amateur human being, professional attention whore

Korey, et al. ⭐️ (he/they) ⭐️ AuADHD + DID ⭐️ 20 something ⭐️ will reblog posts that make me breathe slightly harder out my nose ⚠️ MAIN ACCOUNT ⚠️

[thefriendlypigeon]

❤️💙💛GRACEFUL💛💙❤️

⭐[my social media links]

[tzikeh]

More examples of the WORST mansplaining here.

[useyourblinker]

This might be my favorite

[lotsofcatsandcheapwine]

This is mine

[stockyardsyndrome]

[gonzos-humansona]

Yesterday my little brother told me something very sweet and touching, that when he was a kid and had nightmares about monsters chasing him or whatever he would be able to end the nightmare by finding me in the dream and I would protect him by fighting off the zombies, or carrying him away. This is adorable, and makes me feel like the greatest older sibling in the world, but the hilarious thing is that when I was a kid I had nightmares of needing to save him from zombies and such. so many dreams where he was in trouble and I needed to save him. Like my nightmares began where his ended. Low key I think he mastered the ability to psychically transfer his nightmare to me as a child and I'm kind of annoyed with him.

[soulren]

“Ghosts are real” I can see how you could believe that

“Ghosts aren’t real” it’s very fair and rational that you believe that

“Ghosts aren’t real anymore” I’m about to hear a poem or very sad story

“Ghosts aren’t real yet” the fuck are you going to do

[jakegyllenhaalsteeth]

whole lipstick on a pig is bogus to me because we put lipstick on a pig and this is what happened

[fabfemmeboy]

Um excuse me that's not lipstick on a pig. That's eye shadow and mascara on a pig. Clearly there's a difference.

[bigmouthlass]

Miss Piggy has a history of getting carried away with lipstick.

[the-haiku-bot]

Miss Piggy has a

history of getting carried

away with lipstick.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[annabelle--cane]

stop. analyse that text through the lens of its author's intentions and original historical context. okay now take the author out back and kill them dead and analyse that text as though it were published by your mutual yesterday and is in direct conversation with the contemporary discourse that's most relevant to your life. okay now pick your favorite angle of interpretation and come up with the strongest possible argument against it. now imagine that the text is your best friend and that it means you well and that you naturally give it every benefit of the doubt because you're on its side and you want the best for it. now imagine that the text wants you dead and it'll eat you if you don't eat it first. now pretend that you found this text locked away in a cave with no evidence of when or where it came from and you have to divine its meaning solely through its internal coherence and nothing else. okay now address the elephant in the room aspect of the text you've been ignoring because you find it boring or confusing or uncomfortable and become the number one expert on it. now spend forty minutes assigning all the characters dnd classes with at least three sentences of reasoning each. okay now do the cha cha slide.

[donesparce]

There are three breeds of cat:

Chonk

Goblin

Yeah that looks like a cat

[donesparce]

Subcategories of breeds:

Floof

Naked

Normal

[argentinelakeduck]

[formerprincewille]

This is my favorite post

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!

(Submitted by @witless-winion1!)

[crunchy-bisquit]

sometimes im not even trying to spam like tumblr just feeds me all of your posts and i gobble it up like a malnourished child from the 1600s eating chocolate for the first time

[ruthyless-deactivated20140511]

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse danny devito and he would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

[tardis-mind-palace]

Your brother is the best

[elrondbaggins]

Who the fuck changed this from vampires to Danny devito

[aliceinpunderland-blog]

the real question is why I was completely ready to accept that this person had a debilitating childhood fear of Danny Devito

[ninahufflepuff]

Claim your ticket guys:D

[akindplace]

one day you’re going to remember something hurtful that happened to you, but the memories will be hazier, and you will struggle for a few seconds to remember the name of that person who once upset you so much when you were younger, an laugh at yourself because at one point this was something that caused you so much anguish and now everything is different and you’re far removed from that situation. maybe time doesn’t fully heal you, but realizing life went on helps you to let go, even if at times it felt like you wouldn’t.

[ieatratsyummy]

They could never make me hate you, complex female character whose reaction to trauma was not pretty and digestible like how people think it should be.

[suigintou]

deliriously ripping open the sexy fishnet tights of a beautiful woman named bag of mandarins

[isuggestlandback]

If you ever wondered why they call tattoos and piercings "unprofessional" and "unsophisticated"

Source: Lainey Molnar

[pixiecaps]

big fan of whatever the youth is doing to torment scientology buildings

[pixiecaps]

they couldnt take the heat

[doctordotdj]

[excuse-me-thanks]

“i should take a walk for my mental health” boring, tired, i don’t even really wanna do it tbh

“i need to check the perimeter” i need to check the perimeter

[renviary]

all the robins!