This feels absolutely weird writing it but i have a feeling that i need to write it somewhere because i have nobody to talk about it with.
Lexa's death shaped me as a person. That sounds weird right? And it is. I can't remember how old i was when i first watched the hundred...but i was definitely a young teen who had no idea what was happening in her brain. And the 100 was the first series i've genuinely fell in love with. And than came Lexa and Clarke...and than they killed her. And i cried like a baby- because Clexa was how i figured out that i'm a lesbian. And i genuinely yearn for the character because world is so freaking unfair. I'm 20 now- i will never rewatch the series again. I've written fanfictions about her, i've read HUNDREDS of them and thats how i even found out what AO3 is. I had to put a pause on reading anything with Clexa because my heart couldnt handle it...and now after years the past few days i did it again- watch edits and read fanfictions and create mine that will most likely never be published...and all the emotions came flooding back even stronger than they've had before. Am i not too old for this shit?
I don't think i will ever get over her death..and over Clexa in general. And im so mad and so freaking sad..i can't even describe how im feeling and i know i will have to stop talking about them again or i will go insane. I mourn someone i've never met and someone that didnt even exist.
If you have the same feelings..you are not alone. Death is not the end 🤍 I love you guys (and i cant even put my feelings about this into one post without genuinely loosing the will to live)
My name is Mahmoud, and I'm a 17-year-old from Gaza. The ongoing war has devastated my city, destroyed my school, and made daily life incredibly challenging.
Despite these hardships, I'm determined to continue my education and build a better future. I've been given a chance to study abroad, but I need help to cover the costs of leaving Gaza, as well as living expenses and other essentials abroad once the crossing opens.. 🙏
If you can, please consider donating or sharing, your kindness can truly make a difference, and thanks for your time. ❤🍉
https://gofund.me/bd3ccf0b 🔗
Just sharing for a little bit of help ✨️ reposting is appreciated!
Guess who failed their driving test in the first 5 minutes and than made a complete fool out of herself by LITERALLY sobbing so much that the instructor had told her to rather not try again cuz she's not made for it 🫠 anyway if you want to find me i will be rotting in my room for the rest of my life in embarassment
List 5 songs you like to listen to, then publish this and send this ask to the last 5 people in your notifs 🎶
ok then! :3
The Jetset Life Is Gonna Kill You - My chem
The Sharpest Lives- my chem :3
DESTROYA- my chem (no not because of the moaning)
Hand Me My Shovel, I’m Going In! -will wood
FIRE4FUN - Jhariah
since I’d rather not go into peoples asks who most likely have never even interacted with me, I’ll @ them!
@forgivemeiamoldbutstillachild @joey-regrets-nothing @artiepoison @barton-n-bishop @give-them-hell
"Show, don’t tell" means letting readers experience a story through actions, senses, and dialogue instead of outright explaining things. Here are some practical tips to achieve that:
1. Use Sensory Details
Tell: "The room was cold."
Show: "Her breath puffed in faint clouds, and she shivered as frost clung to the edges of the window."
Tell: "He was scared."
Show: "His hands trembled, and his heart thudded so loudly he was sure they could hear it too."
2. Focus on Actions
Tell: "She was angry."
Show: "She slammed the mug onto the counter, coffee sloshing over the rim as her jaw clenched."
Tell: "He was exhausted."
Show: "He stumbled through the door, collapsing onto the couch without even bothering to remove his shoes."
3. Use Dialogue
What characters say and how they say it can reveal their emotions, intentions, or traits.
Tell: "She was worried about the storm."
Show: "Do you think it'll reach us?" she asked, her voice tight, her fingers twisting the hem of her shirt.
4. Show Internal Conflict Through Thoughts or Reactions
Tell: "He was jealous of his friend."
Show: "As his friend held up the trophy, he forced a smile, swallowing the bitter lump rising in his throat."
5. Describe the Environment to Reflect Mood
Use the setting to mirror or hint at emotions or themes.
Tell: "The town was eerie."
Show: "Empty streets stretched into the mist, and the only sound was the faint creak of a weathered sign swinging in the wind."
6. Let Readers Infer Through Context
Give enough clues for the reader to piece things together without spelling it out.
Tell: "The man was a thief."
Show: "He moved through the crowd, fingers brushing pockets, his hand darting away with a glint of gold."
7. Use Subtext in Interactions
What’s left unsaid can reveal as much as what’s spoken.
Tell: "They were uncomfortable around each other."
Show: "He avoided her eyes, pretending to study the painting on the wall. She smoothed her dress for the third time, her fingers fumbling with the hem."
8. Compare to Relatable Experiences
Use metaphors, similes, or comparisons to make an emotion or situation vivid.
Tell: "The mountain was huge."
Show: "The mountain loomed above them, its peak disappearing into the clouds, as if it pierced the heavens."
Practice Example:
Tell: "The village had been destroyed by the fire."
Show: "Charred beams jutted from the rubble like broken ribs, the acrid smell of ash lingering in the air. A child's shoe lay half-buried in the soot, its leather curled from the heat."
reblog if you believe fanfics are as valid as books that were published and sold by authors who write as their main careers. I'm trying to prove a point
"just write the story you want to read!" they said. well, guess what, now i have 14 unfinished drafts because apparently, i want to read 14 different stories at once.
°•°Silly little ideas from my head, feel free to write on them if you credit me!°•°
☆She is like the most akward at flirting, always looking somewhere else than in your direction, rubbing her fingers or doing that little thing with her feet when you talk to her for more than five seconds before you two got together
☆She is the most open to you when she is high, changing into a complete needy cuddle bug whinning if you get too far away from her even if its to go to the bathroom
☆She has like a hundred drawings of you in her bedside drawer and you pretend not to know about them, because she is embarassed about drawing you in your sleep
☆She steals Joel's clothes simply because they are too comfy and cool looking, especially the flannels and jackets, but than ends up giving them to you.. so you're practically wearing Joel's clothes without knowing?
☆She tried to look cool when Cat did her tattoo but after you two got home all she wanted was to snuggle and for you to play with her hair because to be honest it hurt more than a clicker bite
☆She is terrified of chickens, like to death terrified. Those little creates seem to hate her more than every bigot in Jackson together, she forces you to feed them and refuses to touch even the baby chicks, calling them little devil spawns. (You remind her that she is your own little devil spawn)
☆On every special day she makes you little handmade gifts, preferring them over anything else. Like love letters, paper stars with wishes or sweet messeges inside, even makes paper roses and tries to carve you something
☆She was horrified when she found out that Jesse had shared the 'bigot sandwiches' with you and woved to never let you eat a bad sandwich in her life again, making sure that she is the one to always pack them for you on your patrols even tho she cant cook at all and manages to make green eggs on daily basis
☆Joel&Ellie fanfiction, no plot, just a lot of fluff mixed with a dash of angst and hope.
☆TLDR: Ellie has flashbacks from Fedra school and thinks about her relationship with Joel and her friends, they all unite together to give her the best Jackson experience. Joel sings to Ellie and she figures out that they are intertwined in every universe
☆4,7k words
Settling into Jackson is proving itself to be much more difficult, than Ellie thought it would be.
Everyone has been sweet and kind to her, especially Joel. So fucking sweet and kind. And that was the fucking problem. Nobody has ever been so..nice to her, not ever. At least not for that long, without wanting something in return.
(Ellie didn't think that she could really count Riley, because the girl didn't have much choice than to be her roommate. And even tho they were bestfriends, Riley had still decided to leave her and fun away to join the Fireflies, even if she came back in the end, which was a mistake. Maybe if she had never returned to say her goodbies, she would still be alive and well. Riley was her first victim.)
And that was the thing, she didn't know what could Joel possibly want from her and honestly, she has been getting more and more anxious thinking about it every day.
The people from QZ that had raised her, did so just so she could join the community in the future and be in the workforce, they didn't waste any of their precious recourses for someone, that wouldn't be a future working prospect.
Marlene wanted to keep her alive just because of her imunity, she had kept her locked inside a room for observation, caring for her as if she was more of a lost puppy than a human being. She wasn't exactly mean to her, but not kind either.
Ellie was pretty sure, that nobody could ever love her for herself alone, without seeing her as the way to the cure, as an asset or for her body.
(She didn't want to think about David, but his words were still carved deep into her mind. The way his hands had grabbed her, his face tensed up in anger, the smell of the fire and how it felt when he...)
That was until Joel came along.
She was just a cargo for him at first, a job that needed to be done so that he could find his brother- and save the humanity. But he didn't leave her, not after Tess's death, not after he had found out that there wasn't any way to make a cure.
Suddenly she wasn't just a job to be done and get over, she felt important and loved for the first time in her whole life. She became important to him for some reason. At least enough that he had saved her, multiple times. Even when he had never said it out loud, or directly to her.
'When i went to pull the trigger, I-I flinched, Still dont know why.
Anyway, the reason im telling you all of this-
I know why you're telling me all this.
Yeah, I reckon you do.
So time heals all wounds, I guess.
It wasn't time that did it.'
(And maybe, maybe she had saved him too.)
Like right now, he was tolerating having her head in his lap, slowly stroking her hair with his rough fingers, while they were watching an old movie and eating popcorn. Not as a special treat, for something that she had managed to do or some accomplishment, but just because. Without any reason behind it.
The main problem was, that she was living for these moments, to be close to him, listening to his stories from the time before the cordyceps outbreak, she didn't want this to ever come to an end.
But nobody had ever kept her for this long yet, and she didn't know what the the price for that was. He never said anything about how she could pay him back, not a single word. He wasn't reminding her of how in debt she was to him every day, or that she wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for him.
It was much easier in the QZ, she didn't have to think about it there, the rules and expectations were set in stone and everyone knew about them. If you fuck it up, you find out and they will swiftly make you forget about ever doing it again.
Not only was that system very effective and worked almost perfectly, at least in her school.
She knew most of the punishments, some were harsher than the others but there were always consequences to her actions and she was definitely one of the most troubled kids.
(It didn't matter than it was mostly because of the constant bullying from teachers and other kids, or that she was truly trying her best but it was never good enough for anyone.)
(Ellie had imagined that joel would say something like that it was because they were assholes and just didn't care enough to truly get inside her little gremlin brain. But she was never brave enough to share that part of her live with him, too scared that by saying it he would think it through and decide that she was truly not worth it.)
Fuck around and find out, that was the unspoken rule that everyone knew there. No exceptions. It didn't matter if it was clearly an accident, or if someone else framed you for it, you still got the consequences.
The almost faded scars, that were all around her upper back and shoulders, were a clear reminder of it for some time now, but it didn't seem to be the same here in Jackson, or at least not with Joel.
There wasn't much time for him to really discipline her on the road, or even in the hospital. But even than he had never even tried to, other than making his annoyance clear to her and trying to frame Tommy to take her away.
(But he came back in the end, and that was more than any adult had done for her before.)
Even when she was really trying to imagine him punishing her, there wasn't reay any punishment that seemed to suit him. At least not the ones that she had went through in the QZ.
He didn't hit her, not even once. It wasn't like she enjoyed being hit, but she was more than used to it from the QZ. She wasn't exactly the strongest and when Riley left, that had made her into guite an easy target for the other kids. She didn't even count the adults, because that was normal. A few slaps here, some kicks there maybe even a whipping if she had crossed the line enough or when they've just felt like it.
But for some reason, he was proving himself to be more overprotective of her, guarding her from any harm that could possibly come across her way. She still didn't really know why, but it seemed like he was even glad for her clumsy and yapping company for some weird reason. Even tho he had never missed the opportunity to tell her how annoying she was or call her a brat, it never seemed to more than just a playful teasing.
"Your head is gonna explode from thinking so hard, kiddo. Your brain is not used to it." Joel was looking directly into her face now, instead of the movie, again with the stupid kind smile plastered on his face. He must have noticed that she was out of it long ago, but just didn't say anything until now.
Which was another thing, that would have gotten at least her fingers snapped by the ruler a few times in the QZ, but here it didn't seem to be such a big deal.
"Fuck off, old man. At least mine doesn't have just hundred years old spiderwebs in it." She was now smirking at him, quickly gaining back her composure. He seemed to be more amused by her words, than offended in any way.
"Little brat, watch the movie." That was just one of his nicknames, that seemingly appeared to come out of nowhere, right after his favorite 'kiddo.' Not that she was complaining in the slightest, even tho it wasn't the nicest one, it was hers.
And she never had anything that was trully hers until now.
•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
Ellie was listening to Jesse's yapping about the new space movie, something about a big bang and aliens, that he had heard about last night from some new kid in their school, when the topic of punishments suddenly came up for the very first time from Cat.
They were tacked up the unused part of the barn, that now was more of as their secret base, where they were spending most of their time after school or just whenever they needed to get away from the adults.
"Can you even believe it, my mum is so freaking ridiculous, she decided to punish me because of the missed curfew yesterday." Cat was saying, clearly really annoyed by her mum.
And suddenly, Ellie was looking at her, her eyes almost popping out from her skull, scanning her from top to bottom, trying to find some kind of an injury or bruise from the punishment. But there wasn't anything visible, or at least not where she could see it.
No bruises on her face from slapping, no split lip from it either. The girl appeared to be moving just fine and not in pain, so the probability that she was whipped or cut were really slim, unless she was really good at covering it.
Cat didn't seem to notice Ellie's frantic checkup on her, too bussy complaining about her parents. And Jesse seemed to be too bussy explaining how the alien ship worked to care about how- borderline insane- she was looking.
"I wasn't even that late! Just half an hour. She's just so dramatic." There was an overemphasised sigh at the end of the sentence, before the girl threw herself back on the stack of old hay.
Ellie was pretty sure, that her heart was being really close to just jumping out of her chest at that moment, and running far away from there. She could feel the tight knot getting even tighter in her stomach, if that was even possible, before she managed to gather the courage to finally ask.
"How did..how did she punish you?" Ellie asked more quietly than usual, trying to stop her voice from trembeling. On one side, she really didn't want to know, but on the other she felt like she needed to know so she could prepare herself, because Joel would surely be at least similar in this like the other parents in Jackson.
(The fact that she had stayed past her curfew so many times without getting in trouble, didn't even seem to cross her mind, with how much she was focused on thinking about the perfect plan how to help out her friend.)
Her mind was fully running and she was imagining the worst case scenarios, from getting all of her rations taken away, to solitary containment for weeks on end.
She didn't know, how would the taking away rations really work in Jackson, because seemed to be more than plentiful there, but if that was the case, she could share hers.
Joel was always so worried about her not eating enough, so they have plenty of fresh food like eggs and vegetables in their fridge, even some snacks. Maybe she could just sneak in and take a little bit and he probably wouldn't even notice. It wouldn't be the first time, that she would have to steal food for herself or someone else.
Being fast and small- even tho it was mainly from malnutrition- were always one of her biggest advantages. She could sneak almost anywhere without being noticed, and there always was a tiny hiding spot, just big enough for her in the close proximity, somewhere where noone else would even try to fit in.
Or maybe, if it was really bad, she could hide Cat in her room. Or run away with her, maybe not out of Jackson but to somewhere safe. They could take some supplies and hide, just like she did in the QZ. There weren't much good hiding places in Jackson, but surely she could manage to find at least something.
Or maybe they could try-
"She took all of my new fantasy books away!"
Oh.
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°
The school in Jackson was also very different from what she had been used to.
Nobody was fighting over food during lunch time- mostly because everyone had their lunch prepared and delivered from the dinning room, or their parents had packed them one- but still. Not even one person tried to steal her food, which was weird.
More than weird.
They've had lunches back in the QZ too, but the food there had been entirely different. In Jackson, it almost always was some kind of meat or fish- mostly chicken or any other type of birds, because they were the easiest to take care of- potatoes or bread with vegetables and a piece of fruit, sometimes even something sweet for a dessert.
Where as in the QZ, their lunches had mostly consisted of dried meat of any kind, makeshift hard bread or crackers and sometimes canned vegetables or fruit, but that was only a few times a month if even that.
(Ellie was just really glad that they didn't have to eat rats at that time like she had seen some guys in the QZ cooking and than selling to people. Their food might have been gross and bland but at least it wasn't rats- or at least she had hoped that it wasn't.)
And there weren't daily fights about it like back in the QZ either, nobody was trying to take more than what was his, even tho she saw a few kids traiding a portion of their food, it never seemed forced.
The first few times, that she had gotten her lunch there, she was half expecting someone else to just grab it out of her hands and fight with her for it. But no one did, they didn't even try, she was still very wary about her food tho, gulping it down faster than anyone else, but nobody seemed to be judging her for it, even tho she did notice a few pitying looks here and there, that she didn't feel the need to react to.
But she never ate the meat.
Wasting any kind of food would be more than unimaginable for her just a few months ago, but now she just couldn't force herself to eat it, especially if it was a stew, no matter how hard she tried.
'It was a last resort. You think it doesn't shame me? But what was I supposed to do? Let them starve? These people who put their lives in my hands? Who expect me to keep them safe? Who love me?'
But she wasn't so stupid to tell about it to anyone, wasting anything edible has always been greatly punished in the QZ, she still remembered the one time that she had refused to eat a ration nut bar, because of her alergy to peanuts.
(It wasn't that unusual for people to be allergic to stuff even now, but even that didn't seem to matter that much in the QZ, depending on the guard that was on duty and she had the misfortune to get one that hated her guts that day.)
She had gotten all of her rations, other than water, taken away from her for three days and if it wasn't for Riley, she was pretty sure that that would have killed her already malnourished body at that time.
There was no way in hell that she would risk that happening again, especially because Riley wasn't there to save her ass anymore, by her own fault. How ironic.
At first, she did try to hide it somewhere, dumping it inside of a big flower pot or giving it to the dog, that was almost always roaming around since there was food, but just a week of her trying to get unsuspiciously get rid of it, someone had noticed.
And that someone was Jesse.
"Do you wanna swap with me?" The boy was asking her, suddenly coming almost out of nowhere, while holding up a small plate with a peace of peach fruit pie on it.
"Swap?" Ellie snaps out of it and looks at him, she has been too focused on scanning the room trying find a new hiding spot for the bits of her food that she didn't want- the meat, to notice that he came to her.
Swap was a new word and she didn't know if she liked it yet. Especially not if it had to do with her giving him a portion of her food, or him taking it away from her.
"Yeah you know I give you something you give me something in return. I don't really like sweets and you don't seem to enjoy the meat very much..i don't think the plant is really enjoying it either."
Alright, maybe her meat hiding ritual didn't go as unnoticed as she had originally thought.
"Fine, but just because i feel sorry for you and you really need to build some muscles."
(Jesse had never told her, that she could just ask the cantene lady to make her food vegetarian, he didn't think that it mattered that much, even tho he didn't really enjoy meat either, eating mostly plant based at home. It could be their little secret. And if she had ever asked him about it, he would simply just say that the plant was on its last leg and didn't deserve such suffering- that wasn't a lie either.)
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°
Ellie knew, that she could never live up to Sarah.
She wasn't as pretty as her, she didn't always have the right words to say and she especially wasn't as smart as her.
She just wasn't enough. She couldn't be enough. Not for him.
Even when he had placed her picture with him right next to Sarah's, it felt like the girl was looking down at her. Because he had never looked at her like he did at his daughter in the photos, not even close. Maybe that was the reason why she had decided to slowly start moving the photo away from Sarah's, hoping that it would go unnoticed and it wouldn't have to be a constant reminder for him that she will never live up to the daughter, that he had lost.
Joel's words were still rooted really deep inside her, digging their tiny thorns into her heart and squeezing tightly around her little heart every time, leaving it to slowly bleed out, everytime that she managed to even borderline dissapoint him, or when she didn't manage to live up to her own standards that she tried to set up for herself.
'Maria told me about Sarah and.
No. Don't say another word.
Im sorry about your daughter Joel, but i've lost people too.
You have no idea what loss is.'
She knew, that he was still deeply hurting because of Sarah's death, but that still didn't make it alright for him to tell her something so ridiculous.
If there was someone who knew everything about loosing people, it was her.
'Everybody i had cared for, had either died or left me.'
Everyone, who had anything to do with her, had died one way or another. Riley got infected because of the stupid need to say goodbye to her- and she had died by her hand-, Tess got infected because of her too- trying to chase a faint dream of finding some form of a cure that wasn't even possible-, and Marlene died... because of her.
Even her own parents hadn't bother to stay around and raise her. Not even her own flesh and blood, the ones who were supposed to be able to love her unconditionally.
Maybe she really was that unlovable.
'Everybody fucking except for you! So don't tell me, that i would be safer with somebody else, because the truth is, I would just be more scared.'
The truth was, that she has been scared her entire life. If not for her own life, than for somebody elses. There wasn't a day that she wasn't worrying about what will happen to her, or her loved ones. And maybe it wasn't noticible, but she was so fucking terrified.
She was so scared of her life in Jackson, scared of loosing her newfound friends again by her fault, like she did with Riley. She was so afraid of screwing up again and watching the people around her die or get hurt because of her.
Because Ellie Williams was a menace, a deadly curse that always managed to destroy everything at least tiny bit worthy around her.
'You're right, you're not my daughter.
And I sure as hell ain't your dad.'
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°
She has never really been a musical type of person. Sure, she did like to listen to some music during her chores or when she had free time, but it was mostly a way for her to get inspired and gain new ideas for her drawings.
Drawing was her thing, she didn't even know when it started, but she was always sketching something on any little pieces of paper or anything really, that she could find in her free time.
(Sometimes even during school, but miraculously enough that never seemed to get her in trouble in Jackson, since she was more than particular about staying on top of her learning at all times, never slacking no matter what.)
The whole process of drawing had always helped her to get her mind together, to stay calm and collected and forget about everything bad that was happening in the world.
It wasn't really about what she was drawing, but more about the reason why she was drawing it. If someone had opened one of her sketchbooks, they could see her whole life sketched out in front of their eyes, everything that had even mattered to her.
She drew Riley, because she wanted to remember her forever as her bestfriend, not as a mindless infected runner that was trying to torn her apart and especially not as the bleeding gun shot wound on her forehead.
She drew Tess, because she deserved to be remembered for her actions and for the hope in humanity, but mostly because she seemed to be an important part of Joel's life.
She drew her friends- Dina, Jesse and Cat, because they were practically like a second family to her by now, even tho they were usually an annoying pain in her ass.
There were also sketches of animals, from horses to dogs to other livestock. Some drawings of buildings, of the infected or even of food and just nature by itself.
But most importantly, she drew Joel. His drawings were always the most detailed ones, even if it was just a silly sketch of him being on the front porch, holding his favorite cup filled with disgusting bean water, that he seemed to love for some reason.
(Coffee wasn't really easy to get, but Ellie could never see the appeal in it. It was disgusting and bitter, maybe drinkable after adding a lot of milk. But Joel loved it, one time he even traded 2 of his favorite hunting knives for a stupid little bag of coffee beans, but he had banned her from ever mentioning it to anyone.)
Music was Joel's, most importantly his guitar. Ellie still didn't know where he had learned how to play it, but he was really good at it, maybe even better than she was in drawing stuff.
Which was why she couldn't make herself refuse, when he had offered to teach her how to play it one evening.
"Alright kiddo, just put ya little fingers there." Joel was trying to show her how to play the first accord of his favorite song, and she was desperately trying to get it right.
The guitar was gently placed on her lap, while he was standing behind her with his hand on hers, guiding her where to put her fingers to play.
She put her fingers in the right position, exactly how he was showing her, and tried gently stroking the strings with her other hand.
"See! You're a real natural. A few more lectures and you will be better than me." Ellie was fighting to keep the red color from coming onto her cheeks, but she didn't seem to have much success.
"Shut it old man. Agh this is horrible. Now its your turn." And just in a moment, she was turning around showing the guitar gently into his hands, before she sat down on the floor in front of him.
"Little brat." Joel was saying with a slight smile on his lips, knowing why she had done it but not daring to say a word about it to embarass her enough, he would save it for a better opportunity.
He sat down on a chair, with the guitar still in his hands, trying to remember all of the words to the song, that he had promised to play to her again, seeing how patient she seemed to be, maybe even a bit excited.
He was never one to play for someone else, but even that had seemed to change when she came around.
With his fingers in the right positions, he slowly started playing the melody, soon adding the words to it, putting the whole song together.
"If i ever were to loose you,
id surely loose myself.
Everything i have found here,
I've not found by myself.
Try and sometimes you will succeed,
to make this man of me.
All my stolen missing parts,
I've no need for anymore.
Cause I believe,
and I believe cause i can see,
our future days.
Days of you and me.
Back when I was feeling broken
I focused on a prayer
You came deep as any ocean
Did something out there hear?
All the complexities and games
No one wins but somehow they still played
All the missing crooked hearts
They may die but in us they live on.
Cause I believe,
and I believe cause i can see,
our future days.
Days of you and me.
When hurricanes and cyclones raged,
When winds turned dirt to dust,
When floods they came, the tides they raised,
Ever closer became us.
And all the promises at sundown,
I meant them like the rest.
All the demons used to come 'round,
I'm grateful now they've left.
So persistent in my ways,
Hey angel, I am here to stay.
No resistance, no alarms,
Please, this is just too good to be gone.
Cause I believe,
and I believe cause i can see,
our future days.
Days of you and me.
You and me,
It's just, you and me."
And with his last words, Ellie truly knew for the first time in her whole life, that she belonges here. Right in that moment, no matter her past or the mistakes that she had done.
There was no place else that she would rather be at that second, than with him there.
She knew, that the future will be harsh and cruel, but nobody could ever take this moment away from her and that was what mattered, because right now, she was his as much as he was hers.
Their souls were forever intertwined together, destined to meet in every universe.
They had truly saved each other, even if they didn't know it yet, they were engraved deeply inside each other's souls.
No mattered what will happen, they were each others missing peace.
Never to be torn apart by death, or any other force.
The two of them were intertwined by thousands of different lifetimes, playing an interchangeable role in every single one.
(Because every single on of us has a little piece of Joel and Ellie hidden deep inside, and through us they live forever, till the end of time itself.)
This is still as relevant as the day I made it. Though, I must add hand kisses especially because of that fic earlier when he kissed her knuckles because i 🕳👩🦯
I want you all to know that any time I write in a fic Ellie feeling "the brush of Joel's beard against her head" or anything like that, it's a little kiss on the head or forehead. And she doesn't know. But I KNOW. And now you know.
I love our ritual of just coming to tumblr in droves the millisecond ao3 goes down, it really shows off the community spirit we have in regards to reading fanfics and I wouldn't have it any other way
