of Amity Park by this point - what ectoplasm was and what it looked like, but he has no reason to believe it would be found under the hood of a car. 

“Pretty sure it’s just coolant” Dash countered. 

“Is coolant green?” 

“It can be. Your car needed this kind anyway. Didn’t you see me replace it when I was fixing your water pump?” 

“I was doing homework.” 

To Dash’s horror he watched as Danny swabbed some of the goop with his fingers and brought it to his face. 

“It’s ectoplasm.” Danny stated as he stared at Dash, surprised at such an emotional reaction. “I was checking to see if it was ectoplasm, and it is.” 

Dash could only gawk, his eyebrows drawn together and mouth slightly agape as his bewilderment over Danny’s actions sank in. 

“Wha-...a-... Is that how you normally check? Also what if it wasn’t?! What if it was coolant and you ended up poisoning yourself?!” 

“And what, die?” Danny laughed. “Been there, done that.” 

“WHAT?!” Dash cried, his state of horror skyrocketing.

“What?” Danny returned defensively, “How do you think you get ghost powers?” 

“I don’t know! I figured you just got zapped by something your parents made!” Dash countered. 

“I mean you’re not too far off. I just also had to die a little bit.” 

“Holy shit” Dash breathed. He understood now why Danny hadn’t wanted to talk about it ages ago when they were in his truck. But Danny’s current casual tone at the admittance of his own death was making the already overwhelming news worse. 

“Danny, you’ve died.” Dash reiterated just to put into words the problem that was happening. 

“Yeah?... Did you really not put that together? I know people- I mean, I’ve literally heard you and Paulina talk about who Phantom was when he was alive. you know, past tense. Like I know you know ghosts are dead” Danny recounted. 

Masterpost

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 4.5 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9A Part 9B Part 10

Finally! Part 10 exits! Thank you all for waiting. It took a hot minute to gain the time, motivation, and inspiration for me to figure this bad boy out. But it's finally here, and I'm so happy to announce that the boys are not getting back together. Unfortunately for you all I love a bittersweet ending. There is still one more part to this AU before it's all wrapped up, and I might make an epilogue. But overall, I'm looking to leave it more open-ended because I think it's more satisfying that way (I'm sure many would disagree, but unfortunately I am not sorry.)

Alrighty. I'll see ya'll in the next part (whenever the hell that happens)

Also don't ya'll love that the art in almost every part looks different from the last part? I personally am not upset by this, but it's funny to see what drawing process I'm vibing with during the creation process

[butchqueersapphic]

TOOLbelt (2022) by Martha Summers

[uhmnohoney-deactivated20210204]

Cate Blanchett though. 

[allthatcold]

get yourself someone who can do both

[what-a-catch]

@gwen-no-fear

[gokuma]

You could do the same with Lee Pace

[write-like-an-american]

What I’m getting from this is that Marvel turns elves Goth

[cakeisnotpie]

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[divorcedbasil]

vid i stole off reddit and feel like i need everyone to watch

[thebaconsandwichofregret]

This is a really fantastic return to form for this genre of post. In recent years there's been less and less effort put into this vital aspect of internet culture, it's nice to see a return to the truly artisanal work of the late 00s.

[phinarei]

Now THIS is what the internet exists for. I was LOCKED IN the whole time.

[postarcadian]

the thing I love most about how tumblr users use tags is that it’s like what if a social media website had a footnotes system

[pacey-bunce-loves-joey]

she’s the only person getting a pass on Baz’ wrath if they showed up matching to the function