if this aint the cutest shit
will byers stan first human second
RMH
Peter Solarz

Janaina Medeiros

izzy's playlists!
Cosimo Galluzzi

shark vs the universe
taylor price
we're not kids anymore.
tumblr dot com
noise dept.

ellievsbear
AnasAbdin
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
🪼

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
hello vonnie
KIROKAZE

Kiana Khansmith
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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@lexigoestodisney
if this aint the cutest shit
So. 10th grade English class. We all come in one morning to find a balloon and a perfectly sharpened pencil on each of our desks. No instructions, no explanation, which is strange, because our teacher is meticulous about that sort of thing. A couple of people try to ask her and she says we’ll get to it. She takes role and then announces that she needs to go to the copy room and she’ll be back in a couple of minutes
Kinda unorthodox, but no one is complaining because this is advanced English and the teacher usually goes kinda hard. So, y’know. Brief respite. We all sit and chat; one of the boys teasingly steals a girl’s balloon, but gives it back to her easily enough; it’s quiet and kind of a nice break. Then the teacher comes back, stops in the doorway, and just stares at us
After a long moment, she says, confused, “You didn’t pop the balloons.”
To which one of the guys about two rows over exclaims, “We’re allowed to pop them?” and immediately turns around and stabs his friend’s balloon with the pencil
There is a vicious revenge balloon-stabbing, and a few more people pop seatmates’ balloons or their own, and the whole time the teacher is just shaking her head. “I can’t believe you didn’t pop your balloons.”
Apparently we were starting Lord of the Flies that day and she wanted to demonstrate the basic concept of kids turning on each other when there are no authority figures present and it was basically my favorite failed social experiment ever
Back in my 10th grade we did a similar things around Lord of the Flies, where we had a test scheduled for that day, and when we walked in, the teacher took role by looking through the window of the door and never entered the classroom. On the board were three tasks written and the teacher had brought in donuts. At first we all sat around and waited for the teacher to come in, but eventually we just started tackling the list of tasks. Task 1- the test. Everybody took it silently, no one cheated, everyone turned it in and we went on to Task Two: tidy up the room. So we did, we split into a couple groups and each one cleaned an area of the room. Task Three: Hand out the donuts. There were 12 donuts, and 30 of us. So we split the donuts into thirds, each took a third, and left the extras for the teacher. After this, the teacher came in absolutely FUMING. She was so upset we had followed all the rules and completed the tasks. Apparently she had been texting kids telling them to start some chaos but they all ignored it because they were too nice. She tried to dock our grades for not going absolutely wild because it meant her class didn’t get the point across
That’s because lord of the flies isn’t representative of humanity it’s representative of rich white male shitheads
And it takes those shit heads a lot longer than one 50 minute class period to go wild.
“Sans teacher supervision, a group of peers will immediately begin breaking down rules and norms regardless of previous behavior patterns” is a weirdly authoritarian take on Lord of the Flies and frankly any English teacher worth their salt ought to be embarrassed if that’s the analysis they took from it
In high school one of the common fund raisers was carnation flowers for a dollar during prom season and valentines and a couple other times of year. And you could “order” flowers to be delivered to kids during their homeroom times so it was always a big deal to get flowers and it was super fun
But one of these fundraisers I had a guy friend who commented he never got any because he was always single or his girlfriend always expected flowers but never gave him any
So my senior year valentines I decided I was going to buy all the guys in my homeroom (which he was in) a carnation and said they were from “Anonymous Girl in your homeroom”
So the day came and all the guys started getting flowers and they all realized they were from the same one girl and all got super excited and giddy and protective of their flowers and all day long I saw the guys in my homeroom wear flowers behind their ears or stuffed in their notebooks and they flaunted them around to other guys that didn’t get flowers. One guy tried to see if it would make his girlfriend jealous. A couple of them tried to play detective to figure it out who it was.
Then the next day apparently they all (or at least most of them) got together and bought all the girls in homeroom a carnation as a thank you to whoever it was so every girl in my homeroom got a bouquet of one from every guy (so it was a bouquet of about a dozen) and every single girl was smiling and happy and bouncy as the guys were the day before
And no one ever knew it was me but I was always super proud of that
One simple act can have a ripple effect of kindness that grows as it spreads
who says stopmotion has to be boring
observations from urgent care
- People who exercise a lot get knee injuries from overdoing it
- People who only exercise occasionally get knee injuries from being unprepared for the exertion
- People who don’t exercise get knee injuries from being out of shape
- Maybe knees just suck
Solution: Don’t have knees.
Just learned that there is going to be a live action Barbie movie and I expect two things from it:
1.) For it to be as good as Legally Blonde AT MINIMUM
2.) A scene where Barbie hands in a resume and it’s as thick as a novel
A little over 8 years ago, a friend of mine, L (name redacted) was hit by her scum-bucket boyfriend. It wasn’t the first time he’d hit her, but it was the first time he’d hit her in front of her best friend J. (name also redacted.) J objected to the abuse, you might say she objected violently to the abuse (which is one of the reasons why the names are redacted even if the statute of limitations should be up.)
After scum-bucket had fled the scene, J decided that L needed some more support, so she called every women she knew. Everyone available showed up to L’s apartment with weapons and booze. Imagine if you will, around 30 women stuffed into a one-bedroom apartment comforting L and passing around the drinks when someone spots scum-bucket’s car pulling into the parking lot.
It was decided that a few ladies would stay in the apartment with L while the rest of us when downstairs to confront scum-bucket and prevent him from entering the building.
Now all of us ladies at that time happened to belong to the same theater group that specialized in swashbuckling plays, lots of sword fights and the like. So, when I say we brought weapons, I mean we brought things like broadswords, battleaxes, crossbows, rapiers and like.
So, scum-bucket gets out of his car and starts walking across the parking lot only to spot 25 or so heavily armed women marching out of the building, raising their weapons and charging at him while screeching like furies.
Scum-bucket had a pretty good sense of self-preservation and the sight of us was inspiring. He ran back to the car and peeled out of the parking light like the hounds of hell were at his heels and I suppose we were.
Anyhow, L never heard from him again. Eventually, she and J started dating and they’ll have been married for 5 years next September.
It is called karma.
*white parent voice* i cant believe kanye and kim named their baby North West!! thats ridiculous!! oh no, its almost 4:30, i need to pick up my kids Mackaylikiah and Ashleighyie from their water polo practice!
I always reblog this post so fucking fast every time it comes on my dash my phone shuts down the tumblr app and reboots
McKarty 64 is my favorite Mario Kart game.
My favorite part is that the blog post the photo was taken from detailed this mother’s decision-making process and chose this name because her husband saw it on a road sign on the way home
She named her daughter after a road sign
a road sign
there was a girl at my school called “zona” cause he parents went on holiday to spain and saw it and thought it was a nice name. IT LITERALLY MEANS ZONE
“47 month old”
this is my four year old rayman origins
“Who’s doing your surgery?”
“Dr. Rayman Origins.”
THE APP REBOOTED FOR ME!!
i met a kid once whose name was “Ryce” and his mum said it was pronounced “Reese”
the best part is she was originally going to spell it “Rice”
My auntie knows a family who decided to name their daughter Owen, but they spelled it “Oin” and they made her middle name the first sound that her big sister made which happened to be “Oogok”. her name is literally “Oin Oogok Puscus”
Oin Oogok Puscus is my favorite dwarf from the Hobbit
Yo I work at a rec center in a rich neighborhood and these are some real names of white children:
Salter Tryge (pronounced Trig) Loots Pocket Aughyst (pronounced August) Taileigh Lotiss Leviathin (yes spelled like that) Bacchus Daniyal (a girl, pronounced like Daniel)
All real
This shit is hilarious
@kaiiwooo
I can’t
47 month old.
Nayvie….. Bish whet????
this is from my kid’s valentine’s list this year like this corny fake unique name thing is no joke yall this is all of the boy names
47 month old.
I refuse to go on knowing someone named their child “Salter” I’m so done ✌🏿️
Treyton lls, I’m dying…
I know a person from college who’s name is literally “Smile”, l can’t even explain how ridiculous that is…
47 month old
47 month old
Damn suburban moms love to put unnecessary “Y’s” in names.
<b>47 month old<b/>
47 month old.
Somebody named their kid Pocket?!?!???
I am cry wheeze laughing at this post, and then when I got to the bottom I had apparently already hearted it at some point in its life?
Anyway, bless little Christopher’s parents. My god.
47 month old tho
One of the classes I subbed in had a kid named Glarison. I’m sorry, did you misspell Garrison?????
OMG IT IS BACK! I CAN FINALLY POST THE ASK I GOT ABPUT THIS!
I went to college and took religious studies courses with a girl named Storm Pagan. She never understood why I found that both funny and oddly appropriate, and I never felt like taking the time to explain.
for the love of your future children, look up what a name means in all languages before you saddle you kid with it until they’re old enough to legally change it.
I took latin in middle school. I don’t actually remember much now, but i’m telling you, it was IMPOSSIBLE to look this girl I knew in passing in the eye because her name was Latrina.
Latrina.
(For those of you who have no idea why this is unfortunate and hilarious, ‘latrina’ is one of the latin words for toilet)
What the fuck that even sounds like ‘Latrine’ like who looked at that name and went ‘what could possibly go wrong’
Kids I actually went to school with: Nipponia (Her parents were really enthusiastic about Japan and thought no one would know.) Foreverina Twins – Heavyn-Leigh and Eterni-Teigh Khayrliy (Carly) MyckEnziey (yes, spelled like that.) Every last one of them was white n blonde.
Naming your kids after gods seems like s BAD PLAN whether you believe in them or not. Especially Odin and Bacchus.
4 7 M O N T H O L D
I knew I pair of sisters named Chardonnae and Breane (nicknamed Brie). Fucking wine and cheese
Heavyn-Leigh and Eterni-Teigh ……. I???……what the fuck 😂😂😂
47 month old
Congrats to you for getting throught this post
Now I’m so fucking glad I’m named megan
This is why at the library I would make EVERYONE spell their name for me. Some white lady over 35: You want me to spell Linda Smith
Me: Lady, you don’t know my life. I have looked into the abyss.
47 month old
i’ve baby sat 3 kids, all white and blonde, and their names were Kale, Demi(i forgot her full name), and Xaviera
At least they’re going to learn to spell hard words early on.
My mom was best friends with 2 twins, Leather and Suede
47 month old
I knew a kid named Kyler…
i babysat for a girl named Brynnleigh. just stick with the basic names…..
Used to be friends with an Ashileigh. Her younger sister was Amberleigh.
“Lady, you don’t know my life. I have looked into the abyss.”
Omg, I worked in a library, and then went on to working in Child Support
I CANNOT UNSEE SOME OF THESE NAMES
The worst one was a first/last name combo that I don’t want to post in case the poor girl ever googles herself, but the synonyms would be “Infant Shager” which… I get why as a kid you can’t change your name but this was an adult???? Change your name???
Saw a “Rainbow” that was something like “Reygnnbeauxx”
Dreamylove was also a name I saw with my own two eyeballs.
Once, just once, had a little girl come to the desk with the same name as my real name when getting a library card. Then I had the mom spell it. Omg my soul left my body, there were so many extra and unnecessary letters. My real name is already 8 letters long. I think this mom managed to nearly double it.
Wtf, parents??? Knock that shit off.
What I love about this post is the pauses between stories for people to emphasise “47 month old”
It legit reminds me of captain holt’s meltdown with 47 month old replacing “bOoOOone!!”
My grandmother is a bitter old crab with nothing good to say about anything, but she does have a few good stories. She confronted the woman my grandfather had been cheating on her with - this other woman had no idea he was married, and was righteously angry.
The two of them schemed together. My grandfather’s mistress drove her convertible to the construction site where he was working. As he approached the car, she said, “Why didn’t you tell me you were married?”
“Married?! I’m not married!” he said.
My grandmother sat up in the back seat, where she’d been lying down, and said, “You won’t be for much longer.”
HOLY SHIT
This is a Country song.
Reblogging because I had a dream in which this came in vitally handy.
Not that it matter but don't these people realize that kids who are half white can come out looking completely like their white parents. Like my grandpa is an Afro- Latino and my mom looks completely like her mother whose mostly white. I don't understand why race mixing matters anyway 🤷🏻♀️people love who they love.
Because they’re stupid
My favorite examples of how crazy genetics can be is with twins
I love genetics. Biology is a trip
This is always so cool.
People like to think that genetic inheritance is like a 50/50 split of traits or some shit when in reality it’s like a fucking free for all who gets to take what spot and what traits develop as a result like
Baby armadillo.
Humans will pet anything.
How wonderful, then, to live on a planet full of creatures that like to be petted!
“ How wonderful, then, to live on a planet full of creatures that like to be petted!”
It truly is.
Remember when tumblr turned off replies for like a whole year because they worked on a new system but apparently couldn’t let the old one stay meanwhile for some reason
Remember when tumblr was actively asking ppl to stop using the third party extension “missing e”(forefather to xkit) because apparently they didn’t wanna admit its the only way that’d make it bearable to even use tumblr.
Remember when tumblr purged users who uploaded audio posts of copyrighted music. Not removing the posts but the accounts would risk being deactivated if they had even one audio post.
Remember when tumblr made a “pinned post” feature so other blogs pinned posts was always at the top of your dashboard and you couldn’t remove it.
Remember how you could risk deleting your whole account when you just wanted to delete a sideblog
Remember when ask posts wasn’t rebloggable
remember when you had to scroll back to the top of the post to like/reblog it
Back in the super old days, reblogging a post brought you to a whole entire other page. You then had to add tags in a separate box and then publish the post. You could basically have fifty posts in different tabs all ready to be posted.
Blocking an anon would bring the person’s url to your blocked users list so you could always see who sent anon hate.
There was no instant reblog button till like 2015
i would kill to live in a small home with no financial worries
grow my own vegetables. some medicinal herbs. what more do you need
A cat
a cat.