Meant Earnestly, Said Facetiously

She/her. 23. Queer. No rhyme or reason here.

[guerrillatech]

[firefox-official]

love sleeping in guest bedrooms. they’re always just a Little off

[firefox-official]

blanket is tucked in too tight. headboard is too cold. fan is a little too loud. it’s incredible

[booksandberries]

#liminal space but Inside A House

You’re welcome here, but not for too long

[coynsundry]

[keybladesoras]

It is forbidden. No living thing has seen me without my helmet since I swore to the Creed.

I am not a living thing.

[anakintrashblog]

[skankplisskenmoved]

[science-fiction-is-real]

[callousisms-blog]

[charlottec21]

[quetzalpali]

[watergirl1996]

LAST TIME I REBLOGGED THIS THE LAST COMPARISON WASNT ON THERE

[klubbhead]

[above-average-gravy-deactivated]

This is the best thing I have ever seen

[klubbhead]

[unaffiliatedpangolin]

@klubbhead You used a cinnamon roll for Rey and not Leia?

[klubbhead]

[sculptingsuccess]

Dam it it got better

[klubbhead]

[nunyabizni]

S T O P

[uhnkass-blog]

@klubbhead

Do Darth Maul next!

[klubbhead]

[rebeccafultz-blog]

This is why I love Tumblr. Do Yoda next please or Boba Fett.

[klubbhead]

Oh god. I can’t even think of something for them lol

[thej-key]

Yoda gotta be raisin bread.

[nexar-k]

[tht-lesbian-fangirl]

ENOUGH

[klubbhead]

NO

😬

[friendly-neighborhood-ehrhardt]

do grand moff tarkin.

[klubbhead]

[maskofprime-moved-3-18-2018]

[fatalis-black]

The last one got me.

[theoldandinactive]

I CAN’T

B R E A T H E

XD

[lonely-roads-at-midnight]

i was mildly amused until the last one, at which point i broke

[eriggyageptulel]

[lightdusk96]

IT GOT BETTER

[piratecherricola-deactivated202]

OMG BABY YODA

@coffeebucko @llamaonesie @yescanteloupe

[catchymemes]

[baddeststudpapi]

Pinky was really the homie even when Brain was an ass about shit

[rudeassbeach]

This legit made my heart warm

[tvandfilm]

[trixie-katya-tati]

According to Evah Destruction, their Dragula contract forbids them from being on Drag Race.... girl, this ain’t it! Why would they do this?

[racingbarakarts]

I used to have geese so here’s a tip for everyone:

If a goose is attacking you, don’t run. No matter what, stand your ground. They can fly but when they’re mad, they don’t usually try to fly. Hold your hands in front of you, ready to grasp. When the goose gets close, grab it by the neck bit closest to the head and squeeze. Not tight enough to choke the goose, but tight enough so they can’t break free. You can hold them until they calm down or just do the next step right away. The next step is literally just to chuck them as far as possible and run for your life. It makes the goose know you’re in charge and you have a better chance of getting away. Trust me I’ve done this so many times that I’ve lost count

[myblogisnotinteresting]

I can’t tell if this is a shitpost or actual advice. But I do know geese are the fucking worst.

[racingbarakarts]

Actual advice! Just yeet a goose

[61below]

Yeet the geese

[racingbarakarts]

I’ve been reading the replies to this so here’s an update!

DO NOT KICK A GOOSE. Geese are very important for nature as they maintain insect populations and they help pick weeds that try to kill useful plants! Geese are good, they’re just grumpy. Never kick one because you could fatally injure them. They do not have the bone structure to survive a strong kick.

I had to deal with this a lot because my family bred geese. Geese are not happy about their eggs being taken so after you take one, they remember for their whole lives. We had a farm, we did what we had to do in order to survive. We loved our geese and our geese loved us, just not when we were taking their babies.

Do not kill Geese just because they’re mean. Please

Yes you could crawl towards them, but that only works if it’s one goose. If it’s more than one attacking you, you can yeet them as they get close.

This post was about white geese, which is what we bred, but you can do this for Canadian geese too! Because attacking a Canadian goose can get you a fine and even jail time, this is a much nicer approach to being attacked by a goose.

Also for some reason a lot of replies are saying this can break a goose’s neck???? It can’t??? Don’t spread lies. Geese are built to be picked up by the neck and they have tons of muscles in their necks to support being thrown. This is how they fight each other. It doesn’t hurt them. Just stuns them.

DO NOT DO THIS TO SWANS!!!!!!! SWANS ARE EVIL IF YOU ARE BEING ATTACKED BY A SWAN JUST ACCEPT YOUR DEATH. THEY WILL NOT BE STUNNED. THEY WILL NOT FORGET. THEY WILL FOLLOW YOU HOME AND MURDER YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. SWANS ARE DEMONS

[askfordoodles]

Actually, I have picked up a swan by just, slotting in under my arm; once their wings are held in place they just sorta hiss a bit and accept their fate. It’s how wildlife centres and rspca deal with them. They just use swan-bags, I’M NOT kidding, that completely neutralizes them. LOOK AT ALL THESE DEMONIC BULLIES BEING DEFEATED BY BEING CHIHUAHUA-HANDBBAGGED.

In fairness, in MY CASE, this was a juvenile male, but old enough that the dad had evicted it from the lake. He was in my way, hissing and refusing to move; and if you hiss at me, that’s a challenge, baby!

[kedreeva]

Most birds will accept their date once you have their wings (geese will, in my experience, chill once you have them under an arm too, I pick them up like that). They transport peafowl in sacks like that too:

[magellan-88]

This post is a journey

[funeral-clown]

bird straitjackets

[violadvis]

Friends | 1x09 “The One Where Underdog Gets Away”

[petalya]

in therapy my therapist and i were talking about my own feelings of self worth in relationships. and she asked me to say qualities about myself that someone else would be attracted to, on a romantic and platonic level. so i named some things like compassionate, empathetic, etc. and she said “you named things that you can give someone. ways you can serve, rather than ways that you are” and y'all..my mind was blown that’s gonna stick with me forever like she then proceed to tell me actual innate qualities about myself that she liked and thought anyone else would like as well and i hadn’t even considered those because like she said i was focused on things i could do outwardly to attract and maintain connections rather than who i was as a person..goddamn!!! thats tea!!!

[petalya]

With this in mind, this also makes me think of the ways people describe us. When people say the reasons that they love/like you or describe you as a person, are they only naming ways that you serve them? Are they equating your worth with how much you do for them?

ex. “You’re such a good listener. You’re so generous, you’re so compassionate. You’re always there for me. You always hold me down. You’re reliable”

vs.

“You’re so funny! You’re very vibrant. You’re creative, passionate, and intelligent. You’re optimistic. You’re so talented at ____” , etc. I think that’s very telling.

[hauntified-deactivated20210730]

This FUCKED relationships up too because once this hit me, I realized people can just be in love with the way you make them feel instead of who you actually are. ALWAYS pay attention to the last little “vs” bit there because it IS super telling

[nochillsteve-archived-deactivat]

#ICONIC™

[marauders4evr]

Abled Person: Hey man, can you hold this wad of $2,000 and this one penny for me while I open my wallet?

Disabled Person: YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER FOOL!

The United States Government:

(Watch how many people don’t get this.)

[marauders4evr]

#raises hand #i dont understand #please explain? 

In order for disabled people to receive any sort of financial assistant for their housing, food, bills, medical supplies, etc., they cannot ever have more than $2,000 of resources to their name. Ever.

It doesn’t matter what it’s for.

You’re saving up for a new wheelchair?

For college?

To put a downpayment on a house?

Hell man, you just happen to budget for once in your life so that you can have some extra money in case something bad happens?

Your benefits immediately get cut off if you’re a cent over $2,000.

And, even worse, you usually end up having to pay back every dollar the government gave you that month.

So say you get $400. If they find out you’re twenty dollars over the resource limit, you have to give them all $400 back and you undergo an investigation of your funds to see if you will continue getting money.

“What if I spend the money that day?”

Doesn’t matter. In fact, from what I can tell, people who do this are actually put under investigation for fraud.

And yes, this system literally kills people.

[locuas642]

Remember when “Guardians of the Galaxy” came out? one of Rocket Racoon’s creators, Bill Mantlo, suffered an accident in 1992 and has irreparable brain damage.

before the movie came out, Marvel gave him an exclusive preview screening. SOme people were upset because they felt if Marvel was really wanted to thank mantlo, they should have donated money to Mantlo’s family.

Bill Mantlo’s brother had to come out and explain: If Marvel gave them monetary aid, Bill Mantlo would lose his financial assistance.

[rootbeergoddess]

That’s so utterly depressing.

[sushinfood]

disgusting

[beeskeepony]

I have friends on welfare who won’t pick up a penny in the street because they’d risk the welfare they struggled to get for 10 years.

[raenboow]

oh look another fucked up thing in this world. let’s just add it to the list. number 63858b

[luvtonique]

My brother has been on California State SSI for autism for the last 10 years, and he absolutely has to (no joke, HAS TO) spend all 720 bucks of his SSI every month, because if he puts it in the bank he risks losing his SSI altogether.

Sometimes, at the end of the month, he has no idea what to do with his money because the whole month went by and he still has 400-ish bucks in his account, and he fucking panics because he doesn’t want to get anywhere near 2,000.

And here’s the funnest part of the story!

One day he did a huge commission on Second Life and wound up earning 1500 bucks off of it, and he told the guy to donate it 500 bucks at a time over 3 months. The guy didn’t want to, and just donated all 1500, which put my brother at 2,036 bucks.

The state IMMEDIATELY (I’m talking less than an hour) called him up to tell him over the phone that they were canceling his SSI, because they noticed he had gone over the 2,000 buck threshold. He had to tell them that someone had made a charitable donation to him and that this was not a common occurrence in any way shape or form, and upon not believing him, my mother had to call to talk to them as his legal caretaker and say basically the same thing until they called off the cancellation of his SSI money.

He also had to cancel his renter’s assistance because it put him to 1,062 a month, so if he went 30 days without spending any money they’d cancel his SSI altogether. Like, none of us in the family have any fucking clue why that regulation is in place and it’s the stupidest shit in human history.

Please, legal side of Tumblr, tell me what positive reasoning this law has?

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

Happy 4th of July everyone! This is what the “nation of opportunity” looks like.

[xfirecorex]

There’s something called an ABLE account that can help. If you are on SSI and were diagnosed as disabled before the age of 26 you can apply for an ABLE account that will allow you to save up to $99,000. More people need to know about this!

[strawbebbynya]

thank you so much for this information. i’m applying for an abled account right now

[viostormcaller]

THERES A WHAT

OH GOD BLESS THE SHIT OUTTA YOU YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW FREAKED OUT OVER THIS I WAS

[septic-dr-schneep]

I’ve been looking into SSI; I had no idea about this!

[perksofbeingdisabled]

Read till the end for the important info

[whatevercomestomymind]

Reblog to literally save a disabled person’s life

[feminismandmedia]

[siderealscion426]

[orbsdotorg]

This was my actual favorite part of working in a theater. People would come in and use a string of words no human had ever uttered and I’d have to be like “ohhhhkay let’s parse this out.”

[lizbid33]

When Blockers first came out people would come up to the box office and say “Hey can I get one ticket to COCK blockers” and I’d be like “yeah of course” but internally I was screaming

[unclefather]

[kittydesade]

Spooky Shopkeeper: The price may be more than you expect to pay.

Me: Yes, I know how US taxes work, too.

[del3141]

Shopkeeper, increasingly exasperated: I’m trying to tell you that I’m evil and offering these wares with no regard for the harm they will do!

Me, also increasingly exasperated: I know what capitalism is too goddammit

[bourtange]

straight people should have to wear “VISITOR” badges when they go to gay bars