i'm the man, apparently.

Semi-avid world saver, adventurer, and bad-guy-beater-upper. Occasional artist every now and then. Curious and/or friendly people invited to clicky-click the old 'ask' button for info.

[toastgull]

Reblog and you’re guaranteed to be successful at whatever you do next!

[itscrazycasey]

Need me some luck

[zerozerozio]

bring back tumblr ask culture let me. bother you with questions and statements

[boimann]

reblog to let people know it's ok to bother you with questions and statements

[apocryphics]

oh ok

[gorps]

[exeuntstormtroopers]

“Why would you stop in hell?” has changed my brain chemistry

[brisbone]

*clears throat* Hey my friends, I attended a bee wedding this past weekend. I bet you would like to know how was it.

[wycombewiggins]

How was it?

[brisbone]

You had two bee there

[insomniac-arrest]

it’s so bizarre when animated American films are set in a certain location and then only certain characters have the accents of that place. It makes no damn sense!! like

WHY IS SHE MORE FRENCH THAN THE REST OF THEM???

[insomniac-arrest]

WHY ARE THESE GUYS MORE SCOTTISH THAN THE KIDS??

(also, aren’t they Vikings or something?)

[bramblepatch]

To be fair, almost everyone in Ratatouille does have a French accent. The real question is why Linguini and also all the rats sound intensely American

If it was just the rats I’d say it’s because the movie can be interpreted to mean that the rats understand but don’t necessarily speak human languages so the rat dialog isn’t literally taking place the way we see it but that doesn’t explain why Linguini has a rat accent

[pupangelremade-deactivated20211]

LINGUINI HAS A RAT ACCENT 

[noah-moth-cursed-chaos]

Do we ever hear like

For sure that Linguini grew up in France tho?

It could be possible he’s just an American immigrant

[burningivy]

I mean his name is Alfredo Linguini so I always assumed he was Italian

[noah-moth-cursed-chaos]

I’m sorry his first name is Alfredo?

[noah-moth-cursed-chaos]

What

[insomniac-arrest]

ALFREDO???

[bauliya]

he’s American you guys his mother was American it was mentioned in the beginning

[insomniac-arrest]

I’m sorry, I’ve moved on to the fact his mother was going through her cupboard for baby names

[ohemaa-warrior]

Alfredo was a name before it was a sauce let’s go over the movie from the top again

[dappercyborg]

This is Alfredo di Lelio (right) the inventor of fettuccine Alfredo, he’d come out to the table and make it in front of you by hand

The chap on the left is an airport

[ceekari]

I think you might have your left and right mixed up, my friend

[gogogadgetgolem]

Great post everyone. Hit the showers.

[funnypages]

Superman says fuck ICE. Be like Superman

[naughtynanzhu]

MILDRED?????

[shottxyz]

[lordgroose]

my favorite work memory from this store will always be “hey remember when the subway inside the store closed down and they let me take a bunch of their shit for free and now it lives inside my house?”

my life is a joke

[shisasan]

𝙵𝚎𝚋𝚛𝚞𝚊𝚛𝚢 𝟷, 𝟷𝟿𝟸𝟸 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙳𝚒𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝙾𝚏 𝙵𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚣 𝙺𝚊𝚏𝚔𝚊, 𝟷𝟿𝟷𝟺-𝟷𝟿𝟸𝟹

[ottermatopoeia]

vibing with Franz Kafka 99 years ago

[ziracona]

@sluttyfranzkafka

[sluttyfranzkafka]

Oh mood. Planning this for the 100th year anniversary

[sluttyfranzkafka]

Happy 100 years of feeling nothing, merely tired

[astrophanie]

[dryadalis]

juniorbizarre:

scared to death of election day so i made a vine compilation

[loveandlucky]

Oh my fucking god. I’ve been searching for the no its gucki vine for 5 fuckijg years and only going through old tags have i finally found it

[qualitytimeswithqualitylads]

Massive L to our ancestors for not domesticating the Bear for the ultimate friend

[fortooate]

i sympathize with the post on the one hand but also ‘man we shoulda domesticated bears’ has the same energy as a divorced dad being like ‘i should have married that girl from high school’ when the girl in question was never ever interested and also turned out to be a lesbian frontwoman for an obscure but respected ska revival band

[nudityandnerdery]

Which is a change, because usually being interested in a bear is sort of the opposite of being interested in a lesbian.

[scienceandfandoms]

Visit Original Link

My friend was messing with Never Gonna Give You Up on her record player and she sped it up. It beCAME A FREAKING MAGICAL GIRL THEME.

[swedebeast]

[dicktator-cain-deactivated20181]

Reminds me of a late 80s or early 90s anime ending theme.

[patrickat]

[joey-wheeler-official]

Swords are bougie garbage, spears and axes are the weapons of the honest working man

[taiga-fujimura-official]

IMAGINE GETTING KILLED BY WILD ANIMALS BECAUSE YOU FAILED TO DISTANCE YOURSELF

THIS POST MADE BY POLEARM GANG

[unadulteratedpiratepizza]

I have a Sword and a Spear, because my family makes pottery and aren’t low class farmers like yours

[biggerb0at]

Lmao this dude doesnt even have an axe.

[unadulteratedpiratepizza]

I mean, we’re potters, not glass blowers. Look at this fucker talking about owning three weapons

[scrimblobimblobadimbo-deactivat]

Halberd gang rise up. It’s like a spear AND an axe.

[tardigradetheking]

yeah well lets see you split wood with it

[scrimblobimblobadimbo-deactivat]

Can’t hear you from all the way over there! I’ve got my halberd between us! Poke poke.

[tardigradetheking]

hey hey

bitch

[scrimblobimblobadimbo-deactivat]

YEAH WELL LET’S SEE YOU SPLIT WOOD WITH IT

[meckamecha]

The fuck’s all this bougie shit about? Who the fuck has money for metal weapons in this economy?

[nico-robin-official]

elitist jackass talking abt ‘crafted weapons’ just pick up a rock you fucking snob

[kyoshis-blog]

[royaltealovingkookiness]

One of the best things in this scene is Ozai’s terrified face.

Zuko straight up told him that he would join the Avatar and help him. And what did Ozai do? He gave him a small, dismissive smirk. 

Because what would his weak, failure of a son could do against all the might of the Fire Nation? He didn’t even care, because he thought Zuko’s help would not make the slightest difference.

But this is the moment he realizes that the kid he thought was a pathetic, useless bender, actually taught the Avatar firebending, including his epic “fuck-you Dad” lightning redirect move (which is btw also Iroh’s “fuck-you, Brother” move), taking away Ozai’s biggest weapon and saving Aang’s life.

[flameo-hotman]

[roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it]

Staff: *bans female presenting nipples*

Me: goddamnit this is exactly how Japanese tentacle porn was created

[roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it]

Japanese. Tentacle. Porn.

Alright everyone sit your asses down and shut up I’m finna learn y’all a thing

Ok so in the early 1900s there’s this dude named Franz Ferdinand and then there’s some peeps that wanna kill him. They all get together one day to kill him while he’s in his car. The first one was a pussy and chickened out and the second one threw a grenade but forgot to factor in the delay so it blew up way passed his car so he took cyanide and jumped into a river but the cyanide was expired and therefore useless and the river was like six inches deep. The rest of them were like “fuck this” and went to get a sandwich. However, Ferdinand’s driver took a wrong turn and was like “oh well I’ll just turn around at this sandwich shop” and the guys were like “oh shit isn’t that the guy we’re trying to kill” and they shot him starting WW1.

The Germans got their asses handed to them in WW1 causing them to get all butthurt and put hitler into power. Around this time Japan was trying to take over eastern Asia (basically just a small portion of China but its the thought that counts) and Germany was like “hey do you guys wanna be friends and take over the world together?” And Japan was like “hell ya my dude” and WW2 started. Also Italy was there. Anyway Germany/Japan/Italy all got their asses kicked and much like post WW1 Germany, Japan got a much stricter government. Their new strict government outlawed porn but the people of Japan were horny and one guy was like “hey guys do you remember those American soldiers that were just here kicking our asses? Well they brought these things called comic books so maybe we could make porn in comic book style” thus the birth of hentai. But then the government tried to ban that because it still showed dicks and dicks weren’t allowed so they started drawing porn with any relitively dick shaped object, the most popular being tentacles. It became so popular that even after the porn ban was lifted people continued making tentacle porn because it was such a widespread fetish.

So there you have it:

The assassination of Franz Ferdinand lead to the creation of Japanese tentacle porn

[roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it]

so for some reason this post has disappeared off my dash so i spent forever searching to bring it back again you’re welcome 

[joeythemostawesome]

Brilliant.

[heckifiknowcomics]