Outdated Memes

LV-29-he/they This is my personal/shitpost account where I reblog random shit. My art blog is little-vimpress-art.tumblr.com

[hagiomoto]

Daily reminder to Americans on this website that American war on Iran is bad because Iranians are getting killed not because you can no longer afford going to the movies in the weekends or refill your car 😒

[kaity--did]

Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk

“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”

[kaity--did]

Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?

Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby

Husband: RIVETING!

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️

Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!

[kaity--did]

Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk

All of tumblr collectively at my husband:

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream

Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!

Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued

Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.

[kaity--did]

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND

yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays

Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.

????

[kaity--did]

Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave

Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!

[kaity--did]

FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering

[justplainsalty]

I have follow up questions:

1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?

1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?

[kaity--did]

I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.

Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂

So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂

[kaity--did]

Everyone is always so so kind on this post but I do want to warn you all that this did in fact lead to an insanely verbal child, and if you choose that life you have to commit to that life.

Penny Rose is now 5 years old and she

1. Starts talking the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she passes out at night

2. Asks, and I am not exaggerating I counted, an average of 892 questions a day

3. Does not accept "I don't know" as an answer to said questions, will usually have a follow up question as to why you don't know OR a suggestion on how we can find out together

I pay for limitless data and have 709 Google tabs open on my phone at all times

[sm64mario]

Hey! Mario was just wondering. Could you'a put a vending machine here? In the middle of this crowded intersection?

[captain-price-returns]

[quasi-normalcy]

I don't understand how this is even a defence in the age of drone warfare.

[graham-folger]

Or even like... Cannon warfare.

[quasi-normalcy]

Yeah, the Ottomans could have taken this in the fourteenth century.

[biglawbear]

One siege tower and that shits cooked

[deluske]

prev nailed it

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

If you're building defenses *during* a zombie apocalypse you gotta use what's on hand, but building this *before* a zombie apocalypse, this is a terrible choice. You'd be better off with a normal (very tall) metal fence, with metal bars that you can see between. Not only would that let your garden, solar panels and home get some FUCKING SUNLIGHT, but you could see and attack zombies through the fence with polearms. And it's easy to find and repair issues with the fence; zombies put a hole in one of these shipping containers (not hard if there's a lot of zombies) and repairs are a much bigger job. Also, you have to kill zombies that are now INSIDE YOUR WALLS.

These walls make the only avenue of attacking zombies shooting down from the walls and towers. Which massively reduces your attack angles, means you can't get any that happen to be attacking from a blind spot, and means that your defence is completely reliant on bullets. If the problem is zombies (which, traditionally, are not known for their marksmanship), this is an awful defence against them. A normal metal bar fence would be much better.

[hollowedskin]

My favourite part is the water tank that's outside the walls.

[thistle-daily-until-s2]

Way cool. Drab. Soggy…

Day 13. 437 days left (sort of)

[legalizegay]

Must watch

[capacity]

This could save the world you know

[beboots]

[antivan-surana]

@eazzy--pink

[sycamorality]

did you know you can rename everything on your pc

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

Chinese netizens sandboarding in the desert

[molombo]

Hi @orbitalpirate I acted out your famous tumblr post. What do you think?

[memewhore]

[mchi22]

i fuckin hate games where u furnish/decorate a house because it reminds me i truly have no fucking idea what youre supposed to have in a room

[mchi22]

[lazer-exe]

I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare

[thistle-daily-until-s2]

Day 11. 439 days left (sorta)

Thistle and his special white boy yaad. I love a thistle striking fear into the hearts of people. He is being so ominous. Thistle you little weirdo why are you holding your grand-nephew-not-grand-nephew’s neck and whispering into his ears? He has to do it for the intimidation points I reckon

[ouroborosorder]

honestly I hate “can you pet the dog?!?” not for any of the common reasons but because it was initially interesting as a proposition of “can you interact with the world in a way that is not within the primary mechanical loop” and that very quickly fell away to being “well now any indie developer making a game has to have a pet the dog button or they’re going to get letters”

[ouroborosorder]

One of my dream projects has an NPC with a dog, and if you try to pet it, the owner tells you not to do that. If you try again, it bites you and you take damage. I want to do this entirely because I genuinely believe that this would make me feel way more grounded in the world than any “click button to see cute animation” would ever do, and also it would be really funny to have a game where people lose their runs because they tried to pet a dog they were told not to pet

[catgirldragon]

[sistertaxon]

[wiki-but-made-them-up]

[maja-paja]

[i-am-a-lesbigwen]

does anyone have that 4chan post about the guy who got like. deradicalised from being an incel because he started taking care of shrimp?

[nyxwoven]

i can't post pictures in replies so here u go

[i-am-a-lesbigwen]

thats the one! thank you!

[ziggy-scardust]

I think of shrimp guy often and I hope he and his shrimp are doing great and if I ever meet him I would love to ask about them